Lily Evans and an Incredible Amount of Romantic Frustration
by whatpassesformymind
Summary: With one year left at Hogwarts, you'd think the stress of N.E.W.T.s would be enough to keep everyone occupied. But Lily's friends are getting ideas (and dates), Remus has a secret (or two), James is being strangely well behaved, and things might look quite different by the time these seventh years leave Hogwarts... Rated mostly for language and innuendo.
1. September 1977 (I)

**Thursday 1** **st** **September 1977**

Platform nine and three quarters was just as busy as it was every year on September first. Maybe a few parents held their children closer than usual, the goodbyes were a little more tearful, and on closer inspection many of the adults and older students were tense and kept their wands close at hand – but this was nearly Hogwarts, and Hogwarts was safe. For every worried face in the crowd there were five carefree children shouting to their friends as they ran up and down the platform next to the long scarlet steam engine.

The minute hand on the clock ticked forwards, and a guard called five minutes to departure. The hectic movement on the platform increased suddenly as everyone shoved oversized cases full of robes and books onto the train and last minute goodbyes were made.

"Have you got your wand, Millie?" one frantic parent called. Further down the platform, someone was unsuccessfully trying to push a cauldron through an open window.

The bells rang for eleven am, and doors slammed shut all along the train, muffling the noise from the platform. Sirius and James waved to Mr and Mrs Potter one last time through the little window in the door, and headed down the train to find an empty compartment. A few tiny first years dashed past them in the opposite direction, clutching their brand new wands.

"We were never that small – tell me I was never that small Prongs, they probably can't even reach the Dungbomb shelf in Zonko's." Sirius peered in through the doors until they finally found one with no one else in and wedged their cases onto the luggage rack, James nearly dropping his onto his face.

"Yeah yeah, hilarious," he grumbled as Sirius laughed, fixing his glasses "I have to run though, pre-meeting meeting soon – you'll be alright on your own?"

"I'm not sure how I'll cope without your company for more than five seconds after this summer Prongs, but I'm sure I can find a way. Don't be late to your… Did you seriously just say pre-meeting meeting?" Sirius snorted.

"Well I know how you pine without me," James winked at him and headed straight back out of the door.

"Hey, have you told her yet?" Sirius shouted after him, but got no reply. He sighed, and settled back into the cushions to wait for the arrival of the rest of their friends… for their final journey to Hogwarts, and their last year – last Halloween, last Hogsmeade trips, last time sharing a dormitory.

Before he could get too lost in premature nostalgia, the door slid open, and he jumped out of his seat to launch himself at a tired and worn looking Remus. It was only a few days past the full moon, Sirius remembered a second too late, and they somewhat predictably went down on the ground in a pile of limbs. Remus was laughing though, and hugging him back with one arm (rubbing his ribs with the other, where he had fallen onto his case). Sirius bounced back up onto his feet and tugged Remus up, carefully ignoring the fact that he maybe liked touching Remus a little more than he maybe should (as he had all summer, when his stomach had started doing stupid backflippy things over every letter). Sirius was not one to repress his feelings, and had spent all summer flirting his (rather fantastic, if he did say so himself) arse off with Remus and had gotten precisely nothing in response. Sirius knew what 'no' looked like when he saw it, and right now he saw it in flashing neon letters above Remus' head. He made his interest perfectly clear, Remus continued acting exactly as he had always done, so now Sirius was going to follow suit and deal with it.

* * *

James made his way down the crowded Hogwarts Express, smiling and waving to people he recognised, and ducked into a toilet halfway down to change into his school uniform. He stood in front of the mirror as he pinned his badge to the front of his robes, and ran his hands through his hair until it looked a bit less like his mother had just tried to flatten it down. This would be the year that everything worked out – it had to be.

Despite having Sirius move in, he'd had an awful lot of time that summer to just think. And the thoughts he came out with at the end weren't entirely pleasant ones. This was the final year at Hogwarts for all of them, and alongside the usual mix of excitement and sadness and terror at the real world (particularly as it was right now – but he could forget all of that when he was in the castle) was the problem of one Lily Evans. Not that he heard from her once all holidays – and that was the issue, wasn't it. Of course he didn't hear from her, he never did when they were away from Hogwarts. Complete silence was the norm for them, and what they would presumably revert to when everyone when their separate ways at the end of seventh year, because whatever else they were (not much, and nowhere near as much as James would like), they weren't friends.

Lily would disappear off and live her undoubtedly fantastic life and James would go off in another direction and never hear from her again. Maybe one day he'll hear about her wedding and have a little shock that he hasn't thought of her in months or even years (and who is he kidding, he can't imagine going more than a day without thinking about Lily) and now she's just the girl he used to have a crush on for seven years that never went anywhere, and maybe he can't quite remember what she looks like anymore, just a flash of red hair and the knowledge that she was the prettiest girl he'd ever seen ad what if one day he can't quite grasp the exact feeling in his stomach when she smiles because he was an idiot anymore and –

And he's been in this bathroom for longer than is really acceptable having the same freak out he's been having all summer. James washed his hands and left, continuing along the train. The conclusion he'd come to, at about three am one somewhat tipsy night after one of his parents' parties, was that this year he had to get his shit together. He would be a model student if he had to be (kind of. Whenever a lot of staff members were watching and Snivellus wasn't involved, anyway), but this was his last ever chance with Lily and he was not going to throw it all away. As if someone somewhere knew about James' brand new mid-year resolution, his letter had come the next morning. He reached the end carriage, and sat down to wait.

* * *

Since his second year Remus had always looked forwards to going back to Hogwarts more than nearly anything. He loved his parents dearly, but he had never quite recovered from the surprise of finding three friends who not only looked straight past the fact that one of their best friends turned into a dangerous animal once a month, but then decided that the only logical solution was to become illegal Animagi. The guilt gnawed at him on long nights when he couldn't get to sleep, but never enough to make them stop – he was too selfish to tell them no. During the school year, he could almost ignore the fact that he was loathed by most of the magical community… But now it was nearly over. The illusion was about to shatter, and Remus couldn't help but wonder if this time next year he would be alone and feral.

He reached Sirius' compartment and shook his head as if to get rid of these thoughts before opening the door. Within seconds, he found himself on the ground underneath Sirius, laughing as he was pulled to his feet before they both fell back into their seats.

"How was summer, tell me everything," Sirius demanded quickly.

"I saw you two weeks ago and sent you three letters since then; would you like to hear the fascinating story of my packing?" Remus avoided the topic of the last full moon – and also the topic of how strangely Sirius had been acting this summer, because it couldn't possibly mean what Remus secretly wished it did.

* * *

Peter Pettigrew's case was full to bursting. Every single textbook from the last six years, plus his new ones, was jammed in with his clothes and chocolate frog cards and everything else. As a result, it weighed about twice as much as it should, and took five times longer than usual to drag along the corridor. The only thing on his mind (other than finding his friends, and hopefully soon) was passing his N.E.W.T.s.

He finally found the right compartment and opened the door. Sirius' and Remus' greetings were quickly interrupted by the enormous _thud_ as he dropped his case to the ground.

"Blimey Pete, what have you got in there, bricks?" Sirius asked. Peter flushed and muttered out a few excuses. James and Sirius sailed through exams without seeming to try at all, and Remus might have his nose in a book half of the time but Peter was pretty sure he didn't actually need to study. They would all become Aurors or something, and he would be left behind.

He struggled with his case for a few minutes, pushing and pulling at it in a hopeless attempt to get it onto the luggage rack, before Remus took pity on him and levitated it up.

"You've been very quiet this summer Pete, you have to tell us everything – wait, is there a girl involved?!" Sirius interrogated him. Peter laughed weakly.

"No! Just busy, you know, family things, and, stuff." Which wasn't entirely a lie, his family would probably be disappointed if he failed, but he couldn't admit that he spent most of his time studying (or that it seemed to be a hopeless case). The conversation turned back to the upcoming year, and Sirius pulled out a pack of cards for a round of Exploding Snap.

* * *

"Okay, but this year we've got it in the bag. Hufflepuff's best players all graduated, and James-" Marlene ignored Lily's automatic annoyed expressions "- has some kind of brutal training plan apparently, there's not a chance of us losing the cup this time!"

"That's great Marlene, we will be at every match… but I asked what time it is, I forgot my watch."

"Oh, your meeting starts in five minutes, Head Girl," Marlene gave her an apologetic smile as Lily swore and dived for her trunk, books dropping to the floor as she dug her robes and badge out. She hurried down the corridor, tapping her foot impatiently as she waited outside the nearest bathroom. A frightened looking first year in oversized robes emerged clutching Muggle clothes and Lily ducked straight in. This was not exactly the start to her final year at Hogwarts that she had imagined, she reflected as she struggled with her tights. She was already late, she didn't even know who the Head Boy was yet, and – she opened the bathroom door just as a dark haired figure walked past and pulled it shut quickly. And Lily would be leaving Hogwarts, leaving Severus, and she didn't know quite how she felt about that yet.

A knock at the door reminded her that now was definitely not the time to figure it out, and she dashed down the rest of the corridor, shoving her jeans into her bag as she went. She flung open the door to the Prefect's carriage at the end of the train.

"Hey, hi, sorry, I'm not too late am I, I left my watch at home…" Lily trailed off as the only other occupant of the room got up, running one hand through his hair.

"Only ten minutes Evans, I'll let you off for now," James Potter was standing in front of her, Head Boy badge and all. Lily opened her mouth, and then closed it again.

"… Right."

* * *

Lily collapsed into a seat opposite Marlene in one of the carriages waiting to take them up to the castle.

"Lily!" Elizabeth cried, jumping to her feet to hug her. A second later they were joined by Jenny, and Lily had to elbow her way out from under her friends so that she could breathe properly.

"What took you so long Lils, we thought we must have missed you," Jenny asked, nudging her over for more seat space "Any exciting gossip from the Prefect's meeting? Who's the new Head Boy?"

"Please tell me it's that Ravenclaw prefect," Elizabeth mock fanned herself.

"Yes Lily, who is the mysterious new Head Boy?" Marlene asked, smirking at her. Lily groaned and let her head drop into her hands, muttering.

"Sorry, didn't quite catch that?" Marlene looked positively gleeful.

"IT'S JAMES FUCKING POTTER AS YOU DAMN WELL KNOW!" The other girls collapsed into laughter.

"Oh my god," Jenny gasped out, still laughing.

"Yeah, Sirius told me," said Marlene.

"This year is going to be wonderful," Eliza declared.

"I don't think you know what that word means, and you're all terrible people."

"Ah Lily, you love us really!"

The carriage pulled up to the front steps, and they continued gossiping all the way in to the Great Hall. They had just sat down at the Gryffindor table when a loud voice came from behind them.

"If it isn't four of my absolute favourite people!" Sirius dropped onto the bench opposite, grinning. "James, James, sit down, our Heads should be sitting together." James, Remus and Peter joined them, rolling their eyes at Sirius and chattering excitedly. Lily directed her gaze away from James, scowling.

While they were talking the new first years had filed in, led by Professor McGonagall, and were standing in front of the teachers' table. The hall fell silent, staring at the ragged sorting hat. One of the many rips opened, and it began to sing.

"I swear some of this is the same as from our first year," Sirius whispered.

They all applauded the new students as one by one they were sorted and sent to sit at their new house tables, and finally Professor McGonagall was carrying the stool ad sorting hat away and Professor Dumbledore stood.

"Welcome, welcome, new students and old, to another year at Hogwarts! I just have a few quick words before we can enjoy our no doubt excellent feast. Firstly, I'm sure you will join me in welcoming Professor Earley, who will be taking the position of Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher as Professor Bowman has chosen to take an early retirement." There was a polite round of applause as the new teacher stood up briefly.

"Secondly, the heads of houses and myself have agreed upon the appointment of Miss Lily Evans and Mr James Potter, both of Gryffindor, as Head Girl and Head Boy this year, and we hope to see them working together for an exciting year at Hogwarts." Lily resisted the urge to hide under the table, instead staring off at a patch of wall while most of the other students clapped and Sirius made as much enthusiastic noise as he could.

"Now – let's eat!" Dumbledore clapped his hands, and the plates filled with mountains of food. A few of the first years gasped. Lily picked out all of her favourite foods within reach, trying not to watch the mildly disgusting display of Sirius loading his plate with absolutely everything including the mint humbugs.

"So, Quidditch."

Marlene swallowed quickly, and within seconds she and James were deep in a tactical discussion of the upcoming season, Sirius commenting whenever his mouth was empty enough. Remus caught Lily's eye and rolled his eyes.

By the time dessert had appeared and been eaten, Lily was half asleep. Jenny and Elizabeth were leaning on each other's shoulders, regretting the last two bowls of ice cream, and Peter was actually asleep on the table. The plates finally emptied, and Lily pushed herself to her feet unwillingly. She opened her mouth to speak, but someone beat her to it.

"Gryffindors! First year Gryffindors follow me!" She turned to see James shouting and waving one arm in the air, trying to attract the attention of all the Gryffindors. "Just go to bed you two, you look dead," he added more quietly.

"Thanks," Lily said, surprised, and glanced down at Remus, who looked as though standing might be beyond him. She offered a hand, and stumbled off after Marlene towards Gryffindor tower. Behind them James continued calling over the crowds and trying to herd the first years.

* * *

 **Friday 2** **nd** **September 1977**

"Why can't we just start on Monday?" A bleary eyed Sirius muttered into his breakfast. Professor McGonagall was walking down the Gryffindor table, distributing timetables for the year. Remus rolled his eyes, ignoring Sirius in favour of the Daily Prophet. "This is just a completely unnecessary extra Friday, come on, it's pointless!"

At this point Professor McGonagall reached them, dropping rolls of parchment down in between the plates of bacon and bowls of cereal. They all reached for them with varying degrees of enthusiasm.

"Double Transfiguration first thing, Herbology, Charms, Care of Magical Creatures… Ah excellent, free after last break!" James exclaimed.

"Must be nice to have less spectacularly shitty frees," Sirius complained.

"Free after Charms," Remus said smugly.

"How the fuck, you're taking more subjects than me that's not fair!"

"Don't start you two – Pete, what've you got?" James cut in.

"I'm only free last thing," he said sadly.

"Ah, bad luck mate."

Further down the Gryffindor table, Lily was eating her toast in peace. Or at least, she was until Marlene and Elizabeth sat down opposite her, loudly comparing timetables.

"Are you okay Lily?" Marlene asked innocently.

"… Yes, why wouldn't I be?"

"Well, there's no Potions today, and we know how you pine- hey! You're supposed to be setting a good example!" Marlene laughed, flicking the dry cereal that Lily had thrown out of her hair.

"Do you think they put Muggle Studies and Divination together at the end of the day just to torture the people who take them because they think it's a skive?" Elizabeth asked.

"I mean, they're not wrong. I'm predicted at least an Exceeds Expectations and I handed in about two essays last year," Marlene pointed out.

"Well, that probably did exceed their expectations if they know you," said Elizabeth. Marlene made a rude hand gesture in response.

"We'd better get going if we want to get our books before class though, it's nearly half eight." Lily stood up, retrieving her bag from under the table. "Also, is Jenny even awake yet?"

* * *

Sirius arrived at Transfiguration just as the start of class bell rang, shooting a winning smile at Professor McGonagall, who ignored him and promptly launched into her start of year speech.

"As I'm sure you are all well aware by now, your final N.E.W.T. year is incredibly important to your futures. You are all fully capable of achieving at least an Acceptable at the end of this year, but exams are just nine months away and there is a lot of work to be done. Today we will be working on one of the most difficult N.E.W.T. level topics to give you time to practice sufficiently: major human transfiguration. I do not think I need to tell you how dangerous this potentially is, and we will spend the first hour working on the theory covered in chapter nine of your textbook, which you have of course all read over the holidays as I requested. Can anyone tell me the three principles of human transfiguration?"

The four Marauders exchanged looks. Peter was almost vibrating with excitement at the thought of doing well in classes – becoming illegal Animagi over the course of their third and fourth years gave them an awful lot of experience with human transfiguration.

They left the class two hours later, bypassing the queue for Professor McGonagall to remove some of the more interesting extra protrusions that their classmates had developed (the back of Sirius' head had a few interesting lumps, but those were intentional on James' part and no one really felt like telling him).

* * *

The Gryffindor common room that evening was full of loud younger years, looking forwards to the weekend and excited from the start of term. James pinned the Quidditch try-outs notice next to a poster reminding them about curfew times, and went to join his friends.

"This is ridiculous. I swear we have more homework already than in the last six years combined." Sirius was trying to read Remus' Charms homework upside down across the table with little success. "And Moony is making me do it on a Friday night Prongs, tell him how wrong that is!"

"The more we do now, the less we do on the weekend, and I'm not _making_ you do anything!"

"I swear we have this exact conversation every year. OI, MARLENE!" James shouted suddenly. Marlene, who had just emerged from the girls' dorm, made her way across the common room towards him, Lily and Jenny trailing after her.

"Try-outs a week tomorrow, I want the whole team there. We need a new beater, and a replacement chaser after that bloody dick decided he wants to focus on his exams – no skipping McKinnon, I can't find a chaser without a keeper to test them on."

"Why do I have to come then? Am I supposed to just fly around and pretend to look for the snitch as a distraction?" Sirius whined as Marlene elbowed him over on the sofa.

"Team spirit, you'll be there or you'll be gone," James said firmly.

Lily joined Remus on the other sofa, pulling out her own Charms essay and textbook. They worked in silence for a few minutes until Sirius interrupted.

"You know Lily, your handwriting is much nicer than Remus'"

"Thank- Hey, no, I've been working on this all afternoon, do your own!"

* * *

 **Saturday 10** **th** **September 1977**

The second Saturday of term dawned bright and sunny. James got up early, dressed, and headed down to the Great Hall for breakfast. To his surprise, he spotted Lily already at the Gryffindor table, alone.

"Morning Evans, what has you up this early?" he asked, sliding onto the bench opposite her. Lily looked up from her coffee and blinked in surprise.

"… Please don't speak to me before ten am."

"You realise it's a Saturday right, you don't actually need to be awake yet," James pointed out. Lily looked tired, he realised belatedly.

"I had Prefect duty last night. One vomiting fourth year, three minor incidents in the library corridor, and a homesick first year. Some of us have not had the luxury of sleep yet Potter."

James shot a pointed look at her coffee "Why aren't you sleeping now then?"

"Four pages of Herbology questions, two feet of Transfiguration, one chapter of Charms reading, Arithmancy number chart," Lily listed off.

"You seem remarkably awake."

"This is my fourth cup. What are you doing up anyway?" Lily absentmindedly added two sugar cubes to her current coffee before downing it.

"Quidditch try-outs! I have big plans this year Evans, big plans."

"Oh fuck. Right, the library awaits, I'll see you at tonight's Prefect meeting."

James stared after her for a moment, shaking his head. He was still lost in his thoughts when he was joined by Marlene. The hall slowly filled as they went over the new tactics for the season.

"We need some younger people – three of the team are graduating this year, and that's captain, seeker and chaser, everyone else is a sixth year, our whole team will be knocked out in a few years if we don't recruit a few third or fourth years at least and get them up to scratch before we leave," James argued.

"But if they're not good enough already then we just throw away this year's victory!" Marlene gestured wildly with her fork.

"Maybe you should just wait and see, since you don't even know who's going to try out yet," Remus pointed out, sitting down next to them and buttering some toast.

"Maybe we should go and see, since we're starting in fifteen minutes and Sirius is over by the doors," said James.

Remus excused himself to head to the library, and the others headed down the Quidditch pitch where a small crowd was building at the feet of the goalposts at one end.

"Alright everyone, listen up!" James shouted "We're looking for a beater and a chaser, so if you don't want to play one of those then go now or feel free to fly for substitute positions. We'll start off by splitting you into smaller groups and flying a few laps to see how you handle a broomstick – so if you don't have your own, go grab one from the shed now and let's get going!"

* * *

A stack of books dropped onto the other side of Lily's table and she jerked awake with a start, looking up to see Remus with an amused expression on his face.

"You're supposed to be the nice one," she complained sleepily.

"Sorry, someone misinformed you. Tired?" he sat down and pulled a quill, ink and parchment from his bag.

"Homesick first year in the common room when I got back late from patrolling, didn't seem worth going to bed once I was done with that."

"Ah. And now there's too much work," Remus said sympathetically.

"Mountains, if this is only the first proper week I don't know how we're going to make it through the year."

"I'll do you a deal – finish that essay and I'll sneak us some good coffee."

"Marry me," Lily sighed dramatically.

"Don't let James head you say that," Remus laughed, flipping open his Ancient Runes textbook. Lily laughed as well, and then stopped. She'd been trying to put her finger on what was off about James' behaviour all week, and here it was – he hadn't asked her out once, or flirted with her really, even as a joke. Was he planning something bigger, lulling everyone into a false sense of security?

Lily dismissed these thoughts as paranoia and forced her attention back onto her Transfiguration essay. The two of them worked mostly in silence for the rest of the morning, Remus occasionally nudging Lily to keep her awake and Lily questioning him on human transfiguration.

"Done!" Lily cried victoriously, earning a sharp look from the passing librarian "Two feet, one and a quarter inches."

"Well done," Remus muttered, buried in his translation.

"Pretty sure you promised me coffee," Lily yawned "I won't get this Arithmancy chart done without it, and you wouldn't want to be responsible for Professor Vector murdering me, would you?"

"… Fine, I'll be twenty minutes – don't fall asleep while I'm gone." Remus disappeared around the corner of the nearest bookshelf. Lily stood and stretched, and started returning some of the many Transfiguration textbooks spread over her desk. With no work to distract her, she kept returning to the question of James. Why was he acting so… un Potter-like? Obviously she preferred him not asking her out every time he saw her, it wasn't like she would ever say yes and he drove her mad, but a non-irritating James was… confusing.

Lily's thoughts were interrupted by Remus clearing his throat behind her.

"Well, you aren't sleeping, but I'm pretty sure the floor isn't that fascinating."

"Shut up, I'm tired." Lily stuck her tongue out. He rolled his eyes and gestured towards their table, where two large mugs of coffee sat.

"How did you even get those in here, Madam Pince will have your head if she catches us." Lily sipped her coffee, smiling.

"Marauder secrets – more than my life is worth to tell you," Remus grinned, returning to his seat.

* * *

James was waiting outside the empty classroom that they had claimed for Prefect meetings when Lily and Remus arrived, lauhing and nudging one another all the way down the corridor.

"Everything all right?" James asked, raising his eyebrows at Lily as she slid down the wall onto the floor, laughing so hard she was crying.

"Yeah… I'm cutting you off of the caffeine, those last two cups were probably a bad idea," Remus got out, still laughing.

"Caffeine is never a bad idea. Never," Lily said seriously, and then ruined the effect by bursting out laughing again.

"Okay then?" James opened the door and headed in as Remus lent Lily a hand, pulling her upright again. It was stupid to be jealous of the fact that Remus was actually friends with Lily, that they laughed together and spent time together, completely and utterly stupid. They'd been friendly for years, and James had only been behaving himself for a week or so, what did he expect?

By the time all the Prefects had arrived Lily was considerably calmer.

"Right, we'll try and make this quick because let's face it, we've all got better things to be doing-" Lily kicked James under the desk "- but there's a few things we have to get through."

"First, we have to pick Hogsmeade weekend dates for the term to pass on to the staff. This is pretty straightforward, we just do the same every year – middle of October, last weekend before Christmas," Lily took over, digging notes out of her bag.

"Second, this year we have the Christmas ball – we need volunteers to plan and organise it, preferably people who aren't doing N.E.W.T.s this year. If you're interested then let James know at the end and he'll give you more details."

"On a more serious note, Prefect powers are to be used responsibly, any sign of abuse and your position can be taken away. Some people could do with remembering this," James spoke up while Lily was yawning. "And on a considerably less serious note, the new bathroom password is eucalyptus, if comes into effect at midnight tomorrow."

"Right, we'll leave it there for tonight, unless anyone has any issues with the patrol rota… no?"

The room broke up slowly, some lingering to discuss the Christmas ball excitedly – it only took place every other year, and the last one had apparently been a night to remember. Lily had snuck out straight after the dinner once everyone was distracted and spent the night sitting in an empty corridor with Severus, talking and laughing and playing games until well after the ball had officially ended. They had traded stories and hopes and memories of when they were nine and everything had been so simple, and Lily had thought that they could fix everything that was changing between them. It had been one of the last real good times they'd had together – Severus spent more and more time with Avery and Mulciber and their lot, and they didn't keep their dislike of Muggleborns secret. And then…

"Knut for your thoughts?" Lily looked up, startled. James had broken away from the ball conversation and was standing in front of her; in fact, the room was nearly empty.

"Just really, really ready for sleep," she said, standing up. They walked back to Gryffindor Tower mostly in silence, where Lily headed straight for the girls' dormitory with a quick goodnight.

* * *

A/N: I'm crossposting this here from AO3 (after a long hiatus from ffn on a different profile, I ended up reading something here and figured I should), so if you're feeling impatient head over there for the 100% up to date version. If you'd rather enjoy a regularly updating fic, stick here! I'm aiming to upload a chapter here once a fortnight until I run out.

On the subject of the actual fic... I wrote most of this over the course of two Camp NaNoWriMos, for a bit of fun. The working title was "Obligatory seventh year Marauders fic", and that probably tells you everything you need to know :p


	2. September 1977 (II)

**Tuesday 13** **th** **September 1977**

"Come on, we've got double Potions, wouldn't want to be late for that," Marlene sighed, swallowing the last of her lunch. Jenny laughed.

"See, if you'd dropped Potions like a sensible person you would be free for the rest of the day."

"Why on earth would anyone want to drop Potions, back me up Eliza," Lily dropped her copy of Advanced Potion Making into her cauldron.

"Not a chance, we're all insane and Jenny had the right idea, this is going to be a disaster."

They made their way down to the dungeons carrying their cauldrons full of ingredients and equipment and took their usual seats.

"Good afternoon everyone, as I said last week we're going to try and brew Felix Felicis today, since we need a whole six months for it to stew. I don't expect many of you to produce a successful result," Professor Slughorn looked pointedly at Lily and Severus, on opposite sides of the room "as it is notoriously tricky to get right. You all know where the ingredients are by now, so off you go!"

The initial burst of conversation faded into silence as the class settled down to work. Lily let herself get lost in potion making, lighting the fire under her cauldron and carefully grating frozen ashwinder egg (even the tiniest bit of finger would ruin the whole thing). Two hours passed in a blur of juicing and chopping and stirring precisely. By the end her potion was only a shade or two off from the expected silver, but far better than most around her (there were a fair few dull greys, and she spotted greenish smoke coming out of Peter's cauldron).

"Excellent, excellent Lily my dear!" Professor Slughorn exclaimed over her cauldron as she turned down the heat and performed the final incantation, waving her wand in a figure of eight over the surface of the potion.

"Time is up everyone, make sure you decrease the heat and step away from your cauldrons. We'll be moving lessons to the next room along until brewing is finished on these, but don't forget to check in to see how it's doing – I won't be reminding you! And I don't think I need to tell you that most of these potions won't be drinkable, so don't even think about taking some – we don't want anyone in the hospital wing, Madam Pomfrey would be most upset with me!" Professor Slughorn dismissed them and there was the usual rush for the exits. Lily was annoyed to see that Severus' potion was much shinier than hers as she made her way over to where the Marauders were packing up.

"Hey, Remus, are you going to Slughorn's dinner on Friday?"

"Depends how late it runs, we have duty from nine remember," Remus looked up from his pale grey potion.

"Ah shit yeah, dinner isn't until half seven, we'll never get away."

"You can go if you want, I'll be fine on my own," he offered. Lily winced at the idea of spending an evening avoiding eye contact with Severus over the dinner table with no one to talk to.

"I can cover it," James offered, to Lily's surprise.

"I- you don't have to, the dinner really isn't that exciting," she said.

"Is our Head Boy actually offering to do his job?" Sirius gasped in fake shock "I'd take it Lily, offers like this don't come along every day."

"Actually, it would be nice James, if you really don't mind?" Remus spoke up.

"All sorted then, Remus, you shall go to the ball!"

"… Was that a Cinderella reference?" Lily stared at James in confusion.

"Ah, my fault, I made them watch Muggle films with me for my Muggle Studies O.W.L.," Remus explained as they left the dungeon.

* * *

"Whatever you do, don't ask James how practice went," a very muddy and exhausted looking Sirius dropped onto the sofa next to Remus, who pulled a face at the mess and picked up his wand.

" _Tergeo_ ," he muttered, siphoning off some of the mud and water.

"This is why I love you Moony," Sirius went a little red and hastily continued "But seriously, don't say anything to James."

"How bad was it?"

"Complete disaster. It's just because it's the first practice, new people flying together, nothing is actually wrong, but you know him."

"Ah. Where is he?" Remus asked.

"In the showers, probably trying to drown himself or something." Sirius shrugged.

"And you thought you wouldn't bother showering why, exactly?"

"I thought warning you was worth the sacrifice of a little mud, and because I always smell wonderful."

"Yeah, no, that's definitely not true."

"… Why does everyone think you're the nice one?" Sirius shook his head.

At that moment James emerged from the portrait hole and went up to the boys' dormitory without a word. A second later he came back down the stairs with his homework, slamming a book down on the table and silently glaring at it. Remus and Sirius exchanged looks, but before they could say anything they were joined by Lily.

"Do you have a minute to talk about the ball, have you got people sorted for it yet?"

"No," James replied shortly, not looking up from his textbook. Lily's face quickly changed from polite Prefect business to fuck you Potter (an expression very familiar to them all from the previous six years at Hogwarts). Sirius shook his head violently, eyes wide.

"No, you don't have a minute, or no, nothing is sorted? Because I distinctly remember at least ten people talking to you about it after the meeting."

"No, I don't care, let me get this work done Evans," James still didn't look at anyone. Lily opened her mouth to retort angrily, and Remus quickly interrupted.

"Hey, Lily, have you started the Arithmancy problems yet?" Sirius snorted and muttered something that might have been 'smooth'.

"I did the first few; need a book from the library for the rest I think."

"Same, we should go now," Remus stood up.

"What – right now?"

"Yes, now, let's go," Remus ushered her out of the common room. Sirius sighed and pulled his own homework towards him.

"I thought your grand master plan this year was to behave and be nice to Lily?" he asked.

"Piss off."

* * *

"What is his problem all of a sudden," Lily fumed as they walked down the stairs towards the library.

"You say this like you always get along so well. But there was a bit of a disaster with Quidditch practice or something," Remus said, hopping over the trick step halfway down.

"Well that wasn't exactly 'go out with me Evans' was it? And seriously, it's just a game."

"He's the captain, they haven't had a win in a few years, it's a lot of pressure for him, especially with N.E.W.T.s. Be nice Lily, they all love that game."

They fell silent as they entered the library and walked past Madam Pince's desk, before Remus resumed in a whisper.

"And anyway, was that a touch of longing I heard there? Does Lily Evans secretly maybe miss James Potter pursuing her every waking hour?" Lily made an indignant squawking noise.

"I do NOT miss Potter asking me out every five minutes because he thinks it's funny," she whisper-shouted. An odd look crossed Remus' face.

"Is that what you think?"

"What's that supposed to mean?" Lily hissed, reaching for the right book.

"Never mind. Anyway, it's probably safe to go back now."

"Are you kidding me, we walked all the way down here, I'm doing my Arithmancy homework."

"I still haven't done tomorrows translation for Runes, I'm supposed to do it with James," Remus said apologetically.

"You're the one who dragged me down here!"

"To save you from a row with James – you're welcome!" he called back, heading towards the door. Lily waved after him and settled down to work.

* * *

When Remus got back to the common room James seemed considerably more cheerful. They worked on Ancient Runes for twenty minutes or so before Remus couldn't keep quiet any longer.

"Did Lily ever give any sign of, you know, thinking you were serious about asking her out?"

"What?"

"Last year. Or the year before, or the year before that, or-"

"Alright, alright. Why wouldn't she think I was serious, I asked her every day some weeks!"

"… Because you asked her every day?"

"Wait, did she say something?" James put his quill down, turning his full attention to Remus.

"Well..."

"Spill, Moony."

"She thinks you did it because you thought it was funny. Or something," Remus let out in a rush.

"She what?"

"I mean, you have to admit that it make sense from her point of view…"

James went quiet for a bit, and Remus' quill scratched at his parchment as he translated the second paragraph.

"Do you think I should explain?" he asked a little later.

"Most definitely not, she'll know I told you!"

"But this is an emergency Moony, if she thinks I've been screwing with her for six years my brilliant plan doesn't stand a chance!"

"If you go up to her and have an awkward conversation about how you really actually are in love with her then you won't stand a chance," Remus corrected him "Forget I said anything Prongs, and keep translating or we'll never finish."

"But-" James started.

"There are no 'but's in this paragraph."

James sighed and re-inked his quill.

* * *

On her way back from the library, Lily's mind returned to her conversation with Remus (and why did she keep having James related revelations in the library? Actually, why did she keep having James related revelations, she didn't even think about him that much. Except for when she was mad at him – all of the past six years – or confused – all of this one, so far – okay, maybe she did think about him a fair bit, but it didn't mean anything other than that he was a bit annoying and around a lot).

When she got back to the girls' dormitory Marlene, Jenny and Elizabeth were all sitting on their beds relaxing. Marlene was examining the sports section of the Daily Prophet with a red biro (nicked from Lily) tucked behind one ear, Elizabeth was painting her nails and Jenny was reading.

"So I was talking to Remus in the library," Lily began, lying back on her bed and staring at the canopy. Marlene wolf whistled without looking up from the Quidditch results. "Very funny, but no. He said something that… well, do you think Potter was maybe not joking every single time he asked me out?"

The others all looked up slowly. Marlene set her paper aside, and Jenny shut her book.

"Please tell me you're kidding," Elizabeth said, staring.

"Why would I be joking about this, he was so obviously not serious-" Marlene snorted "- why are you all looking at me like that?"

"How have we gone so long without having this conversation?" Jenny asked, shaking her head.

"Probably because we thought that it was obvious, and no one in their right mind would have failed to realise what was going on, and we all assumed that you didn't want to date him and were just annoyed because he couldn't take no for an answer," Elizabeth pointed out.

"I didn't want to date him! What are you all talking about?" Lily protested.

"Not that you said an actual 'no' all that often. 'Go to hell' and 'fuck off' and 'you're an arrogant toerag Potter, no one in their right mind would date you' made plenty of appearances though," Marlene said thoughtfully. Lily buried her face in the pillow.

"Just give me a straight answer," she said, voice muffled.

"I can't believe I actually have to say this, but has it ever crossed your mind that James Potter is actually madly in love with you and that's why he never gives up?"

"Exactly what Eliza said, yes," Marlene nodded "You seem a little freaked out Lily, everything okay over there?"

"The last six years of my life have been a lie Marley, what do you think?"

"I think you're a drama queen, come on. Does it really change anything? I mean, unless… unless you _like_ him?"

"I do not like James Potter how many time do I have to say this," Lily automatically responded "But obviously it changes things! I was horrible to him, oh god, I was awful because I thought he was just mocking me, will you stop laughing at me Eliza!"

"I don't know what I expected from tonight but this definitely wasn't it," Eliza said, still laughing.

"Calm down Lily, I'm pretty sure James doesn't think you're awful," Jenny got up and joined Lily on her bed, patting her on the shoulder.

"Well clearly he does, since he stopped asking me out!" she snapped. There was a moment of silence.

"And again, I ask… Are you really really sure you don't like him?" Marlene raised her eyebrows expectantly.

"And again, I say no. Fuck, I should apologise and explain or something…" There was a nearly unanimous chorus of 'no's. "Why not? I was mean, I should say sorry, it's not rocket science!"

"I'm not even going to ask what rocket science is." Marlene poked Jenny and Lily over until there was space on the bed. "But if he's getting over it, then going over and saying you misunderstood him all of this time is pretty much just giving him false hope. Put it behind you, you've been getting on okay so far this year already, and maybe you'll be friends, if that's all you want."

Lily sighed and chose to ignore the last point. "I guess… fuck."

"Fuck indeed."

* * *

 **Friday 16** **th** **September 1977**

Somehow, Lily managed to mostly avoid James for the next few days. She didn't know how exactly to react to her new discovery, or how she'd missed this for so long. She felt like a bit of an idiot really.

"Hey," a voice came from behind her as she waited outside the Transfiguration classroom and Lily jumped.

"Hi – are you sure you're still okay to cover mine and Remus' duty tonight?" She didn't quite meet James' eyes as she spoke.

"Yeah, it's totally fine – look, I just wanted to say sorry for snapping the other day. I was tired-" the bell rang and people started walking past them into the classroom.

"It's okay, forget about it," Lily said, heading for her seat. James followed her, still talking.

"We've got a group sorted for the ball, they have all the information and some really good ideas, the whole thing is under control and you have nothing to worry about."

"If everyone can take their seats, I will start by collecting everyone's essays," Professor McGonagall was standing at the front of the room, staring pointedly at James.

* * *

"Well don't you look smart," Lily joined Remus and the other Marauders in the common room, where James and Peter were mocking Remus. James tried his hardest not to stare at the sight of Lily in a dress rather than her usual school robes, and failed to notice Sirius doing the same with Remus.

"Well don't you say that every time we go to one of these things," Remus stood up "Off we go then, I'm starving. I hope there's chocolate pudding."

It was a small dinner tonight, a handful of students and Professor Slughorn sat around a table in an ostentatious room on the first floor.

"Lily my girl, and Remus! Come in, come in, you're just in time, there's a space here," Professor Slughorn called, gesturing to a pair of seats to one side of him. They sat down, and waiters seemingly sprang out of thin air holding plates of elaborate starters. Lily looked up to find Severus sitting directly across the circular table, staring at her. She dropped her gaze instantly, a mix of anger and sadness surfacing in seconds.

"So Lily, how is your Felix coming along? Checked on it yet?" Slughorn asked. Lily swallowed quickly.

"I think it's okay Professor, but didn't you say you wouldn't be reminding us?"

"Ah, you caught me there, but if I know you you'll have checked it five times! I'm sure it'll be wonderful, you're too modest my girl. Although I think Severus may have you beaten on this one, absolutely perfect my boy, never seen anything like it – this can't be your first try with Felix Felicis, surely?" Professor Slughorn beamed at them both. Lily smiled through gritted teeth, nodding.

"It is sir, thank you," said Severus.

Fortunately Slughorn was quickly distracted talking to Regulus Black (or unfortunately, given the dark looks Remus kept shooting in his direction).

"Why do I always forget how much I hate these things until we're here?" Remus whispered. Lily suppressed a laugh.

"Free wine, now we're of age?" Lily raised her glass in a mock toast.

"You know, you and Sirius would get along like a house on fire if you actually tried," Remus shook his head "And you said you'd never mention that again!"

"Mention what?" Lily said innocently, before being caught up in conversation with Professor Slughorn again.

Three hours, two helpings of chocolate cake and a painful amount of small talk later, they returned to Gryffindor Tower.

"I would say never again, but the desserts…" Remus groaned.

"You need to bet your priorities straight."

"Whatever, you just like listening to Slughorn tell you how wonderful you are all night."

"Oh piss off. I'll see you tomorrow for that Arithmancy essay?" Lily paused at the bottom of the stairs to the girls' dorm.

"Yeah, night Lily."

"Good night Remus."

* * *

 **Tuesday 27** **th** **September 1977**

The rest of September passed in a blur of work, Quidditch practice and Prefect duties for James. He spent hours writing essays, and only pulled back slightly on the Quidditch tactics when Sirius threatened to murder him in his sleep after James suggested upping practice to three times a week.

"I can't believe I'm saying this Prongs, but we have N.E.W.T.s! Even Marlene will not go through with this!"

James frowned down at his diagrams of chaser formations.

"Ravenclaw have a strong side this year though, we want a good win with Slytherin."

"The match isn't for a month and a half, two practices a week is plenty, if I were you I'd be thinking about tonight," Sirius pointed out.

"What's tonight?" Lily asked, sitting down on the arm of the sofa. James and Sirius looked up at her in surprise.

"Ah, if I told you Evans you'd feel like you had to do your Head Girl's duty and try and stop us."

"You're Head Boy!"

"So I won't be breaking curfew with whatever it is we're doing," James grinned.

"You don't _have_ a curfew!"

"My point exactly."

"Anyway, to what do we owe the pleasure of your company on this fine evening?" Sirius asked, rolling up his homework.

"Oh, I have Arithmancy notes for Remus – is he alright?"

"He's just a bit ill, Madam Pomfrey will let him out in a day or two, don't worry," James took the notes from her "I'm sure these will cheer him up though."

"You say that like it's a joke," Sirius remarked.

"True, maybe we should save these for when he's recovered; they might excite him too much. Is it time for dinner yet?" James began packing his work away.

"Yeah, we'd better find Pete and get going – you coming?"

"Sure, unless you know where Eliza is?" Lily looked around the common room.

"You break my heart Evans, aren't we good enough for you?" Sirius clutched at his chest and she laughed.

"Not unless you have my star chart, no."

"Is our darling Head Girl – no, no, it can't be, you can't possibly be cheating!"

"Shut up Sirius, she spilt something on hers. Are we going to dinner or not?"

* * *

Lily was curled up on one of the window seats in the Gryffindor common room with her Astronomy homework late that night when Sirius, James and Peter came creeping down the stairs from the boys' dormitory. They glanced around the room, but failed to see Lily sitting in the shadows where she'd extinguished the candles to see outside better. She quietly set her full moon sketches down on the seat next to her and watched them climb through the portrait hole. This wasn't the first time she'd seen them sneaking out like this, coming back from duty alone or late at night when she couldn't sleep over the last few years. She'd yet to find an explanation for this uncharacteristic behaviour that didn't seem to result in any pranks or other shenanigans… well, not a likely one, anyway.

She shook her head, standing and stretching away the stiffness from sitting and working all night. If she didn't go to bed now there was no chance of waking up in time for breakfast. Lily climbed the stairs to the girls' dormitory, changed and got into bed without looking out of the window again – so she missed seeing three dark figures making their way along the edge of the Forbidden Forest.

* * *

 **Saturday 1** **st** **October 1977**

October started as it meant to go on: cold, wet and miserable. But magical fires warmed the library, and Lily had claimed a table deep in the maze of bookshelves where she couldn't even hear the rain hitting the windows. She was idly doodling in the margins of the revision plan she was supposed to be making, when Remus joined her.

"Hey, you don't look so good still, are you sure you're okay?" It was true – he was pale and tired looking, deep shadows under his eyes.

"Nothing a bit of sleep won't fix," Remus sat down opposite her and started spreading out his own work.

"We can move closer to a fire if you want or something, you're ill so much, you need to take better care of yourself," Lily continued, looking worried.

"I'm fine, really – look, can we talk about something else, I really don't want to remember how many times I threw up this week."

"Okay, how are things with Sirius?" Lily asked, unfazed. Remus choked on thin air.

"I'm sorry, what?"

"You heard me."

"I take it back, so I was sick nine times-"

"Oh no, you had your chance to let me be the concerned friend, now we're talking about your pining and what you're going to do about it," said Lily.

"I do not pine!"

"You're blushing."

"I do not blush!" Remus buried his face in his hands "Can we do that Potions work now?"

Lily relented, and started filling him in on everything he'd missed as they worked on their essays.

"How's your Felix going?"

"Not as well as yours, I'd guess, but it does look like it's starting to turn gold at least," Remus scratched out a few lines with his quill and sighed "I'm more concerned about this essay for the potion I missed; I'll never know how you're supposed to write these things without just copying out the instructions."

"Mhm," Lily was already on her third side of parchment. They worked in silence for a little longer before Remus spoke up again.

"He was acting really weird this summer." Lily didn't bother pretending not to know who he was talking about.

"Weird how?"

"I don't know, just weird. Touching more than usual, being unexpectedly nice… It sounds stupid. Someone even sent me flowers and I'm eighty percent sure it was him and I can't figure out what the joke is."

"You realise you just described Sirius' flirting right?"

"This coming from the girl who only realised James was serious about two weeks ago."

"Piss off, you don't have any proof of that!"

"Marlene told Sirius."

"Do I have any secrets?!"

"Probably not. I would say I'm sorry, but the show that is you and James keeps us all entertained."

"You're a cruel man Lupin. But really, has it ever crossed your mind that Sirius maybe likes you?" Lily asked, looking something up in Advanced Potion Making.

"No?!"

"Well, maybe you should think about that."

"He stopped, anyway. So even if you were right – and you can't be – it doesn't really matter anymore," the last few words came out slightly sadder than Remus had intended.

"Did you ever do anything to tell him how you felt?"

"I've been keeping this quiet for four years, what do you think?"

"Four years? Well that explains a lot," Lily said mostly to herself "But do you think that might be why he stopped?"

"How do you know all these things, when did you last go on a date even," Remus protested.

"This is literally common sense Remus, but have you really forgotten last year already?"

"Oh shit yeah. We couldn't mention your name to James after every Hogsmeade weekend – Valentine's was spectacular," he said. Lily winced a little.

"Lily?"

"Yeah?"

"If you hadn't thought it was all a joke… I don't know, if he'd been less annoying about it… would James have had a chance?" he asked. Lily went quiet for a moment, and Remus went back to his essay/

"It's not like that was the only thing he ever did to make me dislike him. Hexing my best friend every chance he got didn't exactly inspire good feelings, and you have to admit he was an arrogant prick mostly," she pointed out.

"That's not a no."

"Well it's definitely not a yes! Why is my past hypothetical love life more interesting than your present actual one?"

"He doesn't like me!"

"Whatever you say."

* * *

Dinner that night was particularly loud, as it sometimes was when the Marauders were around. James had put up the date of the first Hogsmeade weekend in Gryffindor common room that afternoon, and further down the table the third years were buzzing with excitement. Peter and Sirius seemed to be plotting something, and were glancing over at a group of sixth years at the Ravenclaw table every now and then.

"Who's planning to go to Hogsmeade then?" Marlene asked, elbowing Sirius across and sitting down opposite Lily.

"That's two weeks away still, and we've been about a million times, "Jenny complained.

"Depends how much work we have," Elizabeth said gloomily.

"Excellent, I have a date and I don't want any of you fuckers crashing it," Marlene said cheerfully.

"Oh well in that case, I'm sure we can get free for an hour or two," Lily grinned "Can't we Eliza?"

"Who's the guy?" Sirius asked, looking up from his conversation with Peter.

"That cute beater from Hufflepuff. His opinions on Quidditch are all totally wrong of course, but I'm sure he can change."

"What, that Christopher guy?" Sirius raised an eyebrow.

"I said the cute one Sirius, why are you so interested?"

"Can't have you losing focus can we, not with the Quidditch season so close, James would have your head." Lily and Jenny snorted – the idea of Marlene losing focus on Quidditch was unimaginable. Remus was watching the exchange with a slightly uncomfortable expression, and gave Lily an 'I told you so' look. She rolled her eyes in response.

"Sure you aren't jealous Black?" Marlene asked sweetly, teasing.

"Well he is rather cute," Sirius smirked.

"Are you done?" Remus said suddenly "Eating, I mean," he added a second later.

"Sure?" Sirius said, looking confused. Remus grasped for the first thing that came into his head.

"Ah, we could do that History of Magic stuff tonight, if that's still okay with you?"

"Yeah, now?"

"That wold be good," Remus nodded, and the rest of the group watched them leave. As soon as they passed the doors into the Entrance Hall Lily turned back to Marlene.

"Nicely done," she observed.

"Why thank you. Now, has anyone seen Patrick? I should probably ask him on this date."

"I'm not sure they would notice if you didn't to be honest," Jenny said.

"Nonsense, I have to keep the story up," Marlene winked and made her way over to a group of sixth year Hufflepuffs. Elizabeth shook her head in disbelief.

"How did you two know that Sirius would play along so well?"

"He's predictable, or so Marlene says anyway."

"What just happened?" Peter asked, looking completely bewildered.

"You know Pete, I'm really not sure," James said.

* * *

Remus and Sirius made their way to the library in oddly strained silence.

Sirius was wrapped up in thinking about Remus' awkward interruption, and could it have possibly meant… but no, clearly he was just stressed about the N.E.W.T. work he had to keep up with, or some other explanation. He would have said something, done something the whole summer that Sirius had been flirting with him if he felt at all the same way. Don't be ridiculous, Sirius told himself.

Meanwhile Remus was just swearing at himself repeatedly for being a complete idiot.

"Do you like Marlene?" he blurted out suddenly. They came to a near standstill in the corridor. Sirius carefully chose the most neutral answer he could find, because what the fuck?

"Of course I like Marlene, she's one of my best friends." The 'after you guys' went without saying.

"I didn't mean – oh, forget it," Remus started walking again.

"No, tell me," Sirius demanded, not moving.

"I meant… do you really like her. Like like," Remus muttered awkwardly. To his surprise, Sirius burst out laughing.

"Like like? Are you twelve Moony? Why would you even think that?"

"Well, you seemed pretty jealous just now."

"And you've known I was gay since we were what, fourteen? How daft can you be," Sirius shook his head.

"Shit. Sorry. I'm an idiot, aren't I?"

"Just a bit. I was joking with Marley, Remus… and honestly, if anyone was seeming jealous tonight it was you," the words were out of Sirius' mouth before he could stop himself, and all of a sudden he was very certain he wasn't imagining things.

"I'm pretty sure Prongs was going to strangle Will when he was talking to Lily earlier," Remus offered, laughing weakly.

"Oh no, don't you wriggle out of this, I want to know what that was, Remus," Sirius said firmly, looking straight at him. Remus looked down, refusing to meet his eyes. "Why did it bother you so much that I might like Marlene?"

"Why do you care?"

"I think I made that obvious this summer!" Sirius raised his voice.

"Well clearly not, or else we wouldn't be having this conversation!" Remus shouted back. They stared at each other for a few moments, standing inches apart. Sirius was the one to break the silence, talking more quietly again.

"Look, I get it, I clearly misunderstood before. Maybe we should do this some other-"

Kissing Sirius was not exactly like Remus had expected, but he had never kissed anyone at all so this wasn't really surprising. There was a moment where Sirius stayed frozen, unresponsive, and Remus nearly pulled away, but then Sirius was kissing him back and –

And one of the ruder ghosts passed straight through them, making them both jump and remember that they were standing in a corridor. They wore matching expressions, both of them trying very hard not to smile like an idiot and completely failing.

"So, History of Magic?" Sirius asked after a second.

* * *

A/N: I know I said once a fortnight, but then I realised that I have an approaching 20 chapter backlog to get through, so once a week it it!


	3. October 1977 (I)

**Monday 3** **rd** **October 1977**

Sirius and Remus didn't tell anybody about what had happened outside the library on Saturday night. They didn't even really talk about it, just stole moments to make out – between the shelves while Peter and James studies on the other side of the bookcase in the library, on the stairs to the boys' dormitory before bed, in hidden corridors between lessons. The whole thing felt like it might break if anyone looked it too hard. Remus had wanted this for so long, and convinced himself that he could never have it…

"Remus?" Lily waved a hand in front of his face and he jumped.

"Sorry, distracted… did you say something?" He tried not to look too guilty.

"Just wondering if you'd done question seven yet," she tapped the Arithmancy questions lying open on the desk, and he turned his attention back to their work.

"You've been very out of it the past few days, everything alright?" Lily asked as they left the library for dinner.

"Yeah, just lots of work." He reminded himself that no one their age was actually a capable Legilimens, and so no one could tell just by looking at him, but no matter how much he reasoned with himself he couldn't shake the feeling that everyone knew what was going on somehow.

Everyone else was already at dinner when they arrived, in the middle of yet another Quidditch conversation, although Remus thought conversation might be too polite a word for the enthusiastic shouting coming from the middle of the Gryffindor table.

"We haven't even played a match yet, what are they on about?" Remus asked as they sat down.

"Oh it's the League, not Hogwarts Quidditch. Some team that usually loses almost every match beat one of the favourites for the season, I can't tell if they're excited or angry about it," Elizabeth explained, rescuing a jug of pumpkin juice from James' arm waving. "How are things with you Remus?"

"FUCK, this changes all the guesses for our World Cup team," Marlene swore violently next to her.

"I'm go-" Sirius caught Remus' hand under the table, stopping him mid word "- good, great, yes." Lily gave him an odd look. Next to him, Sirius was still loudly debating Quidditch, jabbing at the copy of the Daily Prophet sports section spread in front of them and giving absolutely no sign that he was secretly holding hands under the table. Remus took a second to reflect on how ridiculous it was that he was getting worked up about this like he was thirteen or something, but he couldn't stop himself from smiling a bit.

Lily was still looking at him suspiciously, so he let go of Sirius' hand and turned his full attention back to the non Quidditch half of the conversation. Or he tried to anyway. Sirius' hand was now on his knee and honestly _Sirius Black's hand was resting on his knee_ what was his life coming to.

Dinner passed in a blur. They claimed the good seats by the fire in the common room, and Sirius couldn't actually touch him here but he kept _looking_ at him and somehow this was twenty times worse. Remus made his excuses early, headed up to their dorm and opened a book.

He only had to wait ten minutes before the door opened and Sirius walked in.

"Did you just blush and stammer all the way through dinner because I held your hand?" was the first thing out of his mouth.

"I do not blush!"

"You are adorable. The absolute cutest thing in the world. It is you," Sirius laughed at Remus as the door opened again.

"Alright Pete – you haven't left James and Lily unchaperoned have you?" Sirius asked.

"No, Marlene's still down there," Peter said, hunting for his pyjamas.

"Well, we'll probably hear it if they blow up the common room," Sirius shrugged.

* * *

 **Friday 7** **th** **October 1977**

The bubble of happiness that had settled in Remus' ribcage lasted almost a week before all of a sudden, it burst.

"Does anyone know the next full moon date?" James asked casually one evening on their way to the kitchens.

"Twenty seventh again I think – it's a Thursday, anyway," Sirius replied absentmindedly, already thinking of food. Remus felt as though a lead weight had dropped into his stomach. The airy, can't stop smiling, 'Sirius likes me back' feeling vanished in an instant. He followed them into the kitchen, enthusiasm gone.

Somehow, in the past few days Remus had – not forgotten, exactly, but not really registered the fact that he was a werewolf. He was dangerous.

"Would sir like a chocolate éclair?" a voice squeaked from under the platter of pastries next to his knees.

"Ah, no, thank you," Remus said distractedly. There was a gasp of horror from Sirius.

"Did Moony just turn down something with chocolate on?" he said in a disbelieving tone.

"I'm not hungry."

"Bullshit, can we get some of those for later please?" Sirius asked the house elf. James was already holding an entire treacle tart.

"Is there any of that swiss roll left over from lunch?" Peter asked hopefully, the pockets of his robes already full of cakes.

The Marauders left the kitchen ten minutes later and headed back to Gryffindor tower carrying enough food for a feast, taking over one corner of the common room for a violent game of Exploding Snap.

"Ow!"

"Victory is mine!" Sirius shouted gleefully.

"I'm going to get my self-shuffling pack, you're cheating!" Peter rubbed at his fingers where the cards had exploded.

"Champions don't need to cheat Wormy, I'm just that good," Sirius called after Peter as he disappeared up the stairs to the boys' dormitory.

"You're studying with Lily again tomorrow, right Moony?" James asked, leaning back as the two cards he had propped against one another blew up.

"Probably, why?" Remus took the pack of self-shuffling cards as Peter returned to his seat, dealing another round.

"Well I need to talk to her about Head stuff, double check some – SNAP!" There was a groan as the cards exploded again.

"Not a match Prongs, try wiping the soot off of your glasses," Sirius snorted.

"You realise that we actually work, right?" Remus laid down his next card.

"It'll only take a minute, come on," James pleaded.

"You just want to show off and look responsible by doing your job on the weekend. Can't you see her at breakfast?"

"No, then it looks like I've just remembered because I saw her instead of-" another loud bang issued from the card game "- actively seeking her out."

"Like a stalker?" Remus raised his eyebrows.

"Like a responsible Head Boy who she should be friends with!"

"You think about this way too much," Sirius muttered.

"SNAP – that's my win, fuck you Padfoot."

"Anyway, since when has friendship been your primary goal with Evans, hmm?" Sirius asked.

"Since the alternative was probably never seeing her again." Sirius 'aww'ed in response.

"You know what, as fascinating as this no doubt endless analysis of everything Lily has ever said to you this year is going to be, I think I'm going to get an early night. We've got far too much homework to do tomorrow," Sirius complained, standing and winking at Remus behind the others' backs. Remus refused to meet his eye.

"How about a game of chess, James?" he asked, turning away so he didn't have to see Sirius' face fall.

"Oh you're going down this time Moony," James grinned, pulling the board out.

Two games of chess (two nil to Remus) and a truly staggering house of cards (which defied stereotype by collapsing when the self-shuffling cards decided to shuffle just as Peter placed the final piece, rather than exploding) later, they dragged themselves up to their dorm. Sirius was in bed facing away from the door, not moving, but not breathing deeply enough to actually be asleep. Remus ignored the guilty knotted feeling in his stomach and got ready for bed. It was for the best if he avoided Sirius – they couldn't do this.

* * *

 **Saturday 8** **th** **October 1977**

Remus gave up on sleep early that morning, after a fitful nights rest interrupted by visions of Sirius, scratched and bleeding – or worse, Sirius bitten – because the werewolf didn't care who he was and berating himself for getting caught up in the whole thing and letting it get that far. He ate breakfast alone, and was working in the library for nearly two hours before Lily arrived.

"Morning," she said cheerfully "Have you started on Herbology without me?"

"Yeah, sorry, I was up early," Remus pulled his textbook closer to make space for Lily.

"I was kidding Remus, you okay?" Lily frowned. He looked even more tired than usual, she noticed, and his hair was sticking up at odd angles.

"Fine, fine, why wouldn't I be?"

Lily shrugged, and let the subject drop.

"So, does this mean you can tell me everything that I need to know about mooncalf dung?" she said hopefully.

They worked through the Herbology essay and (after glancing around to check that Madam Pince was nowhere in sight) practiced wand movements for Charms.

"I think we're probably due a break," Remus said after Lily accidentally caused red sparks to fly out of the end of her wand in frustration.

"Coffee?" Lily perked up considerably.

"You're insatiable," he laughed at her, but he was getting up to go anyway so Lily just stuck her tongue out at him. She examined the small scorch marks on the table, and wondered what the chances were of Madam Pince not noticing (probably not great). She shifted her books to cover it.

"Well don't you look guilty Evans?"

Lily jumped and turned to glare at James, who was leaning against the nearest bookshelf nonchalantly.

"No, because I haven't done anything wrong. What are you doing here anyway?" she asked.

"It's a free world, I'm allowed in the library!"

"No you aren't, actually. February last year?"

"Oh yeah, I'd forgotten about that… They lifted the ban anyway, apparently the Head Boy should be allowed in the library – and it's not like we did and _lasting_ damage," James protested "But anyway, I was actually looking for you."

"Why were you looking for me?" Lily said warily. Any member of the Marauders (other than Remus) looking for her usually spelled trouble.

"Just wanted to get you up to date on the ball stuff, and sort a date for the next Prefects' meeting?"

"Right. Okay," she said. James was looking at her expectantly still. "The ball stuff?"

"Oh, yes. You're going to love this. The theme – and it took them three weeks to decide on this, mind you – is the stunningly original Winter Wonderland. They want a decent band and the seventeen year olds to be allowed alcohol – I told them to argue that one with McGonagall themselves if they were really into hopeless cases – but all the decoration stuff seems reasonably harmless, as long as you ignore the fact that three foot long pointy icicles are basically weapons. They're pushing for complicated food rather than a set menu or buffet type thing, and every single decision causes an hour long argument and I kind of want to stab myself In the eye when they get going, why did I ever think for a second that you'd given me a nice job?" James let out a long suffering sigh and collapsed into Remus' empty chair.

"You have the job because me and Remus are doing the rounds this term," Lily thought for a moment "Okay, you should run a plan past Professor McGonagall at the end of the month before people start organising things that don't get through, and everything should be basically done by the end of November for the official decisions but it almost certainly won't be. We can go semi decent on the band – danceable, but not well known. Force them into agreeing on the buffet sometime, there's a full Christmas lunch first. And three feet pointy icicles are a staple of Hogwarts Christmas decorations, what are you talking about?"

"Oh I know your plan Evans, I can see right through you. This is the year you're finally going to off me isn't it, straight through the heart with an icicle!" James exclaimed dramatically. Lily laughed.

"Damn, you caught me Potter. I'll have to think of a new plan. Is poisoning the punch too clichéd, do you think?"

"I know you're desperate to be rid of James, but do you mind not killing all of us in the process?" Remus had returned with two mugs of coffee.

"You're all that's good in this world, I would obviously warn you," Lily assured him, taking her mug and clutching it to her chest.

"And I think that's my cue to leave," James stood.

"Prefects meeting Thursday mayb-" Lily started to suggest.

"Quidditch practice," James and Remus chorused.

"Can we do it after Hogsmeade then?"

"Sure, I'll spread the word – one last question though?"

"Yeah?"

"What are you going to do about those burn marks on the table?" James grinned, and walked off whistling. Lily swore violently.

* * *

 **Sunday 9** **th** **October 1977**

Sirius was pretty sure that he was mad. He'd spent most of a day on confused and disappointed, and an evening on sad, but now it seemed that Remus was still avoiding him. When Sirius woke up – earlier than usual, hoping to catch Remus before breakfast – his bed was empty and cold, clearly long gone. And he didn't really know how to handle being mad at one of his friends.

He stayed in bed until James woke up, and gave him about thirty seconds to adjust to the waking world before talking.

"Hypothetically speaking," he began. James groaned and rolled over. Sirius continued, undeterred "if there was someone you liked, and who you thought liked you back, and they started avoiding you… what are you supposed to take from that?"

"Can't this wait?" James mumbled into the pillow.

"No?" Sirius said in an uncharacteristically small voice. James sighed and sat up.

"Does this have anything to do with the letters you refused to show me all summer?"

"Maybe. Hypothetically." There had been nothing in those letters that wasn't perfectly platonic (at least, not the ones that Remus had sent), but he'd wanted to keep them to himself anyway for some reason.

"Well, _hypothetically_ , how sure are you that they like you back? Because maybe they just don't?"

"Pretty sure." Sirius was fairly sure that you didn't go around kissing people you didn't like. Not if you were Remus, anyway.

"Well I don't know Sirius, I'm not a mind reader."

"What am I supposed to do?" Sirius said sadly, adding "Hypothetically," a moment later.

"You could always try, I don't know, asking them?"

"Did you ever consider that one with Lily?"

"Right, that's officially the end of helpful friend time, your advice privileges are suspended."

* * *

Sirius moped and pretended to do his Transfiguration homework all morning. Every time he tried to focus he was distracted by questions like 'why' and 'what did I do wrong', until by lunchtime he'd come up with every possible explanation and felt more miserable than ever. He headed down to the Great Hall for lunch, and froze at the sight of James, Peter and Remus sitting together. Before he could decide what to do, James, who was sat facing the door, spotted him and waved him over.

"You alright Sirius?" Peter asked as he sat down.

"Oh, he's just pining because his hypothetical boyfriend is avoiding him or something," James said, shooting him a look that clearly said 'payback'. Remus stiffened. He hadn't looked at Sirius once.

"What hypothetical boyfriend?" Peter looked confused.

"You've got to be less cagey about these hypothetical romances Padfoot," James shook his head, smirking.

"Thanks Prongs, you guys understand why I went to him for advice on how to cope with hopeless situations right," Sirius said sweetly.

There was a pause where Remus would usually tell them not to start, or say something to distract them both.

"Good stew today," Peter offered after a moment.

* * *

 **Saturday 15** **th** **October 1977**

The first Hogsmeade weekend of the year was clear, bright and unseasonably cold. Hogwarts students clustered outside the castle in cloaks, hats and scarves, preparing to brave the walk to the village. Marlene, Sirius and James were waiting just inside the Entrance Hall – Marlene for Patrick, Sirius and James for Peter.

"I swear, if I catch any of you near me today you won't sit on a broomstick for a month," Marlene threatened them, smiling brightly and scanning the bustling hallway.

"Yep, got the memo thanks," James winced "We only want Zonko's anyway, how do you have time to go on a date with the amount of work McGonagall set us yesterday?"

"You just have to get your priorities in order – unfortunately, McGonagall ranks somewhere below Quidditch and cute boys."

"Well, it's your life. What makes you so certain we'll ruin your date though?" Sirius asked, grinning. Marlene raised her eyebrows at him.

"Fourth year, you snuck a Dungbomb into Jacob's pocket when he went out with Jenny and sat in the corner of the Three Broomsticks laughing while he tried to explain that he really didn't know where the smell came from. Fifth year, whatever you lot were plotting for Eliza when she went to meet Mystery Guy and you tried to follow her and got quite spectacularly hexed. Sixth year, the whole debacle of each and every date Lily went on with Andrew… do I need to go into any more detail?"

"I'd forgotten about poor Jacob, but fair point. I swear on Wormtail's life, we're only going to Zonko's and then coming straight back, so unless your idea of a good first date involves starting a prank war you should be safe," James reassured her.

"And here he comes now; you kids have fun – stay safe!" Marlene ignored Sirius in favour of Patrick, and left with a quick wave over her shoulder. Sirius sighed.

"Why is everyone but us young and happily in love Prongs?"

"Hey, I'm doing just fine thanks, don't drag me down with you and your oh so secretive heartbreak."

"If that's what you call doing fine then I'm not sure I want to see _your_ heartbreak," Sirius snorted.

"She actually speaks to me now without us having a screaming match. She talked about stabbing me the other week and she was actually joking Padfoot, everything is going swimmingly!"

Sirius stared at him for a second.

"Wow, you really need some perspective on this whole Lily thing don't you?"

* * *

"How come you're not going to Hogsmeade with the others?" Lily asked, watching Remus across their usual table in the Arithmancy section.

"We always work together on Saturdays," Remus didn't look up from his Defence Against the Dark Arts notes.

"By that logic we'll always miss Hogsmeade, and I'm sorry Remus but I don't love you enough to skip Christmas shopping."

"Not even if I bring you coffee?"

"Not even if you bring me a bathtub of coffee, stop trying to change the subject," Lily covered his work with her hands, forcing him to look up.

"I have a lot of work, I don't need Zonko's, what's your point?"

"They're your best friends and you've been avoiding them like the plague all week," she pointed out.

"No I haven't!"

"That's true. You had lunch with Peter, and even talked to Potter about Quidditch for an hour which frankly shows a terrifying level of dedication… So really, I mean you're avoiding Sirius."

"Why would I be avoiding Sirius, I don't know what you're talking about," Remus tried to prod her away from his notes.

"Does this have something to do with his 'hypothetical date' thing?" Lily asked carefully. Remus looked away, examining the nearest bookshelf. "I know it sucks, but you can't just stay away from him because he likes someone else," she continued sympathetically.

"Are you saying that you would have an emotionally balanced and sensible reaction to James dating someone else?"

"Oh come on, you can't just pull the Potter card every time you want to derail the conversation, it doesn't even make any sense! I don't like him, he can date whoever he wants!" Lily scowled.

"Sorry, fine, can we just… not, then?" he sighed.

They worked through the rest of the day, Remus trying to put Sirius out of his mind.

"I need to stop leaving all my Transfiguration until the weekend, this human stuff is killing me," Lily complained "Is it time for dinner yet?"

Remus checked the time and groaned.

"Well, no… it might be time to leave for the Prefects' meeting though?"

"We missed dinner?!" Lily swore.

"We're probably going to be late as well," Remus was shoving books into his bag.

"No running in the library!" Madam Pince hissed as they passed the front desk.

"Seriously?" Lily whispered to Remus "This is not running, I haven't run since primary school. It's speed walking, if you're feeling generous."

They were the last two to arrive at the third floor classroom. Unfortunately, sneaking in to a meeting you're supposed to be running was easier said than done.

James was sitting on the teacher's desk at the front of the room, mediating an argument that seemed to be about whether tinsel was too tacky for the Christmas ball.

"Excellent, now we actually have a Head Girl we can start!" he called, looking relieved to see her. Lily made her way to the front of the room. "I would have started without you, but it's pretty hard to do the rota without you or Remus," he added more quietly when she reached him "How come you two missed dinner?"

"Got caught up in Transfiguration, it's a bit of a hopeless case to be honest," Lily admitted "Professor McGonagall says I'm nowhere near ready to start practicing the big stuff on actual people."

"Neither are most of the class, don't worry so much Evans."

"You guys are basically done with the whole of human transfiguration," she pointed out.

"Let's just say every once in a while bending the rules has its perks."

"So you've been breaking the rules and practicing unsupervised," Lily seemed more amused than annoyed.

"Something like that. Should we get started then?"

"The sooner we're done, the sooner I can eat," Lily clapped her hands to get the attention of the room.

"Right everyone, this is only a quick meeting to organise Prefects' rounds for the rest of the term. Paper is on the table, sort it out among yourselves, you all know how this works by now." Lily stood back and watched everyone dive for the paper.

"You know, if you want a hand with Transfiguration…" James trailed off. Lily glanced up to see him looking down at the floor.

"Um, thanks. Remus is helping me though, it should be fine."

"Ah, but you see, I'm actually better than Moony at this," James grinned at her.

"Modest too," Lily smiled despite herself.

"Hey, it doesn't happen very often, let me have this one!"

"I bet it's just because he wouldn't practice dangerous transfiguration with you," said Lily.

"Your lack of faith in my abilities wounds me."

"If I say I believe in your powers of transfiguration will that make you feel better?" Lily asked, trying not to laugh.

"Oh, I meant my ability to persuade Remus to break the rules," James smirked.

"What are you two laughing about?" Remus had escaped the fight over the rota and come to join them at the front desk.

"Nothing for you to worry about my dear Moony," said James.

"See, that does not make me worry any less. I got us Monday nights, eight till twelve, alright?"

"Yeah that's good, now what are we doing about food?" Lily asked. Remus and James exchanged looks.

"Meet you back in the common room Lily?" Remus offered.

"More super-secret Marauder things?"

"Yep, we'd be ruined if I told you. We won't be long!" Remus and James headed towards the main staircase, while Lily made her way to Gryffindor Tower.

Half an hour later, she looked over the top of her book to see them climbing through the portrait hole carrying an honest to god picnic basket.

"Come on, upstairs, best we don't flaunt the rules in the open," James motioned towards the staircase to the boys' dorm.

"You always do it in the open though," Lily said, following them up the spiral stairs and through the doorway labelled 'Seventh Years'. James made an odd sound and Remus snorted with laughter. "Oh come on, what are you, thirteen?"

James had never really noticed quite how much of a mess their dormitory was until Lily Evans was sitting on the edge of Remus' bed. He discreetly kicked some dirty underwear under his own bed, and debated whether he could hide his pyjamas before Lily spotted them (they had snitches and broomstick on and James had loved them dearly until he realised that a girl he liked might see them). Fortunately she was quickly distracted by Remus producing a bowl of stew, a plate of chicken, a big bowl of potatoes and vegetables, rice, some kind of pasta, plates and cutlery. Lily gaped.

"There is no way all of that could fit in there," she said, reaching for a plate.

"See Evans, there's this little thing called magic, it can do wonderful things," James teased.

"Oh whatever Potter."

The room fell silent as they all ate.

"I'm never going to move again," Lily groaned, lying back on the bed. James made a sound of agreement. To their astonishment, Remus reached into the basked again.

"But there's pudding!" he exclaimed, producing chocolate sponge and a jug of custard, still warm.

"You can't possibly still be hungry," Lily looked away from the food.

"Oh, he can if there's chocolate involved," James said without even looking up to check.

"You're all insane," Lily declared.

"What did I do?" James said indignantly.

"… This is your second dinner Potter; you're just as bad as he is!"

"These are perfectly normal eating habits; you just have a weak stomach."

"Oh fuck you Potter," Lily said, but she was laughing.

"In your dreams Evans," James winked at her, and her laughter turned to spluttering denials. Remus shook his head at them.

Twenty minutes later a group of very confused second years heard a girl's voice coming from the boys' dorm, shouting "NOT EVERYTHING I SAY IS AN INNUENDO!" followed by a lot of hysterical laughter.

* * *

"When did it become eleven already?" James sat up, looking at the clock in surprise.

"About ten minutes ago, but keep your voice down, Lily's asleep," Remus said quietly, adjusting the blanket over her.

"Do you reckon we should wake her?" James whispered, looking down at Lily fondly.

"Probably, she should really sleep in her own bed."

"We could take-"

"No, we cannot. She'll hex you until you can't walk if you carry her anywhere," Remus said firmly. James sighed. Before they could move to wake Lily up though, the door bust open to reveal Sirius and Peter.

"Is that Evans in your bed Prongs? I did not see that one coming!" Sirius said loudly.

"Technically it's my bed," Remus pointed out, and they both froze. It was the first time Remus had spoken directly to Sirius since… well, everything.

"Honestly Padfoot, we've lived together for six years and you still don't even know who's bed is whose," James ignored the tension, or was possibly too busy pretending not to be embarrassed to notice it.

"'m going to bed, night." A bleary eyed Lily got to her feet and stumbled towards the door, ducking straight under Sirius' outstretched arm where he leant against the doorframe. There was a moment of silence.

"Did she just steal my blanket?" Remus said.

* * *

A/N: A day late with this one, sorry, I didn't get a chance to upload yesterday. Anonymous, thanks for the review!


	4. October 1977 (II)

**Monday 24** **th** **October 1977**

James wasn't as stupid or oblivious as his best friends seemed to think he was. He had in fact noticed that Sirius and Remus were not talking and were instead actively avoiding one another. It had been two and a half weeks, officially the longest time that any of the Marauders had ever fought for (except for the fifth year Incident, but that had been serious), and something had to give. James was fairly determined that this would be soon – he was sick of mostly only seeing one of them at a time, and trying to hold conversations on the rare occasions that both of them were present and having to bridge every awkward pause. There was also the matter of the full moon deadline coming up…

Fortunately, a perfect opportunity to fix things had presented itself that evening, after a particularly painful dinner. James slammed the door and locked it, turning to Lily with a satisfied expression.

"And now we do our Prefectly duty, and come back at midnight or so, whenever we're done," he said. Lily mostly looked worried.

"Are you sure this is a good idea?"

"Have you got a better one?" he shot back. And okay, maybe this opportunity was slightly engineered, but it was perfect nonetheless. All he'd done was persuade Sirius to sneak into an empty classroom with him to practice their defensive spells, and talk Lily into telling him which classroom she and Remus would be walking past shortly after eight on their Prefects' rounds, and spend about an hour convincing her that they should do this, and then duck out of the room when he heard them coming past, shove Remus inside and lock the door before either of them realised what was going on.

Lily didn't say anything, just started walking off to continue their rounds.

Inside the classroom, there was silence. Remus tried the door a few times, but as expected it was definitely locked. Sirius was sitting on a desk, staring at some marks on the table and very pointedly not acknowledging Remus' presence. Remus opened his mouth, and then shut it again.

* * *

"Should we go back and check on them?" Lily spoke up as they were walking past the entrance to the Gryffindor common room an hour in to their patrol.

"Quit worrying Evans, they're both far too stubborn for their own good, no one will even have spoken yet. We have to stick to the plan exactly, and the plan says we don't go back until midnight at the very – OI, you there!" James snapped "Aren't you a third year?"

A small girl hastily hid something in her pockets.

"Y-yes, sir," she said, looking between the two of them nervously.

"Your curfew was half an hour ago, five points from – what house are you in again?" Lily asked.

"R-Ravenclaw, Miss, um, Head Girl."

"Turn out your pockets," James ordered "Right, Dungbombs are banned as I'm sure you know, lunchtime detention tomorrow, I'm supervising and I will remember if you don't turn up. Straight back to Ravenclaw Tower, now." The girl ran off in the opposite direction looking annoyed as Lily and James continued walking.

"Did she just call you sir?" Lily looked like she might crack a rib from trying not to laugh.

"Is that idea funny to you, Miss Head Girl?"

"Not at all, sir."

"Ha ha, very funny," James said in a monotone.

"Anyway, isn't McGonagall supervising tomorrow's lunch detention?"

"No, she asked me to take it. Well, technically she asked me to ask you – can you believe it, it's like they still don't completely trust me – but I volunteered, wouldn't want to deprive you of your lunch," James said, craning his neck to check down a side corridor as they walked past.

"Doesn't that mean you're missing lunch instead?"

"Here on Earth we say 'thank you', Evans."

"If you're sure, then thank you." Lily smiled.

* * *

Remus was looking out of the window, pretending that he wasn't painfully aware of Sirius' every step as he paced up and down the classroom, when Sirius suddenly spoke.

"Okay, just tell me this, what the _fuck_ did I do to deserve any of this shit?" He started off almost shouting angrily, but his voice broke mid-sentence. Remus turned, half standing, already shaking his head.

"No- Sirius, _no_ , this doesn't have anything to do with you!"

"Really, because I'd say I was pretty involved!"

"This is my problem, not yours."

"Then why the hell am I being punished for it?" Sirius snapped.

"You're not – I'm not -"

"What is this then?"

"I made a mistake, alright," Remus said without thinking. Sirius reeled back as though Remus had slapped him, looking hurt. "I – fuck, that came out wrong, I didn't mean…"

"It's pretty clear what you mean Remus," Sirius said coldly.

"I'm a _monster_ Sirius! Did you forget that while you were busy shoving your tongue down my throat, did you forget that I can hurt you? I could kill you-" Sirius flinched "- or worse, you could end up exactly like me, there's a fantastic fucking fairy tale ending for you!" Remus snarled.

"So it's alright for us to go running around with you once a month, but god forbid someone – someone cares about you?"

"No, it's not fucking alright; I let that get too far as well! I can't stop you now though can I, none of you seem to understand that I am dangerous, this isn't some fun adventure!" It was suddenly starting to sound like the screaming rows they had after the Snape incident, followed by an entire summer of angry silence.

"YOU THINK WE DON'T KNOW THAT? WE KNOW EXACTLY WHO YOU ARE REMUS, AND IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU BEING A GOD DAMNED WEREWOLF," Sirius shouted. There was a shocked pause hearing it said so loudly. Remus recovered fast though.

"I AM THE WEREWOLF SIRIUS, YOU CAN'T JUST CUT THAT PART OFF AND IGNORE IT! IT'S ALL ME, MONSTER AND ALL." They were both shouting at the top of their lungs now.

"AND I FUCKING LOVE YOU ANYWAY," Sirius bellowed, and promptly went the colour of a tomato. Remus didn't say anything, and it took Sirius a few moments to realise that he was crying.

"Hey, hey, come here," Sirius took a few steps towards him when he didn't move "You're so full of shit, you know that right?"

"And you're t-terrible at m-making people feel b-better," Remus got out between sobs, and seconds later Sirius was hugging him tightly.

"Look you're wrong about all this stuff – don't interrupt me – so, so wrong, Remus. No one is less of a monster than you are. There werewolf is _nothing_ to do with you, you know as well as I do that you have no control or influence over it and it's not your fault."

"It's not safe, we can't do this Sirius, we can't-" Sirius shushed him.

"Can we just be friends again? And pretend I didn't confess my love to you five minutes ago?" Sirius asked a moment later. Remus gave a watery laugh.

"Yes, please. Hell, let's make it even – I've been head over heels for you since we were fourteen and you jumped in the lake to save Peter while we were camping with the Potters," Remus smiled down at the ground.

"The idiot didn't think to mention that he couldn't swim," Sirius shook his head at the memory.

"To be fair, the lake was only six feet deep."

"Hey, stop ruining my hero moment!"

"How long do you reckon it'll be before they come back for us?" Remus asked, wiping at his eyes surreptitiously.

"Those assholes will probably leave us here all night, let's be honest."

"I have a pack of cards?" Remus reached into one of his pockets.

Sirius shuffled and dealt the cards and they began a game of snap.

"So we're not speaking to James for a week, right?" Sirius asked four or five explosions in.

"Of course not, he's in deep shit."

* * *

 **Tuesday 25** **th** **October 1977**

Breakfast that morning was gloriously normal. James didn't like to brag, but he felt like he could take some credit for this after the previous night's success. All four Marauders were sat together, tension gone like nothing had ever happened (mostly). Sirius and Remus were avoiding casual touching as though it could burn, but otherwise everything was fine. Wonderful, even.

"What are you lot doing up anyway, only me and Pete even have a class before break?" Remus asked, confused.

"Oh, I woke up early and figured I might as well get up and do some work," James lied through his teeth. In reality he'd gotten up when he heard Sirius getting ready in order to go internally gloat all the way through breakfast.

"Don't suppose anyone's done the Potions essay?" Peter asked hopefully.

"… The one that's due in about four hours?" James asked.

"We don't have another one do we?" Peter looked worried.

"No, Pete, just that one. I guess that's our cue to go to the library," Sirius said gloomily, gathering up his bag.

* * *

Lily wasn't really sure why she was doing this. Or what she was doing, if she was being perfectly honest with herself. But after a quick trip to the Great Hall, lunchtime found Lily crossing the Transfiguration Courtyard on her way to Professor McGonagall's classroom. She awkwardly ducked into the room, trying to ignore the pause in the scratching of quills as the rows of people sitting at the desks turned to stare at her, and made her way towards the teacher's desk which James was sitting behind.

"Hey, to what do I owe this pleasure?" he asked, smiling up at her. Lily leant against the edge of the desk, her back to the room, and produced a bundle of food from her bag.

"Not quite the feast you pulled off on Saturday, but I figured you would be hungry," she said, unwrapping sandwiches and cake. James' face lit up.

"Plenty good enough trust me, I forgot to nick food from breakfast. I was facing double Potions on an empty stomach," he looked horrified at the thought.

"That would be terrible, you wouldn't be able to properly appreciate the joy of potion making."

"… I can't even tell if you're joking or not," James shook his head.

"You'll never know," Lily grinned, reaching for a sandwich "How's your Felix."

"Disaster, probably, but it could be worse," James said cheerfully "I'm guessing yours is precisely the level of golden that it should be?"

"Severus' is better," Lily admitted grudgingly.

"That's not what I asked, and he's also a massive bag of dicks, which you are most definitely not," James said pleasantly. Lily choked a little on a bite of sandwich, and a boy sitting in the front row stifled a laugh. James glared at him until he hurriedly returned to writing lines.

"Charming."

"I am, aren't I. You know you don't have to stay, right?"

"It's fine – if you don't mind, that is," Lily had a horrible feeling that she was blushing slightly, and she stared at the board behind James willing it to go away because _why was she blushing_ they were just having lunch. She had lunch with people all the time, and they were kind of friends now, weren't they. Actually –

"Are we, you know, friends now?" Lily blurted out, and then resisted the urge to kick herself. James' face didn't seem to know what it was doing. "Shit, ignore me, I don't know where that came from."

"Of course we are," James said, taking a slice of cake and stuffing it into his mouth to hide his smile.

"Oh. Okay then."

They quickly moved on to less awkward topics for the remainder of the lunch hour.

"I'd better get going," Lily said "I need to grab my books before class, I'll see you later."

"Sure, see you. Hey-" she turned, halfway to the door, as James called after her "Thanks, Lily."

* * *

 **Thursday 27** **th** **October 1977**

"Right team, we've only got another five practices before the match against Slytherin next month," James began his talk while half the team were still getting changed into their Quidditch robes "I'm trying to book an extra practice session on a weekend though, so don't even think about making plans until the game is over, got it?" Sirius rolled his eyes, and the rest of the team nodded.

"Okay, we're running the same tactics as Tuesday, since our intelligence says the Slytherin chasers are weak, everyone out – three laps of the pitch to warm up, then Sirius, I want the beaters practicing diversion techniques with a seeker while we practice keeper attack. We want Slytherin on the defensive people!" There was a somewhat mocking round of applause, and they headed out onto the pitch, which squelched underfoot. Mud splattered everywhere as they kicked off from the soft ground into the air, and rain flew in their faces. Sirius was pretty sure their 'warm up' was only making him colder, and soon everyone was soaking wet and shivering on their brooms.

If only they had a sane, normal Captain, Sirius mused as James shouted over the wind and rain.

"THERE'S A VERY GOOD CHANCE WE'LL BE FLYING IN THIS SORT OF WEATHER FOR THE MATCH, OR WORSE, SO THIS IS GOOD PRACTICE!"

It was a miserable group that traipsed back up to the castle two hours later when even James was forced to concede defeat after one of the chasers was nearly blown backwards off her broomstick.

"Ah, warmth! I'd nearly forgotten what my fingers felt like!" Sirius was lying on the floor in front of the fire in the Gryffindor common room in his pyjamas, James and Marlene huddled in the nearest chairs, hands and feet stretched towards the fireplace.

"You're all so dramatic," an amused Lily was sitting with her feet up on the sofa next to them doing some reading for Care of Magical Creatures.

"You try going out there and flying fifty feet in the air in the fucking freezing rain," Marlene muttered irritably.

"Don't forget the wind," Sirius added.

"Couldn't if I tried. My ears will never be the same."

"Yes, but we are going to beat Slytherin," James said, looking far too pleased with himself for Sirius' liking.

"Not if the whole team gets frostbite first!" he said, waving his (now perfectly normal looking) hands at James.

"Drama queen," Lily coughed.

"Where's Remus anyway?" Marlene asked "He didn't look so good today."

"The idiot insisted on going to classes even though he was ill," Sirius said. None of them knew how Remus had persuaded Madam Pomfrey to let him go to classes on the day of the full moon – something about getting behind on N.E.W.T. work – but he had started off pale and tired looking at breakfast and it had only gone downhill from there.

"Is he okay?" Lily asked, closing her book and looking concerned.

"Just a stomach bug or something. Sometimes I wonder if he even has an immune system," James lied "Anyone for a game of chess?"

Eventually, everyone but James, Sirius and Peter had gone to bed. They left the common room in silence, and carefully navigated the corridors of Hogwarts using the Marauders' Map to avoid running into anyone on the way to the Entrance Hall – they were really too big to all fit under James' invisibility cloak these days. They slipped out of the front doors, and Peter transformed while they were still out of sight of anyone who happened to be looking out of the castle windows.

"You make such a cute rat," Sirius observed, picking him up and dropping him into his pocket. Peter squeaked his annoyance and James threw the cloak over them, tugging so that it mostly covered everything. Hopefully no one would be close enough to see their feet.

"You couldn't have picked a different day to torture us at practice?" Sirius hissed as they crossed the ground "I feel like I had a fight with the Giant Squid and lost."

"Well, that'll teach you to warm up properly!"

They bickered all the way to the Whomping Willow where they set Peter on the ground to freeze the tree, and all the way down the tunnel to the Shrieking Shack, where they were forced to stop as they transformed into their Animagus forms. They settled down to wait. Remus drew the line at letting them see him transform after the first time. They stayed by the entrance to the house, listening to the screaming echoing through the rooms down to where they waited. Sirius resisted the urge to try and cover his ears. He knew it wouldn't help, but the sound of Remus' agony was almost unbearable.

Eventually, the noise died down, and they went inside. The Shrieking Shack was bare and empty, the few pieces of furniture mostly overturned and smashed. James led the way up the stairs to Remus' usual bedroom (and Sirius would never get over how hilarious it was watching a stag using stairs made for a human).

Fifteen minutes later, they were running through the Forbidden Forest, Peter gripping on to Sirius' fur. After all the drama of the week so far they'd all agreed that Hogsmeade was probably a bad idea tonight, but as long as they avoided the lair of the giant spiders (and if it wasn't a discussion bound to get him thrown out of Hogwarts Sirius would have quite liked a few words with Dumbledore about what he kept out here) and the areas more popular with the centaurs the forest was safe enough, for them and anything that met them.

They left Remus in the Shrieking Shack as the sun rose and crept back into the castle, taking a long path across the damp lawns to avoid Madam Pomfrey hurrying down to collect Remus, and collapsed into bed to nap for an hour before classes.

* * *

 **Monday 31** **st** **October 1977**

Sirius was the last to arrive at breakfast that morning. The rest of the Marauders were already eating, sat with Lily, Marlene, Jenny and Elizabeth.

"Today is an important day," he declared dramatically, dropping into the empty space next to James at the Gryffindor table. James turned a page of his Daily Prophet, calmly eating his toast and ignoring Sirius.

"It's only Halloween," Jenny said, looking confused.

"Oh never mind Halloween, that's just a feast. I'm talking about far more exciting things!" Sirius looked around expectantly for a moment until Lily sighed.

"Fine, I'll bite. What is today, Sirius?"

"Why Lily flower, since you asked, today marks three days until my birthday!"

Lily rolled her eyes and turned her attention back to her breakfast. Sirius looked disappointed in the lack of reaction, and left as soon as he finished eating.

"This is worth it just to see the look on his face," Marlene said gleefully.

"You realise we're doing a nice thing for Sirius right?" Remus asked, amused.

"Yes, but we get to make him miserable first because he thinks none of us care about his birthday."

"Right, back to Thursday's plan – Remus, you'll stick with Sirius after History of Magic and keep him away until its time. Pete and I are on food, the rest of you – decorations etcetera. Any questions? No? Great, we should get going to Defence," James said, standing up.

* * *

The Halloween feast never failed to amaze Lily. The Great Hall was lined with skeletons, and truly enormous pumpkins floated in mid-air, elaborately carved and filled with what must be hundreds of candles each, casting oddly shaped shadows outlined in patches of flickering light down onto the crowds below. Real live bats flew around beneath the enchanted ceiling, which showed a clear starry night and the waning moon. The tables were set with empty plates, serving dishes and platters, just like the start of term feast, but cobwebs hung between goblets and there were bowls of sweets placed every few feet along each table (a first year jumped and yelled in surprise, pulling back their hand as a small spider emerged from between the wrappers). Filch the caretaker and his cat Mrs Norris were lurking around, most likely unintentionally adding to the effect.

"Come on, let's get seats before we end up surrounded by first years, you're far too excited about Halloween," Marlene tugged Lily towards the Gryffindor table and they all sat down directly beneath one of the giant pumpkins.

"Halloween means that we can start counting down until Christmas," Lily said seriously just as the Marauders joined them.

"Any mention of Christmas until after my birthday and you'll regret it Evans," Sirius warned, unfazed by the spiders crawling over his hand as he reached for the sweets.

"I'm breaking out the Christmas socks tomorrow, what are you going to do about it Black?"

At that moment Professor Dumbledore stood and the students fell silent.

"I hope it's a quick speech, I'm starving," Peter whispered.

"Happy Halloween!" Dumbledore sat back down again, adjusting his long beard. All of the plates had filled with food – the usual casseroles, pasta, vegetables and roast meats were interspersed with pumpkin flavoured everything.

"You were saying Pete?" Remus asked, ladling pumpkin soup into his bowl.

"I feel like this would be more festive if we didn't have pumpkin juice literally every day," Elizabeth observed, and then jumped, spilling half the contents of the jug down her robes as a pair of yellow eyes stared up at her from underneath the table. "That fucking cat is evil, I swear!"

On Lily's other side, an increasingly disgruntled Sirius was listening to Marlene detail the excruciation amount of work she could get done on Thursday night.

"- you know, since James had to move Quidditch practice to Wednesday night so that he can do Head Boy stuff with Lily," she continued, suppressing a smile.

When all of the plates were finally empty, and all their stomachs full of pumpkin pie and toffee apples, they dragged themselves back to Gryffindor common room, groaning.

"The first person to mention homework right now is going straight off the top of the Astronomy Tower," Sirius lay across a whole sofa, sighing in contentment.

"You're the only person here mentioning schoolwork Padfoot," James shoved him halfway off so he could sit down, and Sirius promptly stuck his feet straight into James' lap "and anyway, we have more important things to discuss – it's less than two weeks until the match against Slytherin."

"Can't we ban Quidditch talk too?" Lily said from her spot on the other sofa.

"Why would anyone not want to talk about Quidditch? You all have to come to the match," Sirius ordered, and then they were off talking about tactics and moves with strange sounding names.

Peter and Remus were deep in discussion about whether they had outgrown Dungbombs as a pranking method yet –

"It's great _because_ it's simple, you don't need fancy spells to screw with someone," Peter was arguing.

"But by fifth year everyone knows how to get rid of the smell, and we really shouldn't be targeting fourteen year olds these days," Remus pointed out.

"Some fourteen year olds have it coming," Jenny chipped in cheerfully (her younger brother was a fourth year, and constantly drove her up the wall when they were at home).

"Family feuds are a whole different matter; nothing is too immature for that," Remus said "Poor Mr and Mrs Potter had an interesting summer with James and Sirius around."

Meanwhile Lily and Elizabeth were having almost the exact same conversation they had every year around this time.

"November is not too early to be thinking about Christmas!" Lily exclaimed "You're just a miserable Scrooge."

"Hey, I love Christmas! Just, you know, in December, where it belongs."

"You're so, so wrong Eliza. It's just tragic," Lily shook her head mournfully "It's _never_ too early to start thinking about Christmas. And there's nothing between Halloween and Christmas, so you can start thinking of present ideas and counting down the days, let the anticipation build…"

"Come on Jenny, back me up, tell her that she's wrong!"

"I'm never wrong," Lily stuck her tongue out.

"No, you've never missed the glaringly obvious before have you Lily?" Elizabeth smiled sweetly as Lily went red.

"He's _right there_ Eliza, shut up!" she whispered.

"Whatever, my point is – Christmas can wait!"

"But if I start in December I won't get to wear all of my Christmas socks before Christmas day1 Also, again – the anticipation! You just have to start in November!"

"Are you hearing this shit Jenny?" Elizabeth poked Jenny until she turned back to their conversation.

"Hmm?"

"Christmas. Not for another two months. Make Lily stop."

"It's only fifty five days away," Jenny grinned and high fived Lily.

"… What did I do to deserve this."


	5. November 1977 (I)

**Thursday 3** **rd** **November 1977**

Sirius was fairly sure he was dreaming. Or hallucinating. Something that could explain why not one of his friends had wished him a happy birthday yet, or given any indication that they knew it was his birthday at all. He'd woken up that morning to find their beds all empty, so Sirius dressed and headed down to the Great Hall alone for breakfast. He joined James and Remus, deep in conversation about some translation for Ancient Runes which they barely even looked up from on his arrival.

This became the pattern for the day; all of his friends were having perfectly normal conversations about work or Quidditch or what there would be for dinner tonight, and not a single person mentioned the date. By lunchtime, Sirius was thoroughly confused, and giving serious thought to the dreams/hallucinations theory.

By the time their History of Magic class was over, Sirius was grumpy enough that he allowed Remus to drag him to the library until dinner. He didn't expect his friends to get him anything, but he did wish Remus _hadn't_ decided to give him the gift of finishing his homework for Binns before they'd even been out of class for an hour.

* * *

In the Gryffindor common room, Lily was balancing on the back of an armchair, pinning up one end of a large banner which read "Happy Birthday Sirius!" in large red and gold letters, and had a neat little picture of a figure on a broom zooming in and out of the words ("I never knew Peter could draw," Jenny had remarked, watching Remus enchant the image). Elizabeth was sat on Marlene's shoulders holding up the other end, while Jenny stood on the other side of the room and shouted unhelpful things like "Up a bit… no not that side, sorry," while they tried to get it to hang straight.

They had already set up tables below the windows (and where did the Marauders even get these things? Marlene had shrugged and said it was better not to ask when Lily voiced this question), and balloons floated everywhere, tied to anything that would hold them down. They finally got the banner up, and stood back to admire their efforts.

"… Well, straight is overrated anyway," Marlene offered.

"Oh it'll do." Lily pulled out her wand and pointed it towards the ceiling, red and gold streamers blossoming from the end. "Are we missing anything?"

The sound of the portrait swinging open came through the hole, and they all tensed until they saw James and Peter climbing through.

"The party has arrived!" James called. Peter dropped his bags with a loud thud. Lily spotted a Honeydukes label, and then finally registered that James was levitating a giant Snitch in front of him.

"Is that a cake?" Jenny said, amazed "Wow!"

"Yes, we'd better hurry up though, people will be comping up from dinner soon."

The common room had filled with people, they had set out all the snacks on the table and Lily was lining up bottles of Butterbeer in neat rows when James called over the chatter.

"Five minutes until Sirius should be here!"

"Maybe we should we hide?" Peter suggested. Elizabeth looked around.

"… I don't think we'll all fit behind the sofa somehow."

* * *

"Are you done yet?" Sirius said irritably. He swore that Remus was dragging out dinner unnecessarily – the Gryffindor table was almost empty, but he was still eating.

"Fine, let's go drop our stuff back in our room then," Remus also seemed to be completely ignoring Sirius' annoyance. They walked back to the common room mostly in silence, and Sirius crawled through the portrait hole first.

"SURPRISE!"

Sirius stared around in shock, until he spotted his friends standing underneath a huge banner.

"You absolute assholes!" he said, laughing "Once this party is over I'm not talking to any of you for a week, see how you like it!"

"Happy birthday! Yes, yes, we're horrible people; does that mean you don't want your present?" James handed him a terribly wrapped package liberally coated in Spellotape "No magic," he added as Sirius scratched at the paper looking for an edge.

"He looked about ready to kill you when he came in," Lily said to Remus "What did you do to him?"

"I made him do his History of Magic homework," Remus smirked, watching Sirius fight with James' wrapping.

"Wow. Once again I underestimated your capacity for evil. Remind me not to get on your bad side."

"Firewhiskey!" Sirius threw his arms around James, loudly proclaiming his love to the whole room.

"I have to run up and get his present form our dorm," Remus excused himself, and Lily turned back to the others just in time to see a cloud of glitter come out of the card that Sirius was opening, and decided to get some food before she went over.

She was examining custard tarts for signs of tampering (you couldn't be too careful around the Marauders) when all the candles were suddenly extinguished, revealing a glow from the stairs to the boys' dorm, where Marlene and James were standing with the cake hovering in mid-air in front of them.

"Happy birthday to you," they began singing, horrifically off key "Happy birthday to you," Jenny was snapping photos "Happy birthday dear Siriuuus," the cake came to a halt in front of Sirius, bathing his smiling face in candlelight "Happy birthday to youuuuuuuuu!"

Sirius blew out all eighteen candles in one breath and the room burst into applause, the Quidditch team whooping loudly.

"Where did you guys even get this?" he asked, cutting into the Snitch and smiling for the camera "I'm guessing Moony had a say in it."

"I didn't actually, but who doesn't like chocolate cake?!"

"True, want some?"

"Swap you for this?" Remus held out a brightly coloured box shaped parcel. Sirius cut off a slab of cake and grabbed for the box excitedly, ripping off the paper. He opened the lid and turned a few pages of the book inside before quickly abandoning it to wrap himself around Remus.

"I figured, since this is our last year, you'd want something to remember it all," Remus tried very hard to pretend that he wasn't hyper aware of every point where Sirius was touching him, and ignore the stupid butterflies feeling in his stomach.

"But you're not going anywhere, you aren't allowed to go anywhere!"

"No, we're not going anywhere. It's never going to be like this again though, is it?"

"Well that's a cheerful thought," Sirius disentangled himself to continue looking through the photo album.

"Sorry," Remus leant against the back of a sofa "Do you like it?" he added hesitantly.

"Are you kidding, I love it!" they both went red just as James elbowed his way past the nearest people carrying three bottles of Butterbeer.

"Drink for the birthday boy, drink for – well, you aren't Lily, but close enough," James handed them both bottles, Remus shaking his head "Where is she anyway?"

"Think she went to the toilet, she'll be back soon, no need to pine," Remus said.

"Yes, there shall be no pining on my birthday, come on Prongsy, we're playing party games!"

"Party games – what games, we didn't plan any games?" James allowed himself to be tugged across the room, Remus following after them.

"Evans! Come play a game with us!"

"What game were you thinking Sirius?" she asked cautiously.

"… I don't know, actually. If I say spin the bottle you will say…?"

"Not a chance, try again?"

"Will our Head Girl deign to participate in breaking in to another common room?"

"That's not a party game is it?" Peter asked.

"It is the way I'm thinking," Sirius grinned.

"What is the way you're thinking?" James said thoughtfully.

"I have no idea, it just sounded good."

"I think we have Twister in our dorm?" Jenny had joined the conversation, Marlene and Eliza with her.

"What in Merlin's name is Twister?" Sirius asked, confused.

"Oh, you'll like this – clear some floor space and I'll go grab it," Marlene grinned.

"This is going to end badly," Lily said, helping Peter to shove one of the sofas aside.

Half an hour later, with Sirius breathing down his neck and his head somewhere near James' armpit, Remus had to admit to himself that she might have been right. Lily spun again.

"Left foot red."

Peter moved an inch and they all went down in a pile of limbs and muffled swearing.

"Right, hand over the spinner thing," Remus stood up "I think I have about ninety new bruises."

"Yes, you should play Lily flower!" Sirius exclaimed, bouncing to his feet.

"I'm fine, really," she said without much hope.

"It's your game, technically, you really should play," Marlene said innocently. Lily shot her a look which she hoped conveyed 'traitor' well enough but allowed herself to be pushed towards the mat.

"Okay, everyone ready?" Remus took the spinner from Lily "Left hand green."

"I'm really not flexible enough for this," Lily muttered.

"Oh really?" Sirius winked at her, teasing.

"Don't you dare start this again."

"Right foot blue," Remus called.

Four moves later, Lily was uncomfortably arched over Sirius' leg, in serious danger of elbowing Peter in the face if the next instruction involved her left arm at all, and inexplicably hopelessly intertwined with James Potter. She shut her eyes for a brief second, contemplating all the life decisions that brought her to this point.

"If I go down, you go down with me," James seemed to have no problem with the situation whatsoever.

"I think that's unavoidable at this point," she said.

"Left foot yellow!" Peter's nose survived another minute intact at least. Sirius collapsed underneath her.

"Piss off Padfoot, you're in the way," James ineffectually prodded him with an elbow.

"I'm kind of stuck here. Also, it's much more fun if you two are forced to cuddle up like that," Sirius waggled his eyebrows suggestively, and Lily tried not to think about exactly what this looked like if you took the context of Twister away. Or even if you didn't take the Twister away. Fuck.

"Right hand green." Peter fell, leaving only Lily and James. Sirius wriggled out from under them to 'get a better view of the action'.

"There's no way one of us can win this," Lily pointed out.

"Right foot red." Lily glanced over at the nearest red spot (too far away for her foot to have any hope of reaching while she was stuck on green)… but if she didn't try, James would win. They both went to move at the same time, and predictably lost their balance, laughing hysterically.

James got to his feet, and held out a hand. Lily took it, letting him pull her to her feet.

"Thanks," she said, still laughing "Wow, Remus wasn't joking about the bruises."

The party started to wind down by midnight – school didn't stop just for Sirius Black's birthday (no matter how many petitions he circulated to that effect), and everyone was tired from a long day of classes and party set up and partying. Sirius hugged Lily as she said her good nights, to her surprise, and she hugged him back, wondering when exactly her friendship group had grown to include the school's biggest troublemakers. Not that they had done all that much this year, she thought as she climbed the stairs to the girls' dorm – plenty of smaller things, but nothing big and flashy yet. James especially kept surprising her… She'd never known him to be responsible about anything other than Quidditch before this year (and she wasn't sure fanatic was really the same as responsible, anyway).

She pushed it all out of her head as she washed her face. It had been a nice night, there was no need to over analyse every little thing. Lily changed into her pyjamas and drew the curtains around her four poster bed and was asleep within minutes.

* * *

 **Saturday 12** **th** **November 1977**

The day of the first Quidditch match of the year was grey and a bit miserable looking, but James had never been so happy to see the boring expanse of clouds. The Wizarding Wireless had been predicting lightning, thunder and possible hail in the Hogwarts region all week, but it looked more like a shower and a bit of wind at worst. He threw open the window next to his bed, grinning as he felt the light breeze – nothing major. The knot of worry in his stomach loosened a little – one thing was going okay.

"Why the everloving fuck is it so cold," Sirius moaned, cracking an eye open to look at the clock and immediately burying his head under his pillow. James snorted and pulled the window shut again before getting dressed.

The common room was empty this early in the morning, but the fire was already lit to remove the chill from the air. He sat down in one of the comfy armchairs, staring out of the window for a bit, and then got up and paced. What he really wanted was to review his tactical notes and diagrams, but Sirius had forcible confiscated them last night when he found James sitting in their dorm room alone at half eleven, poking figures with his wand and watching the little squiggles move and frowning. He checked the time again – only twenty minutes had passed.

And yeah, okay, maybe James was considerably less relaxed about the upcoming match than he was pretending to be. There was nothing left to do now though; he'd had them out training in all weathers at least twice a week every single week since try outs, almost all the time he wasn't working was devoted to planning out the best way to take the cup, and he knew his team was good. But he'd still woken up at six that morning, a whole five hours before the match was due to start.

James sighed and looked into the fire, trying (for once) to clear his mind of Quidditch.

The next thing he knew, there was a hand on his shoulder and someone was speaking to him.

"Oi! Glorious captain, wakey wakey," Sirius' voice came loud and clear. James rubbed at his eyes beneath his glasses and stood up, blinking in confusion as a blanket fell to the floor.

"What time is it?"

"Only just gone half nine, don't worry. Figured I'd wake you before the team started coming down for breakfast."

"Where did the blanket come from?" James asked, folding it and placing it on the back of the sofa.

"No idea, isn't it yours?" Sirius shrugged, turning to head for the portrait hole. James followed, trying to get back to properly awake again.

The Great Hall was starting to fill with people in anticipation of the game. James and Sirius claimed seats in the middle of the Gryffindor table and were soon joined by the rest of the Quidditch team. The new players looked pale and ill, and James shovelled food onto their plates, quietly offering words of encouragement.

Once everyone had eaten something it was time to head down to the changing rooms. James would never lose the strange mix of nerves, pride and excitement upon seeing his name on the back of his Quidditch robes. He took a deep breath and turned to give his pre-game speech. It felt like seconds later that they were walking out onto the pitch to loud cheers from most of the stands. He shook hands with the Slytherin captain, keeping a straight face through the tight grip, and returned to his spot in the line.

James mounted his broom and kicked off. The second he entered the air the sounds of the audience seemed to fade, and he circled the pitch as the commentator shouted from beneath them.

"Strong side from Gryffindor this year, put together by James Potter in his third and final year of captaincy, a lot of pressure there. We've got Owley, Peeler, Devereaux, Potter, Sayre, McKinnon and Black! And here are the Slytherins…"

They settled into their opening positions, carefully watching the referee, and then all at once they were off.

"And we have Devereaux in possession, nice pass to Sayre, he's going to lose it-" James dropped like a stone, starting away the Slytherin Chasers closing in on the Quaffle "Or not, nice move from Potter there, Sayre passes back to Devereaux, approaching the goals now, GRYFFINDOR SCORE!"

The stands erupted into cheers.

"Ooh, nasty hit there, that's a penalty to Gryffindor, attacking the Keeper is a foul people," Marlene was shouting swearwords at the Slytherin Beater, who was fortunately too far away to hear her. James glanced back to check that she was okay, and then flew up to take the penalty shot.

It quickly became clear that the Slytherin Beaters had lethal aim and apparently very little care for the actual rules. James executed a tight spin to avoid another Bludger, Quaffle tucked under one arm as he sped towards the Slytherin goalposts.

"Potter passes to Sayre – drops it – nice catch by Devereaux, did they plan that, who knows – nearly a collision there, nicely dodged – back to Sayre – shoot – ah, better luck next time, textbook dive there."

The audience groaned and cheered as the Slytherin keeper saved. James quickly scanned the air for Sirius – he was flying high above, playing some elaborate game with Regulus who seemed torn between tailing Sirius so closely that he couldn't breathe without him knowing and taking the aggressive position, flying off alone and diving for an imaginary snitch.

"The score stands at fifty twenty to Gryffindor, and McKinnon – holy shit I can't believe the arms on that girl, damn – sorry Professor – McKinnon passes to Potter after a spectacular save, what a throw, Slytherin aren't close enough to intercept this one, only the Keeper stands in his way, Potter shoots, and he scores! Sixty twen- Has Black seen the Snitch?" James turned with everyone else to watch Sirius, nearly vertical, speeding for the ground. He pulled his broom up at just the right moment, hands empty.

"Ouch, that has got to hurt. Black – ah, the Slytherin Seeker – falls for a perfectly executed Wronski Feint from Black – the Gryffindor Seeker – one of you needs a new name – and that's the Slytherin Captain calling for a time out."

James flew towards the Gryffindor goalposts, taking advantage of the break to talk to the rest of the team, who were all congratulating Sirius. On the ground Madam Pomfrey was checking Regulus over.

"Incredible mate, although I don't think Quidditch was invented so you could try and murder your brother," James laughed "You're all doing great, just don't let it slip, and Sirius?"

"Yes Captain?" Sirius mock saluted.

"Try and actually see the Snitch soon maybe?"

The referee blew her whistle and they all spread back out into game positions. Another two blasts and play resumed, Regulus now keeping a safe distance away from Sirius.

* * *

"Four hours in and it's one hundred and thirty forty to Gryffindor, Slytherin in possession, dodging Potter – but nice bludger from Peeler, Quaffle falls straight into Devereaux's hands – Gryffindor team moving as one today – play moves back towards the Slytherin end – Sayre – Potter – Sayre – Deveraux – Potter – bludger to the face, ouch, but he's already passed to Devereaux who enters the scoring area, Devereaux scores – AND BLACK HAS THE SNITCH, SIRIUS BLACK THAT IS, I'M SO GLAD THAT YOU TWO NEVER PLAY EACH OTHER AGAIN, GRYFFINDOR WIN, TWO HUNDRED AND NINETY POINTS TO SLYTHERIN'S FORTY!"

James clutched his broken nose as he descended to the ground, but he was grinning through the sweat and blood.

"TWO HUNDRED AND NINETY TO FORTY, INCREDIBLY PERFORMANCE FROM THE GRYFFINDOR TEAM," the commentator was still shouting, and the Gryffindors in the stands were shouting and screaming and chanting and honestly you'd think they'd won the cup already.

"GRYFFINDOR, GRYFFINDOR, GRYFFINDOR!"

"SOMEONE MAKE POTTER SEE MADAM POMFREY," the commentator added over the din, voice almost lost even with the megaphone. The entire team were hugging and screeching at one another, laughing as their friends (and most of Gryffindor house) descended on them, shouting their congratulations. James just beamed around at everyone, telling his team how wonderful they were whenever anyone came past him. A gentle tug on his arm pulled his attention away, and he found himself being nudged towards the stands.

"Come on, at least get that looked at before you go off to celebrate," Lily smiled at him in amusement "Doesn't it hurt?"

And if he thought about it, the throbbing in his face was really quite painful, but it was far from the first time he'd broken his nose during Quidditch, and he was too high on the excitement of their victory to really feel it. He shook his head, but followed her towards Madam Pomfrey anyway, who frowned at him and muttered about 'dangerous sports for schoolchildren' while she fixed his nose and cleaned away some of the blood.

Remus and Peter had vanished by the time Madam Pomfrey let him go, probably sneaking off to Hogsmeade to get Butterbeer, and as they made their way through the castle Sirius split off towards the kitchens for food. The Gryffindor common room was full of people talking, laughing and shouting, work forgotten.

"Did you see me dodge that bludger?!" Joanna Sayre was saying excitedly to her fourth year friends "I never got that move in practice!"

Sirius climbed through the portrait hole with the food and was immediately mobbed by everyone wanting to congratulate him (again) on his Wronksi Feint. Shortly afterwards Remus and Peter returned with Butterbeer and someone conjured up some confetti (possibly accidentally with all of the excitement) which caught in everyone's hair. The snitch that Sirius had caught fluttered around the lights like a golden moth ("What is it with you and stealing the snitch?" James asked, flicking bottle tops at it unsuccessfully). A fifth year had brought a radio down from their dorm and a small group crouched around it, poking it with their wands in an attempt to find a decent station.

Remus dropped onto the sofa next to Lily, causing her to jerk upright.

"Tired?" he asked with a grin.

"Yeah, sorry," she yawned "I got up at half six to go to the library and get some work done before the game."

"Maybe you should go to bed."

"Bed?" Sirius cried, overhearing their conversation "Sleep is for the weak Evans, and today we are winners!"

"Like I could sleep with the racked you lot are making anyway," Lily pointed out. Remus muttered something about how she'd been doing quite a good job a minute ago and got an elbow to the ribs.

"You have to stand up Evans, get moving," Sirius tugged her to her feet "Come on Lily flower, dance with me!"

"I'm good here thanks, dance with someone else," Lily laughed, resisting his attempts to pull her over to where they'd finally gotten the radio playing something loud and upbeat "Your puppy dog eyes don't work on me Black, dance with Remus or someone!"

Remus shot her a look of betrayal as Sirius abandoned his efforts with Lily and turned to him.

"You heard her Moony; our esteemed Head Girl said you should dance with me!" he held his hands out, puppy dog eyes back in full force. Remus groaned.

"Fine, but you owe me one."

Lily had about thirty seconds of peace watching Sirius force Remus into an exaggerated waltz before James took Remus' recently vacated spot, handing her a bottle of Butterbeer.

"Enjoying the party?" he asked, relaxing back into the sofa.

"Of course," Lily grinned as Sirius spun Remus around. Elizabeth and Jenny sat down opposite them, giggling and out of breath from dancing.

"You know Patrick is here?" Jenny informed them excitedly.

"Who?" James asked, confused.

"Patrick? Sixth year, Hufflepuff Beater, Marlene went to Hogsmeade with him last month?"

"What's a Hufflepuff doing here?" he looked over at the dancers, trying to spot him.

"Well, here is a strong word," Eliza laughed.

"He left with Marlene five minutes ago," Jenny explained, raising her eyebrows suggestively.

"Is it wrong to follow them up to the Astronomy Tower and jump out at them?" Elizabeth asked.

"Yes," Lily said firmly "You regretted it last time, remember?"

"I feel like there's a story here…" James said.

"Trust me, you don't want to hear it," Lily shook her head.

"Anyone for Exploding Snap?" Peter took the remaining seat in their corner, pulling out a pack of cards.

Seven violently fast paced rounds later, Lily threw her cards down, yawning widely.

"How the hell do you keep doing that?" Jenny demanded.

"I'm clearly on a winning streak today," James said smugly.

"Are Sirius and Remus still dancing?" Lily asked, looking around.

"I think they've gone," Peter said, collecting the cards together.

"Gone where?" James said. Peter shrugged, and Lily yawned again.

"I think I'm going to go to bed," Lily said, standing up "Night everyone."

"I'm going to go as well actually, before I start losing," James said, stifling a yawn.

He climbed the stairs to the boys' dormitories, grabbing his toothbrush and heading for the bathroom. The next turn on the spiral staircase however revealed two figures, one with their back up against the wall outside the bathroom door, a hand in the other's hair as they kissed. James froze, and then slowly backed away down the stairs, but not before they shifted position and he could see their faces.

"We should go, someone's going to come up to use the bathroom any second," he heard Remus whisper, and all but ran back down the stairs, climbing into bed and pretending to be asleep when he heard them come in. Eventually his faked even breathing slowed his racing heart, but James still couldn't actually fall asleep, even long after everyone else was unconscious. How could he have missed this?


	6. November 1977 (II)

**Sunday 13** **th** **November 1977**

Sirius finished washing his face and opened the bathroom door just as Remus came up the stairs. They stared at each other for a second, both reddening as they remembered the events of the previous night, about four inches to the side of where they were standing right now.

"So that never happened, right?" Sirius said.

"What never happened?"

"Exactly." Sirius ducked past him and headed back down to their dorm to get dressed before going down to breakfast with an uncharacteristically quiet James.

"You okay Prongs?" he asked as he buttered some toast.

"Hmm? Oh yes, fine," James said distractedly.

"Excited for a full day of catching up on all the work we haven't been doing this week?"

James groaned.

"Can we just have another Quidditch match instead?"

"Not a chance," Marlene sat down with them, tugging up her t shirt to show them a spectacular bruise from the bludger.

"You know they invented this thing called bruise cream right?" Sirius asked.

"It looks cool though!" Marlene pulled her shirt back down "… Also I'm all out after practice."

"I can lend you some," Sirius offered.

"Where's Remus this morning?" James asked.

"Right behind you," Remus said, taking a seat on the bench and reaching for the porridge "Ready for homework?"

"Can people just stop talking about homework while I'm trying to eat?"

"I'm guessing that means you haven't started the three foot Transfiguration essay?" Remus said with the smug expression of someone who'd done most of their homework already.

"Oh shit."

* * *

"Well this is a surprise," James turned to see Lily standing behind the table where all four of the Marauders were doing their work, holding a stack of textbooks.

"N.E.W.T.s do strange things to all of us," he said, stretching.

"Sirius Black in the library isn't something I ever thought I'd see though, at least not that since that fourth year incident."

"I did have to sneak in, I'm banned from working in here," Sirius said proudly.

"Of course you are. I've got Astronomy to do anyway, see you," Lily saved and headed off with her books.

Their section of the library was silent except for the scratching of quills for a few minutes.

"So, how's that going then?" Sirius asked.

"How's what going?" Peter looked up from his Charms questions.

"Prongs' Lily plan, obviously."

"We're friends now," James tried not to smile and mostly failed.

"… That's adorable."

"Oh shut up."

"No really, very cute."

"What about you Padfoot, anything going on in your love life? No one you're _mooning_ over?" James saw Remus drop his quill out of the corner of his eye.

"Nope, don't think so," Sirius said lightly as Remus ducked under the table to pick up the quill.

"Then I'm still doing better than you aren't I."

"I'm pretty sure being friends still means that your love life is dead as a dodo."

"Last year she would have hexed me rather than have had that conversation," James pointed out.

"Ah, remember when she turned you green because you were being a jealous dick about Andrew," Sirius reminisced happily.

"I do remember last March, yes."

"I still don't know how she did it, it was incredible."

"We're luck she was in a forgiving mood by the end of the month, else you'd probably still be green, it was impossible to undo," Remus said.

"Best birthday present ever," James paused, and then added more quietly "It's just, I don't know, it's really nice being friends with her."

"Awwww"

"Piss off Padfoot!"

* * *

 **Tuesday 15** **th** **November 1977**

"Right, if everyone could return to their seats please!" Professor McGonagall called over the chatter and laughter of the class as they attempted to transform one another into animals.

"Baa!"

Professor McGonagall waved her wand and the part sheep, part donkey in the middle of the room was replaced with Jenny.

"And this is why focus is important while you cast these spells!"

The bell rang and everyone jumped out of their seats.

"One moment please!" Everyone froze a few inches above their chair.

"On the final Friday of term there will be a brief practical assessment instead of our usual double lesson. You will all have a set time to come to this room in pairs and demonstrate a series of spells, similarly to the N.E.W.T. exam style. I do not expect you all to have mastered human transfiguration by then, but I do wish to see strong evidence of progress, and you will be set individual work for the Christmas holidays based on this. You have one month's warning, and some of you sorely need to get working in that time. My classroom is open for supervised practice of human transfiguration on Wednesday lunch times, I hope I don't need to remind you that anyone found performing dangerous spells on another student – or, indeed, on themselves – without a teacher present will be punished severely. You're all dismissed, don't forget Friday's essay."

They headed towards the Great Hall for lunch, complaining loudly.

"Like we don't have enough work to do without practicing for this as well!" Marlene said grumpily.

"I don't know what you're complaining about; at least you weren't half sheep!"

"No, I just turned you into sheep-donkey woman."

"Maybe we should go tomorrow and get some practice in while it's still quiet. You know everyone else will just leave it until the last few weeks and it'll be packed," Lily suggested.

"This is why you're the sensible one Lily. You might be onto something there though, I don't want a tonne of Transfiguration homework over Christmas," Marlene sighed as they sat down at the Gryffindor table.

"What about you guys, will you be joining us tomorrow for practice?" Jenny asked the Marauders. Sirius glanced around quickly and then pulled out his wand, muttering the incantation under his breath.

"SIRIUS BLACK!" He swore quietly.

"She wasn't even in the room two seconds ago!"

"I distinctly remember saying something about not practicing human transfiguration without supervision," Professor McGonagall was standing behind them, glaring down at Sirius.

"Ah, but you see Professor, you are here, so technically I'm not unsupervised," Sirius looked up hopefully.

"Detention tonight Mr Black, and kindly turn Mr Pettigrew back, I do not believe that he is usually a duck."

Peter quacked.

"Yes Professor, looking forwards to another night with you," Sirius gave McGonagall a winning smile as he undid the spell.

"Always a pleasure Mr Black, but there can be too much of a good thing, let's make this the last one this term shall we?" Professor McGonagall swept away towards the staff table.

"That was unnecessary," Peter muttered, scowling at Sirius.

"Anyway, to answer your question Jenny, no, we will not be joining you tomorrow. As you can see, we're pretty sorted on this one."

"Smug bastard," Elizabeth muttered.

"And proud of it." Sirius grinned at her.

"I'm going to drop stuff in our room and check on Felix before Potions, anyone else coming?" Lily asked, getting up to leave.

"Give me five seconds?" James said around a mouthful of mashed potato "I haven't looked in a few weeks, I keep forgetting," he added after awallowing.

* * *

"Lily?"

"Hmm?" Lily was checking the temperature of the flame beneath her cauldron. The more precisely it was stewed, the better the quality of the final potion.

"What's Felix Felicis supposed to look like at the two month mark?"

"Golden patches, kind of see through ish? When you stir it goes a weird mix of gold and silver. The shinier the better." Lily peered into her cauldron (still not as shiny as Severus' – she'd kind of been hoping that he would stew it incorrectly or something).

"About as sparkly as mud, probably the right colour though," James reported.

"Technically successful, the shininess is pretty much just a measure of how effective it is."

"So I've made a really shitty batch of Felix, but it is actually Felix? I swear it was better before."

"Basically, you'll get an okay grade on it anyway. I expect you got the temperature wrong."

"Could be worse, this one is pink." James was walking around the room looking into other people's cauldrons.

"Not enough Occamy eggshell, probably," Lily stirred her cauldron three times, examining the consistency carefully.

"How do you know all this stuff?"

"I like Potions?" Lily said, shrugging awkwardly.

"Thanks?"

The bell rang, and they headed next door for double Potions, ducking in a minute late and taking the remaining two empty seats at a table in one corner.

"Good afternoon class!" Professor Slughorn waved his wand at the blackboard, instructions appearing in neat script "You all know the drill, it's a double lesson so we're making a potion today. As I told you last week, we will be making Amortentia this afternoon. Love potions are a strictly controlled substance by the Ministry – I think we all trust each other enough that I shouldn't need to search you all on the way out, ha, but any attempts to do anything even slightly out of line with this potion will result in Ministry involvement, so behave yourself! You're all young, you'll meet someone. You'll be working in pairs today, since you need some very expensive ingredients. They won't use this potion in your practical exam, no need to worry, now off you go!"

"Well I guess it's you and me then," James squinted at the instructions on the board as Lily flipped through her textbook to the right page.

"Looks like it… Step one, heat a dry cauldron with a two thousand degree flame," Lily read out, lifting the cauldron up onto its stand "Grind three point seven grams of dried cumin, five grams of hyacinth bulb, two heads of dried lavender and three yarrow leaves into a fine powder. Add to the cauldron and roast well."

"Roast? Really? It's a powder, not a chicken," James snorted, pulling the correct bottles of ingredients over and starting to weigh out the cumin "I'll grind, you start cutting for the next bit? You're good at all this precision stuff."

Lily nodded, pulling out her silver knife, a clean marble board and a crocodile heart and set to taking it apart and separating the sections to be chopped. To her surprise, they worked well together – she guessed she shouldn't be so shocked by now, but everything was going nearly perfectly.

"Dilute half a litre of standard concentration honeywater with two and a half litres of pure water and add to the cauldron once the crocodile heart has turned black… that does not sound like a good thing in a love potion," James went to fetch a bigger measuring cylinder from the cupboard.

"Stir three times clockwise, three anticlockwise, three clockwise and then once anticlockwise." Lily counted as James stirred. The liquid cleared with each round that the stirring rod made until it was so perfectly transparent that they almost couldn't tell there was anything in the cauldron.

"Step fourteen, take the one millimetre diced dandelion root and crush with the flat of a silver blade and add to the cauldron with the petals of ten daisies." James pulled a bunch of daisies from a jug of water and counted out ten. The potion turned a milky white.

"Step… Hang on, this is the last part – we can't be done already, there's still half an hour of class left!" James looked a little panicked "Have we done something wrong?"

"This is the exact colour is should be at this stage according to the textbook, we followed the instructions. Let's just do the last bit and see."

"If you're sure then – add three mint leaves and seven red rose petals into the mixture simultaneously."

They held their breath as the dropped the final ingredients in. James actually gave a little cheer as the potion gained its characteristic mother-of-pearl sheen and the steam rising from the surface began spiralling lazily above the cauldron.

"Oh ho!" This is perfect!" They jumped as Professor Slughorn appeared behind them, leaning over their cauldron and beaming down at them "And done so quickly! Marvellous, marvellous. Leave the potion where it is, clear up your stuff and you're free to go my dears, full marks for today."

They packed away their equipment and returned the leftover ingredients to the cupboard, both taking discreet sniffs of the potion when they thought no one was looking, and left the dungeons (Lily was particularly pleased to note Severus scowling down at his significantly less perfect looking potion. Okay, so maybe she was a little petty when it came to Potions).

"I can't believe this," James said as they climbed the stairs, still grinning widely.

"What?"

"I got full marks! In _Potions_!"

"You get full marks all the time," Lily said, confused.

"Not in Potions I don't. Even when I'm working with Remus I screw something up, and I never spot the ingredient connections in essays."

"Huh. Well, you definitely didn't screw up today."

"Clearly you're just that good at Potions, even I can't bring you down," James teased her.

"More likely, we make a good team," Lily said cheerfully.

"We make a wonderful team. The Prefects won't know what hit them at the next meeting," James joked.

"Speaking of, we should actually set a date for that – we need an end of month meeting to finalise all the ball stuff, both of us need to approve it all before it goes to Professor McGonagall."

"Excellent, your turn to deal with them, I never knew how much people cared about the difference between silver and white tablecloths until now."

"Monday twenty-eighth before mine and Remus' rounds?" she asked, digging her diary from her bag.

"Sure, we can let people know at dinner tonight. I'm going to the library, I've got Ancient Runes after break," James said, pointing in the direction of the library wing.

"I'll see you later then, I've got to go get my homework from my room," Lily waved and turned up the stairs towards Gryffindor Tower.

* * *

 **Saturday 26** **th** **November 1977**

"There's one hell of a storm going on out there," James announced gleefully at breakfast. Sirius very pointedly looked at the enchanted ceiling above them.

"I never would have guessed. You realise we still have to sit out there in that?"

"Yes, but we aren't flying in it, and Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff are, so hopefully that'll keep the scores down," James was calculating possible outcomes of the match in the margins of Lily's Daily Prophet (she'd long since given up on actually reading it).

"Chill James, we're supposed to go enjoy ourselves watching the match today remember?" Marlene pointed out.

"Well we know you'll be enjoying yourself," Jenny smirked "I hear Patrick is getting a third date?"

"You hear correctly, stop gossiping with the Hufflepuffs."

"Going to go cheer him up in the showers when they inevitably lose?" Sirius winked at her.

"Quidditch shit talk _and_ a sexual comment, you're reaching new lows there Black." Marlene rolled her eyes.

"What am I thinking, of course Hufflepuff will lose," James muttered, crossing out a few lines and failing to notice Lily stifling a laugh.

"Remus still visiting his mother?" she asked.

"Yeah, he should be back tonight, she's on the up again apparently," Sirius said as they stood to go outside, wrapping themselves in warm winter cloaks and waterproofs.

"Well that's good news then."

"Anyone remember the waterproofing spell?" Peter said, pulling out his wand.

" _Impervius_ to repel water," Lily said, and they made their way out of the front doors into the driving rain. The sky flashed with lightning, and they all shivered even in all their layers as they half ran across the lawns to the stands.

"Why are we doing this again," Lily stammered through chattering teeth, squashed up on the bench with Marlene, Jenny and Elizabeth for warmth.

"It's Quidditch!" James said as though this explained everything, peering down at the pitch through the rain. The players were yellow or blue blurs, and judging by their movements none of them could see much of anything either. Most of the commentary was lost over the thunder, now worryingly close and increasingly frequent.

"I hope they catch the Snitch soon so we can all go inside," Eliza huddled in closer to the others.

"You're kidding right… They can barely even see the Quaffle, never mind the Snitch." Lily strained to hear the score.

"- zero all, both teams have yet to score at the thirty minute mark!" She groaned.

* * *

"Well, that was embarrassing," Sirius said, shaking his head "Just tragic."

"Poor Hufflepuff," James added.

"I mean, you can't really call that a demonstration of skill. The Snitch pretty much flew into the Ravenclaw Seeker's head," Marlene snorted.

"One hundred and fifty to zero though," James said.

"The weather didn't give them much of a chance," said Lily, trying to be nice about it.

"Still, the Chasers' job in this weather is so much easier than the Seeker's that they really should manage to score… well, something!" Sirius argued.

"We shouldn't complain really, they got the least points that they possibly could have, that can only be good for winning the cup," Marlene said.

"True," James brightened "We have a one hundred and forty point lead!"

"Hufflepuff are going to be vicious after that loss though, they've got a lot of motivation to do well in March – they'll want to prove that they can do better than that," Sirius pointed out.

"We just have to keep training hard next year, that'll have killed the confidence of all their new players," James said.

"Poor them." Lily rolled over to warm her other side in front of the fire.

"Shouldn't you be off comforting Patrick, Marley?" Jenny asked. Marlene just stuck her tongue out in response.

* * *

 **Monday 28** **th** **November 1977**

So we've been thinking," Sirius and the rest of the Marauders sat down opposite Lily, Marlene, Jenny and Elizabeth at dinner that night.

"Sirius Black? Thinking? Quick, someone write this down," Marlene gasped in shock.

"Very funny McKinnon, but anyway, we have a proposal for you, since it's nearly December."

Marlene and Lily spoke at the same time:

"I'm flattered, but I don't think we're really there yet."

"Twenty seven days until Christmas!"

"If you'd let me finish… it's a Secret Santa proposition. Kind of," said Sirius.

"… Kind of?" Lily asked.

"Sirius likes to overcomplicate everything," James rolled his eyes.

"This is the first time we've had enough of us to bother with Secret Santa Prongs, don't rain on my parade!"

"You just like unwrapping things," Remus said.

"ANYWAY," Sirius said loudly "If you're in, and obviously you're in because my plans are always fantastic, everyone gets two names instead of one and that's actually it because they wouldn't let me change anything else."

"Just say yes, we'll never heard the end of it otherwise," Remus advised.

"Sounds fun, why not," Jenny said cheerfully.

"If it's Christmas I'm in," said Lily.

"Excellent, we can draw names tonight?" Sirius suggested.

"Can't," Lily said as James shook his head "Prefect's meeting and then me and Remus have duty."

"We'll do it whenever we're all around, after dinner sometime or whatever. We can't go to Hogsmeade for a few weeks anyway, it's not urgent," Remus said "But right now we should be getting going."

"Why does this place have to have so many stairs?" Lily complained as they made their way up to the third floor. They were the first to arrive at the classroom, and James headed straight for the blackboard and picked up the chalk.

"If we write everything down that they already agreed on before they get here, they can't try and change everything by pretending they don't remember just because they disagree with the decision," he explained. Lily snorted.

"Right, this is the final meeting for the ball. Straight after this I'm going to Professor McGonagall and then nothing changes, so speak now or forever hold your peace," James stood at the front of the room, looking as though the first person who suggested a change would regret it. Everyone promptly started shouting at once.

"Well that was painful," James lay across a desk as Lily copied the final plan off of the board.

"Don't be dramatic," she rolled her eyes "It was fine! Other than the tinsel thing, clearly they're ridiculous, it's not Christmas without tinsel."

"Unfortunately for you, it was voted too tacky for the ball," Remus leaned over Lily's shoulder "Is that supposed to be the Great Hall?"

"Don't mock my drawing abilities."

"It's a rectangle and a bunch of little circles, how do you mess that up?" James asked.

"Do you want to do it?"

"Nah, your weird squiggles will do just fine."

Lily wrote a last few lines and dropped the roll of parchment on James.

"Right, you have your meeting with McGonagall, we have rounds to do, let's get going."

* * *

 **Thursday 1** **st** **December 1977**

The first morning of December was appropriately cold and frosty. Lily, Remus and James yawned over their breakfast after a late night helping out with the decoration of the castle, but Lily was smiling despite her tiredness. The banisters of every staircase were wound with garlands of holly and ivy, the statues and suits of armour were hung with tinsel, and giant baubles hung from the ceilings of all the corridors. Not one inch of the castle was un-Christmasified (she had even snuck some tinsel around the mirrors in every bathroom she passed). The peak though was in the Great Hall; the usual twelve enormous real Christmas trees lined the walls, each one individually decorated, with live fairies perched on the branches. Wreaths of holly and mistletoe hung from the walls.

A flurry of noise and movement on the far side of the hall signalled the arrival of the usual morning owl post. Lily looked up excitedly as a slim rectangular package landed in front of her.

"Excellent, they remembered to send it," she ripped off the paper.

"What's that?" Sirius asked curiously.

"It's a Muggle advent calendar!" Lily searched for the day one door.

"Huh. That's weird."

"Weird with chocolate though," she popped out a chocolate Christmas tree "My parents send me one every year."

"Hi, I'm here, sorry!" Peter dropped down on the bench next to them.

"We've still got time before Defence, don't worry Wormtail," Remus pushed the rack of toast towards him.

"Right," Sirius said, shaking his black pointed hat to mix the slips of paper "Now that we're all finally here, we can pull the names! Everyone take two, ladies first!"

He offered the hat to Marlene, who took hers and passed it along.

"I've got two the same," Sirius sighed as he unfolded the last two "Drop them back in people, try again…"

Four attempts later, everyone finally had two different names that weren't their own.

"Everyone has to anonymously sneak their presents under the tree in Gryffindor common room by Christmas morning, keep your names secret on pain of a horrible death-"

"Yeah, Sirius is going to sing," James interrupted.

"- don't spend too much, have fun, also we're late for Defence," Sirius finished.

"Oh shit." They all dived for their bags and sped out of the hall towards the Defence Against the Dark Arts classroom.

"Who'd you get?" Jenny whispered to Lily as they dashed through the corridors.

"Are you kidding me, I overheard Sirius in the shower once, I'm not risking this," Lily muttered back "Anyway, it's more fun this way!"

"How did you manage to hear Sirius showering in the boys' bathroom?"

"When he used the girls'."

"Oh wow…" Jenny pulled a face.

"I've seen things."

There was a pause and a raised eyebrow from Jenny.

"… Above the waist things," Lily clarified.

Professor Earley didn't seem to know what to do about half of the class turning up late, so she just muttered under her breath and started the lesson again.

They were studying theory for the first hour of the class, so most of their minds drifted towards ideas for the Secret Santa. They had a week and a half to brainstorm before the final Hogsmeade trip of the term.

* * *

"What the hell am I supposed to get for Peter," Jenny complained, collapsing back onto her bed.

"You could start by not cheating and telling us that you pulled Peter out!" Lily said.

"What, are you telling me all of you are actually going to stick to this secrecy thing?"

"Yeah." "Yep." "Of course!"

"Nerds."

"So you're not telling us your other person?" Marlene said.

"It's one of us then, isn't it?" Eliza asked.

"You're the ones who want to keep it secret; I'm not saying a word!"

"Does anyone have ideas yet?" Lily swapped her textbooks out of her bag for Friday morning's work.

"I think I'm pretty sorted already," Eliza said "I got pretty straightforward people though."

"Yeah, I've got a couple of ideas for mine as well, Remus – shit, pretend I didn't say that," Marlene hid her face in her hands.

"Ooh, I've got Remus too, we should check we're not getting him the same thing," Eliza moved over to sit on Marlene's bed and whisper with her.

"Nice going guys, less than twelve hours in and three names outed already," Lily rolled her eyes, pulling out a book and leaning back against her pillows.

"I'll get them all out of you before Christmas," Jenny grinned.


	7. December 1977 (I)

**Saturday 3** **rd** **December 1977**

It seemed to James as though everything was speeding up and slowing down simultaneously. There were only two weeks left of term, little problems with the ball kept popping up left right and centre and it always seemed to be his job to deal with them, he had to supervise another lunchtime detention, Professor McGonagall had given them all times and partners for their test, and Christmas just seemed to be approaching very fast. He could hardly believe nearly a whole term had passed by already – it was all a blur of work and Head Boy duties and Quidditch.

On the other hand, the days until the end of term seemed to be crawling by. There weren't enough hours in the day for everything else, but most lessons felt like they lasted a week.

And then there was Lily. Head Girl, actually his friend now, said they made a good team Lily Evans, whose name he'd drawn for Secret Santa. A year ago he could have given her a bunch of roses, a box of chocolates and a defensively jokey declaration of love (and did, in fact), but now he had to find something that she would actually want.

They'd mostly avoided discussing the Secret Santa among the Marauders, since Sirius was threatening anyone who hinted that the might let something slip, but James had gathered that they pretty much all knew what they were doing, which made him feel about ten times worse about not knowing what to get Lily.

"Here, this came with the post for you," Sirius pushed a package towards James as he joined them at breakfast. He sat down and helped himself to porridge, eggs and bacon.

"Not going to open it?" Marlene said curiously.

"It's just my dress robes, I forgot I'd need them this term, don't get excited. Where's Remus?"

"Already off with Lily, study date Saturday." Sirius rolled his eyes.

* * *

"How's your Secret Santa coming along?" Lily asked, searching the shelves for a helpful looking Arithmancy book.

"Better than this bloody Charms essay," Remus grumbled "I think I know what I'm getting anyway, how's yours?"

"Hmm. One easy, one complicated."

"So you got James then?"

"Yeah," Lily groaned and pulled three textbooks from the shelves at random, dropping them onto the table.

"I was kidding but okay, wow, that's some coincidence there."

"What's that supposed to mean?!"

"You got James… It's like in one of Jenny's books."

"How do you know the plot of every single one of Jenny's Christmas romance novels?" Lily teased.

"Never you mind," Remus flushed "Don't change the subject here. It's clearly fate, capital 'D' Destiny, written in the stars – hey!" Lily had thrown a roll of parchment at him.

"Does this mean you aren't going to be helpful?"

"And risk Sirius' wrath? You're on your own this time Lily."

"Damn you. I'll settle for coffee?"

"Fine, once I've for the first run at this essay done," Remus said.

It took three cups of coffee and half of the day until Lily could tick the Arithmancy essay off her to do list. She sighed as she looked at everything still left.

"You'd think they'd lay off a bit, with Christmas coming up," she said, pulling her Herbology notes towards her and searching for the most recent.

"It's N.E.W.T. year, relaxation is a myth." Remus had abandoned his Charms essay in favour of a nasty looking Ancient Runes translation.

"And next Saturday we won't have any time at all to do work, we've got loads to do in Hogsmeade," Lily groaned. The prospect of a day off was theoretically wonderful, but the thought of all the work that would be waiting for them killed the excitement a little.

"Half the teachers don't expect anything much from us in the last week though usually, and then it'll be the holidays and we'll have plenty of time for everything – can you read this?"

"I didn't take Ancient Runes Remus," Lily leant over to see his parchment.

"Oh, this is English, James' handwriting is appalling sometimes, it's from when I was visiting home," Remus said, squinting down at the notes.

"How's your mother doing anyway?" Lily asked.

"She's doing okay apparently, but they never tell me until it's really bad, so who knows," Remus kept his eyes on his work as he lied to her, but the groundwork needed setting to explain away a Christmas Day absence and, well, she had asked. It wasn't like the truth was an option.

* * *

 **Friday 9** **th** **December 1977**

"If everyone could pay attention," Professor McGonagall frowned at the class, half of whom were staring blankly at the wall or looking out of the window "Last time I checked, the Christmas holidays didn't start for another week."

Sirius forced his attention back to the front of the room and tried to focus on the blackboard and the wand movement diagrams drawn on it, but seconds later any hope was lost.

"It's snowing!" someone shouted, and there was a flurry of movement towards the windows on one side of the classroom.

"Everyone back in your seats!" Professor McGonagall snapped. They reluctantly sat back down, everyone glancing out of the windows whenever McGonagall's back was turned to write on the board.

Eventually the bell rang, and they all rushed out of the room. James sighed: bad weather mean spending break time supervising the younger years in an empty classroom somewhere, where they would all inevitably be loud and bouncing off the walls and there was a decent chance that Peeves would make an appearance.

By the time James, Remus and Peter made their way down to the greenhouses for Herbology the lawn was covered in a light layer of snow and it showed no sign of stopping.

"Do you think they'll cancel Care of Magical Creatures if this keeps up?" Peter asked.

"I swear Professor Kettleburn doesn't cancel lessons until it's less than zero degrees outside, don't get our hopes up Wormy."

* * *

Within three hours everything was covered in a thick carpet of smooth snow, with a few paths leading from the castle to the greenhouses. Some first and second years had built lumpy snowmen near the front doors during lunch, the colours of the house scarves wrapped around their necks already obscured by the snow.

To absolutely no one's surprise (except possibly Professor Kettleburn, who continued talking about the dangers of the Billywig), that afternoon's Care of Magical Creatures lesson quickly devolved into a snowball fight. Marlene might have technically started it by flicking bits of snow at Sirius, but he was definitely responsible for the rest after he used magic to launch snowballs at the Slytherins.

The air was filled with shrieks, laughter and flying snow, until everyone was dripping wet and shivering from the cold. Professor Kettleburn eventually gave in and finished the lesson early, letting them all go back inside and defrost.

"Exciting lesson then?" Remus raised his eyebrows as they joined him around the fire in the common room.

"Wild. You'll be shocked to hear that Padfoot started it." James grinned.

"Did not!"

"Did so!"

"Oh my god what are you, twelve?" Lily laughed.

"Shh, the weekend starts here, I can be as immature as I want." James stuck his tongue out.

"Speak for yourself," Marlene groaned "Me and Pete still have Muggle Studies."

"And I've got Divination," Sirius added.

"Ah well, we can sit here and plan our Hogsmeade trip while you lot are working," James said smugly.

"More like we can sit here and do work so that we actually have time to go," said Lily "You realised we have a whole extra essay on Billywigs now right?"

"Spoilsport," James sighed, but he got his textbook, parchment, quill and ink out of his bag anyway.

The common room emptied, filled and emptied again for dinner while they all worked.

"You know Earth has one moon, not three right?" Lily peered down at James' Astronomy diagrams.

"I knew there was a reason not to try and do all my homework at once," James scratched two moons out with his quill "At least mine don't look like potatoes."

"That's actually what Mars' moons look like though!" Lily protested, shoving the textbook at him "Look!"

"No one ever told me I would need to do colouring for N.E.W.T.s so often," Jenny muttered as she sketched.

"What are you all complaining about, drawing a map of the Solar System is the easiest end of term homework ever. Isn't that like, O.W.L. level or something anyway?" Marlene scowled down at her Muggle Studies essay "Lily, what do Muggles do for fun? I have to write about a week of my life as a Muggle."

"Football for you probably. And you try memorising all of Jupiter's moons, there's millions."

"That's that sport right? How do you play?"

"No idea," Lily shrugged, dotting in a bunch of tiny rocks.

"Can we go to dinner before we all starve to death?" Sirius asked a little later, shoving his work away. Everyone quickly abandoned their homework in favour of food.

"So what's the plan for tomorrow?" asked James once they were all sat in the Great Hall with food.

"We're splitting up for an hour or so of Christmas shopping, and then we're all going dress shopping," Lily said promptly.

"All of us?" Peter squeaked.

"All of the girls Pete, we've got our dress robes," Remus rolled his eyes "We could meet at the Three Broomsticks afterwards for Butterbeer?"

"Sure, say about three?" Marlene suggested.

"Right then, this homework isn't going to do itself. I want to get a few books from the library first, anyone else?" Elizabeth stood up to go.

* * *

 **Saturday 10** **th** **December 1977**

In contrast to the previous day, as they ate breakfast that morning the clouds cleared to leave bright blue skies and sunshine. By the time the students were ready to leave for Hogsmeade yesterday's snow had turned to slush.

"My feet are soaked already," Marlene complained halfway down the pathway from the castle to the front gates.

"You'd thing with all this magic they'd at least clear the paths," Lily said "And also that you'd remember to use a waterproofing spell on your shoes like the rest of us." Marlene swore at her.

"Where are the guys anyway, aren't they coming down with us?" Jenny asked.

"Probably still asleep, they don't have as much to do," Marlene said, immediately followed by "Oh shit!"

"What?"

"I've forgotten my money…"

They all groaned, and turned back to the castle.

"Well, at least we caught it before we left properly," Lily said.

"And I can get my gloves." Elizabeth's hands were buried in the pockets of her woollen cloak.

They speed walked up to Gryffindor Tower and then back out to the gates.

"Right, if anyone else is missing something they can keep their mouth shut, I'm freezing," said Jenny.

Eventually the village of Hogsmeade appeared ahead of them, looking as usual like it belonged on the front of a postcard. Smoke rose from almost all the chimneys and the roofs were covered in neat blankets of snow. They unwound their scarves and pulled off hats and gloves as they reached the first buildings, warm from the exertion of walking uphill.

"Right, we meet back here at half twelve, don't forget to hide everything you buy," Elizabeth said.

"Jenny," Marlene faked a cough.

"Hey, that was one time!"

"No arguing now, there's Christmas shopping to be done!" Lily grinned.

They all waved as they went their separate ways. Eliza knew exactly what she was getting, it couldn't have been any easier, but she had a few hours to kill so she walked off at a sedate pace and relaxed as she browsed the fiction section of the bookshop.

Marlene was winging it for one of her recipients – she knew she could find _something_ perfect, she just didn't actually know what it was. She wandered around Scrivenshaft's and the potion supplies shop, wanting to leave Remus' present until last so she didn't have to carry it around so much.

At least half of Jenny's mind was on what kind of dress she wanted for the call. She'd had a stroke of genius for the Peter problem, and her other was – as they'd guessed – one of her dorm mates, so it was just a matter of going and buying the things she'd decided on, and maybe picking some nice wrapping paper. Ball gowns were a much more pressing matter right now.

Lily usually loved Christmas shopping. And it wasn't that she didn't love it this year, but she was also still hopelessly stuck. She'd been brainstorming all week and gotten virtually nowhere outside of 'everyone likes chocolate'. Honeydukes was bursting with people, popular as ever, and she squeezed in to look for anything interesting she could send back home to her parents and Tuney… although actually, Lily thought, maybe not Petunia. There had been a letter from her mother last weekend gushing over how 'that lovely Vernon' had proposed. Lily had met him last summer, and decided that he was possibly the most boring person she'd ever met, including Professor Binns. He mostly liked to talk about himself, his prospects selling drills, himself, things that made him angry, himself, and his wish for a nice (boring) house with a perfect front lawn and a very shiny car.

Someone knocked her elbow and she jumped, returning her attention to the shelves of sweets. Every Flavour Beans were a favourite of her father's, and Ice Mice looked like they would go down well. She added a box of Glacial Snowflakes for something seasonal and paid, then weaved her way between the shoppers to get out. The cold hit her hard after the warmth of Honeydukes, and she hurried straight into the nearest possibly helpful looking shop.

* * *

"You finished already Moony?" Remus looked up to see Sirius standing over him.

"Yeah, figured I'd do some reading while I waited," he lifted his book up briefly to show Sirius.

"On a bench outside? We've got nearly two hours before we meet everyone else yet, you'll freeze to death."

"The other option was sitting on my own in the Three Broomsticks."

"Well your knight in shining armour is here, since I am also free now – and I have a much better idea than the Three Broomsticks, we're getting Butterbeer later anyway." Sirius grabbed Remus' cold hand with his own warm gloved one and tugged until he relented and stood up.

"What idea is that then?"

"Come with me and you'll see, won't you?" Sirius lead him through the village without dropping his hand. It's just because he's warm, Remus told himself, your hands are cold and his are warm because he's not stupid enough to sit outside without gloves, otherwise you'd stop this straight away, since you both agreed that dating was a bad idea and really you're over it.

"Oh no way."

"What? You love their hot chocolate!"

"I'm not going on a date with you!"

"Date? Who said anything about a date?" Sirius was grinning "I just know how much you like the hot chocolate here. And those little chocolate tarts."

"Those tarts are shaped like hearts; the only people who go to Madam Puddifoot's are couples!"

"Do you want warm, delicious chocolatey goodness or not?"

"Sirius."

"With whipped cream and teeny tiny marshmallows?"

"… Fine." Remus shook his head as he followed Sirius into the café. Every table was for two, the walls were a pale pink, hearts featured strongly and literally everyone around them was on a date (including more than a few awkward first ones), but this was clearly completely platonic. Remus was here for the hot chocolate. He was dating the hot chocolate, not Sirius. And wow, that was a new low for inane thoughts and he should really stop now. They were seated at a table next to the window (Remus crossed his fingers and hoped that James or Peter or literally anyone else they knew wasn't going to walk past), and he picked up the (heart shaped) menu for something to do with his hands. He tried to ignore the couple next to them, who were glued at the lips over their little round table.

After a while though, once he had an enormous mug of hot chocolate with a mountain of whipped cream and enough mini marshmallows to nearly hide the whole thing, and a plate of mini chocolate tarts and cakes on the table between them, Remus started to forget about the fact that they were in _Madam Puddifoot's_ of all places. They fell back into their usual pattern of conversation, homework and Quidditch and how stupid their friends were, joking and laughing (and maybe, just maybe the tiniest bit of flirting). Their knees were slotted together in the cramped space under the table and if Remus leaned forwards more than an inch he could feel the warmth of Sirius' breath.

They left with plenty of time to get to the Three Broomsticks to meet the others, both hiding smiles as they walked out of the tea shop.

"So, I feel like I might want to no go on another date with you sometime," Sirius said. Remus rolled his eyes, but…

"That might not be the worst idea you've ever had," he conceded.

* * *

"Why does Hogwarts seem to have ten times as many students as soon as you go to Hogsmeade at Christmas?" Marlene was the last to arrive at the meeting point, only five minutes late and carrying plain brown paper bags to disguise her purchases "Everyone ready?"

"How bad is this going to be?" Elizabeth muttered.

"Clearly you've been doing it wrong if you think it'll be bad," Jenny informed her, linking their arms as they walked down the main street towards Gladrags Wizardwear "We are definitely going to have fun, you'll see."

They climbed the stairs to the upper floor of the shop, where the formal wear was. Dresses of every colour and style hung from racks filling most of the room, and at the very back there was a small mirror lined area, two changing rooms and a few chairs. The store was surprisingly empty – a lot of people had prepared in advance and brought dresses with them to Hogwarts, and it was around lunchtime now. They dumped their bags of presents next to the chairs and began wandering up and down the rows.

"Is Patrick alright with us stealing you away for the ball Marley?" Eliza asked.

"Oh he's thrilled, he hates dancing," Marlene said happily. The four of them had decided to go as a group this year without dates, since it was their last Christmas at Hogwarts. "He's agreed to do one song with me and then he plans to enjoy the inevitably spiked punch for the rest of the evening."

"You don't think James being Head Boy might keep the punch non-alcoholic for once?"

"No one can stop Sirius from doing anything if he really wants to – and really, what's the point of unspiked punch?"

* * *

"What do you reckon the chances of us finishing by three are?" Marlene asked after nearly half an hour had passed without anyone even taking a dress off the rack.

"Okay, that's it. Everyone grab any two dresses and try them on, now," Jenny ordered, picking two seemingly at random as she headed towards the changing rooms. The others exchanged glances but followed suit.

Since only two people could change at a time, Marlene and Eliza sat outside as Lily and Jenny got dressed. It quickly became apparent that their quick decisions had interesting results, and a few minutes later the four of them were standing in front of the mirrors, gasping with laughter.

"I'm pretty sure this is a wedding dress," Marlene twisted to see behind her better "Yep, it's got a train. Who has a green wedding dress?"

"Lily, if that dress clashed anymore with your hair I'd be blind."

"I don't know, I think I can pull it off." Lily grinned, lifting her skirts and spinning in a bright orange dress that Marlene had handed her.

"This isn't too bad actually," Eliza said "Maybe not something strapless though, it feels like it might fall down at any second."

"Sticking charms are your friend," Jenny said cheerfully.

"… Yes, I can't see anything that could possibly go wrong with that."

They pulled out more and more ridiculous dresses alongside the occasional serious suggestion, posing dramatically in front of the mirrors. The shop assistant came up once to check if they needed any help, but otherwise their search for the perfect dresses went uninterrupted. The afternoon sped by, and it was gone quarter past three by the time they headed to the Three Broomsticks to meet the Marauders, awkwardly carrying all of their purchases.

"Nice of you to join us," James said as they all shuffled up to fit everyone around the table.

"Sorry, dress shopping overran a bit," Lily apologised.

"We guessed," Sirius extricated himself from the corner where he was sitting next to Remus "Eight Butterbeers?" he checked before heading up to the bar.

"So, everyone get their Secret Santa sorted?" Remus asked. There was a lot of nodding and general agreement.

"Don't forget everyone, hide your wrapping paper and have your handwriting charms at the ready. We're having _complete_ anonymity until afterwards!" Sirius returned to the table. Peter looked mildly alarmed.

"Calm down Sirius, no one is going to start analysing all of the presents," James rolled his eyes.

"Are you telling me you couldn't recognise Lily's handwriting within three seconds?"

"… Shut up Padfoot."

"He's got a point though," Lily said.

"Are you really siding with Sirius?!" James shook his head in disbelief "What is the world coming to?"

"It's Christmas! And Secret Santa is supposed to be, well, secret!"

"So you're saying that this is our Christmas miracle?"

"You're ridiculous."

They were briefly interrupted by Madam Rosmerta with their Butterbeer.

"Anyone do anything today that they're actually allowed to talk about?" Elizabeth asked. There was a pause during which Lily distinctly saw Sirius and Remus (sitting opposite her) exchange a look before Peter started telling them what he'd bought for his parents.

* * *

"We should go, we don't want to be late for dinner," James said, but made no move to leave. The idea of walking all the way back to the castle wasn't particularly appealing at this stage.

"We've got ages yet, we haven't been here long," Sirius waved his hand dismissively.

"It's gone five."

"What the fuck? There's no way we've been here for two hours!" Sirius exclaimed.

"That's your third drink," Lily pointed out as they all unwillingly got to their feet and gathered up all of their bags.

They dragged their aching feet for the entire long walk back to Hogwarts, where they dumped their stuff on the bed and went back down the Great Hall for dinner.

"Could I have the names of any students intending to stay for the Christmas holidays please!" Professor McGonagall was making her way down Gryffindor table with parchment and quill in hand, calling over the chatter. They all signed up when she reached their group, as most of the older students were doing because of the Christmas ball.

"Did you get Slughorn's invitation this morning Lily?" Remus asked, remembering as he spotted the Potions teacher at the staff table.

"Yeah, you're coming right?"

"Definitely, the rumours about the guests are pretty interesting this year. I'm guessing none of you lot want to come?" he added, looking around.

"Slughorn's Christmas party?" Sirius said, mouth full.

"You're disgusting, but yes."

"My darling brother and Snivellus still on the guest list?"

"Unfortunately."

"Fuck no then."

"I'm almost ready for sleep already." Lily yawned, leaning against Marlene.

"Mmm, walking is tiring. Shopping is tiring. I'm so tired," Jenny agreed.

* * *

"Do you have a date for Slughorn's party then?" Eliza asked once they were back in their dorm getting ready for bed. Lily paused by the door, toothbrush in hand.

"No, do you want to come?"

"Not a chance, I can find better ways to celebrate the end of term – I meant a _date_ with a cute guy!"

"Oh. No, me and Remus are going it alone I think."

"You should ask James, since he is both a guy and cute," Jenny suggested.

"In all fairness, so is Remus," Eliza pointed out "But you two are already so platonically married these days, it'd sickening if it wasn't adorable."

"Seriously, Severus goes, there'd be a full scale fight in ten minutes," Lily snorted, deciding to ignore Eliza's comment.

"So you'd ask him otherwise?"

"That's not what I said! No!"

"You're not denying that he's cute though," Marlene pointed out as she pulled on her pyjamas.

"I- well- that's not the point!" Lily spluttered.

"It is so the point. You think James is cuuuute," Marlene mocked in a sing song voice.

"Piss off!"

"Not until you answer."

"Fine! He's not unattractive, so what?!"

"Sooooo you should ask him to Slughorn's party," Eliza said exasperatedly as Jenny pretended to faint backwards onto her bed and proclaimed that she thought she'd 'never live to see this day!'.

"Because he would say no? Not that I'd want him to say yes – and he'd still fight with Severus, it'd be a disaster…" Lily trailed off, aware that she was rambling.

"One, bullshit," Marlene began "Two, also bullshit. Three – well, fair enough, but it'd liven the evening up a bit at least, those things sound boring as hell Lily."

"Not bullshit!" Lily protested.

"Totally bullshit."

"I was actually thinking of asking Will, if you must know," she blurted out, surprising herself most of all.

"That hot Ravenclaw prefect, our year?" Jenny asked, sitting bolt upright.

"Well he is the only Will we know." And yes, he was incredibly good looking, and smart, and she enjoyed talking to him… but she certainly hadn't been planning on asking him out on a date of any kind.

"Where did this come from?" Eliza still looked shocked.

"We've literally spent most of the past few years discussing how ridiculously perfect he would be for Lily," Jenny reminded her.

"Yes, but when have either of them ever looked like they might do something about it?"

"I thought he might go for it to be fair, when she stopped fighting with James it threw him a bit though. I reckon if he'd made Head Boy…"

"Yeah, good point, that was a surprise."

"Hello, still right here guys?" Lily shook her head at them.

"Sorry. Are you really going to ask him though?" Eliza asked.

"If I see him, probably. We've had a lot of Prefects stuff together recently," Lily shrugged, and left to use the bathroom and brush her teeth before bed. As she closed the door behind her she could hear the whispering start. "-but James!" someone hissed, and her stomach did a weird twisty thing. Definitely too much dinner, she thought to herself as she climbed the stairs.


	8. December 1977 (II)

**Friday 16** **th** **December 1977**

Finally, after a long week of lessons and homework, the final Friday of term arrived. It was the third day in a row that the castle remained coated in white, with light snow showers appearing every now and then, and everything felt wonderfully festive.

"I love Hogwarts," Lily sighed happily at breakfast that morning "There's always a white Christmas here."

"How can you be so cheerful with McGonagall's mock exam this morning?" Marlene asked, open Transfiguration textbook propped against a jug of pumpkin juice in front of her. She, like many of the other seventh years taking the Transfiguration N.E.W.T., was frantically reading over all the things they'd covered last year, after Professor McGonagall had reminded them that the N.E.W.T. was taught over two years and they would obviously be tested on all of the content.

"What time's yours?" Sirius was reading Marlene's textbook over her shoulder.

"Nine thirty with Jenny, you?"

"Me and James are at nine."

"We've got until half ten," Eliza said smugly as she did her own last minute revision in a much more relaxed manner.

"If you're going to be like that about it we won't come back and tell you what it's on," Sirius said.

"Lily won't cheat on anything, so it doesn't really make much difference," Eliza shrugged "Anyway, McGonagall always uses different questions."

Jenny joined them at the Gryffindor table at that point, notably without any Transfiguration revision.

"Is it too early to give up?" she filled her plate with bacon, scrambled eggs and toast.

"Probably – but you'll be fine anyway, you've done loads of work," Lily said reassuringly.

"It'd better be fine, I don't want to end up being turned into something horrible," Marlene muttered.

"Whatever, what happens happens at this point. It's the end of term either way."

"Oooh, that's a point Lily, did you get anything sorted for tonight?" Eliza asked.

"What about tonight?" Sirius said.

"Slughorn's Christmas party, Lily was going to ask Will." Lily went red.

"Oh was she?" Sirius raised an eyebrow.

"I did, as a matter of fact. We're meeting in the Entrance Hall tonight," she said calmly.

James swore loudly.

"… Are you alright?"

"Yep, just fine, banged my knee on the table that's all," he wheezed, clutching his knee.

"Well, we should get going if we don't want to be late for the test," Sirius said suddenly, standing up. They left the hall (James still cursing and bending to rub his knee every few seconds), a baffled Lily staring after them.

* * *

"That wasn't too bad, all things considered," Lily said as she walked back towards the Gryffindor common room with Eliza after their mock practical exam "I was mostly a cat."

"Yeah, McGonagall seemed pretty happy. I mean, it's hard to tell, since she never smiles, but she didn't do that face that means you've screwed up horribly and should start preparing to see a T on your grades."

They climbed through the portrait hole and found the others sitting around the fire relaxing.

"Herbology and Care of Magical Creatures are cancelled because of all the snow," Sirius informed them as they sat down.

"Excellent, only Charms left today for most of us then!" Eliza said.

"And only nine days until Christmas," Lily added happily.

"And it's only nine hours until your date."

Lily rolled her eyes.

"It's not a big deal; I don't know why you're all getting so worked up about it."

"Lily, you've been on dates with one guy in the whole time we've known you, and it's not exactly for lack of offers," Jenny pointed out. Sirius snorted and James stood up suddenly.

"I'm going to go upstairs and wrap presents, I'm guessing Sirius will stop anyone from following me." He all but ran towards the boys' dormitory.

"True – from an 'I am deeply gay and not at all interested in you' standpoint, you're a good looking girl Evans, and most of the people in this school have noticed that," said Sirius.

"Thanks… I think?"

"You're welcome. Now, anyone for a few games of Exploding Snap?"

"I have to finish my Charms essay," Peter said sadly.

"Seriously? Ah well, everyone else will play with me right?"

There was a brief pause.

"I don't know why we're all thinking about this like we have any better options," Marlene sighed "Sure, let's play."

* * *

"Give us a spin," Jenny ordered as Lily headed towards the spiral staircase down to the common room.

"Lovely. Have fun-"

"Stay safe!" Marlene grinned.

"Home by midnight!" Eliza joked.

"To tell us everything, of course," Jenny added.

"They grow up so fast," she heard Marlene coo as she left.

"Yes mother, don't wait up!" Lily called back over her shoulder.

And okay, maybe originally she'd intended to go to the party alone and get a little on the tipsy side with Remus if things were boring. But now she had a date – a very cute, funny and generally quite perfect date – and she'd be damned if she wasn't going to enjoy herself just because James Potter was acting weird. Which he definitely was. Not that she cared. Every time Will came up in conversation, James had left or gone unusually quiet. Sirius and Remus were acting a bit strangely about it as well, but nowhere near as oddly as James.

But it wasn't like he was interested anymore, he hadn't done anything to indicate romance all term – maybe he was one of those guys who was a bit protective over his friends? (Because they were friends now. They'd spent six years in some kind of love-hate state, and now everything was nice and platonically settled and she was perfectly happy with the way it had turned out). Or maybe just surprised? Everyone had seemed to be (kind of unfairly) surprised that Lily had gone and gotten a date to the party. She'd been out with Andrew plenty of times last year, it wasn't totally unprecedented.

Lily was so wrapped up in her own internal conversation that she nearly walked right into a tall figure wearing smart black dress robes.

"Alright there Lily?" Will caught her arm as she regained her balance.

"Hey, um, yeah, sorry. Off in my own world," she smiled apologetically.

"I know the feeling," he laughed a little and gestured towards the stairs leading down "Shall we go?"

A dungeon had been redecorated especially for the Christmas party – no doubt Professor Slughorn knew someone who did this sort of thing professionally. Everything was done up in red and green, with swathes of golden material hiding the stone walls of the dungeons. A group of musicians were playing quiet background music. It was all incredibly tasteful, and Lily couldn't see any tinsel anywhere, not even on one of the Christmas trees dotted around.

"I'm sure this dungeon isn't usually this big," Will said, looking around with interest "I haven't been down here since fifth year though – bit of a disaster with Potions."

"Ah! Lily, my dear girl, good to see you – come over here, let me introduce you!" Professor Slughorn called from the corner where he was holding court, surrounded by a small group of mostly ex pupils and a few current students. Lily caught Will's hand and they made their way over, joining a very relieved looking Remus.

"Lily, I'd like you to meet Barnabas Cuffe, just started working at the Daily Prophet. Barnabas, Lily Evans, one of the most talented potion makers I've ever taught! She'll be teaching me a thing or two in a few years I expect, exceptional!" Lily shook hands with Barnabas Cuffe awkwardly, and that was the start of what felt like an excruciatingly long round of not particularly fascinating conversation and introductions. Things did not improve when Slughorn spotted Severus arriving and waved him over as well, and then started telling everyone how "these two could take over the potion making world, if only they'd work together!", but Lily couldn't find a polite way to extricate herself from the situation.

"I'll go get us some drinks – alcoholic or not?" Will whispered to her while Slughorn was busy fawning over Remus – "amazing potential, this one, could do anything he puts his mind to, quite wonderful".

"It'll be a miracle if we get through this sober – wine please," she whispered back, and then Slughorn was talking to her again (or more accurately, at her) about the achievements of someone whose name had escaped her.

In the time it took for Will got through the crowd to where they were serving drinks and back again, Slughorn had started dragging them all into photos – possibly millions of them, if he had his way. The photographer shuffled them around every few photos, and by the time they were done Lily's face ached from smiling.

"I think I need a copy of that one of you and Snape framed," Remus snorted "It was stunning."

Lily swore at him in response – Slughorn insisting that he needed one of his two potion masters in the making together had probably broken the world record for most uncomfortable photo ever ("Just put your arm around her, yes, perfect!"). She accepted the wine from Will with relief, downing half the glass at once.

"Sorry," Lily said once they were a safe distance away from Professor Slughorn "I probably should have warned you, it should be better now he's gotten all the introducing and showing off out of his system a bit though – should we go and see what the food is, he always serves the weirdest things."

"No, no, it's fine. I feel like a bit of an idiot now though after just getting an Acceptable at O.W.L. when it turns out I'm here with some kind of Potions genius," Will grinned at her.

"I'm hardly a genius," she deflected "Anyway, nothing wrong with an Acceptable. And you're way better than me at other stuff."

"Is that actually a dragon steak?" They had reached the food table, which was loaded with strange and expensive looking dishes (and the odd platter of sausage rolls, in case anyone actually wanted to eat something. Anyone with any sense went to dinner before Slughorn's parties, since the food was… memorable).

"I think so," Lily willed away the last of her blush "I'm more concerned about the thing with the fancy Latin name next to it."

"Yeah put it in 'fancy Latin' all you want, it still says dragon balls," Will said, sounding slightly horrified and amused at the same time. Lily nearly choked on a mouthful of wine.

"You know Latin?" she asked once she was done coughing (and if his hand remained resting on her back where he'd been patting it, well, she wasn't complaining).

"Yeah, my parents are a bit odd, they insisted I'd learn. Bit sad, right?"

"I think it's cool, I always wanted to learn another language."

"Makes a lot of spells dead easy to remember I guess, plenty of Latin roots."

"Ah, so this is your secret to doing so well in everything," Lily risked something that was hopefully just an innocent slice of quiche.

"Pretty much – that would explain the problem with Potions, anyway," Will laughed.

The evening improved considerably from there. They carefully avoided Professor Slughorn (and Severus), and even managed to have some more interesting conversations with past Slug Club members without Slughorn doing most of the talking for them.

"Do you know what your plans are after Hogwarts?" Will asked after the third story about how Slughorn had got someone a job at the Ministry.

"Not a clue, to be honest," Lily said. The future was a distant, mildly terrifying shape on the horizon that she was trying her best to ignore most of the time.

"Same, although you're the first person I've heard admit it."

"Really?" Lily looked up at him in surprise.

"Oh yeah. Everyone in my dorm seems to be completely focused on some perfect life plan, it's kind of scary."

"Wow. Must be nice to be them."

"You wouldn't say that if you could see them, you'd think N.E.W.T.s were next week the way they're acting. Sometimes you just need a break," he paused for a moment before continuing "I'm glad you asked me to come."

"I'm glad you came," Lily smiled at him.

"Any of the food edible?" Remus appeared next to them, seemingly from nowhere.

"Don't get too excited, they haven't brought the dessert stuff out yet," she said.

"Seriously, we've been here for ages already," Remus sighed.

At that moment the band launched into something louder and faster than before, and Professor Slughorn could be heard encouraging people to dance. They edged away, careful not to attract his attention over the crowded room.

"Lily, Remus, won't you young ones get out on the dancefloor?" Slughorn somehow managed to make his way through the crowds to near where they were standing.

"Ah, sorry Professor, I was just heading out for a bathroom break," Lily excused herself, dragging Will along behind her (much to the bemusement of Professor Slughorn) as Remus was persuaded into dancing with a sixth year girl who looked worryingly keen on the whole thing.

The corridor was cool and quiet after the warm stuffy atmosphere inside the dungeon. They moved away from the door a little, and Lily settled down against the wall, patting the floor next to her until Will got the hint and sat.

"So," she smiled "Tell me more about your complete lack of future plans."

* * *

"- okay but no, they really are the best band! Muggle music is great, you should try it." Lily was waving her hands animatedly as she talked. They'd stayed outside in the corridor until a flustered looking Remus escaped and dragged them back in (the desserts had finally appeared), and now it was gone midnight as they climbed the stairs of Gryffindor Tower.

"I'll look them up when I'm home maybe."

They fell quiet as they approached the entrance to Lily's common room and stood awkwardly in front of the Fat Lady's portrait.

"So…" Lily began, but the rest of her sentence was derailed when she glanced up and had to do a double take. Marlene would pay.

"… Mistletoe," Will said, following her gaze. There was a pause.

"Well, I guess that's a hint then."

"In that case, maybe you I should take it."

* * *

 **Saturday 17** **th** **December 1977**

"So," Marlene said meaningfully that morning as Lily was searching for her tights.

"So?"

"So, how was last night, of course?" Marlene waggled her eyebrows "Did that mysteriously appearing mistletoe outside see any action?"

"It was very nice. I had fun," Lily pulled her Christmas tights out of the top drawer "Aha!"

"And did the mistletoe have fun?"

"Why don't you ask the mistletoe?" Lily stuck her tongue out.

"Stop holding out on us," Eliza called from the depths of her wardrobe.

"Fine, we kissed, are you happy now?"

"Not particularly, details, details!" Jenny demanded.

"It was nice," Lily shrugged. The others exchanged looks of disbelief.

"Kisses are not 'nice'. Not with anyone as ridiculously hot as that, anyway," Marlene informed her.

Lily sighed. She was perfectly aware of this. And the kiss _had_ been nice. Will was clearly very talented at the whole kissing thing, and very attractive, and funny, smart… she'd been over this list to herself many, many times before. He was the sort of person you kind of couldn't help developing a bit of a crush on (or at least, she couldn't). But it hadn't been mind-blowing – no sparks, no fireworks. Honestly, not even much in the way of butterflies. Lily had kissed people before; she knew how this was supposed to go.

"Maybe you just need to try it a few more times," Jenny suggested, pulling Lily out of her thoughts.

"Maybe," she agreed.

" _Maybe_ ," Marlene said "You really want to be kissing someone else." Lily stared at her in confusion.

"I keep thinking that one day I might understand what goes through your head, and then you come out with things like this and I'm lost again."

"Oh whatever, let's go get breakfast, I'm starving."

They were later down to breakfast than usual, and the Great Hall was full of people who had taken advantage of their first lie in of the holidays. They joined James, Sirius, Remus and Peter at the Gryffindor table, Jenny and Eliza briefly squabbling over the nearest toast rack as they got their food.

"How did the end of your date go?" Remus asked (he'd allowed Professor Slughorn to drag him into a conversation about the endless possibilities available to him so that Lily and Will could leave alone). James' sausage missed his mouth and fell back to his plate.

"Pretty good, how's your future career in the Ministry looking?" Lily grinned.

"It'd better have been, you owe me so many favours right now," he groaned.

"What are we all planning to do with our first day of freedom?" Sirius interrupted loudly.

"Homework," Lily and Remus chorused. Sirius looked at them in disgust.

"What is wrong with you people?"

"If we do as much as we can now, we get to enjoy Christmas without it all hanging over us, and then we've only got a bit to do before we go back," Lily said.

"I think I'll stick to leaving it until the last possible second if it's all the same to you," Sirius shook his head at them.

"Suit yourself." Remus shrugged.

There was quiet for about five seconds after Remus and Lily left for the library before James spoke.

"So last night actually went well?"

Marlene debated asking him exactly what he meant, but he looked helpless enough that she gave in.

"Not badly," she said carefully.

"'Well' and 'not bad' are two different things," Sirius pointed out.

"I'm not saying anything else," Marlene helped herself to more bacon, leaving James to his internal crisis. Obviously he wanted Lily to be happy, and as much as he was inclined to say otherwise right now, from what he knew of him Will was a pretty decent guy. Probably better for her than James was anyway… They wouldn't fight or annoy each other, and he still wasn't even sure why Dumbledore had chosen _him_ as Head Boy – everyone had expected the position to go to Will, he was the natural choice.

On the other (slightly less logical) hand, he'd rather Lily's happiness involved him.

* * *

"Right, if we tackle the biggest things this weekend and then it's done?" Remus asked as they settled down at their usual table, spreading out textbooks and notes.

"Sure – Charms, Herbology, Defence, Arithmancy, maybe Potions? I'm guessing you didn't get much Transfiguration," Lily pinned a roll of parchment open with her ink bottle.

"Outstanding, so not a bit, you?"

"Damn you. Exceeds expectations, so just an essay, could be much worse I suppose. Shall we start with Arithmancy, it looks straightforward at least?"

They worked through the morning, more relaxed than usual without the threat of nearby deadlines – it was hard to stay too serious when Christmas was just around the corner.

"So did you solve your James problem in the end?" Remus asked during their coffee break.

"What?"

"Secret Santa?"

"Oh, that. Yeah, Christmas shopping in Hogsmeade is great. You got all your stuff sorted?" Lily stood to return an Arithmancy book to the shelf.

"Yeah, only took me about half an hour."

"Seriously?! What did you do for the rest of the day?" Lily looked surprised. Remus went red.

"I read for a bit," he said (and it was partially true).

"You're blushing, so unless you were reading some really explicit erotica right there on the main street I'm not buying that." Lily folded her arms.

"I might have been, you don't know!"

"Been borrowing Jenny's books again have you?"

"Shut up."

"Not until you spill, come on, I want answers!"

There was a brief staring match, Lily calmly watching an increasingly awkward Remus.

"Isortofkindofwentonadate-wellnotadate-withSirius," Remus rushed out at once and then hid his face in his arms.

"I'm sorry, you what?" Lily smirked and poked at his elbow.

"You heard me!"

"Not really, but I go the idea. So does this mean you two are – well, you know?" she asked.

"I think I'd better tell you from the beginning," Remus sighed.

"From the- how long have you been keeping this a secret?!" Lily stared at him in shock.

Remus explained the whole thing – the kiss outside the library, the week before Remus panicked (he carefully edited out any reference to their full moon activities and passed it off as worry about their friendship), the ensuing fight – "And you let me believe that was all about Sirius liking someone else!" Lily exclaimed.

"And then you and James locked us in a classroom," Remus continued, glaring "And we… well, we sorted some things out, and decided to be friends."

"Friends that date."

Remus, who had remained pink in the face throughout, went a darker shade of red again.

"He found me reading in Hogsmeade and… well, he persuaded me to go to Madam Puddifoot's with him."

"Oh. My. God." Lily thought she might have cracked a rib in the effort not to laugh. Remus scowled at her.

"It wasn't a date! They do really nice hot chocolate!" Lily raised her eyebrows at him "Okay… Well, you really can't not go on a date in there can you? So we not-went on a date."

"You two are adorable."

"Shut up!"

"So what happens now?" Lily asked a few minutes later, when she was done laughing at him.

"I… I don't know, actually."

"Have you talked to him about it?"

"Not really… We said we should do it again, afterwards I mean," Remus admitted.

"You could ask him out," Lily suggested. Remus looked terrified at the thought. "… Or you could continue repressing your feelings and pretend that you're super platonic friends for the rest of your lives even though you both know its bullshit." She rolled her eyes.

"I'm going to fuck this up again," Remus said quietly.

"Oh Remus," Lily sighed and moved to hug him.

"Let's talk about your date then," Remus changed the subject, and Lily let it drop.

"There's really not much to say."

"It looked like things were going well at the party, anyway."

"They were. I had fun." Lily sat back down and pulled her Defence Against the Dark Arts essay towards her.

"And?"

"And what?"

"… That bad, huh?"

"What?!"

* * *

 **Saturday 24** **th** **December 1977**

Even though nearly half of the school had gone home for the Christmas holidays, the Gryffindor common room was louder than ever in the week leading up to Christmas Day. Everyone (even the N.E.W.T. and O.W.L. students) seemed to have abandoned their schoolwork in favour of games of Exploding Snap, Wizard's Chess, and even an ill-advised game of indoor Quidditch between a few of the fourth years that James had to unwillingly put an end to on Wednesday evening. Almost every day people could be seen braving the freezing cold to build snowmen and have snowball fights in the grounds, but today a sudden snowstorm had forced everyone back inside and the common room was packed.

"Do you think we should stop them?" Lily asked, looking up from her book at the fourth years on the other side of the room, where they were bent over a large box, whispering with their heads together.

"Stop what?" James' attention remained on his game of chess with Remus "Come on, it's only a pawn you coward!"

A loud bang made everyone jump as a shower of multi-coloured sparks raining from the ceiling.

"Stop that," Lily said as another of Dr Filibuster's Fabulous Wet-Start, No-Heat Fireworks went off.

"Leave it, they're not hurting anyway," James advised, cursing as Remus' bishop started dragging his knight off its horse.

"Well, it is Christmas," Lily shrugged and went back to reading "If Professor McGonagall or someone comes up, we didn't see anything."

"The Head Boy, Head Girl and seventh year prefect all failed to notice the fireworks going off in an enclosed space?" Remus snorted.

"Yes, we were temporarily blinded by tinsel," James said seriously, and Lily half-heartedly swatted at him with her book.

"Tinsel is wonderful, screw you."

"It is; I only wish I could see the Christmas tree under it."

"Checkmate," Remus interrupted cheerfully.

"Unfair, I was distracted!" James protested.

"Don't get distracted then. You always lose anyway."

"Whatever, that didn't count," James stuck his tongue out "Shall we go down to dinner?"

"Depends, does anyone want to wake Sirius up?" Remus asked. They all turned to contemplate Sirius, napping on the sofa after an energetic afternoon bewitching suits of armour and running away from Filch and Mrs Norris.

"How the hell did he sleep through those fireworks?" Lily asked in amazement.

"Sirius sleeping is one of the wonders of the world," James said and threw a chess piece at him "OI, Padfoot!"

* * *

Excitement hung in the air in the Great Hall that night – everyone was looking forwards to Christmas Day.

"Tonight's the night everyone!" Sirius said gleefully, now considerably more awake.

"The night for what?" Peter asked.

"The night! Everyone's Secret Santa presents have to be under the tree before we all wake up tomorrow morning and see what exciting things Santa brought us!"

"What if we run into someone else at the same time?" Jenny said.

"Don't do it and you won't have to find out. Get into the spirit of things Jenny dearest! Don't forget to keep your wrapping paper hidden and disguise your handwriting people."

"I thought you were kidding about that!"

"I never kid about Secret Santa. The consequences will be horrible, trust me."

"Mince pies!" James said excitedly as the desserts appeared. Lily pulled a face and served herself a bowl of treacle sponge and custard instead. "Seriously? You're basically Miss Christmas but you don't eat _mince pies_?"

"Or Christmas pudding. Sorry to burst your bubble," Lily stuck her tongue out at him as James mock gasped and clutched his heart in a shock.

"My whole life is a lie!"

"You're such an idiot," Lily shook her head, smiling "I'm going to go do my wrapping, stay out of our dorm until I'm done so we don't find out what these consequences are."

"When did she stop sounding like she wants to strangle you whenever she says that?" Sirius asked, swallowing the last of his third mince pie.

"I'm not sure, but it's kind of wonderful." James was watching Lily walk away.

"You are kind of ridiculous," Marlene informed him.

* * *

Lily pulled her rolls of wrapping paper from underneath the bed (two completely different patterns, so people couldn't figure anything out – yes, she was taking this seriously) along with a few rolls of curling ribbon, scissors and Spellotape. She tapped the radio with her wand and fiddled until she found a station playing Christmas songs and settled down on the floor with her Secret Santa gifts.

She pushed the two neatly wrapped packages back under the bed along with all the spare wrapping paper, ready to get them downstairs later and under the tree without anyone seeing (which was starting to sound more and more like some kind of spy mission), and headed down to the common room where the others had broken out the board games again. Remus seemed to have embarked on a misguided attempt to teach them how to play Monopoly, which was causing a lot of confusion among the people who hadn't taken Muggle Studies.

"Why's this 'electric company' thing important?" James asked, frowning at the board.

"It's a bit early on in Christmas to be destroying friendships isn't it?" Lily took a seat on the sofa.

"Oh. I'm in jail again," Peter said sadly.

"Board games are a Christmas tradition Lily," Remus grinned. He appeared to be winning by a wide margin.

"Yeah but where's the Gobstones or Quidditch games? Why do you even have Muggle board games Moony?" James complained.

"We did a lesson on them in Muggle Studies so I bought a few," Remus shrugged "They're quite good really."

"Nothing flies or explodes or does, well, anything!"

"Use your imagination, you're just annoyed because you're losing."

James landed on another of Remus' properties and threw the last of his money down.

"Anyone want to play a proper game?" he asked hopefully "I've got model Quidditch upstairs."

"Of course you do," Lily muttered.

"Just for that Evans, you're playing with me." James jumped to his feet and ran off to fetch the game. Lily groaned.

Half an hour later Lily was egging on her team furiously as her keeper failed to save yet again. James was laughing at her while she shouted swearwords at the chasers.

"Aaaaaand… The snitch is mine!" he crowed as the miniature seeker's hand closed around a tiny golden snitch.

"Whatever, none of my pieces would listen to me!"

"Another game?" James asked sweetly.

"I'm good thanks. Shouldn't we be getting to bed so that presents will come?" Lily said, getting to her feet.

"Can I just say Moony wins?" Peter asked, yawning. He was the only other person still playing Monopoly, having ended up in jail so often that he hadn't managed to lose all his money yet.

"Fine by me," Remus grinned and started packing the board away. They said their goodnights and headed up to their respective dormitories.

* * *

 **A/N** **:** Many thanks to everyone who's been reading/favouriting/following and especially reviewing! I'm estimating the fic will be completed around the end of August, as long as everything runs on schedule :)


	9. December 1977 (III)

**Sunday 25** **th** **December 1977**

Lily woke up a little after four on Christmas morning, simultaneously cursing the existence of times before eight and bouncing with excitement. Everyone else in the room was still asleep, and she tiptoed across the room to get her Christmas jumper and pull it on over her pyjamas, then crept down the spiral staircase to the common room carrying her Secret Santa gifts.

The embers of the fire had died down, leaving only a slight glow in the fireplace. The sun was nowhere to be seen, and most of the candles had gone out during the night. Snow fell gently past the windows to settle on the lawns far below, and a bright moon lit the grounds. Blankets of snow gave way to the icy lake and white frosted Forbidden Forest, and Hagrid's hut looked like a gingerbread house in the distance. Between the windows stood the enormous Christmas tree that they had put up and decorated at the start of the month, but now piles of presents in bright festive paper sat underneath it, flooding that corner of the room since so many students had stayed behind for the holidays. Lily stood and took it all in for a moment before making her way over to the tree and tucking her parcels in amongst the rest.

She settled into her favourite armchair, near one of the few still burning candles, and pulled out her book to wait for everyone else to wake up. Everything was so silent that it was almost as if she was the only person left in the entire castle.

The next thing she knew, someone was shouting 'MERRY CHRISTMAS' at the top of their lungs. She retrieved her book from where it had slipped onto the floor and rubbed at her eyes, yawning. Sirius came barrelling down the stairs, followed at a more sedate pace by James, Peter and a rather pale and tired looking Remus, all also still in their pyjamas.

"LILY!"

"Sirius!" Lily got to her feet, stretching "What time is it?"

"No idea," he said happily "Go wake the others up?"

"Half seven," Remus said "But I'll be amazed if anyone is still asleep after that."

The soundproofing in Hogwarts was better than Remus gave it credit for though, and Marlene, Jenny and Elizabeth were all still fast asleep. Lily debating being nice for about half a second, and then dismissed the idea.

"IT'S CHRISTMAS," she shouted loudly, causing Eliza to jerk awake and look around wildly. The others opened their eyes somewhat unwillingly, muttering incoherently and trying to burrow deeper into the pillows.

Eventually Lily got them all out of bed and downstairs, Jenny with the whole duvet wrapped around her shoulders. They took advantage of the otherwise empty common room to spread out over the best seats, next to the first that had been relit while Lily slept. It was snowing more heavily now, so that all that could be seen out of the windows was white, but everyone's attention was fixed on what was under the tree.

Other students were starting to emerge from their dorms as they fished out presents with their names on from the pile, calling out names every few seconds as they found another one. They retreated back to their seats around the fire to open everything. The air was soon filled with exclamations of excitement from them and the other people who had started opening their own gifts. Everything quickly descended into chaos as people ripped off paper, and it was impossible to keep track of who had received what.

Lily pulled the ribbon and paper off of a bundle of Muggle sweets and chocolate that her parents had sent her, watching Eliza (who was sat next to her) opening her gifts out of the corner of her eye, trying not to look too interested as Eliza unwrapped the scarf, hat and gloves that she had given her for Secret Santa.

"Whoever my Santas are, I love you," Remus proclaimed, already starting on a truly enormous slab of Honeydukes best chocolate and waving a book in the air to illustrate his point.

"Ditto!" Sirius called as he opened a broom care kit, having already received a bag of assorted Zonko's products.

Peter looked like he might cry with happiness when he opened a box of drawing pencils and charcoal, grinning happily and squeaking his thanks. Sitting next to him, James was flipping through a very technical looking book on Quidditch tactics – 'full colour, multiple perspective diagrams of every move!' – probably already re-planning the entire of next term's training.

Lily picked up the lumpier of her two Secret Santa gifts and poked at it, trying unsuccessfully to identify it before she shredded the paper to find a set of good quills in bright and glittering colours, with bottles of unusual ink (everything from the common colour changing variety to one that could read itself out when you wrote with it to an automatic translating ink with over twenty languages). She shouted her thanks to the group in general before starting on the second package. She had to peel off several bits of Spellotape before she could make any headway with the silver paper which fell open to reveal a bundle of tinsel. Lily laughed and unwound it, finding a book underneath entitled 'The Potion Masters Record Book'. She'd been admiring one just like it in Flourish and Blotts before the start of term and she immediately began flipping through it – there was advice on potion editing and creation along with all the pages and pages for notes.

"What's that you've got Lily?" Marlene leaned over to look at it.

"It's a potions diary, pretty much. For recording experiments and brews and stuff," Lily hugged it to her chest, smiling "It's perfect!"

Jenny was reading the back of some winter romance paperback, absently sucking on the end of a sugar quill from the Honeydukes box sitting next to her. Marlene had put her new model Quidditch team up safely on a side table and moved over to James to compare Quidditch books (hers had the rather less serious title of 'One Thousand and One Dumb Ways to Play Quidditch').

"Are you lot seriously not done yet?" Sirius asked incredulously, seeing that James, Peter and Eliza all still had unopened presents in front of them.

"It's not like we're in any rush," James pointed out.

"On the contrary Prongs – if we have breakfast too late then we won't be able to eat all of the fantastic Christmas breakfast _and_ lunch, and that would be a tragedy."

James rolled his eyes, and picked up his last present, poking and shaking it as he tried to figure out what it was, eventually giving up and ripping off the paper to find… another layer of paper. And another, and lots of balled up paper to disguise the shape, until he got down to the last layer covering what was now clearly another book. He peeled off the final sheet of paper and found a folded piece of paper on top, which revealed itself to be a poster for the upcoming World Cup next summer which would update itself throughout the season (currently two of the sixteen teams were left to be announced) and he carefully refolded it before turning to the book.

"Definitely a theme with presents this year," Jenny commented "Is that actually a book on the World Cup that hasn't even happened yet?" James looked affronted.

"This isn't just a book on the four hundred and eighteenth World Cup Jenny – it's got the entire two year build up, information on all the teams who participate in the group rounds and whole chapters for all sixteen qualifying teams once they're announced, all the information on the players and potential tactics…" Jenny yawned widely "You just don't appreciate Quidditch properly," James muttered, turning back to his book.

"Is that a chocolate mouse?" Eliza asked Peter?

"It's a rat," he said, pointedly ignoring Sirius, who was shaking with laughter, and examining the rest of the contents of the gift bag which included fudge, chocolate frogs and a box of mince pies.

Finally Eliza opened the final present (in their corner of the room, at any rate – many Gryffindors had only just woken up, or were still sleeping, and the pile under the tree was still impressively large), and thanked her mystery gift giver for the Christmas jumper which she put on immediately.

Eventually, with a lot of groaning and complaining about the distance from Gryffindor Tower to the Great Hall, everyone got to their feet, putting their new presents away in their dorms and then regrouping, all still dressed in their pyjamas. Lily had put on her favourite Christmas socks and draped the tinsel around Marlene's neck, but mostly they all looked as though they'd just gotten out of bed (although Jenny had finally released her duvet). They threw most of the wrapping paper that had been strewn all over the floor into the fire and then headed down to breakfast.

The food at Hogwarts was always wonderful, and especially so for feasts and special occasions, but they really pulled out all of the stops of Christmas Day. Breakfast included, perhaps slightly unusually, mince pies and shortbread shaped like reindeer that actually walked and flew a few inches above the plates.

Sirius immediately began heaping food onto his plate indiscriminately, accidentally dumping a spoonful of scrambled eggs on top of a mince pie that was already precariously close to a small lake of baked beans. Lily shook her head, and reached for the pancakes.

"Anyone guessed their Santas yet?" Sirius asked around a mouthful of food.

"Pretty sure mine were Lily for the jumper and probably Jenny for the hat and stuff," Eliza said, catching a reindeer biscuit.

"I was the hat actually," said Lily.

"Yeah, you got us the wrong way around," Jenny added "How did you guess though?"

Eliza just smiled and shrugged.

The ceiling of the Great Hall showed a white sky, promising more snow later on, but the blizzard had passed, so as soon as they were all finished with breakfast they bundled up in the warmest clothes they owned and went out onto the lawns in front of the castle. Many of the other students clearly had the same idea, and the grounds were filled with shapes made mostly unrecognisable by all the layers of wool.

Lily and Elizabeth set about making a snowman – without any magic, as Lily kept insisting that magic was cheating, which meant that theirs quickly began looking more like it belonged to some of the first years.

"That's a very nice looking, er, lump of snow you've got there," James commented, building what seemed to be a Quidditch player complete with broomstick with Sirius a few yards away.

"Whatever, it isn't finished yet, you'll see!" Lily stuck her tongue out and continued shaping the head.

"Where have the others gone anyway?" Elizabeth asked a little later, when it became clear that their snowman wasn't likely to start looking any less like a big pile of snow anytime soon.

"Not sure actually," James frowned, looking around. Before they could say anything else though, several snowballs launched themselves through the air with varying accuracy, one hitting James' arm. Sirius dived behind his snowman, cursing, and immediately grabbed a handful of snow and started looking for the source.

Remus and Peter were scrambling out of a nearby tree, while on the other side Marlene and Jenny were preparing to hurl more snowballs.

"THIS IS WAR!" Sirius yelled, diving towards them, snow in hand.

Several sixth and seventh years joined the fight, and within minutes wands were out and Shield Charms in common use as snowballs sped by. Someone had enchanted a handful of snowballs to follow Peter around, and while Sirius was busy laughing hysterically at the sight of Peter running as fast as he could with the snowballs chasing after him Lily and Marlene struck up a temporary truce and snuck up behind him to shove handfuls of snow over his head and down the back of his neck. His laughter quickly turned to shrieks and promises of revenge, and they scattered again to find new targets. Remus had surprisingly good aim, and was throwing snowballs from a relatively safe distance at anyone who came into his line of sight, and a bunch of Ravenclaws were overheard debating making a catapult.

After a few hours though snow began to fall again, and most people began to head back to the warmth of the Entrance Hall. Their woollen winter cloaks and jumpers were all soaked through, and they hurried back to their common rooms to avoid Filch catching them dripping all over the floors and losing his very limited patience (he'd nearly made a group of second years cry a few days ago when they accidentally tracked muddy footprints inside).

"Shit, we were outside longer than I thought," Lily swore as she checked the clock, drying herself off by directing a stream of hot air from her wand.

"Twenty minutes to get dry and down the lunch." Marlene peeled off her wet outer layers as they raced up the stairs to their dormitory.

Miraculously they arrived in the Great Hall just in time, sliding into the remaining spaces at one end of the Gryffindor table. The snow storm outside had increased, blocking out the weak sunlight and leaving the hall mostly lit by the candles and live fairies. The room was full of chatter and laughter, and everybody that Lily could see looked happy. Every member of staff was present at the top table for once.

Everyone fell silent as Professor Dumbledore stood, wearing very festive robes with reindeer all over them.

"The kitchens have outdone themselves this year, so I won't keep you from your feast a moment longer. All I have to say is Merry Christmas, one and all!" Dumbledore clapped his hands as he had at the welcome feast, and the previously empty plates filled. Stacks of wizarding crackers sat every few feet along the table, and whole roast turkeys sat at regular intervals carving themselves upon request and surrounded by heaps of roast potatoes, stuffing balls and little sausages wrapped in bacon. There were whole trays of roasted and boiled vegetables, pots of cranberry sauce and several dishes that didn't look like any Christmas food that Lily had ever seen but presumably came from other countries. Loud bangs sounded all along the tables as they filled their plates, obscuring everything in clouds of blue smoke.

"Pull one with me?" She turned to find James waving a Christmas cracker at her. A bunch of flowers and a large floppy hat fell out when they pulled it, along with a noise like a cannon. He put on the hat and offered her the bouquet, grinning.

"Merry Christmas Lily," he said as she took them and stuffed them into an empty goblet. Several live mice scurried down the middle of the table, presumably from someone else's cracker, and Jenny (wearing a bright orange and green bobble hat) dropped a straw boater onto Lily's head. They laughed and ate and swapped hats until all of the platters were cleared and Professor Dumbledore stood again, dimming the candles. At least fifty flaming Christmas puddings appeared at the tables, accompanied by bowls of brandy butter, jugs of cream and custard, twelve flavours of ice cream, gravity defying towers of profiteroles and the unavoidable mountains of mince pies.

By the time dessert had vanished most of the students were leaning against one another on the benches, groaning.

"I've never eaten so much in my life," Jenny said, rubbing her stomach.

"The third helping of pudding was a mistake," Remus was lying stretched out on the bench, top hat nearly falling off and looking even more ill than he had that morning. No one was particularly willing to move, and it was over half an hour before the first new students started trickling out.

"We'd better get going if we want to get ready for the ball," Eliza sighed, getting to her feet. James stared at her in horror.

"The ball's nearly five hours away, what can you possibly need that much time for?" he asked.

"Every person in Hogwarts is going to want to have an incredibly long shower this afternoon; I'm getting in while I can."

They made their way out of the hall slowly, carrying the contents of their Christmas crackers and finalising the plans for that afternoon. As they passed the Slytherin table, nearly out of the doors into the Entrance Hall, someone stood suddenly.

"Merry Christmas," Severus said awkwardly, staring at Lily. Fortunately neither James nor Sirius heard, as they were walking ahead of her and arguing about whether Christmas pudding or mince pies were better. Lily frowned at Snape for a moment, but then relented.

"Merry Christmas," she said shortly, and followed the others out.

* * *

Unfortunately, it seemed that most of the students in Hogwarts had had the same idea as Eliza; there were queues outside every shower as Lily walked down the corridors, heading for the fifth floor. But being a Prefect had its perks, and there was no queue by the statue of Boris the Bewildered. The door was locked though, so she settled against the wall to wait.

Ten minutes later a fifth year Prefect emerged, looking a little embarrassed to find the Head Girl waiting with her fluffy towel and clean pyjamas, and Lily turned to give the password. She rarely bothered to use the Prefect's bathroom, since there were plenty of other showers closer to Gryffindor Tower, so she spent some time turning taps on and off to find the best bubble mixtures until the enormous bathtub was full and then just floated in the water for a while. The only sound came from the gently echoing splashed as Lily moved around. Eventually though she had to rinse out her hair under one of the water taps and leave, glad to find that no one was waiting outside the door.

Lily made her way back up to Gryffindor Tower in her pyjamas, towel wrapped around her hair, and found that she'd spent long enough soaking in the foamy water that only Marlene was off waiting for a shower somewhere still. Eliza was carefully combing and drying her hair in front of the mirror, forcing it to fall straight for once.

"This is such a pain," she complained, trying to get the back of her hair properly. Lily took pity on her and pulled her own wand out, taking the brush from Eliza and directing hot air.

"How long have we got?" Jenny asked, searching under her bed for something.

"Hours still, relax," Eliza said, flopping back onto her bed with her now dry hair and pulling a bottle of nail polish from her bedside table. Lily took her place in front of the mirror, swearing occasionally as she tried to work the knots out of her own hair.

Lily had been back for nearly an hour by the time Marlene returned, grumpy after her long wait for the shower.

"I told you, you should have come down earlier with us," Jenny said.

"Oh piss off, I'm done now," Marlene sat on the edge of the bed in her underwear to towel off her short hair.

"Ladies, anyone have some spare Sleekeazy's?" Sirius appeared in the doorway, causing Eliza to jump and drip nail polish over her bedsheets.

"How the fuck did you get up here?" Jenny demanded, pulling her dressing gown closed more tightly. Marlene seemed unconcerned, and threw a bottle at Sirius' head. He ducked and caught it, shouting his thanks as he ran back down the stairs.

It seemed to Lily that they suddenly went from having hours to get ready to nearly no time at all. There was a lot of last minute panicking and missing shoes and makeup problems, and a frantic search for the spell that would fix a smudged nail, but finally all four of them were dressed and ready to go.

The Entrance Hall was already crowded with people as they descended the main staircase. There were brightly coloured dress robes, people posing together for photos, and lots of loud and excited chatter. The doors were still shut, as it was five minutes before the scheduled start time, and they stopped just before the bottom of the stairs while they could still look over everyone's heads.

"I've spotted Patrick, I'm just going to say hi!" Marlene quickly disappeared into the crowd, and Lily kept looking around until-

"Look, there's the guys," Eliza pointed over to where James, Sirius and Peter were standing. They made their way over, trying not to step on anyone's feet.

"- still can't believe this, he shouldn't be on his own on Christmas," Sirius hissed under his breath.

"I know, he insisted though, we'll join him after, it'll be barely later than usual," James replied quietly "He wants us to have fun." They all jumped a little as the three girls approached.

"Well don't you all look stunning," Sirius said loudly to cover the moment of weirdness.

"Beautiful," James said sincerely, and Lily had a moment of confused panic because he was looking at her why did he keep looking at her? She felt herself turn pink and looked away awkwardly.

"Not bad yourself," Eliza winked and turned to wave Marlene over.

"Where's Remus?" Lily asked, frowning and looking around.

"Ah, an owl came from his mother. He's gone back to visit her for a few days, had to rush off this afternoon," James said "Nothing to worry about."

They all still looked worried though, and Lily was particularly reassured. At that moment though the bells rang out the time, and the doors to the Great Hall swung open slowly. And she knew it was a terribly clichéd theme and they did basically the same thing for almost every single ball, but Lily couldn't help but be excited as she saw all the new decorations.

The twelve enormous Christmas trees still stood along the walls the same as they had done earlier in the day, but the fake snow now falling from the ceiling caught in the branches and dusted everything with white. The four house tables had vanished, replaced with a large icy looking dance floor in the centre of the room surrounded by smaller round tables. Long tables stood along the back wall, looking like they might split under the weight of the food (if it wasn't for magic, anyway). Piles of finger food sat on platters, everything from sausage rolls and pizza to salmon appetiser things to little cakes and tarts. The grand centrepiece of each table was an enormous and elaborately decorated Christmas cake. The teacher's dais now held a band rather than the usual table, and elegant ice sculptures were dotted around the room. Icicles hung wherever it was possible to fit them – over the fireplace (enchanted to burn with icy blue flames tonight), from the edges of tables, ever replacing the candles entirely with floating ice shapes that glowed gently.

Lily allowed herself to be swept along with the crowd into the hall, still staring around at everything. The band was playing quietly in the background, and several teachers (including all four heads of house) were stood around the room wearing dress robes and ready to prevent any inappropriate behaviour.

"Come on, let's grab a good table, quick," Jenny grabbed Lily and Eliza's hands on either side of her and pulled them straight across the middle of the dancefloor (which fortunately felt far more like wood than its icy appearance would suggest) to an empty table near its edge, not too far from the buffet tables. Sirius grabbed a chair from the next table over so that there was space for all seven of them, and they settled down to wait for things to get past the initial standing around awkwardly stage. Trays floated around the room with glasses full of pumpkin juice and other non-alcoholic drinks, and Professor McGonagall gave Sirius a very stern look as she walked past until he returned his hip flask to the pocket of his robes.

Professor Dumbledore stood at the front of the room after about five minutes, silencing the band and the students.

"Good evening everyone! Before we begin properly, I'd just like to thank our Head Boy, Mr James Potter, for organising this event tonight with the help of our Prefects," James looked like he would quite like to sink into his chair and disappear for once "And I hope everyone has a magical night!"

There was a polite round of applause, and a few moments later the band started up again, louder and a little faster. Professor Dumbledore immediately offered his arm to Professor Sprout and took to the dance floor, performing a surprisingly good waltz considering the height difference between the two. A few students, mostly couples, joined them, looking torn between staying at the edge noncommittally and moving to the centre of the dance floor – away from the mocking of their friends, but with everyone's attention on them.

"Who'll dance with me then?" Sirius asked as the floor began to fill more. Lily shook her head, preferring to watch for the start until she felt more like dancing.

"I'll do a few songs with you after I'm done with Patrick," Marlene offered.

"Poor Patrick," Sirius laughed.

"He promised one dance, and then he's done. I'll go find him now actually." And Marlene got up and left, waving back at them over her shoulder.

"Anyone else?" Peter asked hopefully. There was silence for a moment, and then Eliza sighed.

"I'll dance a few with you if you want Pete." Peter looked thrilled, and they soon vanished into the crowds.

"That girl is a saint," Sirius shook his head, watching them go.

"He's your friend!" Jenny pointed out.

"That doesn't stop him having two left feet," James said "I hope she doesn't like her toes the way they are…"

"Anyone fancy the buffet yet, while I'm waiting for Marley?" Sirius asked, glancing over at the food. Everyone else groaned.

"I'm still not recovered from lunch," Lily said, looking a little green at the thought of eating so soon.

They talked and watched a little longer, until a sixth year boy – Lily thought he might be a Slug Club member – came up and asked Jenny to dance, looking incredibly nervous. Lily gave her a thumbs up and mouthed 'he's cute' when Jenny looked back over her shoulder as she walked away, getting a slight nod in return.

Shortly after that Marlene returned – having managed to con two dances out of Patrick, who had clearly decided that dancing with his girlfriend was _slightly_ more bearable than dancing in general – and whisked Sirius off. Within seconds they were doing something far faster and more violent than really suited the music, clearing a noticeable gap around then as people avoided the sudden limb movements.

Lily turned back to face the table, and realised that she'd been left alone with James. She blushed again, for no apparent reason. It's just because he liked your present and he hasn't figured it out yet, she told herself, avoiding eye contact.

"Do you know who either of your Santas are yet?" James asked, seemingly reading her mind. Lily shook her head.

"Not really – probably one of the girls for the Potions diary, I think I might have mentioned it to them. It's fantastic," she said, smiling. James seemed a little redder than usual in the warmth from all the people in the hall. "How about you?"

"Well one book was almost certainly Remus – I'd bet he got Marlene's too, even when you think a book isn't what you want he's got a knack for finding one that's perfect. I'm not sure about the other one though… They're both so great, I half want to accuse Remus of cheating and helping someone else."

He certainly hadn't, Lily thought, although he was probably right about Remus getting him the other book. Another tray floated past and Lily snagged two drinks, sliding one glass across the table to James.

"Are you going to tell me who you gave to, or is Sirius still threatening people for their secrecy?" Lily asked.

"I'll tell you mine if you tell me yours."

"… Am I allowed to guess?"

"Maybe," James grinned, apparently confident that she couldn't.

"I think you had Marlene's other gift – the Quidditch models – and I'm not sure, maybe Sirius? I know Sirius and Jenny gave to Peter."

"Jenny, really?" James seemed surprised "I don't think I've ever seen him so happy about a present before." She noticed that he didn't respond to her guesses.

"She's good at remembering little things. And she said her other was Eliza, so that's her sorted."

They continued trying to piece together the puzzle that was Secret Santa. None of the others returned in the time they were talking – not hungry or tired enough yet – so their conversation remained uninterrupted, but Lily still couldn't figure out who gave her the book, which was the mystery she really wanted to solve (because clearly someone deserved a very nice thank you).

"You know what?" James said suddenly as Lily was musing on this out loud.

"What?"

"This is a ball, balls are for dancing aren't they?" Lily stared at him, uncomprehending.

"We should be dancing," he explained after a moment.

"Well, I would, but we're a little short on dance partners," Lily pointed out. It was James' turn to look at her as though she'd said something very confusing.

"You could dance with me?" James said, not meeting her eyes. He was definitely going a bit red now, she thought.

"… Sure," the response slipped out without much thought, and she couldn't quite believe she was doing this as they walked out onto the dance floor. Fortunately the band was playing something fast and energetic, so they didn't have to try and dance properly that much. It was almost the polar opposite of the last ball, Lily thought as she spun around. ('Dance with me Evans?' James had asked two years ago, and looking back how had she never realised he wasn't entirely joking. He'd been kind of an ass in fifth year though, so different to how he acted now – everything was changing this year though, flipped on its head.)

Their dancing had brought them closer to the opposite side of the room, and another spin gave her a brief glimpse of Severus, wearing slightly shabby dress robes and with long hair obscuring part of his face. She felt a surprisingly strong pang of regret as she watched one of his Slytherin friends lean over and make some comment to him. There was another thing that had changed since Christmas of fifth year… She'd thought the boy she'd grown up with had been better than all this Dark Arts stuff.

The song ended and Lily pushed her nostalgia away. This was a party – she should be in the present, having fun. And she _was_ having fun, even dancing with James (she didn't know she should laugh at him or not – she was pretty certain that his parents must have taken him to dance lessons at some point – but she did it anyway).

They danced a few more songs, until something slower began and Lily started to become aware of all the places her shoes pinched at her feet. She followed James back to their table, not occupied only by Peter (Eliza had been dancing with someone different every time she spotted her, and Marlene and Sirius were still going strong out in the middle of the dancefloor), and flopped into a seat, instantly going to take off her shoes.

"Why isn't there a spell for breaking in nice shoes," she muttered as she rubbed at her feet. Jenny dropped down into the seat next to her a second later, also quickly discarding her heels.

"Come get some food with me Lily?" she asked, standing up again not long after she'd sat down.

The buffet tables were fairly busy now, and they joined the queue at one end, grabbing paper plates and napkins.

"So how was your dance partner?" Lily asked, nudging Jenny.

"Not bad, eight out of ten for the dancing, seven for the kissing," Jenny said promptly, piling cocktail sausages and cubes of cheese onto her plate "His name is Dirk," she added.

"Can I steal your icing?" Lily looked hopefully at the slice of cake that Jenny was cutting.

"If you tell me about dancing with James – I did see that right, didn't I?" It was clear that this was Jenny's real intention in getting Lily away from the table. She considered this for a moment.

"Fair deal – I don't know, we wanted to dance, there wasn't anyone else around to dance with, so…"

"Did he ask, or you?"

"He did, why?"

"Just curious. Did you have fun?"

"Sure," Lily shrugged "Why wouldn't I?"

Jenny just rolled her eyes and muttered something about them being impossible. They made their way back to their table with fully loaded plates to find that everyone but Eliza had returned, also with food in mind. The others went up to get food as Lily and Jenny sat down to eat, Lily stealing the thick icing from Jenny's cake.

"I'd watch the punch if I were you," James said cheerfully as he sat down next to Lily "Sirius just poured a fair bit of vodka or something into most of the bowls I think, and the Refilling Charm we put on them should replicated the alcohol as well."

Lily, to Jenny's surprise, didn't reprimand James for failing to carry out his Head Boy duties and just laughed.

"Maybe we should wait a few hours, until the teachers aren't keeping such a close eye on everyone," Lily nodded towards where Professor McGonagall was standing near the refreshments, clearly keeping an eye out for anyone who might be less than sober.

"Are you condoning drinking alcohol at a school party?" James gasped in mock horror, teasing her.

"What, we're of age. I drink at Slughorn's stuff when we're allowed," Lily said defensively.

"Yes, but we're not allowed here," he pointed out. Lily looked like she was tempted to start an argument (it's not like she didn't drink and do other fun things, just because she liked to follow the rules most of the time!), but fortunately the situation was diffused by the return of Marlene, Sirius and Peter, the former pair still looking very warm from their exertions on the dance floor. Sirius shrugged off his outer dress robes as he sat down, leaving him in just a shirt, bow tie, trousers and bright red waistcoat. Lily excused herself, and ducked out of the doors for five minutes of fresh air before they inevitably returned to dancing.

"Getting a little peace?" She jumped as Will's voice came from behind her.

"I – hi, yeah, um…" She tried to find something to say, tongue tied.

"Don't worry," Will seemed amused "I kind of got the idea, since you haven't spoken to me since Slughorn's party."

"I – yeah, I'm sorry about that," Lily felt suddenly more guilty about it than she had all week, when it had seemed like the best plan to just avoid Will.

"It's cool, I know you and that James Potter have something going on," he spotted her expression and hurriedly continued "I just figured we're friends still, right?"

"Of course, definitely, just – hang on, can we go back a moment, what was that about me and- and James?" Lily said, confused. Will looked uncertain suddenly.

"Shit, sorry, is it a secret or something," he said apologetically "I've put my foot in it now haven't I?"

"No – I mean, I guess, but – look, what do you mean, me and James?"

It finally seemed to dawn on Will that she had absolutely no clue what he was on about – because he couldn't mean…

"Aren't you two – you aren't together then?"

"No?"

"Oh. Right. I thought, what with him having stopped asking you out all the time and you two hanging out now, I assumed you were getting somewhere now."

"I- no, we're just friends," Lily said. And with the castle at their backs, music and laughter leaking out into the night air, she realised that maybe – well, maybe that wasn't what she wanted after all.

"We should get back inside or you'll freeze to death in that dress," Will broke the silence, nodding towards her bare feet resting inches from the snow. He held out a hand and she let him pull her to her feet.

"So," she said as they walked back inside "Friends dance together, right?"

* * *

By the time Lily got back to their table, Sirius was off dancing with Jo Sayre from the Quidditch team and James and Peter were making a second trip to the buffet. Eliza and Marlene were sat at the table, heads close together as they gossiped about the evening so far.

"Apparently Joanna's boyfriend was jealous that she's so involved with Quidditch now," Eliza informed her as soon as she sat down next to them "They had a fight about three feet away from us, pretty quiet but nasty, I think Sirius is trying to cheer her up."

"Him and James claim that they had nothing to do with the fact that the guy has left already," Marlene said. James and Peter joined them, carrying more food than two people could possibly eat and carefully levitating glasses of the spiked punch.

"I swear we didn't have that much drama when we were what, fourteen?" Lily shook her head.

"Hmm. Anyway, was that Will I saw you dancing with?" Eliza asked.

"Yeah," Lily said "We're just friends," she clarified as Marlene winked at her. James didn't look up from his conversation with Peter.

Marlene and James were stolen away by some of the Quidditch team a little later, and Lily danced a few songs with Peter, then Eliza, and a surprisingly pleasant half an hour or so with Sirius after her third glass of punch (she swore they were getting stronger).

"I think I'll head off to bed soon," James said not long after midnight, when they were mostly all back at the table for more drinks and food.

"What?!" Jenny exclaimed "We've still got an hour left!"

"I promised I'd floo call my parents tomorrow morning though," James said apologetically.

"If you're off then I'll come," Sirius yawned unconvincingly – Lily was sure it was faked. Peter nodded along (he did look like he might fall asleep in his chair though).

"We'll see you lot at lunch tomorrow I expect?" James asked.

"Should do, if we're awake," Eliza didn't sound like she thought that was particularly likely.

"Where's Marlene gotten to?" Sirius looked around "We should probably let her know before we leave."

"I wouldn't worry, I saw her going out the doors with Patrick just now," Jenny snorted. James, Sirius and Peter said their goodbyes and left the hall, outer robes thrown over their shoulders and bowties undone.

"Shall we go up and dance again then?" Eliza stood, and Lily and Jenny followed her back out onto the dancefloor.

"I'm just going to the bathroom, I'll be back soon," Lily shouted over the music (which had gotten increasingly louder as the night went on). She ducked between the crowds of people and out of the doors into the quieter Entrance Hall and down the corridor, alone with her thoughts again. _'I assumed you were getting somewhere now.'_ , Will had said. 'Now', like her and James was some inevitable conclusion that they'd been failing to reach for the past six years. Well, maybe it hadn't been that far off. It seemed that they'd just managed to miss each other.

The further Lily walked the quieter it got, until she could hear another set of footsteps behind her. She glanced back over her shoulder, and then stopped dead.

"Lily…" he began.

"What do you want, Severus?" she sighed. She suddenly felt very tired.

"I, just – we were friends, once," Lily raised her eyebrows "I fucked up, I know what I did – I would never – I should never have," he said, and shut his eyes for a second. Despite herself, Lily felt a pang of sympathy – she'd heard this all before, apologies for something unforgivable, but… He had told her about magic, he had told her about Hogwarts. He'd held her hand when she was scared on the train that first year and they'd made their first potion together in Professor Slughorn's dungeon and all of that stuff didn't just _go away_ at the end of fifth year.

"I just had to try and fix things again," Severus pushed on.

"We've been over this before," she said quietly "Not while you're up to your neck in the Dark Arts, hanging out with those… those future Death Eaters every day."

"Because the company you keep these days is so high and mighty," he snapped.

"What's that supposed to mean?!" Lily hissed angrily.

"Hanging out with Potter and his little followers, like you're suddenly fine with him being an asshole!"

"So this is about James, is it?" Lily said incredulously.

"You're getting awfully friendly with that lot these days."

"So what, I hardly think that's really on the same level as your lot! Mary Macdonald was never the same – but that was just a harmless joke, wasn't it?" Lily raised her voice, almost shouting at him now.

"Does this mean you haven't noticed that you're running around with a monster? Such a shame he couldn't be here tonight."

Lily stared at him, confused, but only for a moment as Severus continued.

"An arrogant toerag, a blood traitor, a coward… and a werewolf. Where's your moral high ground gone -" He stopped mid-sentence as Lily's wand paused an inch from his neck.

"You are incredibly lucky," Lily began in a voice like ice "That I am actually aware of Remus' condition." Severus tried to reach for his own wand, but Lily fished it out of his pocket before he could and flung it over her shoulder without looking. "You won't be needing that, you vile scum." His eyes were wide with fear, and she jabbed the wand into his throat to make her point clear as she continued speaking.

"Remus is ten thousand times the man that you are, _Snivellus_ , and if you so much as breathe another word about this to anyone else – and I mean anyone, none of your disgusting little cronies in Slytherin – well, I'm not a murderer like they aspire to be, but you'll live to regret it, understood?" She was mere inches away from him now, almost face to face but for the half a foot height difference, and he shrank away from her.

" _Understood_?" she snapped. Severus nodded carefully. "Now get the fuck away from me."

She turned and walked away – "Lily?" – past Severus' wand lying on the floor – "Lily, please, wait!" – past the open doors to the ball and the party beyond which already seemed like a different night entirely, and up the main staircase. She maintained her façade of calm all the way back to Gryffindor Tower, barefoot (she'd left her shoes in the hall) and wand still hanging by her side. She hadn't exactly been lying to him – there was really only one thing that fit Remus' pattern of disappearances and illnesses – but to have it confirmed… She stifled a sob, and then remembered that she was alone and gave in.

Lily lay in the dark for a long time, tears running down her face. She guessed it was sometime after one when the others not so quietly stumbled in, giggling and whispering to one another, but she didn't move, just stayed there and waited to fall asleep.


	10. December 1977 (IV)

**Monday 26** **th** **December 1977**

As she had the day before, Lily woke up early on Boxing Day. She could hear someone snoring on the other side of the curtains, and it was still mostly dark. But where yesterday she'd woken up excited and full of Christmas spirit, now she felt… well, like shit to be honest. She wriggled out of the dress that she'd collapsed into bed still wearing last night and then buried herself in the duvet rather than getting up and dealing with the world.

The second wake up was slightly more successful. The room was silent and empty when she pulled back the curtains to find that the clock read half one in the afternoon, and she dragged herself up the stairs to the bathroom to wash her face.

Lily emerged into the common room half an hour later, fully dressed, to find it completely empty – it seemed that everyone was either sleeping off the previous night or down at lunch. She made her way down to the Great Hall. Last night's decorations had already been cleared away and replaced with the usual Christmas ones – it was almost like the ball had never happened. The hall was full of its usual assortment of people eating and chatting, a few evidently nursing hangovers. Lily joined her friends at the Gryffindor table and reached for a sandwich.

"It's alive!" Marlene joked.

"Yeah where did you go last night, I thought you said you were going to the bathroom?" Jenny asked.

"I didn't feel well, went to bed," Lily lied.

"Ah, that sucks. I'm guessing since you slept for so long you didn't notice that _someone_ didn't make it back last night?"

"Does this have anything to do with the fact that Marlene is wearing someone else's shirt?" Sirius said innocently, looking up from his plate.

"How do you know that it's not Marlene's?" Peter said, confused.

"If you want the details of my sex life Sirius, all you have to do is ask," Marlene said calmly. Sirius pulled a face and shook his head. "Thought not."

"Oh yeah, some post came for you at breakfast Lily, it's in our dorm, don't let me forget about it," Eliza said. There were several horrified reactions at the idea of anyone being awake for breakfast after last night's celebrations. "Don't look like that James, weren't you up early today to talk to your parents anyway?"

Lily's stomach dropped as her brain finally pieced the last few facts together. Last night had been the full moon – obviously, Remus hadn't been off visiting his mother – so where had the other Marauders been going? She highly doubted that they'd actually gone to get an early night… But they couldn't possibly be stupid enough to risk their lives sneaking around with a werewolf. And where was Remus going? Dumbledore had to know, so it must be somewhere safe, but where could they keep a transformed werewolf – was there some secret room in Hogwarts somewhere?

Her thoughts were interrupted as Jenny asked her something and she had to get her to repeat the question, but she was distracted all the way through the meal and back up to the dormitory. Just when she thought things couldn't really get much worse, Eliza dropped Lily's post onto her bed. There were two envelopes; one held a small card, the other a letter.

Lily made her excuses to Sirius, Marlene and Peter, who tried to drag her into a game of Exploding Snap as she crossed the common room, crawling through the portrait hole with the letter clutched in her hand.

The Owlery was empty of people, and the owls around the walls were all sleeping with their heads tucked under their wings. Lily shivered as she picked her way across the icy and dropping covered floor, wishing she'd grabbed her cloak before she left the dorm. She went to cast a warming charm, but someone cleared their throat behind her and she jumped, nearly slipping on a patch of ice.

"Hey," James caught her arm to steady her, looking concerned. She hoped he thought her cheeks were just red form the cold – Snape had wiped all thoughts of the conversation with Will last night from her mind, and why did everything have to happen at once? There was too much to process.

"What are you doing up here?" Lily blurted out, and then winced as she realised how rude it sounded.

"Just didn't think you should be running off on your own if you're ill, you seemed a bit out of it," he admitted.

"Oh. Um, thanks?" Lily went back to looking out of the window, even more confused than before.

They were quiet for a moment, looking out over the snowy grounds.

"So what's up?" James asked a few minutes later. Lily fought the urge to ask him if he was endangering his life with a werewolf on the full moon, but surprised herself by giving him part of the truth.

"My sister is getting married. They've set the date."

"Oh… congratulations?" James offered.

"She wrote me a letter." It was the first letter Petunia had sent to Lily since she left for Hogwarts (owl post, like everything else that was now part of Lily's life, was for freaks).

"That's nice of her?" He didn't really know what the right reaction was to this.

"Not exactly. Mum tried to make her have me as a bridesmaid."

"Doesn't she want that?" James was frowning now.

"Oh, she doesn't want me there at all," Lily forced a laugh.

"Well then, there's something wrong with her, not you," James said angrily. Lily shook her head.

"When we were little she was my best friend," she tried to explain "And she's marrying this… Well, the world's most boring man doesn't really do him justice – I ran off to Hogwarts for official freak training and she hates it – but Mum won't let her disinvite me completely, so I have to go. And I want to go, but I want her to want me to go, you know?"

She was horrified to realise that she was on the verge of tears in front of James Potter and hastily wiped at her eyes, hoping he wouldn't notice.

"She clearly doesn't know what she's missing out on, not having you around then," James said more gently, moving to put an arm around her shoulders. Lily leaned in (for the warmth, she told herself) and closed her eyes for a second.

"Everything's just a bit shit," she said quietly.

"We all have bad weeks," James said "Come on, you'll freeze to death up here. We should go play snap with the others, make your sister wait before you send her a rude letter telling her that you will absolutely be at her wedding and you can't wait to see her and her horrible fiancé. Bring a friend, really drive her nuts, you get plus ones to these sorts of things right?"

"That's not a bad idea," Lily gave a watery laugh as she carefully followed him down the slippery stairs.

"All of my ideas are excellent Evans, there's no need to sound so surprised."

And as unlikely as Lily was to ever tell him this, talking to James had definitely helped. Deal with one thing at a time, she told herself, and shoved it all to the back of her mind. For now, she was going to continue enjoying Christmas with her friends.

* * *

 **Saturday 31** **st** **December 1977**

Remus didn't return for nearly a week. On the plus side, this gave Lily plenty of time and space to get her head straight without another person who would notice her being unusually quiet. On the other hand though, Lily spent half the time worrying – did this mean that something was wrong (or more wrong than usual)?

In the end, this was what made her mind up for her. Lily worried because she cared. She'd meant every word she said to Snape, and really nothing had actually changed just because she was aware of it now. The best thing to do was to say nothing. Telling him would only cause a panic (and there was a very real chance that James and Sirius would do something permanent to Snape that would get them expelled at best), and whatever probably quite stupid thing they might be doing on full moon nights was their business. Werewolf or not, Lily trusted Remus, and he wouldn't let them do anything that would end in them being killed, or worse.

"Madam Pomfrey wasn't happy with me staying out so long on Christmas Day and not resting properly," Remus told the other Marauders on the morning of his release "You'll have to tell me everything I missed, bed rest gets really boring when you only brought two books."

Before they could fill him in on the Christmas ball and the week following it (which mostly involved a lot of eating, sleeping, snowball fights and playing games), Lily, Marlene, Jenny and Eliza emerged from the girls' dormitories and joined them in the quiet common room.

"Ah, excellent, we're all here!" Sirius said excitably "Everyone ready for tonight?"

"What's tonight?" Eliza asked warily. The Secret Santa had gone well (even if they hadn't figured out who gave to who just yet), but as far as she was concerned that only decreased the odds of Sirius having another good idea so soon.

"New Year's Eve?"

"Yes, what about it?"

"It's obviously the perfect opportunity for a party! We've got Moony back, I've been reliably informed that the sixth years are planning to sneak up to the Astronomy Tower – pretend you didn't hear that, Head Girl – and the fifth years and below have all been persuaded to stay in their dorms, so we can have the common room to ourselves!" Sirius was practically bouncing with excitement by the time he finished.

"This is a terrible idea," Lily sighed "But I'm in."

"Excellent!" Sirius rubbed his hands together "Right gentlemen, we've got work to do. We might not make it to dinner, but I want you all down here at eight, okay?"

"How bad is this going to be?" Jenny wondered as they made their way down to lunch.

"I would say it depends on how much alcohol is involved," Eliza said "Shall we go outside after lunch?"

"As long as there isn't another snowball fight, I'll end up with pneumonia at this rate," Jenny complained.

There was inevitably another snowball fight. They ran into Patrick and some of his friends while they were walking around the grounds, and they wasted no time at all in starting a full out war, chasing one another across the lawns and ducking and dodging flying snow.

"Shit!" someone shouted as one of the Hufflepuffs accidentally skidded out onto the frozen lake and frantically slid their way back to solid ground while everyone else stood and laughed.

"Thanks for the help guys."

"The ice is like four feet thick, you weren't exactly in any danger." Marlene launched another snowball and they were off again.

* * *

Dinner that night was quieter than usual without the presence of any Marauders, leaving Lily with plenty of time to wonder when their near constant presence in her life one way or another had become the norm.

"It's strange with none of the guys around," Jenny said, mirroring Lily's thoughts.

"Quiet," Marlene observed.

"How did we cope like this for all those years?" Eliza asked dramatically.

"Yeah, thanks for managing not to argue with James for three months straight," Jenny teased Lily.

"I'm sure he gets some credit for finally growing up a bit."

"Aww, see, that was almost a compliment! Things are getting strange this year," Eliza laughed.

They were quickly distracted from the subject by the appearance of dessert, but Lily's thoughts lingered. She might have mostly come to terms with the drama with Snape (as much as she could in just one week anyway), but she'd tried her hardest to avoid the other revelation from the night of the ball. The problem was, once you have a thought there was no unthinking it, and once you acknowledged something like that it only got worse.

It was like some special kind of torture, Lily reflected, knowing that one year ago it would have been a mutual feeling but now that she well, very much did not hate him anymore, of course he'd moved on. Not that she could blame him; she'd made her lack of interest crystal clear over the years.

"Alright there Lily?" Jenny nudged her, pulling her back to the present.

"Hmm? Oh, fine, just thinking." She returned to the conversation, forcing herself to pay attention again.

"If you mention homework right now Elizabeth I swear," Marlene was saying.

"I'll mention it for her then, we really should get the rest of our homework done next week before we're back in classes and getting more of it," Lily said.

The tables cleared of plates, goblets and cutlery, reminding them of the time, and they were among the last to leave the room. The corridors and staircases echoed with their chatter and laughter as they made their way back up to the girls' dormitory (the common room was still suspiciously empty of both the Marauders and anyone else – just what had Sirius done to keep everyone away, anyway?).

"What do you even wear to a last minute New Year's Eve party thrown by Sirius Black?" Jenny asked, throwing open the doors to her wardrobe.

"I wasn't really planning on changing," Marlene shrugged.

"I guess pyjamas aren't acceptable then?" Lily was lying on her bed, trying to decide if she was actually awake enough to make it to midnight.

"You're al terrible," Jenny informed them.

"What did I do?" Eliza asked, returning from the bathroom.

"You weren't here to back me up!"

"Hadn't we better head down soon anyway, it's nearly eight," Marlene said, causing everyone to check the time.

The Marauders had returned at some point during the forty minutes or so that they'd been upstairs, the furniture had rearranged so that a rough circle of sofas and soft armchairs sat in front of the fire, and someone had extinguished the chandelier so that all of the light came from the fireplace and the candles on the walls, but otherwise the common room was untouched. It looked much more casual than any other Marauders party Lily had witnessed over the years (usually post Quidditch victories). Assorted snacks, a crate of Butterbeer and several bottles of Firewhiskey sat on the floor in the middle of the circle.

Sirius looked up from where he was lounging in one of the armchairs, limbs hanging over the arms, and grinned when he spotted them coming down the spiral staircase.

"Ladies! Right on time, take a seat!"

Marlene claimed the remaining armchair, while Eliza and Jenny sat on the smaller sofa.

"Budge up Prongs." Remus shoved James upright so that Lily could join them on their sofa.

"So, I've gathered you all here this evening," Sirius paused for dramatic effect "The final night of nineteen seventy seven!" another pause "To celebrate in the only way appropriate!"

"Get on with it!" Jenny and Eliza shouted. Sirius scowled.

"We're going to play questionable drinking games and then get drunk enough that we can pass off all the bad decisions we already made as alcohol induced," Remus interjected before Sirius could continue.

"Don't say it like that Moony, have some enthusiasm!" Sirius grinned "Shall we start with spin the bottle?"

"… Can we maybe be a bit less sober when we do that one?" Marlene said "Also, don't we need an empty bottle first?"

"Excellent point, get drinking!"

"Ignore him," James rolled his eyes "Have a Butterbeer and calm down Padfoot, we're having a nice evening."

Lily realised her mistake in seating choice seconds later when James reached past her for a bottle of Butterbeer, bare arm brushing against hers.

They chatted aimlessly for a while, telling Remus stupid stories of the things that had happened while he was gone.

"Sirius nearly fell out of that big tree down by the lake during a snowball fight, it was spectacular," James said gleefully "He was sitting on this branch summoning snow to throw, then Lily froze the snow underneath him solid and he slid straight round, he was hanging off upside down for age!"

"Okay, okay, it wasn't that funny!" Sirius folded his arms as the others howled with laughter at the memory.

"Please tell me that one of you took photos," Remus said.

"There are no photos!" Sirius blurted out incriminatingly fast "Nope, none."

"I'll show you later," Lily whispered, smiling innocently at Sirius.

"I can't believe it's nearly the year we graduate," Jenny said when she was halfway through her own Butterbeer "Next New Year's we'll all be out in the world doing who knows what."

"Right, if we're getting to painful premature nostalgia then it's actually time for drinking games," Sirius cut in before anyone else could reply "Anyone else for Firewhiskey?"

"Fine," Marlene relented "But we're still not starting with spin the bottle!"

"Everyone get a drink then, Never Have I Ever to start, if her Highness doesn't have any objections to that?"

Marlene stuck her tongue out and reached for a glass and the bottle of Firewhiskey, passing it on around the circle.

"First the rules! I'm guessing I don't need to explain how to play this one but needless to say nothing leaves this room. We aren't assholes," Sirius said seriously "Not usually, anyway." Lily snorted.

"So we drink if we haven't done it right?" Peter asked anxiously. There was a collective groan from the room.

"Other way around Wormtail, drink if you _have_ done the thing," James sighed.

"Eliza, start us off?" Sirius pointed across the circle.

"Me? Umm… Never have I ever, I don't know, broken a bone?"

"So now you drink, Pete," Remus added, taking a sip from his own glass.

"Never have I ever cheated on a test," Jenny said once they were done drinking. All of the Marauders drank except for Remus.

"Let's get the obvious out of the way here," said Sirius "Never have I ever kissed anyone, except I have." Predictably, or so Lily thought, everyone drank. Peter's eyes went wide when he spotted Remus drinking.

"Who'd you kiss?!" he exclaimed. Remus went slightly red.

"We're not playing truth or dare," he pointed out ("Yet," Sirius muttered) "Never have I ever stayed up all night."

"Never have I ever had a crush on someone in this room." Lily nearly choked on the crisps she'd been eating, and Marlene started laughing when she was the only person in the room not to drink. "Seriously? Our friend group is getting weirdly incestuous." Everyone else was pointedly not making eye contact with anyone (except Sirius, who seemed far too relaxed about the whole thing).

Within another few rounds Sirius and Marlene were refilling their glasses.

"Okay, okay, following up on my last point… Never have I ever kissed anyone here," Marlene said smugly. Remus took a drink surreptitiously, hoping that no one would notice, but fortunately most were distracted by Jenny and Eliza drinking.

"Never have I ever been caught having sex in a public place," Jenny said quickly.

"Is the Astronomy Tower really public though?" Marlene asked, unashamed, and then drank anyway.

"Never have I ever had a crush on a teacher," Lily called, reaching for more food.

"Well, have you _seen_ Professor McGonagall?" Sirius mock fanned himself as they laughed.

"Right, I need the bathroom," Marlene stood twenty minutes later, when some people were starting to head towards really quite tipsy.

"I think we've pretty much exhausted Never Have I Ever anyway," James said, pouring himself another glass of Firewhiskey "Lily?"

"Hmm? Oh, thanks." She held her glass out.

"Can we break out the cake?" Remus was eying a box in the middle of the food pile.

"There's cake?" Eliza made grabby hands for the box.

"Of course there's cake, Moony is here. Although he's already down a glass of Firewhiskey, so maybe he isn't," Sirius joked. Remus stuck his tongue out.

"Seems just like Remus to me," Lily muttered, receiving an elbow to the ribs from her right in response.

"What? What was that Lily?" Sirius leaned forward in his seat, grinning widely.

"Nothing, she didn't say anything!" Remus said quickly.

"You know what, I think it's time for truth or dare, if you lot are done with cake," Sirius suggested "I'll start shall I, Lily, truth or dare?"

"Why me, you could just ask Remus."

"This is far more fun, and you're more likely to actually say truth. Now, truth or dare?"

"Fair enough, truth," Lily said, and Remus groaned.

"Traitor."

"What do you mean, 'seems like Remus to you'?"

"That can't be a proper truth," Remus protested. Everyone ignored him.

"So the first Slug Club dinner after we were both seventeen," Lily began "Remus remembered that we're allowed wine now," Remus was hiding his face in his hands "We thought it might make things more interesting… Except, it wasn't a very exciting meal… and he drank a bottle or so on his own."

"It was not a whole bottle!"

"True, it was closer to one and a half, I was being nice," Lily smirked "And he was insisting that he wasn't drunk every time I tried to get him to leave."

"You weren't that sober yourself…"

"So then Professor Slughorn tried to start a conversation with him, and it turned into an argument over why anyone would want crystallised pineapple when there's chocolate in the world," Everyone was laughing at the idea of a drunken Remus defending his love for chocolate "And I thought that was the peak of the evening, but then when we did leave," Lily was nearly crying with laughter as she tried to speak "He couldn't even walk in a straight line, we got lost three times on the way from the dungeons to Gryffindor Tower, and we spent half an hour on one staircase because he fell in a trick step and got stuck!"

"You got drunk and you didn't even tell us?!" James said in surprise.

"Yes, alright, moving on, your turn Lily," Remus said.

"Umm, Sirius, truth or dare?"

"Dare of course!"

"What time is it, half nine? Okay, go out into the corridors and declare your love to the first person you find – even if it's a teacher."

"No problemo Evans, who'll be my witness?" Sirius jumped up.

"Oh I need to see this," Eliza got to her feet.

"Chuck us the Firewhiskey Marlene," James said once they'd gone, and they all topped off their glasses again.

"How long do you reckon they'll be?" she asked.

"Depends how many people are around I guess, hope it's not too long anyway."

* * *

"I've had a brilliant idea!" Sirius shouted as he climbed back through the portrait hole into the common room.

"He also got down on one knee and told a terrified looking fourth year that he loved her and needed her in his life," Eliza followed him through, still laughing.

"Yes, yes, dare complete, but my idea – give me an empty bottle," Sirius spun the bottle "James! Truth or dare?"

"That's your great idea? Really? Anyway, truth, I can't be bothered with moving right now," James said. And he did seem quite comfortable where he was, one arm lying along the back of the sofa behind Lily, who wasn't at all aware of this fact. Not a bit. And her face was red because it was really warm in here.

"Hurry up Sirius, before midnight would be nice," Marlene said when Sirius didn't respond for a minute.

"It's hard to think of good truths! I need something that I don't know the answer to yet…" His eyes lit up suddenly "Yes! James… When you and Lily made that Amortentia that Slughorn was gushing over," James groaned as he saw where this was going "What did you smell? And don't try telling us that you didn't take a sniff."

"Broom polish, apples, and I don't actually know what the other thing is, I swear," he said, colour rising on his cheeks as he grabbed for the empty Butterbeer bottle "Is this how we're going it now then?"

"Yep, spin away," Sirius waved a hand in the vague direction of the bottle.

"Marlene, truth or dare?"

"Fuck it, dare."

James leant over to confer with Sirius for a moment.

"Strip down to your underwear and go all the way to the library and back. Run or walk, your choice," he said finally.

"Alright," Marlene shrugged, removing her clothes without a hint of embarrassment and casually walking out of the room. Lily jumped to her feet to follow after her as a witness (and to get a few minutes with more than a couple of inches between her and James). She was definitely feeling the effects of a few glasses of Firewhiskey as she carefully climbed through the portrait hole.

"Don't suppose you fancy running, it's pretty cold out here," Marlene asked as soon as the Fat Lady's portrait swung shut behind them. Lily groaned.

"Not really, but I'll vouch for you?"

"They'll never believe you did it that fast anyway, never mind," she sighed.

"We can speed walk at least?"

"I can't believe you've been holding out on us all about drunk Remus for so long though!" Marlene said after a minute or two of silent walking.

"I promised I wouldn't tell anyone," Lily laughed "This is the first opportunity I've had to get it out! The more important question is, do we call Eliza and Jenny on some of the stuff they drank to if we get the chance?"

"Sirius may beat us to it," Marlene pointed out "But I really want to know who those two kissed out of the eight of us, since we can rule most of them out pretty fast."

"It wasn't me obviously, neither of us drank… Didn't they go to a party with the Marauders in third or fourth year, it could have been any of them."

"Peter didn't drink… James maybe, or Sirius… Yeah, we've just got to ask them really, haven't we?"

They'd made it to the library by this point, and they were just about to turn back when they found themselves face to face with Will and a few other Ravenclaw seventh years just leaving. None of them seemed to know quite where to look when faced with Marlene wearing only matching scarlet underwear and looking utterly unrepentant.

"Hey," Lily said, breaking the awkward silence.

"Hey… having a good New Year's then?" Will kept his eyes fixed on Lily.

"You could say that. You?"

"Not half as interesting as yours by the looks of it."

"Okay, pleasantries out of the way, nice seeing you again Will, can we go now, it's freezing out here," Marlene said impatiently.

"See you!" Lily waved over her shoulder as she followed Marlene to Gryffindor Tower.

"Right, give me that bottle," Marlene said as they took the now empty spaces on the sofa that had been Eliza's and Jenny's. Her smile widened as the bottle came to a stop. "Jenny, truth or dare?"

"Truth, I guess."

"Excellent. Who in this room have you kissed?" she said promptly. Jenny became very interested in her knees all of a sudden."

"Eliza," she said without looking up. There were several raised eyebrows.

"When did this happen?!"

"You've had your question Marley, piss off," Jenny stuck her tongue out.

"Aww, come on, you can't leave us hanging like that!"

"Shouldn't have asked then should you," Jenny reached for the bottle and spun while Marlene muttered something about Lily wanting to know as well.

"Well then, Lily, truth or dare," Jenny smirked.

"Truth," Lily said warily.

"I'll continue Marlene's theme, who did you have a crush on in this room?"

There was a heart stopping moment where Lily thought that she somehow knew about James, even though Lily herself had only realised it a week or so before, but then she realised what Jenny was getting at and scowled.

"You already know the answer to this!"

"They don't thought," Jenny said innocently. James was examining the contents of his half empty glass of Firewhiskey intently.

"Fine, Remus, it was in fifth year or something, bottle please."

Remus went nearly as red as Lily and Jenny handed the bottle over from her position in the armchair next to Lily's seat.

"Sirius, truth or dare?"

"Dare – can people stop saying truth to everything, we're nosy," said Marlene.

"Dares are harder to come up with too… I dare you to sing everything you say for ten minutes," Lily said after a pause to think. Several people groaned.

"You're going to regret this," James sighed. Sirius span, and the game continued.

"Wormtail, truth or daaaaaaare?" Sirius sang out in a high pitched falsetto, making everyone wince.

"Dare?" Peter squeaked, sounding like he regretted it already.

"Ask the first person you find on a date, you aren't allowed to tell them it's a dare."

Lily wasn't really sure you could call that singing, and was already regretting making this dare last ten minutes.

Shortly after Sirius' time was up (just after he'd stood on a table and belted out one of his favourite songs, taking the dare far beyond what was asked) Peter scrambled back through the portrait hole looking flustered.

"She said yes!" he said helplessly "I don't even know her name, what am I going to do?!"

The others all fell about laughing, Sirius swaying dangerously from his position on the table until Remus offered him a hand down.

"Eliza, truth or dare?"

Eliza hesitated for a moment before saying truth.

"Pete, if you don't ask her about Jenny I will hex you into next week," Marlene said pleasantly.

"What happened between you and Jenny?" he asked, glancing nervously over at Marlene. Eliza glared at him.

"Threats are cheating Marley!"

Marlene shrugged.

"You still have to answer the question."

"Fine. You remember the 'mystery guy' in fifth year?" The girls all nodded, while the Marauders looked thoroughly confused. "There was no guy… It was just Jenny, we invented the guy to keep it quiet because you lot kept assuming."

"Wait, so you two properly dated and didn't tell any of us?" Marlene looked offended.

"Not for long," Jenny said. Neither of them seemed all that bothered about it now that it was out in the open. "It wasn't anything very serious, we make better friends as it turns out."

"Anyway," Eliza retrieved the bottle "Remus, truth or dare?" Sirius stared at him pointedly.

"It's not like I've done a truth yet either Sirius, stop looking at me like that – fine, dare."

"Spin the bottle, seven minutes in heaven with whoever it lands on."

"You realise that could be you, right?"

"Balls. Except me?"

"Too late to change it now, pass the bottle over."

Several people laughed when it landed on Sirius (including Lily, who gave Remus a knowing look as they awkwardly stood to go upstairs).

It was quiet and dark once the door to the seventh year boys' dormitory swung shut behind them, cutting out the noise of other New Year's celebrations along the staircase and their friends in the common room. Remus reached for his wand to light the room, but Sirius caught his hand, stopping him.

"So," Remus said, looking down at his feet "What now?"

"I'm sure you know the rules of seven minute in heaven Moony."

"You know what I mean."

"Hmm. Well, I distinctly remember us going on a date – sorry, _not_ going on a date – a few weeks back," Sirius said, stepping closer.

"And?"

"And I never got to do this."

The kiss was brief, just a light brush of his lips against Remus' before he pulled away a little.

"Smooth," Remus snorted.

"Wow fuck you," Sirius laughed, and then abruptly stopped as Remus took a step closer, and another, until Sirius' back was pressed to the door.

"Maybe another time," Remus murmured, and kissed him properly. A significant portion of Sirius' brain (virtually everything that was left after the many glasses of Firewhiskey) gave up on logical thought. There was nothing particularly gentle about this kiss, and one of Sirius' hands found its way into Remus' hair while the other slid down his back, feeling the warmth of his skin burning through the thin shirt. He gasped, surfacing for air as one of Remus' legs slid between his own, and fucking hell this could be embarrassing but that thought was gone almost as soon as it arrived because they were kissing again and Sirius felt like he was on fire (although, again, _Fire_ whiskey).

A shark knock right by Sirius' left ear made them both freeze, carefully detangling themselves.

"Seven minutes are up, make yourselves presentable and get back down here," Lily's voice came through the door, followed by receding footsteps.

"That was a surprisingly well behaved reminder," Sirius observed as he reached for his comb and desperately tried to fix his hair. Their friends had been known to end these kinds of games by just bursting straight into the room unannounced. Remus' faint blush deepened.

"Oh, um, Lily maybe knows, well, everything?"

Sirius stared at him.

"You told her we went on a date?" he said, smile growing.

"I told her we didn't go on a date, yes. Come on, we'd better get back down before it's too suspicious."

They took their seats and Remus span again.

"Marlene, truth or dare?"

* * *

By half past eleven there had been another nearly naked trip out of Gryffindor common room, Remus had swapped clothes with Lily and had to be frequently reminded to keep his legs shut in a skirt, and there'd been an enlightening showcase of the contents of Jenny's underwear drawer as modelled by Sirius Black (over his clothes, fortunately).

"James, truth or dare?" Peter asked.

"Dare."

Sirius grinned, shaking the can of whipped cream that Peter had retrieved on his last dare menacingly, and leant across Remus to not very discreetly whisper in Peter's ear, nearly falling into Remus' lap as he did.

"I dare you to – what?" Peter turned to Sirius again.

"Wormy dares you to lick cream off of…" Sirius glanced around the circle "Eliza."

"Why me?" Eliza said resignedly.

"Why not," Sirius said "Now lie back, shirt up."

"Yeah, no, you didn't say where, you can have an arm or something," she protested, rolling up a sleeve. Sirius muttered under his breath but gave in and squirted a shaky line down her forearm. James pulled a face, but licked the cream off as instructed. Lily looked away, shifting uncomfortably, as thoughts of better uses for James' tongue came into her mind and wow she was definitely drunker than she thought.

"You alright Lily?" Marlene asked, looking up at her as she stood.

"Yeah, bathroom," Lily picked her way across the circle and up the stairs to the girls' toilet where she cracked open the window for some air and sat on the closed toilet lid.

"I'm so fucked," she said to herself after a few moments.

IT seemed that they'd given up on truth or dare by the time she returned to the common room. The more sensible people were drinking water, and Remus (still wearing Lily's skirt and shirt) was sitting on the floor in front of the radio with his wand, looking for the right station.

"Five minutes to go," Marlene said as Lily sat back down on the sofa.

"I have champagne!" Sirius announced, emerging from the boys' dorm with two bottles tucked under his arm "I've been reliably informed that Muggles drink this for New Year's." (Sirius liked lots of Muggle things such as motorbikes, some genuinely and some to irritate his family, but Muggle alcohol probably topped the list).

It took a few attempts before someone conjured up a set of glasses that had a passing resemblance to champagne flutes, and by the time Sirius had poured eight glasses it was only a minute to midnight. They all stood around the radio, leaning against one another as they waited for the countdown to start.

"TEN!"

The shouting came from the radio, the group in the common room and the other Gryffindors, echoing down the stairs and making it sound as though there were far more than eight of them in the room.

"NINE! EIGHT! SEVEN!"

Lily caught James' eye across the circle and he grinned at her. She smiled back, clutching her glass in suddenly sweaty hands as she remembered that people usually kissed at midnight. Then again, no one here was dating – well, mostly – so that was a fairly stupid thing to be thinking about right now.

"SIX! FIVE! FOUR!"

Sirius and Remus were standing opposite one another and seemed to be having a conversation made entirely of pointed looks and raised eyebrows.

"THREE! TWO! ONE! HAPPY NEW YEAR!"

"Oh fuck it," Sirius moved forwards and grabbed Remus by the hand, pulling him into the middle of the circle and kissing him hard. Peter coughed and spluttered as his champagne went down the wrong way, and there was a moment of shocked silence broken by Marlene wolf whistling loudly and then shouting "Get a room!", and then everyone spoke at once.

"Excellent idea Marlene," Sirius grinned as he downed his glass of champagne, not taking his eyes off Remus "Maybe we will." James made a strangled noise.

"We share that room!"

"Is anyone going to explain what's going on?" Jenny asked.

"It's about time," Lily said, taking a seat on one of the sofas.

"Why are you not surprised by this?" said Eliza, eyes narrowing.

"They've been secretly dating for months!" James pointed at Sirius and Remus who were still holding hands and smiling and maybe blushing a bit, and just generally being much cuter than they had any right to be.

"How do you know?!" Sirius demanded.

"Also, we haven't exactly been dating…"

"I saw you two kissing after the Quidditch match!"

"I feel like someone should tell this from the beginning," Marlene suggested "Since some of us seem to know a lot more than the rest of us."

"Can it wait until we're all sober and properly awake?" Remus yawned, pulling Sirius down onto the sofa with him. The others considered this for a moment.

"Fine," Marlene decided "So… It's nineteen seventy eight now."

* * *

By the time the clock reached one Jenny, Eliza and Peter had all fallen asleep. Sirius was talking to Marlene and James, one arm around Remus who was talking quietly to Lily, seemingly on the verge of falling asleep himself.

"Come on you," Sirius nudged him "We should go to sleep."

Marlene carefully shook Jenny and Eliza awake while Sirius woke Peter, and they all stumbled off up the stairs to their dormitories. Lily grabbed an empty bag and started picking up empty bottles and bits of rubbish from the floor and chair cushions, and then nearly jumped a mile when she turned and found herself face to face with James.

"Aren't you going to bed?"

"Aren't you?" he pointed towards the bag in her hand "You really don't have to do that."

Lily just nodded and returned to collecting bottles. She heard James sigh, and then the bag was being taken from her and gentle hands pushed her towards the spiral stairs.

"Come on, up you go… Good night Lily."

"Night James," she muttered sleepily. All that she could think was that it wasn't fair. He wasn't allowed to start being all nice and considerate and attractive now that he wasn't interested anymore.

She just about managed to strip off her clothes – well, Remus' technically – and put on her pyjamas before she fell into bed, unconscious almost as soon as her head hit the pillow.

* * *

 **A/N:** This chapter was either going to be uploaded a day late or a day early (I'm going to be separated from my laptop for a few days), so I picked early! Normal Sunday posting resumes next week :)


	11. January 1978

**Sunday 1** **st** **January 1978**

The first day of the New Year dawned bright and sunny, light streaming through the windows of Hogwarts castle to illuminate its many rooms and corridors. The fresh layer of snow over the lawns was untouched and just starting to melt under the bright blue skies.

By the time the majority of the population of Hogwarts saw New Year's Day properly, the sky was white and a small blizzard was well underway. The older students who had made it to lunch were even more subdued than they had been on Boxing Day after the ball and prone to glaring at anyone in the younger years that was making too much noise (where 'too much' meant any at all).

"Morning all," Lily joined the seventh years already at Gryffindor table "Is Sirius alive?"

Sirius raised his head from the table unwillingly to look up at her.

"Fuck Firewhiskey," he said "Fuck Firewhiskey so hard."

"It was your idea," Lily said, unsympathetic.

"How are you fine after last night, you drank as much as I did," Eliza groaned. Lily shrugged and helped herself to lunch.

The other disadvantage of New Year's Day, the N.E.W.T. students realised that afternoon as their hangovers wore off, was that things like homework deadlines and returning to classes and those big exams they had coming up in June looked an awful lot closer now.

"Why did they set us so much holiday work, this has to be violating something, the sanctity of Christmas, I don't know." Marlene was horrified to discover that her list of homework hadn't shrunk in all the time she'd been ignoring it.

"This is why you do some at the start," Lily said smugly "You've still got a week though, it'll be fine."

"What I want to know is when a whole week stopped being loads of time," Jenny said sadly "I'll be lucky if I ever leave the library again.

"Can we not talk about work yet?" Sirius muttered into the table "One more day off won't kill us."

By four o' clock that afternoon though, Sirius was forced to concede that actually, another work free day might be a bad idea. The long break away from doing any kind of class work made for slow progress, and there was a growing sense of panic amongst the students as they muttered over Potions essays and Arithmancy problems.

"This is ridiculous," Sirius grumbled as he measured his Defence Against the Dark Arts essay and found it to be five inches too short.

"Have you talked about non-verbal usage yet?" Remus asked from his position on the floor, leaning against Sirius' legs as he added a few final points to his Charms homework.

"I knew I was missing something important, fantastic, I could kiss you," Sirius said and reached for his own quill and inkpot again, flipping through the textbook to the relevant pages.

"Maybe later," Remus said as James pulled a slightly horrified face.

"It's like watching my parents kissing or something," James shook his head, returning his attention to the spidery mess of Ancient Runes covering the page in front of him.

"Fuck it, I need a break," Marlene shoved her book and parchment away, stretching.

"We could go play-" James began.

"You cannot fly in this weather, you'll freeze to your brooms," Remus said firmly.

"How about the kitchens?" Peter suggested hopefully. The girls all looked up in interest.

"Nice one Pete," James sighed.

"You said we should show them!"

"Show us what?" Jenny said.

"I said _maybe_ we should show them, but we might as well now. You know enough stuff after last night anyway." He put his own work away and got to his feet, the others following.

"Where are we going?" Lily asked as they headed down the stairs that led towards the Hufflepuff common room "Are we actually going to the kitchens?"

"You'll see in a minute, just promise you won't leave me once you know the source of the coffee," Remus said mock-solemnly.

"I'm sure we can find some other use for you," Lily said, but was then distracted as James stopped by a large painting of a bowl of fruit. He tickled a pear on the right hand side, and it morphed into a round green doorknob.

"Ladies, may we present the Hogwarts kitchens," James made a wide sweeping gesture as he opened the door to reveal a vast room, even larger than the Great Hall above, with five long tables mirroring the positions of the house and staff tables above. Lily's attention quickly turned to the rest of the room though, where hundreds of tiny house elves wearing Hogwarts tea towels were hurrying around preparing for dinner.

"Won't we be in the way?" Eliza asked as they made their way further into the room and several of the house elves rushed up, bowing deeply.

"Not at all Miss!" one of them squeaked.

"What would Misters Potter, Black, Lupin and Pettigrew be wanting today?" another said, leading them over to a clear space at the sideboard. A third house elf was already carrying a tray of chocolate pastries and cakes over. "The bread is fresh!"

"If you wouldn't mind an early dinner, whenever it's ready?" Sirius gave them a charming smile, leaning against the cupboards.

"All this time we thought it was so impressive that you could get all this stuff, and they're pretty much desperate to give it away," Lily said in wonder, turning to James as a house elf snapped their fingers and a tablecloth, eight place settings and eight worn wooden stools appeared.

"You were impressed with us?" James raised his eyebrows at her.

"Oh you know what I mean, we all figured you must be doing… well, something."

"You don't know the half of it," he grinned.

They all thanked the house elves as plates of stew and thick slices of bread were delivered to their seats, along with the usual jugs of water and pumpkin juice, and James turned to talk to Sirius and Marlene.

"So, how soon is too soon to start training for the Hufflepuff match?"

* * *

 **Tuesday 10** **th** **January 1978**

The last week of the holidays was gone before they knew it, passing in a blur of homework and searching for the inevitable lost textbooks and bits of uniform (no one knew how so many things could go missing without them even leaving Hogwarts) until someone remembered that, as seventh years, they were all perfectly capable of doing a Summoning Charm. The Christmas ball seemed a long time ago now, and they quickly settled back into the rhythm of classes and mountains of homework.

As they had at the start of the last term, every teacher began with another speech on N.E.W.T. exams, with varying reactions from the students.

"Maybe if they stopped talking about N.E.W.T.s for five seconds and taught the class there wouldn't be any problems passing them," Sirius complained as they climbed the stairs from the dungeons after a double Potions class.

"It's only twenty one weeks until exams start," Lily reminded him.

"Exactly! Twenty one weeks is ages, we've got five months, and there's no way we'll have any time to revise if they don't lay off on the homework." Professor Slughorn had given them another huge essay project straight after they handed their holiday homework in and then set them to brewing a horrendously difficult potion which had caused more explosions than had been seen in a Potions class since pre-O.W.L. days – not quite the gentle re-entry they'd hoped for after the holidays.

"Once you take out time spent sleeping, eating, in classes, doing homework and Quidditch practice or Prefects' rounds, we've got about thirty days' worth of time to revise, and that also has to include Hogsmeade trips and Quidditch matches and time to relax." Lily seemed remarkably cheerful as she spouted off this information, although this could have something to do with the fact that her potion had at least been the right colour and not explosive.

"I think I preferred it when you were just counting down to Christmas constantly," Eliza muttered, but everyone other than James and Remus (who had Ancient Runes) continued up the stairs to the library for their free afternoon, where they found Jenny frantically finishing her Divination holiday work.

"Someone make up a dream I could have had last night," she said without looking up from her textbook.

"Well-"

"Someone other than Sirius."

"A flying exam timetable chases you to the Great Hall breathing fire and then you find out you missed all your exams and got Ts?" Peter suggested.

"… You alright there Wormy?" Sirius said "Bit early for exam anxiety dreams isn't it?" Peter flushed and got out his work, and they settled down to work quietly (mostly).

* * *

"Nothing quite like watching Sirius get chased out of the library by a horde of books and an angry librarian," Marlene said happily as they left for dinner that evening "Almost like your dream Pete she looked like she might breathe fire when she found him in there."

"Do you reckon he'll realise that it wasn't Madam Pince who threw all those quills at him?" Jenny grinned.

"Nah, we should be safe. Although I'm nearly out of quills now, and we don't have a Hogsmeade trip until next month," Lily said.

"Please abuse your Prefectly powers and move it closer so we can have a day off?"

"We've been back in class for two days!"

"Two days too long, I agree."

There was a lot of stifled laughter when they joined the other three Marauders at the Gryffindor table and spotted that Sirius had missed a few bits of feather in his hair which James and Remus clearly hadn't seen fit to tell him about.

"Do we have a lot to go over for tonight's meeting?" Remus asked. Lily pulled a face around a mouthful of pasta and waved towards James.

"Hogsmeade weekends, rounds, not much else to be honest – why, somewhere you need to be?"

"No reason." Remus blushed and Sirius smirked.

"Really, I heard that the Astronomy Tower is nice this time of year," Marlene said innocently.

"You would know," Remus muttered "How's Patrick these days?"

"Well-"

"Anyway," Eliza interrupted "How bad were your potions, I can't believe Slughorn said mine was Acceptable, it was a disaster."

"I got a P," Marlene said "Apparently explosions are an automatic fail, who knew."

"You don't think they'll ask us to brew that for our practical exam do you?" Peter asked anxiously.

"Well we're all screwed if they do."

"I'm so glad I dropped Potions," Jenny said smugly, then ducked as Sirius flicked a crust of bread at her. The conversation turned to happier topics for the rest of the meal.

"We'd better get going hadn't we, wouldn't want Moony to be late for his hot date." James stood, winking at Remus.

"See, I'm clearly a catch, James said I'm hot!" Sirius could be heard saying as they left the table.

James and Lily teased Remus all the way up the stairs to the third floor, watching him turn redder and redder with every innuendo they could come up with until they reached the classroom they were using, where Remus was saved by the presence of a few waiting Prefects.

"Hey!" Lily joined Will at the back of the room "Long time, no see, how was your last week of the holidays?"

"Quiet, how was the rest of your New Years?" Will laughed.

"Ah, if I told you that then I'd have to kill you."

"That might be a nicer option than N.E.W.T.s, I swear we've had more work in one term than in six years."

"Lily!" James called across the room, not looking up from his notes for the meeting "We should probably get started?"

"Unfortunately your merciful death might have to wait, duty calls." She went to lean against the teacher's desk next to James, and they called the room to order.

"Okay, first things first, Hogsmeade weekend dates – same as every other year we pick the weekend closest to Valentine's, but can we have a vote on the March trip –fourth, eleventh or eighteenth, raise your hands for fourth?" Lily did a quick count and scribbled it on the corner of James' page "Eleventh? And eighteenth?"

"So that's the eighteenth," James took over "Second point, this term's bathroom password will be lavender, don't forget it, please pass it on to your Quidditch Captains but don't tell anyone else."

"Before we sort out the rounds for this term, Professor McGonagall has told us to make you all aware of the Calming Draughts available in the Hospital Wing for anyone who's getting too stressed about exams, Prefects have the right to refer anyone to Madam Pomfrey if you're worried."

"And obviously don't forget this applies to you too, most of us are suffering with exams here."

"Right, that's everything for today, as usual sign-ups are first come first served for the time slot you want." Lily pulled the empty timetable from her bag and dropped it on an empty table.

"Excited for your term off patrols?" James asked as everyone dived for the table.

"Oh yeah, I'd forgotten about that. The perks of having three Gryffindor Prefects in a year, I guess."

"See, I'm useful for something," James joked.

"You're useful for plenty of things," Lily said without thinking, and then quickly continued to cover it "You did that shift for me and Remus last term – you'll have to let me know if you need a night off."

"Thanks," James seemed surprised, but just then Remus emerged from the thinning crowd.

"We're doing Friday nights," he told James "Shall we go then, I think the timetable is filled?"

Lily was quiet as they walked back to Gryffindor tower, James threatening to ruin Remus' two year clean slate of detentions (miraculous for a Marauder) by playing havoc on their patrol. The one thing that hadn't gone back to normal with the return to lessons was her feelings for James – and to be perfectly honest, she wasn't sure she wanted them to anymore. It felt very normal and very confusing all at once and she wasn't entirely sure what to make of it, but all she did know was that –

"I'm so fucked," Jenny groaned into her pillow, lying face first on her bed, as Lily entered the girls' dormitory.

"Should I be asking why?" Lily said to the room at large as she dumped her bag and reached for her pyjamas to change out of her uniform.

"Best not," Marlene advised.

"Dirk!"

"Who's Dirk?" Lily said, trying to match the name to a face.

"You remember the ball, that guy who asked me to dance first?"

"Oh, _Dirk_! … What about him?"

"He asked me to Hogsmeade for the Valentine's weekend."

"And this is a… bad thing?" Lily guessed.

"No! I said yes! He's very nice!"

"I'm struggling to see the problem here, you have a date with a nice – and cute, might I add – boy who you seemed to have fun with at the ball."

"Yes, but that was just fun," Jenny explained, pushing herself partly upright to look at Lily "And now this is an actual _date_ with, you know, expectations and stuff and there's a one hundred percent chance that I'll screw something up."

"It'll be fine Jenny, seriously – it'll be Valentine's Day, all you have to do is go to Madam Puddifoot's with him and make conversation for an hour or two and there you have it, successful date."

"He's asked you out a month and a half in advance, I'm guessing he likes you enough that he won't be easily put off," Eliza added "Pretty sure none of the rest of us have any kind of dating prospects yet."

"Excuse you," Marlene muttered.

"… Okay so Lily and I will be eating our feelings this February – unless you and Will…?" she trailed off.

"They only thing you'll be eating is all the boxes of chocolates your admirers send Eliza, you could take any one of the boys you danced with to Hogsmeade" said Jenny "Actually, you could both take anyone you wanted, quit complaining."

"You literally have a date Jenny, if you can complain then we definitely can. And Will and I are just friends," Lily rolled her eyes.

"No chance of an Andrew resurgence? He got a new haircut, really suits him," Marlene said.

"That ship has definitely sailed." She shook her head.

"The question we should really be asking," Eliza began thoughtfully "Is if there's anyone that Lily wants to go to Hogsmeade with?"

"No," Lily said (a little too fast) "There's no one. Unless you count N.E.W.T.s?"

There was a pause before Marlene spoke.

"That's the saddest thing I've ever heard."

* * *

 **Saturday 21** **st** **January 1978**

"Lily?" Remus waved a hand in front of her face, and she returned to the present with a jump.

"Sorry, did you say something?"

"… I take it you didn't notice me go then?" Remus gestured to the mug sitting on the desk in front of her, and Lily blinked at the coffee in surprise.

"Shit, sorry. Thanks?" She automatically reached for the caffeine.

"Everything alright?"

"Of course, why wouldn't it be?"

"Well, seems like you've got something on your mind." Remus stacked a few books ready to return to the shelves around them.

"Just distracted," Lily said, pretending to read over her Transfiguration essay.

"People tend to be distracted _by_ something."

Lily stayed quiet.

"Sometimes talking about it helps," Remus pushed on "I was glad I talked to you about Sirius."

"… Why did… What changed, over the summer – with James, I mean?" she said eventually.

"Well, I probably should have been expecting that," Remus said thoughtfully "I guess he knows a lost cause when he sees one." And that sounded like a challenge, like he wanted Lily to deny it.

"You're saying it took him six years to realise that?" she said instead.

"Fair point. But why does it bother you – if you thought he was putting this on you wouldn't tolerate it, you're friends now, what's the problem?"

"Say what you want to say," Lily sighed.

"I think you like him."

"Of course I do, like you said, we're friends now."

"Oh come on, don't ask me to be honest and then give me that evasive bullshit."

"Just because you've got a boyfriend doesn't mean you have to play matchmaker until we're all coupled up. Also, I can think of better places to start."

Remus just raised an eyebrow in response.

"He moved on, it's not like it matters." Lily broke eye contact, looking down at the scratched table.

"He's-" Remus shook his head "It does matter Lily."

"What do you want me to say? Of course I like him, how could I not?"

"The last six years ring any bells?" Remus muttered.

"Okay, you can't tell me he wasn't a bit of a dick, but he's grown up, and, well, I know him now. And he's _nice_ Remus, he wasn't supposed to be nice and capable of being funny without humiliating people even slightly and oh fuck it let's not forget that he got hot in like, fourth year, which really just isn't _fair_ when you combine it with intelligent and nice and-"

Madam Pince cleared her throat from behind the bookshelves, making Lily turn an unflattering shade of scarlet and they both lowered their voices.

"Have you ever considered, I don't know, telling him some of this?" Remus whispered "I mean, maybe not that last part, save that for a second date at least or something, but he's not a mind reader, and you can't expect him to guess that one after your usual reaction to him asking you out."

"Not a chance in hell, I don't particularly enjoy rejection-" "Neither did he to be fair." "- wow thanks, and anyway, you guessed."

"I'm not as much of an idiot as he is, and like I said, he's not going to make any assumptions these days."

"He's not going to make any assumptions because he doesn't want to," Lily hissed "Where are you going with this Remus?"

"Why are people so irrational when they like people?"

"Why are people so infuriating when they're wrong?"

"… Fine," Remus relented "Any plans for your birthday?"

"Not sure really, nothing much, we've got so much homework… and speaking of."

They returned to their work somewhat unwillingly, labelling a series of diagrams from Care of Magical Creatures in silence for a while.

"How did you stand it, all that time with Sirius?" Lily asked quietly, almost an hour later.

"I had plenty of practice and very little hope."

"I just have the world's shittiest timing, don't I?"

"Hey, it could be worse. The chances of you running into James wandering around half naked are pretty slim, sharing a dorm was torture before."

"Fuck." Lily hid her face in her textbook, blushing again, and Remus laughed.

"Yeah okay, I probably shouldn't have mentioned that. Are these the primary or secondary limbs, do you think?"

* * *

 **Monday 30** **th** **January 1978**

The end of January came with remarkable speed, and all of a sudden there were only two topics of conversation in the castle; who was taking who to Hogsmeade come February fourteenth, and the ever present complaints about N.E.W.T.s. A seventh year Hufflepuff had already been escorted from Transfiguration class for a Calming Draught after they burst into tears and declared that they were too stupid to even get a T in their exam – the story had spread far and wide because they had failed to look down at the results of their previous spell, which had in fact worked.

The only moment when time seemed to slow down for Lily was the long night of the full moon, which she spent tossing and turning and failing to sleep after she witnessed the Marauders (minus Remus, of course) sneaking out late at night. The sudden return of her anger at Snape was quickly buried under worry for the others, and she got out of bed on Wednesday morning barely having slept, relieved to see them all at breakfast looking equally tired but unharmed and as cheerful as ever.

This morning though, Lily woke up to an empty dormitory and swore loudly into the silence, diving out of bed and grabbing bits of her school uniform as she ran up to use the bathroom. She was never the last up, so who knew how much she'd overslept – she just hoped there was still time for breakfast before Defence…

She sat on the edge of the bed to pull on her tights, and then stopped, staring at the clock on her bedside table in disbelief. It was still five minutes before her alarm was due to go off. She continued getting dressed at a more sedate pace, before heading down to the Great Hall alone.

This early in the morning breakfast was sparsely populated, mostly early risers sitting alone at their house tables, but there was a riot of laughter and loud talking at the middle of the Gryffindor table.

Moments later Lily was very grateful for the relative emptiness of the hall when her friends started up a very loud and somewhat tuneless rendition of 'Happy Birthday'. She joined them just as they reached the final line and burst into a round of applause (joined, to her embarrassment, by several of the staff members present and a few Hufflepuffs at the next table).

"We figured cake for breakfast might help with the horror of Mondays and classes on your birthday," Eliza grinned, offering her a knife. 'Happy Birthday Lily' had been written across the top of a large cake in white icing. She took the empty space between Jenny and Marlene and began cutting.

"This is why you're all the best," Lily informed them happily "Is this coffee cake?"

"You said you didn't really want a party or anything, but it's not a birthday without cake," said Remus.

"We should have a game of – Twister, right?" Sirius suggested excitedly "That was fun last time!"

"Keep it in the bedroom please," James rolled his eyes and Remus choked on his slice of cake, conveniently distracting from Lily as she felt her face heat (this wasn't the first time she'd remembered that game of Twister, the feel of James' body lying along hers…).

"Opening time!" Jenny pushed a yellow envelope across the table "And we'll all pretend that it's a group card because we thought it'd be nice and not because everyone else forgot to buy one last time we were in Hogsmeade."

"I'll let you off, Christmas was more important," Lily laughed.

The post arrived as they finished eating their cake, an owl dropping a box wrapped in silver paper in front of Lily. She ripped open the accompanying envelope first.

 _To our dear Lily, we know 17 is the big one in the wizarding world, but you're an adult to us now too! Happy birthday, love Mum & Dad_

 _P.S. Are you coming home for your Easter holidays? Don't let us distract you from your exams, but it'd be nice to have a family dinner, write back when you know._

Lily noted that there was no signature from Petunia, or any mention of the wedding.

"Aren't you going to open your present?" Marlene nodded towards the parcel and Lily pushed the thoughts aside. The box contained the usual sweets, a few books, some new Muggle clothes, and a bottle of vodka with a post-it note stuck on it which read ' _Don't tell your mum!_ '.

"Ooh, you can buy us alcohol in the Muggle world now!" Sirius said, seeming proud that he'd remembered this fact.

"You're eighteen too you know," Lily pointed out.

"Yeah but I don't have any Muggle ID."

"Like that's stopped you before," Remus muttered.

"Shouldn't we get going to Defence?" Jenny asked.

"What should we do with the cake?" Lily said, and they all looked at the remaining half of the cake sitting on the table for a moment.

"… We didn't think of that part," Eliza admitted.

* * *

"I cannot believe you're working on your birthday," Sirius shook his head in disgust as he and Remus joined the rest of them in the common room.

"The Charms is due in today, I barely did anything yesterday. Is it time for lunch then?" Lily looked up from her essay.

"Yep, somehow I've survived another hour of History of Magic so we must celebrate with food."

"You're so full of it," Remus said "You spent the whole hour sleeping."

"How are you planning to pass your N.E.W.T.?" Eliza asked as everyone packed away their things.

"Moony pays attention, only one of us needs to, it's a waste of resources," Sirius said, leading the way out through the portrait hole.

"Every time you say that I get more tempted to not share my notes."

"Ah, but now I can withhold-" Remus went as red as a tomato and elbowed Sirius in the ribs to stop him from finishing the sentence "- things."

"… Anyway, what's the plan for this evening? Lily?" asked Jenny.

"Not sure, I don't have any plans really except not doing work."

"Can I make a suggestion," Sirius began.

"No – shall we just have a night off, play some games, chill, we can get some Butterbeer or something," James offered.

"Not all of my ideas are inappropriate," Sirius muttered.

"They probably are. I like James' plan though," Remus said.

"Sounds good to me," Lily smiled.

"Excellent, James and I will go get supplies while you're in Arithmancy this afternoon, and then we can start straight after dinner so we don't go to bed too late." Sirius gave them all a look that clearly meant 'look how responsible I'm being' and Marlene snorted.

"So, lunch then?"

Lunch and the rest of the afternoon felt much like any other day for Lily – she could almost forget that it was her birthday. In a stroke of good luck Professor Vector and Professor Flitwick only gave them a little homework though, leaving her to enjoy her evening guilt free.

"Right, we have Butterbeer, more cake, sweets, chocolate… I think that's everything." Sirius dropped two bags down onto the floor with a thud. They had hurried upstairs after dinner to claim seats near the fire with a long table that they could spread all the food and games out on.

"Hey James, fancy a rematch?" Lily asked after they'd all played a wizarding game that she still didn't understand even after six years in the magical world (then again, no one would touch Monopoly after last time).

"Are you voluntarily going to play Quidditch with me?" James' eyebrows rose in surprise.

"Well the last game wasn't really fair, I didn't know what I was doing," Lily pointed out "Scared you'll lose, Potter?" She laughed at the outraged look on James' face as he grabbed the box, quickly setting up the board.

"Not at all – you can even start if you want."

* * *

"Just you wait until we tell the rest of the Quidditch team," Marlene said gleefully.

"Oh shut up," James poked the little flying figures back into the box.

"Our glorious Captain, star Chaser, genius tactician… Beaten by someone who can barely fly…" Sirius added, shaking his head in mock disappointment.

"I can so fly!" Lily protested.

"Sure, sure. I remember our first flying lesson…" James smirked.

"That was six years ago! And I wouldn't look so happy about it, like Sirius said – I just beat you!"

"That's not real Quidditch though," James argued."

"It's not far off on the tactics side," Marlene said fairly.

"Ha!"

"Fluke. Beginner's luck!" Lily just stuck her tongue out.

"Ah, the maturity of the eighteen year old," Eliza laughed at her.

"Whatever, I won," Lily yawned "And now I think I'll go to bed actually, you lot coming?"

"Well if you're offering…" Sirius joked and Remus elbowed him lightly in the ribs.

"I'll stay if you guys are," Marlene said, Eliza and Jenny standing to go upstairs with Lily.

"Obviously I let her win," they heard James saying as they left "It's her birthday and all that."

"So, good birthday then?" Jenny grinned at her.

"Perfect. I mean, except the lessons and homework and stuff."

"Of course, you need Potions class for a properly perfect birthday," Eliza teased.

"Last Hogwarts birthday though," Lily said a little sadly.

"Ah don't say that, it's supposed to be a nice day."

"It's last Hogwarts everything at the moment, we can't be sad about all of it," Jenny added.

"Speaking of, guess who found a date for last Hogwarts Valentine's?" Eliza said.

"When did this happen?" Lily asked, dropping her pyjamas back onto the bed and turning to stare at her.

"Just this afternoon, don't look at me like that!"

"Who is it? Who asked who? Tell us everything," Jenny demanded.

"You know Henry, in our Charms class? He asked me after the lesson – not exactly romantic but hey, he's nice, it should be fun."

"Are you doing the Madam Puddifoot's type thing?" Lily asked.

"No, thank fuck, I think we're just going to wander down and see what we feel like. I expect we'll end up in the Three Broomsticks or something, we should arrange to all meet up there after our dates."

"After _your_ dates you mean – it's just going to be me now, forever alone," Lily sighed dramatically and fell back onto her bed.

"You wouldn't be forever alone if you just asked James out."

"Jenny!" Eliza exclaimed.

"Oh, are we still pretending that isn't a thing? Because it's totally a thing, don't try denying it Lily Evans, we aren't blind."

"… Is it really that obvious?" Lily said after a moment.

"Only to us." Eliza joined her on the bed.

"You and Remus," Lily corrected gloomily.

"Wait, Remus knows?"

"He cornered me in the library the other week, yeah. Does this mean Marlene knows as well?"

"Of course – she actually hasn't told Sirius, don't worry, although if Remus knows then I guess he might," said Eliza.

"I don't think he would have told him to be fair, but if it's that easy to spot…"

"Well, I don't think Pete knows," Jenny said.

"If you're all just noticing this after just a few weeks though-"

"A few weeks? More like a few months," Jenny snorted.

"… Why does it always feel like other people know more about what's going on in my own head than I do?" Lily asked.

"Because you're stubborn as fuck and refused to admit anything was there with James for months?"

"Thanks Jenny. But anyway, my point is, if you've all noticed then… Well, surely he knows," Lily continued.

"I doubt it. He's not likely to take anything like that for granted, not with the history the two of you have," Eliza said.

"That's pretty much what Remus said, but he can't not know if everyone else does. And he clearly doesn't like me, not anymore, anyway."

"You realise that you didn't figure out that he liked you for six years, and half the school knew about that."

"He'd be looking for it though wouldn't he, if he cares. James isn't interested, now let's go to bed, I've got Arithmancy first thing tomorrow." Lily left to use the bathroom, and Jenny and Eliza exchanged frustrated looks.

"Well, we tried," said Eliza.


	12. February 1978

**Tuesday 7** **th** **February 1978**

"Right team, it's only another ten scheduled practices until we play Hufflepuff. We've got an excellent lead after the match against Slytherin, and we're in good form still – some of you dropped the ball – that was not a pun Black quit laughing – after Christmas, but it's improved these last few practices," James called over the chatter in the changing room as everyone pulled on their Quidditch robes.

"Oh come on, Hufflepuff's team are shite," Sirius said "That match with Ravenclaw was a joke, storm or no storm."

"That's no reason to be complacent! That kind of attitude is exactly what will win Ravenclaw the cup!" James snapped back "Hufflepuff have been training more than we have since then, they don't want to be embarrassed like that again."

"Alright Captain, it's important, we know," Marlene said soothingly, kicking Sirius in the shin to shut him up.

"Good. We won't really know what we're aiming for until after Ravenclaw have played Slytherin, currently we've got a one hundred and forty point lead but we can assume that Ravenclaw will, well, actually score something, so that gap is going to decrease – the sensible bet is Ravenclaw to win, it's the best team they've had for a long time. Today we're going to work on individual problems, we'll warm up first though, a lap on foot and then fly four okay? Right, let's go!"

They all groaned – no one particularly liked actually running – but James glared around the room and they all got to their feet and headed outside, leaning their broomsticks against the stands before setting off at a jog. Sirius and Marlene led the group, quickly turning it into a race of who could get back to the goalposts quickest ("CUTTING CORNERS IS CHEATING MCKINNON, STAY OUTSIDE THE LINE!"), while James followed along at the back to watch them run and then eventually fly, correcting sloppy grips.

Despite the many small problems that had returned over the Christmas break (there was no use trying to persuade people to keep their flying up over the holidays) he relished in the feeling of the wind in his face as he soared above the smooth green grass of the pitch, watching from a distance for a moment. Jo Sayre was practicing feinting with Marlene covering the goalposts and Devereaux sometimes coming in as a surprise defence, Peeler's face was screwed up in concentration as he practiced hitting the Bludger towards Owley so that they could make careful passes to hit better targets, and Sirius – well, Sirius was pissing around with the Snitch down by the opposite goalposts, but otherwise everyone was working hard.

"OI! BLACK! YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE PRACTICING SPOTTING THE SNITCH FROM A _DISTANCE_. TWO YARDS IS NOT A 'DISTANCE'."

"TECHNICALLY, MY LOVELY CAPTAIN, IT KIND OF IS," Sirius bellowed back, but he let the Snitch escape and turned his back on it for a few moments before resuming the chase.

James was pleasantly tired by the time he headed back inside, skipping the showers in favour of a trip to the Prefects' bathroom to soak his aching muscles (he'd decided to give Sayre and Devereaux a _real_ challenge by playing defensive Chaser to Marlene's Keeper), so he was still sweaty and gross and covered in dirt when he entered the Entrance Hall – just as Remus and Lily came down the stairs, both wearing (clean) school robes.

"Good practice?" Remus asked, raising an eyebrow at the mud.

"Excellent actually, we should smash Hufflepuff if everyone keeps taking is seriously," James said happily "I was just heading up to the Prefects' bathroom, wanted to use that ridiculous bath for once."

"We've got drinks with Professor Slughorn," Lily pulled a face "N.E.W.T. Slug Club students."

"You could always get Moony drunk again," James suggested.

"No you can't!"

"I would have thought you needed a drink after this evening," said Lily.

"What happened this evening?"

"Remember New Year's?" Remus said.

"Yeah, what about it?"

"That girl Pete asked out as a dare?"

"Oh shit! She said yes, didn't she?"

"Yeah, she's a fifth year Ravenclaw I think, Pete's freaking out over taking her to Hogsmeade."

"Wow. Yeah, I don't envy you dealing with that."

"Well, we should probably get going…" Lily said.

"Oh yeah, have fun. I should go have my bath, I guess. See you later?"

"Sure."

James went up the stairs towards Gryffindor Tower while Lily and Remus crossed the hall to the corridor leading to the dungeons.

"You're totally thinking about James in that bath right now aren't you?" Remus asked as soon as James was out of earshot.

"Remus!" Lily went red "Just because you're some kind of pervert who can't stop thinking about Sirius naked or whatever."

"And wet, don't forget wet," Remus smirked.

"You're an asshole."

"And don't you forget it, in we go."

Lily opened the door to Slughorn's office, face falling into a scowl as she spotted Snape. Honestly, these things could be pretty fun if he wasn't involved – it wasn't every day you got the opportunity to talk to a leading Potions Master outside of classes, after all. As it was though… Well, every time Slughorn referred to them jointly as his best potion makers she kind of wanted to hex him (even if it was true).

"Miss Evans, Mr Lupin! Come on in, shut the door behind you and take a seat, I think we're only waiting on a few more now," Slughorn beamed up at them. He was seated in a comfortable armchair, much squishier and more ornate than the plainer chairs set out in a circle for the students. Lily sat as far away from Severus as she could, which meant taking the seat next to Slughorn, Remus on her right. A floating tray served them drinks, and Lily settled in for a long few hours listening to Slughorn talk and maybe secretly thinking that she would actually much rather be in the Prefects' bathroom right now (and if she wasn't alone in there, well, Remus had given her the idea now and there was no shaking it).

* * *

 **Saturday 11** **th** **February 1978**

Lily refused to mope on the morning of the Valentine's weekend Hogsmeade trip. She ate breakfast with the others and then returned to their dormitory, offering advice as Jenny inevitably decided to change her entire outfit last minute and to stop Eliza from nervously picking at her nails. She even made a trip up to the boys' dormitory to help Peter (she decided it was best not to ask how he'd made such a mess of his hair when it was so short) – fortunately none of the other Marauders were present, although this did lead her to wonder where James was. Presumably Sirius and Remus were off getting an early start to their day or something, but James… Her stomach dropped uncomfortably for a moment (what if he was taking someone else), but no, there's no way he could have a date without her knowing now – Sirius would know, so Marlene would know, so Lily would know. And Remus would probably just have told her anyway. In a startlingly short amount of time Gryffindor Tower was almost empty, only first and second years left in the common room.

And it wasn't like Lily particularly cared about Valentine's Day – it was a pretty pointless holiday in her opinion – but it seemed like literally everyone she knew had a date (except for probably James), and she could hardly go to Hogsmeade on her own, it was boring that way. She would join them later in the afternoon to get a few necessities and have a Butterbeer, but she would be spending the rest of the day alone while everyone else was off having fun…

Her train of thought was derailed when she entered the library, automatically making for her usual spot, and found Remus sitting there like it was any other Saturday morning.

"Shouldn't you be off in Hogsmeade or something?" she asked in confusion.

"Sirius said he had some bits he needed to sort first, we're leaving in a couple of hours, I figured I'd find you here," Remus said, looking up from his essay "Aren't you going to sit down?"

Lily frowned at him suspiciously, but sat down and got her work out anyway. This felt an awful lot like some kind of pity plot from her friends to make sure she wasn't alone on (not even actually) Valentine's Day.

"Has everyone else gone then?" he asked.

"Yeah, Marlene dragged Pete down to the Entrance Hall to meet that girl, Jenny and Eliza left not long after." She'd promised not to mention Peter's hair spell disaster to the others, and she suspected Remus would tell Sirius who would mock Peter about it forever. "What have you and Sirius got planned?"

"He says it's a surprise, which is honestly terrifying," Remus said, but couldn't stop himself from smiling.

"Sure," Lily snorted "He's probably going to do something that's actually nauseatingly romantic and in a year or two you'll be married with ninety children."

"… Let's ignore the impossibilities of that for now. This Charms is killing me, have you done it yet?"

"Damn, I was hoping you had."

* * *

Remus left after nearly two hours of (not particularly successful) studying. While terrifying was definitely not the right word, he couldn't deny that he was more than a little nervous. Which was ridiculous, they'd obviously spent plenty of time together before (even a few Valentine's weekends), so what was he worrying about? For fucks sake, he'd pretty much been on a date with him before anyway. There was always the off chance that Sirius was actually planning something that wasn't an appropriate date activity, but Remus was going to trust him on this one.

The castle was mostly quiet and empty, everyone else already on their dates or in their common rooms, so it wasn't hard to spot Sirius leaning against the wall in the Entrance Hall, wearing Muggle clothes, hair perfectly wavy as usual.

"Hi."

"Hey, ready to go?" Sirius asked, picking up a basket that Remus hadn't noticed at first.

"We're going on a picnic?"

"Shhh, it's supposed to be a surprise Moony!"

"Well, maybe you shouldn't carry a picnic basket then?"

"Who says it's a picnic basket, it could be anything."

"Is it not a picnic basket?"

"… It's a picnic basket, okay."

"Excellent."

They fell into their usual comfortable conversations on the walk down to Hogsmeade as though it were any other day, but every now and then their hands would brush and Remus would blush like a thirteen year old and Sirius would tease him mercilessly and then do it again a few minutes later just to see his reaction. They passed through the village, seeing mostly other couples and the odd bigger group. Madam Puddifoot's was packed, but they kept walking to the outskirts of Hogsmeade where the little houses gave way to grassy fields.

"Okay, in the interest of full disclosure, the picnic was James' idea. He swore that it would be romantic," Sirius said as he spread a blanket out for them to sit on.

"I'm not sure James took the weather into account, it is February," Remus pointed out. Now that they had stopped moving their cloaks were proving to be poor protection against the cold. Sirius only looked disheartened for a moment, but instead of pulling his wand out as Remus had expected he smirked and shifted over on the blanket a bit.

"Well, we'll just have to keep each other warm, won't we? After all, we wouldn't want you getting frostbite."

"Where do you get these lines," Remus shook his head, but moved to sit closer to Sirius anyway (and he had to admit, it wasn't a bad idea) "Have you been borrowing Jenny's books?"

"No, you're still the only one who does that."

"I do not!"

"Do so, I've seen them in your bedside table."

"… What were you doing in my bedside table?"

"Nothing for you to worry about," Sirius winked at him "Now, I'm pretty sure chocolates are traditional for Valentine's Day."

"Oh Merlin I l- You're the best." Remus reached for the chocolates that Sirius had produced from the basket "… There is actual food in there as well, right?"

"We have cake too, what kind of idiot do you think I am?"

"The Sirius kind?"

"That wasn't even a proper pun."

"We've got two hours until we meet the others, what's the plan?"

"Well, like you said, we've got two hours in this lovely private, er, field, and I know a few good ways to warm ourselves up…"

"I am not having sex with you in a field, Black."

"Who said anything about sex Moony, you pervert."

"Why does everyone always think _I'm_ the pervert?"

"Because you are – wait, why do other people think you're a pervert?"

"Lily thinks about James naked," Remus blurted out.

"Where does you being a pervert come into that – wait, WHAT?"

"Can we please stop saying pervert?"

"But it's so accurate!"

"…"

"Fine," Sirius sighed "What's this about Lily then?"

"Pretty sure I wasn't supposed to tell you that," Remus said, looking guilty.

"Ah never mind, it's out now, spill."

"So Lily likes James. Really likes."

"Yeah I got that, isn't this a good thing? His ridiculous plan is working," Sirius paused and then grinned "We could double date!"

"She's convinced he's no longer interested and nothing anyone says will change her mind."

Sirius stared at him for a moment.

"Our friends are idiots, fucking hell. Okay, plan B, we'll deal with their bullshit another day. Cake?"

"Chocolate?"

"Obviously."

* * *

Lily had had a nice afternoon, overall. She'd successfully only thought about James… well, a few times. Now a few times plus one. Did thinking about not thinking about him count, really? Anyway she'd finished some homework, had a nice browse in Scrivenshaft's (much emptier than usual – clearly not a popular date destination, for some reason) when she went in to pick up some new quills, and picked up some of her favourite sweets in Honeydukes, so she was in a pretty good mood when she arrived at the Three Broomsticks just five minutes late to meet the others.

She was still only the second to arrive; Peter had managed to get a large table near the back, and was staring morosely into his Butterbeer.

"How did it go?" Lily asked as she took the seat opposite him.

"It was awful." Peter seemed glad to have someone to recount the whole story to though, right from the walk down to Hogsmeade.

"- and then she slapped me in the face and shouted so that the whole room heard before she stormed out," he concluded just as a distinctly dishevelled looking Remus and Sirius arrived, followed seconds later by Eliza and Jenny who were both giggling at something.

"Damn, what did we miss?" Sirius did a quick count and ordered Butterbeers for the table "Better make that seven!" he shouted over his shoulder as James joined the group. Only Marlene was absent (having a long term boyfriend apparently gave you more to do on Valentine's Day than a quick two hour date. No one had asked for further details after she told them that).

"Pete's date er, didn't go that well," Lily said sympathetically, patting him on the arm.

"It was kind of okay at the start," he explained "I even found out her name without her realising I didn't know!"

There was an expectant silence for a moment.

"And her name is…?"

"Oh, Lisa. We got to the café okay, and then – shit, that's her over there, fuck shit I have to go see you all later." And with more speed than most of them knew Peter could produce he was out of the pub doors and scurrying down the street back towards Hogwarts. Everyone blinked and then turned to stare (not very discreetly in some cases) at the blonde girl who had just walked in and sat a few tables away, now clearly telling the story to her own friends.

"Okay Evans, spill, this looks hilarious," Sirius demanded, still watching Lisa.

"Don't be mean, it wasn't really his fault."

"It usually isn't, that's what makes it so funny."

"Fine, but don't you dare be a dick about it Sirius. They went to Madam Puddifoot's, and he stood up to go to the bathroom just as their drinks arrived and knocked them over her," she began.

"That doesn't sound too bad, I was expecting worse to be honest," James said.

"I'm not done yet, he decided to try and help her clean it up, but, well, you know what he's like with household spells, he just made it worse… And _then_ he grabbed a load of napkins and tried to wipe up the mess except obviously the mess was mostly, well, not in a place she wanted him touching on a first date, and he didn't think it through and she slapped him in the face and started screaming at him and walked out… Oh come on, it's not that funny," Lily said exasperatedly as the others laughed.

"Yeah, poor Pete, but it really is that funny," Sirius had tears in his eyes "I never expected such a good result from that dare, this is beautiful."

"So how was everyone else's afternoon?" Lily asked, changing the subject "Things go alright with Dirk?"

"Pretty good, I'll fill you in on the details later," said Jenny.

"I'm guessing that's code for 'without the rest of us'?" Sirius said disappointedly.

"Pretty much, you're dreadful gossips."

"What about you Eliza?" James asked, cutting of Sirius' rebuttal.

"Oh, not bad. Can't say I'm particularly bothered if I see him again, but it was fun," she shrugged.

"Does this mean Peter's is the only bad date?" asked Jenny.

"Hey, you haven't asked about our date yet!" Sirius said indignantly.

"You're both sitting right there nudging each other and holding hands under the table when you think no one's looking, we don't need to ask."

"I refuse to be ashamed. How was your date with the library, Lily?"

"Oh, you know. Quality time with my favourite textbooks, what more do you want from Valentine's?" she said dryly, avoiding eye contact with James.

"Well I had an excellent time… Long hours riding the love of my life in the open air," James said, sighing happily. Jenny choked on her Butterbeer.

"He means his broomstick," Remus explained, rolling his eyes.

"Yeah, as opposed to the other love of his life, which-" Remus kicked Sirius under the table and he shut up.

"Did the picnic work out then?" James said quickly.

"We had cake," Remus said.

"That's a yes then. We should probably be heading back for dinner soon, I guess."

They all unwillingly got to their feet for the walk back to the castle, exiting the Three Broomsticks just as it started to rain, much to everyone's disgust. They pulled their cloaks up over their heads and hurried back to Hogwarts, still teasing each other and fishing for information on their respective dates.

* * *

 **Thursday 16** **th** **February 1978**

Lily was heading to the dungeons to check on the Felix Felicis before class when she heard an angry shout coming from the classroom ahead. She slowed her pace and pulled her wand from the pocket of her robes, creeping forwards, and then relaxed again as a familiar voice let out several spectacular swearwords.

"James?" she said as she pushed the door further open, finding him standing over his cauldron, fists clenched.

"What are you doing here?"

"Same thing I always do in this break? Presumably the same thing you're doing as well. What's up, I heard shouting."

Lily crossed the room to join him by his cauldron, which immediately answered her question. Whereas before it hadn't been a particularly bad effort at Felix, it now had a greenish tinge and an unpleasant looking consistency, trails left across the surface where James had clearly stirred it. She prodded the surface with her wand carefully.

"I don't know what I did," James said "It was fine last week, I swear, and I didn't touch it…"

"Obviously not," Lily frowned "It's been tampered with."

"… I know I'm not ridiculously good at Potions but I'm not _terrible_ ," he continued "Wait, what?"

"This doesn't happen by itself, someone must have added… something, I'm not sure what, you'd need to do some testing and separating to find out."

"Someone sabotaged my potion?" James said in disbelief.

Lily nodded (she was kind of itching to take a few samples of it and deconstruct the whole thing to find out what it was, she hadn't had much chance to use her new potions diary with all the N.E.W.T. stuff going on, but she wasn't sure how he'd take her getting too excited about this right now).

"Come on, we should go tell Slughorn, you'll still pass if we explain." She made to leave the classroom, but James looked even more furious all of a sudden.

"That fucker."

"What" Although, honestly, Lily already had a pretty good guess at what (or more accurately, who). Despite their pranking, the Marauders didn't exactly have a large group of enemies in Hogwarts, and only so many of them had access to a seventh year project.

"Snape. He did this, he'd know exactly what to throw in to fuck it up, the slimy little…"

"In all fairness, pretty much anything would ruin it," Lily pointed out.

"Oh come on, you know it was him, or at least one of his little friends. Come on, you're right, we have to tell Slughorn what that asshole's done."

"We don't have any proof James; we can't go accusing Se-Snape. And Slughorn thinks he's brilliant, and he's his Head of House, you won't get anywhere with that. We'll just tell him it's been sabotaged, he knows it has to be someone in our class, so he should catch Snape – if it was him – soon enough anyway, okay?"

James still looked like he'd quite like to march into Slughorn's office and start shouting accusations as loudly as possible, but he nodded stiffly and followed her out. She let him do the talking, nudging him under the desk when she thought he might say something stupid, but he held his tongue. Slughorn frowned, and went back into the classroom with them (now passing the rest of their class waiting in a line, since the lesson should have started five minutes ago) and carefully examined James' potion, occasionally muttering 'oh dear' under his breath. Eventually he straightened up and sighed.

"Unfortunately my boy, your Felix is unsalvageable. You'll have a passing mark of course, I saw your potion just a few weeks back and it was fine, but it would have been nice… Anyway, you'll borrow a few vials of someone's for the analysis lessons – we'll be figuring out what needed improving, so um, perhaps someone other than Miss Evans could give you some." Slughorn was uncharacteristically serious, and he returned to their current classroom without another word to them.

"It has come to my attention," Professor Slughorn began. His stern speech was nowhere near as effective as Professor McGonagall's, but it was so unusual to see him looking angry about something that the class fell silent anyway "That someone in this room finds it amusing to destroy other people's work. This is absolutely unacceptable behaviour, and just disgusting for a N.E.W.T. class. Now, if you step forwards, of course we will take this into account when punishing you – but you will be found out, yes, and your Head of House will be involved, and a report to the Headmaster – yes, I mean it!"

People were looking around, a few whispering – it seemed that no one had seen the ruined potion yet, since they didn't seem to know what Slughorn was talking about. Lily caught sight of Snape out of the corner of her eye, smirking down at the table and clearly ignoring Slughorn. She scowled, and slammed her book onto the table with unnecessary force as they began their work on advanced theory of combinations.

* * *

Both Lily and James were still fuming by the end of class. The majority of the class peeled off into the room where the Felix was kept to find out what Slughorn was on about, including the rest of the Marauders and Lily's friend, as James hadn't said a word all lesson, leaving them to walk through the dungeons alone, following a group of laughing students with green trimmed robes.

"… Well, it was quite simple really – as you say Mulciber, give the Muggle lovers the magic they deserve," Snape's voice floated back towards them, sounding satisfied and so horribly unlike the earnest eleven year old that Lily almost couldn't reconcile the two as the same person.

"What, you mean none at all?" Mulciber roared with laughter, the whole group sniggering. James whipped out his wand, face red with anger, but before he could say a word Snape was hanging from the ceiling by his ankle, flipped upside down and robes hanging around his face.

" _Inflatus_!" Lily hissed as the laughter faded and the Slytherins fumbled for their wands "There, asshole, now your head is big enough to fit so much bigoted idiocy in it."

Before anyone could cast another spell, someone cleared their throat a few feet behind Lily and James. Sirius was idly twirling his wand in one hand, Peter on one side of him clutching his own wand and Remus on the other, currently wandless but hand hovering just over his pocket. Marlene and Eliza were approaching just behind them, and the Slytherins eyed the new group up warily. Clearly the odds weren't in their favour, and most of them lowered their wands. Lily started up the stairs out of the dungeons, the others following. They could get Snape down themselves.

"So, anyone going to explain what's going on?" Marlene asked, jogging up a few steps to catch up with James and Lily.

"They sabotaged my potion," James said shortly.

"Yeah, I got that bit, it looks dreadful doesn't it, but did Lily actually just attack someone?"

"He had it coming," Lily muttered.

"Oh I'm sure he did, it's still a bit of a shock though – Sirius, back me up here."

"Let me enjoy this for a second McKinnon, that was the most beautiful moment of my life. It even beats that time she punched you in the face Prongs."

"When did I punch you in the face?" Lily asked, momentarily distracted "I don't remember this."

"Second year," James snorted "Ironically enough, it was for attacking Snape." Lily flushed.

"Ah. Sorry?"

"I mean, I don't think that was the only reason at the time," James shrugged.

"Sirius, we're going the wrong way," Remus spoke up.

"What do you mean, we're going – oh, History of Magic. Balls. Can we skive? We clearly need a plan of action to destroy all Slytherins – sorry, Snape and junior Death Eaters – and Binns won't even notice."

"I am not skipping class today Sirius."

"You just want to keep your ridiculously empty detention record." Sirius stuck his tongue out.

"Just go to class Padfoot," James rolled his eyes "We've got practice tonight anyway, we can't start plotting anything yet."

Lily raised an eyebrow at him.

"Not that we would be planning anything at all," he said hurriedly "Since I'm a sensible Head Boy and all that crap… Oh hell, you don't have a leg to stand on anymore, I'm plotting something and you can't stop me. Why am I even Head Boy anyway? I reckon Dumbledore's getting senile."

"No argument here," Marlene muttered.

"Come on, let's get moving, I want to go lie about in the common room while these two do work." James grinned. Sirius made a rude hand gesture, but went back towards the History of Magic classroom with Remus anyway.

* * *

James threw the Quaffle through the left hand hoop with unnecessary force, taking advantage of the fact that Marlene was letting herself be distracted by Sirius behind him. His mood alternated between anger at the gang of Death Eaters in waiting and their comments, and elation – Lily had stood up for him! And herself, partially, but he knew Lily – she might be a little hot headed sometimes, but she probably wouldn't risk a week of detentions for herself alone (they'd been pretty lucky not to get caught, although Slughorn probably wouldn't know what to do with his two favourite students attacking one another).

He ignored the slightly concerned looks Sirius kept shooting at him, and pretended he couldn't see him exchanging worried glances with Marlene, focusing on his team instead. If they could just win the cup… This was his last chance. They'd wiped the floor with Slytherin, but Hufflepuff's training schedule was getting worryingly full. James wouldn't stoop to spying on them (even if Sirius suggested it every few days), but they'd booked the pitch at what seemed to be every moment the whole team was free, even some early morning practices, and he didn't think the next match was going to be anywhere near as simple as everyone was expecting.

"Right, EVERYONE IN," James roared over the wind and rain a few hours later – the weather had taken a distinct turn for the worse.

"I want a word before anyone leaves," he said as the last person entered the changing rooms. They glared at him, wet and shivering and covered in mud, but he ignored it – they'd be thanking him when they had the best Gryffindor side in fifty years (and when they were dry again).

"Right, I'll keep it quick so we can go. I'm worried about the outcome of the Ravenclaw Slytherin match, it seems likely that Ravenclaw will take a second win which will put us in a tighter spot for the cup. Hufflepuff are training all hours, so I want us out there more too. At least one, two or more if possible, full day practices on a weekend, some endurance training in case of a long match and better practice games, that sort of thing, so if anyone has any pressing engagements – well, cancel them or have a damn good excuse, I'm going to see Madam Hooch about bookings tomorrow. That's all, good work today."

Half of the team headed straight for the showers, the seventh years included, and James stood under the hot water for a while, deep in thought.

"I was expecting more complaining about that idea," James commented lightly as he made his way back to Gryffindor common room with Sirius and Marlene.

"You're not the only one who cares about winning," Marlene pointed out "The others might care a little bit less, they're not the captain, it's not their job to worry about the details, but we all want to smash Ravenclaw just as much as you do."

"Well, we're going to do it," James said determinedly, and buried his doubts for a bit.

His dreams that night were full of fragmented images, Quidditch tactics and Snitches and Lily jinxing the Ravenclaw team until Gryffindor won the Quidditch Cup.


	13. March 1978 (I)

**Saturday 25** **th** **February 1978**

The Great Hall was packed even at this relatively early hour for Saturday morning breakfast, as it always was on a match day. Loud chanting came from a knot of people at the Ravenclaw table, crowding around their team and making rude hand gestures at the Slytherins on the next table over who were hissing insults and off-putting comments at the Ravenclaw players. The rest of the hall was rife with betting and heated debates – this game would either set Ravenclaw up to win with cup, or possibly give Slytherin a surprise second chance.

At the Gryffindor table, Marlene and Sirius were successfully distracting James from the upcoming game (it was incredible how nervous he could get when he wasn't playing) with news of the Quidditch World Cup that summer. The final two teams had been announced very early that morning, after a long-postponed series of qualifying matches. They were leaning over James' book reading the line ups for the newest teams and trying to decide which ones would win the first round of games.

"I wish I knew which one of you gave me this," James said in his least subtle attempt at worming it out of them yet.

"Yeah, we never did get that Secret Santa to add up properly," Jenny frowned.

"I guess we'll never know," Lily said, shrugging.

"Should we go down, try and get a good seat?" Sirius interrupted James and Marlene's in-depth conversation on England's chances, and whether or not they were better than Wales'.

"I'll meet you lot there, I have to go send an owl to my parents. Forgot to let them know that I'm going home for Easter next month," Lily stood up, toast in hand "Save me a seat?"

"You're going home?" James said in surprise.

"Yeah, haven't seen them in a while, they want me back for a bit. It'll be nice to get a break before exams, anyway. I guess you're staying then?"

"We're all staying. Well, except Pete. Traitor."

"I'm not a traitor!" Peter protested "Why doesn't Lily get called a traitor, huh? Mum asked me to come visit so I am."

"Lily isn't a Marauder," James said, "Are you lot all leaving then?"

"I'm staying," Marlene offered.

"Only because James keeps telling us all that we'll never win if we don't practice over the holidays," Sirius muttered, which brought them back onto the subject of the Hogwarts Quidditch Cup. Lily left them to it, and went to post her note.

By the time she'd made the walk up to the Owlery and back it was nearly time for the match to begin. Her friends had spread out over two rows of a section of seats near the top of the Gryffindor stands, and she went to sit by Remus at the back.

"Hello ladies and gentlemen and baby first years – sorry – and welcome to our third Quidditch match of the year! The teams will be out shortly, but in the meantime Madam Hooch has asked me to remind you that using magic on the players is against the rules folks, even if you think they really deserve it. Leave the game to the people on the pitch!" the commentator began, voice booming out over the stadium "Remember that this is Ravenclaw versus Slytherin, so make sure you're shouting at the right team. The popular pick is Ravenclaw, with seventy percent of students placing their wildly illegal bets on an outright win and snitch catch for the blue side, pretend you didn't heard that Professors, just relax and enjoy the show. Now, here come our players!"

Two lines dressed in blue and green filed out onto the pitch as the commentator shouted their names. They watched the tiny figures of the team captains shake hands, and then take off to fly quick laps before falling into their starting formations. James sat up straighter, quill and parchment out on the bench next to him (he needed to know everything about how Ravenclaw played this. Everything).

"… And that's Slytherin in possession, making nice progress towards the Ravenclaw goals – aaand that's a foul people! Only one chaser from each side should be in the goal area at any one time, basic rules here, penalty to Ravenclaw and a disappointing start for Slytherin!"

"What are you two doing?" Sirius had looked away from the pitch for a second to find Lily and Remus with textbooks spread on the bench between them, taking advantage of the dry weather to work on their Charms essays.

"This could go on all day, you'll never let us leave, so we brought the work with us," Lily said.

They'd managed to catch James' attention now, and he turned around, a horrified expression on his face when he spotted their work.

"But you're missing some great Quidditch!"

"And some piss poor Quidditch," Marlene observed as a Slytherin beater missed their target by ten yards.

"Well stop looking at us and watch then, you know we're not that bothered about it. Gryffindor aren't even playing."

James turned back to the game, muttering under his breath.

* * *

Over four hours later, Marlene had to concede that they might be onto something with bringing work. James was still carefully noting down Ravenclaw's favourite tactics, but there hadn't even been an attempt at catching the Snitch yet, and the ever-increasing scores were putting him on edge.

"Come on, come on, someone just catch the damn thing before this game loses us the cup…"

"Nice Bludger action though," Sirius commented as the two black balls went ricocheting off, disrupting the Slytherin Chasers.

"And Ravenclaw in possession, long pass to Summers, Ravenclaw scores! That brings the total to one ninety, one thirty to Ravenclaw."

A sudden surge of noise from the Slytherin end had everyone's eyes on the pitch.

"Black's seen the Snitch, he's closer than Gardner, he's-"

Sirius (and the entirety of Ravenclaw and their supporters) gave a victorious shout as a Bludger caught Regulus in the ribs. There was a moment of confusion, someone scored, and then –

"RAVENCLAW HAVE THE SNITCH! FINAL SCORE THREE HUNDRED AND FORTY TO ONE HUNDRED AND FORTY!"

There were cheers and celebrations, but James was frowning.

"Well, we didn't really expect anything else," Marlene said, patting him on the shoulder.

"If only it'd ended an hour earlier…"

"As long as we smash Hufflepuff then it's not an issue," Sirius said confidently "Now come on, I'm starving."

A hand grabbed Lily's arm as they joined the flood of people leaving the stands.

"Hey, you lot should come by our common room tonight, for the afterparty!" Will raised his voice over the noise. Lily spotted Professor Flitwick turning a blind eye to this blatant support of rule breaking by his Prefect. The soft spot that teachers had for Quidditch was baffling, honestly.

"Sure – we can bring some stuff, right James?" Sirius said pleasantly. James looked like he'd rather do pretty much anything else, although whether that was because of Will in particular or Ravenclaw in general was anyone's guess.

"That'd be great, if you come up at about eight I can let you in."

They nodded their thanks, and then separated as they entered the castle.

"As if we'd need his help to answer that riddle," James snorted.

"Well he is a Ravenclaw," Lily pointed out.

"Yeah, but it's a riddle that _first years_ can answer. Not exactly secure, is it?"

"Wait, have you been in Ravenclaw Tower?"

"Once or twice…"

"Or more," Remus muttered. Lily seemed to be putting two and two together on exactly how several incidents in the past few years had happened.

"Anyway, places to go, people to see, come on Wormy!" Sirius took the stairs two at a time, Remus and Peter following more sedately.

"I've got Quidditch to sort!" James shouted after them, instead heading to the Great Hall with Lily and the others for a late lunch, although he only seemed vaguely aware that they were having a completely different conversation about N.E.W.T.s.

"Ravenclaw are already two hundred points ahead, so we need to flatten Hufflepuff with…"

"Nope, doesn't matter how much we beat Hufflepuff by," Marlene interrupted James' monologue "They're on zero now, if we win they don't have a hope of getting the cup – hell, even if we lose, as long as it's close. All we need is as high a score as possible to even things out with Ravenclaw before the final match."

"And we'll get a high score, because apparently we have fantastic Chasers… or something?" Lily trailed off as everyone stared at her.

"You know nothing about Quidditch," James reminded her.

"I was being nice! I assumed they made you Captain for a reason… Although now I think about it, maybe they were trying to distract you from causing more havoc in the castle."

"Ha, as if they could!"

"I never said it worked." Lily stuck her tongue out.

"Children, children, stop bickering for five seconds so that we can have a nice peaceful lunch," Eliza said, rolling her eyes. But they couldn't help noticing that James had been successfully distracted from his Quidditch worries – for a little while, at least.

* * *

"I was expecting something tamer, from Ravenclaws," Sirius observed. The music was far louder than McGonagall would let them get away with, filling their ears with noise so that they had to raise their voices to be heard.

"It's almost as if house stereotypes are complete bullshit," Eliza matched his casual tone.

"What do you reckon their Butterbeer source is?"

"Stocking up on the trips? It's not like it's banned or anything," Lily pointed out "Wait – what's _your_ source?"

"Well in the case, I don't expect they have any of this…" Sirius ignored Lily's question entirely, pulling a bottle from his bag.

"Of course you brought Firewhiskey. Didn't learn your lesson on New Year's, then?" Remus shook his head, equal parts exasperated and fond (the default expression with Sirius).

"Right, time to stop lurking in the corner, this is a party!" Sirius said, "Come on James, I spy the victorious team, let's get the drunk until they spill their training secrets."

One hour later (after a stern conversation with Sirius about who exactly he gave Firewhiskey to and how old they should be), Lily found herself in the relative peace of the corridor. She could take five minutes and then go back inside…

"We've got to stop meeting like this," Will joked.

"Hmm? Oh, hey," Lily smiled.

"Having fun?"

"Yeah, pretty tired though."

"Well, watching people play Quidditch is very hard work." Will nodded mock-seriously.

"It is if you're with James at any rate."

"Ah, of course. Quidditch Captains get pretty ridiculous about it if you ask me."

"Tell me about it. Add in Marlene and Sirius and you've got a lethal dose of Quidditch mania," Lily rolled her eyes. There was a comfortable silence, broken by Will a few moments later.

"So, I went on a date with Evie Gardner the other week."

"Right… that's nice?"

"Sorry, bit of a non-sequitur wasn't it, I just didn't want the next bit to come out wrong…"

* * *

"Back in a minute, I just want some air!" James called to Sirius over the music. He made his way to the doorway, but paused at the sound of voices from outside.

"So I was kind of right." Wasn't that Will?

"You weren't any kind of right, we aren't dating!" And Lily, half laughing. James hesitated. He should go back in, or out, or anything but sit here listening…

"But you like him." James was frozen to the spot.

"The entire castle is going to know at this rate," Lily groaned.

"Your friends are hardly the entire castle."

"Ouch," Lily laughed again "But yeah I – I really do."

"I give it a month."

"WILL!"

"What, it's obviously just a matter of time."

"Why does everyone keep saying that?"

"Maybe because we're all right and you should listen to us?"

"And do what, I can't ask him out – he'd say no and it'd be awkward and a disaster and he's – I'd rather have him as a friend than nothing."

James closed his eyes. Of course she liked someone else. That was why she'd stopped things with Will so quickly. He didn't want to hear any more of this. He carefully crept away from the door and back towards the party, but all his previous enthusiasm was gone.

* * *

 **Friday 10** **th** **March 1978**

"What's your wand out for, Remus?" Lily asked innocently.

"You know damn well-"

"HAPPY BI-" James' singing was cut off by a lightning quick silencing charm, Lily and the others laughing at the offended expression on his face.

"Anyway, who's looking forwards to double Transfiguration? Only a few more weeks until N.E.W.T. teaching is over." Remus was looking up at the flocks of owls descending on the students as they ate breakfast.

"Do you seriously want to talk about N.E.W.T.s on your birthday Moony? You're eighteen! Come on, celebrate!" Sirius threw an arm around his shoulders.

"Honestly, this is the only celebration I need," Remus said as two owls dropped a heavy looking package on the table, rattling their plates and cutlery.

"That's got to weigh more than all our textbooks put together." Marlene shook her head in wonder as Remus unwrapped a truly enormous block of Honeydukes' best along with a card from his parents.

"Well, maybe not as much as Pete's. He's brought the whole library with him this year," Sirius snorted. Peter turned red and kicked him under the table.

"Don't be an ass," Remus frowned.

They all reluctantly made their way to the Transfiguration classroom as nine o' clock approached, Lily falling into step with Sirius.

"You're planning something for him, right?" she said quietly, keeping one eye on Remus at the front of their group.

"Yes, not until Sunday though."

"Seriously?"

"I'm always Sirius," Lily groaned at the terribly overused joke "But yes, James will strangle me if it looks like I'm not taking the Hufflepuff match seriously, we've got a final training session tonight. Oh, and it's not a surprise."

"Especially not since I can hear you two," Remus called back.

"What are you doing?" Lily asked.

"Ah, now that I can't tell you."

"Settle down please!" McGonagall called as they took their seats "Now, there are only eight hours of lessons left this term, and then we will be done with N.E.W.T. teaching as long as we have no interruptions, _Mr. Black_ ," Sirius leaned away from where he had been whispering to Remus at the next desk "Please hand your essays forwards, no excuses, and who can tell us what defines complex transfiguration?"

* * *

"Right everyone, like I said last time, this'll be a physically light session, we don't want to be too tired for the match tomorrow, but I want to run through all our tactics first before we're covered in mud." James flipped the page to his first diagram and tapped it with his wand so that the images began to move.

There were page after page of different formations and moves, and by the time they'd gone through everyone one and gotten ready to start flying it was gone half seven.

"So to recap, aggressive chasing, we want that Quaffle ninety percent of the time, and hold off on that Snitch unless you absolutely can't avoid someone getting a capture. Everyone in the air now!"

 _We can do this_ , James told himself, watching Marlene fight to block the goals as Sirius looped through the air near the opposite posts. His team were the best and Hufflepuff didn't stand a chance. He ducked back a little from a stray Bludger – some work still needed…

"Neaten up that bat work Peeler!"

"DEVEREAUX, CHUCK IT," Jo yelled.

"WHAT DID I SAY ABOUT HAND SIGNALS, SAYRE?"

"Sorry Captain!"

They only few for an hour or so before James gestured that they should return to the ground.

"Alright guys, good work. Make sure you cool down properly, then quick showers and an early night, I'll see you all in top form at breakfast tomorrow!"

James watched them all leave, an encouraging word here, a constructive reminder there… He was the last into the showers, after everyone else had started the walk back to the castle, and the last back to Gryffindor Tower, where he found Lily and Remus sitting by the fire.

"We were starting to wonder if you'd gotten lost, the others went up to bed already." Lily looked up from their quiet conversation.

"Yeah, don't let me interrupt, I just need to do one more read through of the match notes," James took a seat next to Remus and buried himself in parchment again.

"I should probably get to bed anyway, I need to get up early tomorrow and get some of this work done," Lily poked at the piles of ignored homework on the table in front of them "And I need to remember to send an owl to Mum, shit, I meant to do that today… never mind, has anyone seen my quill?" she started gathering her books together, Remus reluctantly moving to get his own work.

"Yeah, me too I guess, don't stay up too late before the match James. Night."

"Yes mother." James rolled his eyes. He was just going to read over things once more and then go to bed.

The common room slowly emptied around him, and the lights dimmed as candles went out one by one and the fire died down. He'd just close his eyes, just for a second…

* * *

 **Saturday 11** **th** **March 1978**

James woke on the sofa again, with a stiff neck and a blanket that wasn't his draped over him. He hoped this wasn't going to become a pre-Quidditch match theme. He rubbed at his neck, and sat up, noticing as he did so that his notes for the game had disappeared. He frowned. Probably Remus had found him asleep or something… He'd better give those back though. James checked the time and groaned. Half six in the morning, hours before any of the others would be awake. He sat for a moment, staring off into the distance, and then began pacing the length of the common room. He couldn't go get anything to do from the dorm without waking the others, and he needed something to take his mind off the inevitable last-minute worrying – should they have trained this thing harder, done more of that, less focus on scoring and more on seeking…

If Remus had been awake to take the notes off of him, then maybe he'd gone to the library. And maybe Lily would be there. Not that it mattered whether Lily was there or not of course – _"I give it a month"_ – as long as Remus was. He just wanted his notes back. _"It's obviously just a matter of time."_. So maybe he should go check.

This, James reasoned with himself as he walked to the library, was a completely sensible and not at all stalkerish plan. He got a very suspicious look from Madam Pince when he asked, as politely as he could, if she happened to have seen either of them this morning (searching the whole library could take all day). She shook her head and returned to doing whatever it was librarians did.

James sighed. He guessed he could do some work now that he was here, but he didn't have any of his homework with him, and things weren't quite that desperate yet. He left the library to wander the halls, taking random turns until he found himself at the West Tower. He wasn't really dressed for the Owlery (it was basically outside, which was kind of a ridiculous design for a magical castle if you asked James), but he figured a warming charm would do the trick for a quick hello to some owls.

Sudden movement caught his eye as he was climbing the stairs, and he ducked just as an owl swooped low over his head, grabbing for the wall for balance but missing and then he was falling and before he could catch himself –

Everything went black.

* * *

Bright light through his eyelids. The sound of footsteps. A sharp intake of breath somewhere below him.

"James? JAMES? Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck James, can you hear me?"

Ice cold fingers gently touched his neck. He tried to tell the disembodied voice that everything was fine, what were they panicking about, but he couldn't…

* * *

James woke up, but didn't open his eyes. It was warm here… but hadn't it just been cold? He'd had the strangest dream, although the details didn't seem to be slipping away like they usually did. He wondered how long it was until the match…

He tried to roll over and pain shot through him. His eyes shot open and he quickly muffled the pained sound as he spotted Lily, napping in a chair three feet away. Or, she had been napping, open book fallen onto her lap, but she'd woken at the noise.

"James! Shhh, don't move, I'll go get Madam Pomfrey, tell her your awake." She stood to go but James interrupted.

"What happened?" He tried to reach for the bedside table. His arms, at least, seemed to be working.

"Well, you-" Lily began, handing him his glasses.

"Wait, the match, I have to go-"

"The match is over, James," Lily said carefully, looking down at the floor like she didn't want to meet his eyes.

"WHAT?!" James forgot that he shouldn't move for a second, struggling to sit upright and sending another shooting pain through him.

"For fucks sake lie down!" Lily grabbed his shoulders and pushed him back towards the pillows, surprisingly gentle "You were in the Owlery, you must have slipped or something… But you fell down the stairs. Hit your head, broke your wrist – no, the other one, that was a quick fix," James rubbed at his left wrist, which did indeed feel perfectly normal "And a few ribs, and well, your leg. It's really nasty, needs healing more slowly or it might be weaker, that's why you have to stay down – and speaking of, will you let me get Madam Pomfrey now or do you want to try and injure yourself some more first?"

"The match, just tell me about the match," James waved a hand as though he didn't really care about the injuries (although, his head was really starting to hurt now, and he wasn't sure his leg felt much like, well, a leg). Lily looked away again. "Lily, the match."

"… They had to play without a substitute. Too short notice, someone was ill, they couldn't get hold of anyone in time."

There was silence for a moment.

"How bad?" James made himself ask.

"Two hundred to twenty." Lily, to her credit, looked genuinely sorry about the news. James swallowed hard, and then winced.

"I – I'm going to get Pomfrey now, okay?" Lily rose again and headed to the nurse's office. James stared blankly at the opposite wall. Their chances for the cup, gone… and it was all his fault.

Madam Pomfrey hurried out of the office and towards his bed, Lily following behind, and began waving her wand over him and muttering.

"How does your head feel?" She shone a bright wand light into his eyes and he squinted up at her.

"Like I hit it on a stone step."

Madam Pomfrey looked distinctly unimpressed.

"Drink all of this in one, please." She shoved a cup of murky green potion at him and he swallowed, grimacing – it tasted about as disgusting as it looked "Right, your leg now – and visiting hours were over three hours ago Miss Evans, out please!"

"Sorry… I'll see you later then, I guess." Lily stood.

"Yeah. Thanks." James waved awkwardly.

"You're very lucky that she found you when she did," Madam Pomfrey said as she poked and prodded at his leg. Clearly the potion had done its job, since fortunately James couldn't feel a thing.

"Much longer lying in the cold… Well, ridiculous, letting children go wandering around this school with no supervision…" James considered pointing out that he was hardly a child, and he hadn't been doing anything stupid, but Madam Pomfrey was still going on.

"- And your parents will be by this evening, they wanted to come this morning but I assured them you were in no immediate danger and there was no point watching you be unconscious… You need your rest, not visitors over-exciting you all the time, I told the Headmaster, this is a Hospital Wing!"

What she'd said finally registered in James' brain. He could have died.

* * *

James had to wait until the after dinner visiting hours, and then spend forty minutes reassuring his parents that he was fine, as long as you don't hug that hard Mum, ouch, those ribs are still bruised, no you don't need to go get Madam Pomfrey, I promise she knows, before he got to see the rest of the team.

They stood hesitantly around the bed, Marlene opening her mouth and then shutting it again a few times.

"It's okay guys. I know about the match, Lily told me. It's all my fault, I-"

"Don't be ridiculous, it's no one's fault," Marlene perched on the edge of the bed "And anyway, we're not done yet, there's the Ravenclaw match still."

"Yeah, we're only one hundred and eighty points down. We just need to be up by forty when I inevitably catch the Snitch!" Sirius pulled a chair closer, grinning. The rest of the team fought over the two remaining chairs.

"Wait, did you say Lily was here?" Marlene said, confused.

"Yeah, she was here when I – she was here earlier."

"Hmmm."

"Oh!" Joanna stood suddenly, immediately losing her seat "Here, we brought you the stuff you're supposed to bring to people in hospital!" She shoved a bunch of grapes at him, and Sirius produced a bunch of flowers and stuck it in James' cup of water.

"Thanks… So… Do I want to know how bad it was?" James asked

* * *

 **A/N:** Camp NaNoWriMo starts today! Since this fic is very nearly finished (writing. Not posting - there will be 22 chapters in total, I think) I'll mostly be focusing on a new Next Gen project - if you want to see what I'm up to, I'll be posting regularly on tumblr (whatpassesformymind). As always, many thanks to everyone reading and reviewing 3


	14. March 1978 (II)

**Tuesday 14** **th** **March 1978**

James spend another two full days in the Hospital Wing, with Madam Pomfrey forcing awful tasting potions on him at regular intervals and making him stretch his healing leg and eventually walk circuits of the room. She had declared that he would be fit to leave on Tuesday morning, but nine o' clock came and went with no sign of the matron. Breakfast appeared on the bedside table and then was cleared away again, and James sat in bed fidgeting impatiently.

"Right, stand up, I want to check your range of motion." Madam Pomfrey fussed over him for the rest of the morning (once she finally appeared), insisting that he shouldn't leave until after lunch, and by the time he was dressed and out he had to speed walk (well, speed limp – moving fast was still beyond him) to Potions.

"Sorry Professor," James began as he ducked into the dungeon fifteen minutes late.

"Not to worry, not to worry, I heard about your little incident, good to see you're on the mend, take a seat… Work with Mr. Pettigrew for today, we're looking at the Felix, there's, ah, plenty to analyse there for you both." Professor Slughorn returned to his discussion with Lily, who clearly hadn't had much to say about perfecting her potion.

"Weren't you supposed to be out this morning, we waited for you," Peter whispered as he boiled a bit of his potion, green smoke rising from the cauldron.

"You know what Pomfrey's like," James grabbed Peter's textbook "Should it be doing that?"

"No idea, mine didn't work – anyway, Hogsmeade on Saturday, it's nearly the end of term, we can afford a day off work, right?" Peter glanced over at what Remus was doing and poked the contents of his cauldron with a stirring rod.

"Yeah, why not mate, as long as we keep it light on the walking, my leg aches like hell – wait, why are we whispering? Slughorn's so busy talking potions over there that he wouldn't notice if we blew the room up."

"That's a real possibility the way you two are going." Remus reached over and plucked the rod from Peter's hands.

"Give us some Felix Pete, there's a separating spell or something isn't there?"

"Don't lean over it like that when you're sticking your wand around in it, it'll blow up in your face if it goes wrong." James jumped and swore, pulling his now wet wand from the potion, and Lily laughed.

"Ah, so this is your secret – really, you mess it up as much as the rest of us, you just know how to lean back."

"Yeah, that's why I was done in five minutes," Lily leaned against the edge of the desk "Look in appendix J, there's a flowchart on figuring out what went wrong. Of course, you should really learn the proper reasoning behind everything, this only works for potions that obey the rule about – oh, never mind."

James was already flipping to the back of the textbook.

"You're a lifesaver, I could kiss you – actually, take that more literally," James paused awkwardly for a second and Lily tried not to blush too obviously "The first part I mean, oh fuck, I mean, thank you?"

"It's just Potions," Lily waved him off.

"No, I mean, the other day, in the Owlery… Things could have been pretty nasty, well, worse anyway, apparently, if you hadn't been there when you were, so, thanks."

"Oh, you don't need to thank me, I was just sending a letter… right place, right time." Lily was bright red now, Remus and Sirius looking on with amusement.

"Don't worry Lily flower, we're not thanking you," Sirius grinned "It would have been a lot less hassle for the rest of us if you'd just left him there."

"Thanks Padfoot, always good to know you care," James said drily "Although while we're on the subject – Quidditch. There's no point moping about it, I realised, we just need to train even harder."

"How is that on the subject?" Lily was ignored.

"Harder? How can we possibly train _harder_?!"

"You realise you lot still have N.E.W.T.s, right?"

"We don't need qualifications Moony, all of my family will suspiciously die and I'll inherit the Black fortune and you'll be a kept man!" Sirius declared cheerfully "And James is already rich, so he can sort Pete out."

"Speak for yourself, I'm going to actually get my N.E.W.T.s!" Peter said indignantly "I don't have Quidditch."

"Anyway, Hogsmeade this weekend, Marlene wants to know if you're up for it." Lily interrupted.

"Oh, _Marlene_ wants to know does she?" Sirius asked, "Don't you want us, Lily?"

"Not particularly," Lily said, deadpan. Sirius swooned into Remus' lap.

"My heart is broken!"

"Oh shut up," Remus shoved him off "We're all going Lily, do we want to do Three Broomsticks?"

"Sure, I should get back to my table before Professor Slughorn says something though."

James snorted.

"As if he would."

"You caught me, I just want to escape the smell of Peter's cauldron."

They all looked down at the now yellowy-brown smoke concealing the cauldron.

"Fair," James conceded.

* * *

 **Friday 24** **th** **March 1978**

"Good morning class. Since we're on schedule, this will be our final lesson of new material," there was a ragged cheer from the students "But don't think that means we're done. Full timetable continues next term for the first four weeks, and there are only ten weeks left until the exam period, so you will be expected to put in as much work as possible over the Easter holidays. I will be setting a little work at the end of today's lesson, but I may as well warn you now that there will be mocks from me and many other teachers in the first week of term, and we expect to see the results you want to achieve, Now, onto our final topic…" Professor McGonagall flicked her wand at the board and began.

"That's like the fifth one of those speeches we've had this week," James groaned "It'll put people off their Quidditch practice!"

"Seriously James, that's what you're worrying about? I've got six written mocks so far! Six!" Lily shook her head "I can't believe Remus had to go home early – are you lot seeing him, or should I post him the Arithmancy notes?"

"We're seeing him, he should be back for most of the holidays," James, of course, knew that Remus hadn't actually gone anywhere "You're still okay to cover rounds tonight, right? I mean, I'm fine on my own if not…"

"Of course, I'm all packed."

"You're abandoning us! You and Pete and Eliza _and_ Jenny!" Sirius wailed dramatically.

"Oh stop moping just because your boyfriend isn't here," James rolled his eyes "Trust me, between Quidditch and revision you won't have time to miss them."

"Why does that sound like a threat?"

"We already finished Herbology, right?" Eliza asked.

"Yep, revision lesson, why?"

"Well, some of us haven't packed, actually…"

"Oh just do it before the train leaves," Marlene said dismissively "You can't abandon me, Sprout said we're getting some 'hands on practice' with plants that have sharp teeth."

"That just sounds like another reason to skip-"

"Miss McKinnon, I don't suppose you know the answer?" Professor McGonagall asked sharply.

"Uhh…"

* * *

"It's been very quiet…" Lily said as they were nearing the end of their rounds.

"Clearly, I'm just that good." James checked underneath a tapestry that Lily hadn't even realised concealed a passageway.

"Why does the thought of you having something to do with this make me suspicious?"

"Hey, I'm innocent, everyone's probably just in their common rooms for once."

They slowed to a halt near Gryffindor Tower.

"So…" James said.

"I guess I won't be seeing you in the morning."

"Yeah, I'll still be sleeping. So, this is goodbye."

"For three weeks, don't sound so down," Lily teased.

"You're leaving me! Forever! How will I survive without you?" James said, dramatically covering his face with one arm.

"Oh shut up," Lily snorted "You'll be Quidditching too hard to even notice I'm gone."

"Bit of a lost cause though."

"You'll do great. And it's no one's fault, anyway."

"Yeah… Thanks."

"Right, time for bed I think. Some of us don't get an infinite lie in tomorrow."

"Yeah, I think I might go to the kitchens, midnight snack…"

"Alright, night James."

Before Lily could turn to leave, James was stepping closer. She stood still in surprise for a second as he hugged her, until she remembered how to use her arms.

"Have a good Easter," he said as he pulled away and turned to go back down the stairs.

You are ridiculous, Lily told herself all the way up to the girls' dorm. He only hugged you. All of your friends hug, stop getting so worked up about it… about how he's warm, and how it was a really good hug… and how he smells nice… Yep, not thinking those thoughts, time to stop now.

"You're smiling," Jenny sat upright as Lily entered the room "Good rounds?"

"Hmm? Oh yeah, fine."

"Good rounds _with James_?" Marlene said pointedly.

"… Shut up."

"Oh my god, what happened?" Jenny put her book down, turning towards Lily.

"Nothing happened!" she said hastily "Seriously, calm down, it was just a hug. Perfectly normal."

"Yeah, that smile is fooling no one."

"I'm not smiling!"

"Are too," Eliza said smugly.

Meanwhile, James was cursing himself all the way down to the kitchens. _"But you like him."_ Will and Lily's voices were stuck on repeat again in his head. Stupid, stupid, stupid. It was a perfectly platonic hug. That he had initiated himself. _"I really do."_ He had plenty of reasons why he shouldn't read anything into it. She saved his life because he was lying there and that's what people do, she visited him in the Hospital Wing because they were friends, platonic friends, _"ask him out"_ , just friends.

* * *

 **Saturday 25** **th** **March 1978**

"We're back!" Lily's father called as he stepped through the front door, Lily following him. It felt like far longer than six months since she'd been here, and after the sprawling magical mess of Hogwarts the house always felt a little small. But it was home-

Dozens of boxes were stacked along the wall of the usually neat hallway.

"Ah, yes," her father waved a hand at all the boxes "Wedding preparations are well underway, you see…"

Petunia's sharp face poked out from around the open kitchen door, followed a second later by their mother.

"Lily, my darling, we weren't expecting you for half an hour! Hugs will have to wait I'm afraid, dinner will be along soon – can you set the table, Petunia?"

Petunia pushed past her a second later with a handful of cutlery, not saying a word to acknowledge Lily's presence. She sighed, and reached for her trunk.

"No, no, I'll get that, you go along now and catch up with your sister," her father looked at her hopefully. Her parents were under the optimistic impression that Lily and Petunia had just drifted apart a little, what with the boarding school and Petunia being older. Lily didn't have the heard to tell them that no, your eldest daughter just thinks her sister is a freak now.

She unwillingly moved back towards the dining room, but stopped dead as she passed the living room. Back to the kitchen it was.

"So no one mentioned that _he_ was here for dinner," Lily said casually.

"Hmm? Oh, don't start please Lily," her mother sighed, stirring a pan of gravy "They've been working on the wedding today, I invited him to stay for dinner. He's nice enough once you get to know him – isn't he Robert?"

"He, uh, knows what he wants," Lily's father said diplomatically.

"I'm not starting anything – do you need a hand, Mum?"

"I think this is nearly ready actually, grab us some plates please, and you'll have to tell us all about how school is going, not long left now!"

Dinnertime conversation was awkward. Or maybe that was just lily. Vernon talked at length about his week at work (which mostly seemed to be, like him, incredibly boring), Petunia talked about the houses they'd been looking at and brought the conversation back to the wedding at any opportunity. In retaliation, Lily casually mentioned her classes whenever she could get a word in, watching Petunia try not to wince each time.

"It's just such a _shame_ you won't be able to make it, Lily," Petunia was saying. Lily blinked in surprise – first at the fact that Petunia was addressing her directly, which generally only happened with parental influence, and second at the contents of the statement.

"No, I sent back the RSVP months ago?" And she had, ticking the little 'plus one' box on James' advice.

"Oh, but you must not have read the date properly, you'll be back at… school… by then."

"I thought the wedding was in July?" Lily asked, confused.

"It was going to be, back in May," Petunia said "But we couldn't get the venue for that date, and of course it has to be a Saturday, and this date opened up and it couldn't be more perfect… April fifteenth, but of course we didn't realise you couldn't be here until it was too late… Such a shame." She really was laying it on thick, Lily thought in disgust.

"What are you on about Tuney, Lily's term dates are on the fridge, she doesn't go home until the next day," Mrs Evans said, "More potatoes, Vernon?"

Petunia's face fell faster than you can say Quidditch. It had been worth misreading the invitation just for this, Lily thought, although she wouldn't put it past her sister to have purposefully sent her one with the wrong date on.

"Don't forget my plus one," Lily said sweetly.

* * *

 **Wednesday 5** **th** **April 1978**

Lily apparated with a _crack_ outside the imposing front gates of Hogwarts. She leant against one brick post while the squeezing sensation and accompanying nausea faded. As awful as apparating was, the addition of the wedding had made Petunia utterly impossible to live with. She'd made polite excuses to her parents about needing to do work, promised to be back in time for the big day, and then packed up her case again and left.

She walked up to the castle, levitating her luggage alongside her. In the distance tiny specks swoops and dived above the Quidditch pitch, and Lily's stomach performed some matching manoeuvres when she realised that one of those was probably James.

The dormitory turned out to be empty, and there were no seventh years to be found in Gryffindor Common Room, so she headed to the library – after all, she hadn't been lying when she told her parents she needed some books.

"You're back early," Remus looked up in surprise as she joined him at their usual table, "When did you get here? Why did you get here?" Lily shrugged.

"All I was doing was revising anyway. How have your holidays been so far?"

"The same, mostly."

"You're smiling rather a lot about revision," Lily raised her eyebrows.

"So, have you done all the homework yet?" Remus said hurriedly, blushing.

"All but Transfiguration," Lily stacked textbooks on the unoccupied half of the table next to her "Don't suppose you know anything about 'subtle wand movements in complex Transfiguration'?"

"I might… but at what cost?" Remus waved a roll of parchment at her.

"My soul?"

"Nice try. I don't suppose a certain dark haired Quidditch player had anything to do with your surprise return?"

"If only…" Well, maybe slightly. But there was a bigger issue. "Petunia," she added when Remus looked disbelieving.

"Ah. In that case, free of charge." He handed her the scroll "The old textbooks are better on this one as well."

"Thanks."

* * *

The hours passed as pleasantly as schoolwork could (well, work that wasn't Potions, anyway).

"We should get lunch soon-"

"Moony, my love! We have come to rescue you from N.E.W.T.s!" Remus was interrupted by the arrival of Sirius, still in full Quidditch gear "Wait, Lily? Lily! OI, JAMES, you'll never guess who's here!" Lily winced – Sirius' shouting was sure to attract Madam Pince – but promptly forgot all about that as James rounded the nearest set of bookshelves.

"Remus, I expect – Lily?"

"Yep, that's my name," she managed. She couldn't remember what she usually did with her hands. It seemed like the days at home had completely removed her built up resistance to the charms of James Potter. Shit.

"I do not permit shouting in my library!" Madam Pince hissed, zeroing in on the presence of Sirius and James in their muddy robes " _You_ are banned, Black. Banned! I'll be speaking to the Headmaster about this, make no mistake, now out! OUT! Before I ban the lot of you!"

Pince stood and glared as Lily and Remus grabbed their stuff and followed Sirius and James out of the library.

"Bit of a hypocrite, isn't she?" Sirius remarked, and dropped back to walk next to Remus.

"Anyway, what are you doing here? Term doesn't start for another week and a half, you know," James said, grinning.

"Just can't keep away from the library, apparently." Lily adjusted the pile of textbooks in her arms.

"Shame you didn't realise that before, you missed one hell of a party for James' birthday! We drank the whole bottle of-" Remus coughed, and Sirius broke off "I mean, we had a nice dinner and some cake, and then got an early night. Yes. Definitely what happened."

Lily laughed, and nearly dropped her textbooks, saved only by James' quick reflexes.

"Let me," he said, lifting most of the stack.

"I, uh, thanks."

"Lily?!" They'd arrived at the Great Hall to find Marlene already there "You're here!"

"So I've been told." Lily took the empty seat next to Marlene "N.E.W.T.s are starting to feel very close."

"We've got plenty of time," Marlene waved a hand dismissively "The final Quidditch match, however, is only a month and a half away. He's-" she pointed at James "had us training four days a week!"

"Well it's worth it, this morning went nearly perfectly," said James.

"What are you lot all doing this afternoon?" Sirius asked.

"Revising," Remus and Lily said in unison.

"Oh shit, that. I suppose we should…"

* * *

"That doesn't look an awful lot like… well, any subject, really," Remus observed, leaning over Sirius' shoulder.

"It's Divination!"

"That explains it," James muttered.

"Are you suggesting that Divination isn't a real subject?" Sirius exclaimed in mock outrage.

"Yes, pretty much."

"… Fair enough. Do these look enough like real tea leaf shapes to you lot?"

"That's a dick, Sirius." Marlene looked over from Sirius' other side "What does that predict?"

"I don't know, maybe Remus can tell us," James smirked. Remus turned the colour of a tomato.

"Balls. Literally." Sirius used his wand to siphon off a bit of the ink "Better?"

"Much. Good to know that Remus only has one-"

"You okay Lily?" Remus loudly interrupted.

"Hmm?" Lily stopped staring off into space, attention snapping back to the room "Yeah, sorry, just distracted. Anyone want to practice some spellwork?"

Serious practice on quills and other small objects inevitably led to bigger and more questionably relevant things, but Lily frequently found her thoughts wandering. By the time they finished the common room was noticeably messier than usual (with some interesting new features), it was time for dinner, and James' hair was electric blue.

"You know, I feel surprisingly alright about all this N.E.W.T. business," Marlene said as they made their way downstairs. "Before O.W.L.s I was shitting myself, I half expected to fail everything."

"Just you wait," Sirius said cheerfully "There's still time for all that."

"Watch it-" Remus grabbed Lily's arm just as she was about to step into the trick stair halfway down "You really are out of it today, aren't you?"

Lily sat next to Remus at dinner and let the others' chatter wash over her. Petunia, the wedding, N.E.W.T.s, James, final term at Hogwarts… there were too many things competing for a limited amount of headspace. She failed to notice James whispering with Sirius, or Sirius and Remus dropping back to do some more whispering as they left the Great Hall. She didn't even register James walking next to her until he spoke.

"Are you sure you're okay?"

"Just exams seem a lot closer all of a sudden, I guess," Lily shrugged "It's fine, really."

"Do you trust me?"

"Sure?" Lily said, confused by the turn the conversation had taken.

"Good, because I have a plan."

"I take it back."

"Hey! Meet by the Fat Lady at quarter past eleven tonight. Don't tell anyone, and dress warm." James gave her a conspiratorial wink, and then sped up to talk to Marlene before she could ask him anything else.

* * *

Fortunately, Marlene decided on an early night, and all the others had gone home for the holidays, so when the time came it was easy for Lily to sneak out of the girls' dorm. She was carrying her woollen cloak, scarf, hat and gloves, trying to look as though she was off on legitimate business as she walked through the common room. She was slightly surprised (and alright, maybe the tiniest bit disappointed) to find Sirius and Remus waiting for her outside, as well as James.

"Right! Are we ready for a midnight adventure?" Sirius said excitedly.

"Way to be discreet, Padfoot," James rolled his eyes "Let's get going."

"Where _are_ we going?" Lily asked as they set off.

"Ah, if we told you that then it wouldn't be a surprise."

"Remus?" She looked to him hopefully.

"Nope. You'll see soon… ish."

They reached the third floor without incident, and James stopped by the hideous statue of the one-eyed witch. Lily nearly kept walking for a moment, until she realised everyone else was waiting around it.

"We came out in the middle of the night to see that statue?" Lily said disbelievingly.

"Ah Lily flower, it's not just any statue," Sirius said, "Would you like to do the honours, Moony?"

Remus pulled his wand from his sleeve and raised it over the statue's hump. " _Dissendium_!"

Lily watched in shock as the hump swung open to reveal a dark hole.

"How many rules are we breaking right now, Head Boy?" she asked pointedly.

"Well, is it really breaking the rules if no one knows about it?"

"Yes."

Sirius had already vanished through the hole, with Remus climbing in after him.

"Want a leg up?" James offered. Lily was deeply regretting wearing a skirt. "There's a short slide and then it levels out, nothing to worry about, just make sure you get out of the way at the bottom before I come down."

"Right." She balanced on the edge, peering down into the darkness, and then pushed off. For a second it felt like she was falling, and she had to resist the urge to scream, but then she hit the slide, zooming towards the glow of Sirius & Remus' wands. They caught her with their free hands and pulled her to her feet, and she stepped away just in time to avoid being sent flying by James, making a much more graceful descent than she suspected she had.

They were standing in a tunnel, completely dark beyond the wand light.

"Shall we?" James asked. Sirius and Remus were walking ahead, clearly familiar with the route.

"What is this place?"

"A secret tunnel," Sirius supplied helpfully.

"We found this one back in – what was it, second year, I think?" James said proudly.

"This one? How many are there?" Lily knew that Hogwarts was rumoured to be full of unexpected things, but she hadn't really thought that people meant anything past the everyday trick steps, doors pretending to be walls, walls pretending to be doors, etcetera.

"Marauder secrets," Sirius said "Can't go telling you everything, now. You _are_ the Head Girl."

"And James is the Head Boy!"

"Now there's the real mystery."

"Oi!"

"How far are we going?" Lily asked before they could get started.

"Forty minutes walking maybe, if we keep the pace up," Remus answered.

"Ah. So, we're going to Hogsmeade then? I always did wonder how you get all that stuff."

"Moony!" Sirius exclaimed.

"Well she didn't know until you confirmed it!"

"Do you know where it goes, exactly? I mean, what are we under, between here and wherever this comes up?"

"Not sure," James shrugged "It's not like we made a map or anything." Sirius made an odd choking sound.

The walk turned out to be slightly longer than Remus' estimate, and it was almost a surprise when they reached a ladder leaning against the end of the tunnel. Lily had nearly forgotten that their walk had a destination.

"Right, I'll head up first and check that it's safe. Should be at this time of night, but you never know," James said, starting up the ladder and disappearing through a trapdoor at the top a few moments later. They only had to wait a minute or so before his head reappeared, hanging over the edge of the trapdoor.

"All clear!"

The trapdoor led to a dark room full of boxes that looked like –

"Are we in the basement of Honeydukes?" Lily whispered, wide eyed. Remus nodded and nudged her towards the stairs, which brought them out behind the counter of the sweet shop. She jumped as they were plunged into total darkness.

"Sorry," Remus said quietly "Don't want people seeing a light inside."

The store was very different in the dark to the bright and busy place favoured by Hogwarts students during the day. Lily's eyes adjusted to the dim light filtering through the window, and they carefully weaved their way through the displays of chocolate and sweets, everything appearing out of the gloom in shades of grey. She jumped at the crackling sound as James' cloak brushed against a packet of Fizzing Whizzbees.

They made it to the door without waking the owners upstairs, and then (one whispered _alohomora_ later) stepped out onto the street. Lily was instantly glad for her cloak and hat in the cold night air.

"So, what are we doing here?" lily aske, "It's the middle of the night, it's not like anything's open."

"So narrow minded," Sirius said sadly "Look at all the potential!"

"I am not-" Lily stopped as she caught Sirius trying not to laugh "Fine, what's your plan then?"

"Hide and seek!" Sirius said triumphantly.

"You're kidding."

"Haven't you noticed by now, Sirius is actually seven," Remus said.

"You've got to the count of fifty, go!"

James caught her eye and grinned, then dashed off down an alleyway. Remus had vanished by the time Lily turned around, and she rolled her eyes.

"One! Two!"

Lily set off down the road at a jog, taking random turns until she wasn't exactly sure what route she'd taken, keeping her eyes peeled for somewhere to hide. The rows of cottages offered remarkably little shelter, and she tried to remember what kind of hiding places she'd used when they'd played as children, her and Tuney and the kids from school…

She slowed down and moved into the shadows near the buildings. Sirius had to have finished counting by now, and she was still out in the open.

Lily spotted a figure up ahead, leaning against the fence separating the Shrieking Shack from the rest of the village.

"Hey," she said, stopping next to Remus. He tensed automatically.

"Don't worry, I haven't been caught yet. Although if I had been Sirius, I don't think standing around here is a great hiding place."

"Yeah, just… thinking. Have you ever been in there?"

"What, the Shrieking Shack?" She'd looked before, in daylight, and the house didn't appear to have any way in "Wasn't it new just before we started? It's not mentioned in any books really. Weird how everyone thinks it's all haunted and creepy already – why, have you been in?"

"Once or twice. There's another tunnel."

"Do I get to see that one?" Lily asked.

"No!" Remus said sharply "I mean, best not. People hear weird noises at night. Like something in pain. Apparently."

"Are you okay?" she looked at him.

"I'm fine," he said, too quickly.

Something clicked in Lily's head all of a sudden. If she was right…

"Remus…" She began carefully.

"We should probably get to actually hiding." He wasn't meeting her eyes.

"You go there once a month, don't you?" She blurted out, and then winced. That came out more accusatory than she'd intended, but she'd started now. "I mean, on the full moon. I know you're a…"

Remus' expression had turned to panicked in an instant, and he took a few steps back. She reached out automatically.

"Hey, no, I'm sorry – it's fine. Remus, it's okay."

"How long have you known?"

"… Since Christmas, for sure."

Remus sighed, and returned to the fence.

"I did wonder if you might have guessed. You had too much information."

"And I kept seeing the others sneaking out on the full moon without you…" Lily hesitated, trying to find the best way to word what she wanted to ask. "Are they… are they safe?" A pained look crossed Remus' face.

"Stupidly noble Gryffindor types. Couldn't stop them if I tried – when I tried. But as safe as they can be, given the circumstances."

"That's probably about all we can hope for with them," Lily sighed and rested her head on Remus' shoulder.

"How can you be so okay with this?"

"You're still you, and you're about the least dangerous person I know. You rescue spiders when Sirius is scared!"

"That's pretty much what he said. The first bit, I mean, he won't admit that he's scared of spiders. Not very Gryffindor."

"Oi! Are you trying to steal my boyfriend, Evans?" Remus and Lily both jumped as Sirius came up behind them, laughing "And you're both out, come on, I think I know where James is."

Sirius did not know where James was, and it took ten minutes of searching for them to find him, and then another few minutes to extract him from the bush he'd wedged himself into.

"You're too competitive for your own good, Prongsy." Sirius shook his head as James repaired the holes in his cloak.

"Whatever, I won."

"You didn't beat me," Sirius pointed out "I found you!"

They walked back towards the centre of the village, James still picking bits of twig and leaf out of his hair.

"So, how's your first night of rule breaking going?" he turned to Lily, teasing.

"Rule breaking? I've been kidnapped against my will!" Lily laughed "Remus will back me up – wait, where did they go?"

James looked around, but Sirius and Remus had indeed gone.

"I'm not sure we want to know, but there's no one to save you now!"

"Ah well. No witnesses to back _you_ up then, when you try and claim that I was enjoying myself."

"So, you are then?" he asked.

"I… Yeah. It's nice to get away."

"I know the feeling. I like coming out here at night, it's peaceful."

They wandered on in comfortable silence for a few minutes.

"Look – you don't have to tell me, or anything, but there's obviously something other than revision bothering you, so, if you want to talk, or something…" James trailed off awkwardly.

Lily stayed quiet for a moment, thinking about the impossibility of explaining to James that she developed feelings for him too late and missed her chance, or that she was worried about her sister's wedding of all things while Muggles and Muggleborns were being targeted by Dark wizards and she ignored the newspaper headlines every day because she just couldn't cope.

 _You know what, fuck it,_ she thought, remembering their discussion in the Owlery on Boxing Day. He'd been helpful then, even if she didn't think he could fix it this time.

"My sister's wedding," she burst out with "She moved it, without telling me, probably on purpose because she hates me, and I was going to take Marlene or Jenny or Eliza, like you said over Christmas, but none of them are free on the new date, and I can't not go-"

"Why not?" James asked seriously.

"She'll win, if I don't go. And Mum and Dad will ask why and – and I want to see my sister get married, damn it," Lily wiped at her eyes surreptitiously. She didn't think she could deal with crying in front of James. "But I can't face it alone, it's going to be _awful_ -"

"I could go with you."

"-and she's going to – wait, what?"

"I could go with you," James repeated. They'd come to a stop now, standing in the middle of the road. Lily just stared at him.

"I mean, shit, I'm not inviting myself or anything, but if you want someone to go with you, then, well, I'm someone." He was acutely aware that he was rambling a little.

"Really?"

"I wouldn't have offered if I didn't mean it."

"I- Sure. Yes."

"Excellent. I look very dashing in a suit, I can make her horribly jealous."

Lily very nearly said 'I know', remembering the Christmas Ball and the night she'd realised that maybe she liked James a little less platonically than she'd thought, but caught herself in time. They continued on through Hogsmeade, Lily watching James out of the corner of her eye.

"What are you smiling at? This is going to be really boring, you know. I don't know what wizarding weddings are like, but you're probably going to regret this," she warned.

"Ah, but I always said I'd go on a date with you someday Evans." James winked at her.

"Da- This is not a date, _Potter_!" Lily spluttered. Did he mean he wanted it to be a date? Oh god. No, he called you Evans. Friendly teasing. You're at that stage where you can joke about your less than friendly past. (But what if it is a date-) Lily's internal monologue was fortunately cut off by the return of Remus and Sirius.

"Lily and I have an announcement," James said, struggling to keep a straight face "The wedding is in… oh, about a week and a half, is that right dear?" Remus' eyes went wide.

"I hate you," Lily gasped out between laughter.

"Honestly, we leave you two alone for five minutes…" Remus shook his head.

"Oh, I think it was a bit longer than five minutes," Sirius smirked, and Remus elbowed him in the ribs.

"We should probably head back," Lily was starting to yawn.

Tiredness hit her hard and fast after that. The long walk back through the tunnel seemed to last forever, but later she couldn't remember anything that had been said, and before she knew it she was stumbling up the stairs to the girls' dormitories and into her bed. She was asleep within seconds.

* * *

 **A/N:** Many many many apologies for the few weeks of vanishing! I had a busy few weekends, and my chapter reminders only come on Sundays, etc. etc., long list of excuses, but here it is :) I promise it'll be a much shorter wait for the next one.


	15. April 1978 (I)

**Thursday 6** **th** **April 1978**

"So, you came back late last night," Marlene said, dropping textbooks onto her bed "I wonder, if I asked Sirius, would James have come back late too? Say, around three?"

"Why Marley, it almost sounds like you're implying something." Lily tried very hard not to blush. It wasn't like anything had actually happened.

"Damn right I am, what happened?"

"Who says anything happened?"

"Your evasive answers do, now come on. Don't hold out on me!" Marlene dropped down to sit on one end of Lily's bed, looking at her expectantly.

"Well…" Lily hesitated, trying to figure out how much honesty she could get away with "Okay, yes, I snuck out with James-"

"Ha! I knew it! Up to the Astronomy Tower, by any chance?" Marlene waggled her eyebrows suggestively.

"Sirius and Remus were there too!"

"Hot damn."

"It wasn't like that!" Lily protested.

"Sure. So where _did_ you go?"

"Just around," she said vaguely.

"And what did you do, around?"

"We played hide and seek-"

"A bit like this conversation then," Marlene interjected.

"Oh fuck it. James is coming to Petunia's wedding with me and I have no idea what's going on."

"He's WHAT?"

"Coming to the wedding with me." Lily's voice was muffled by the pillow she had buried her face in.

"You're going on a date?!"

"It's not a date!"

"Lily. This is the definition of a date. You're going to wear a pretty dress and he's going to flaunt his fantastic ass in a suit and you're going to sit next to each other and get teary eyed over how beautiful the ceremony is – or the fact that your sister is signing her soul away to the most boring man alive, anyway."

"Please can we not bring James' ass into this?"

"Why not? It's quite spectacular."

"Marlene!"

"Years of Quidditch together, in the changing rooms, sometimes you catch a glimpse…"

" _MARLENE_!" Lily was torn between horror and amusement.

"Good muscles under there as well," Marlene continued, enjoying herself far too much "You ever seen him shirtless?"

"No!"

"Shame."

"This conversation is over."

"I'm just sharing important information here."

"You're a pervert."

"Patrick never complains."

"Is this what you tell Patrick as well?"

"Not usually," Marlene admitted "Anyway, back to you… What you're telling me is that you managed to invite James to _your sister's wedding_ , but not on a date?"

"I didn't invite him, technically. He offered."

"You're hopeless. Both of you."

"Yes, it is hopeless, because he's not interested anymore!" Lily said, frustrated.

"Why would he offer to go to a wedding with you if he wasn't interested?"

"Are you telling me you want to date me, because I'm pretty sure I remember you saying you would go when it was going to be in the summer…"

"Oh very funny."

"My point is, he's doing it because he's nice!"

"Nice and also head over heels for you!" Marlene waved her arms exasperatedly.

"We've been over this before," Lily sighed.

"What will it take to convince you?"

"James to actually say something! If he likes me so much then why did he stop doing something about it?"

" _Because_ he likes you! I need backup for this… Why did Eliza and Jenny go home?"

* * *

Remus' reading was interrupted (as it often was) by Sirius.

"So… what were you and Lily looking so serious about when I found you last night?"

James looked up as Lily's name, dropping his revision.

"Actually, I was meaning to talk to you about that…"

"What did she say?" James tried to sound casual.

"Nothing to do with you, calm down. She, uh, guessed my furry little problem…"

"SHE WHAT?"

"Sorry, did you just say _calm down_?" James said incredulously.

"Seriously? Do you two not think you would have noticed before now if this was a problem?" Remus shook his head.

"So… it's all okay?" Sirius asked.

"Unbelievably, yes."

There was a pause as they came to terms with someone else being in on the secret for the first time in six years.

"Wow, Wormy's going to be mad that he went home and missed all this," James said "Wait – does she know about all of us? The Animagus thing, I mean."

"Nope, left that to you to explain."

"Well… while we're on the subject of last night, I was only kind of joking with the wedding thing. I am going to a wedding. With Lily, I mean."

"She asked you on a date?" Remus said in surprise.

"No! It's not a date… well, I joke that it was a date, but… I invited myself, I guess. She needed a plus one for her sister's wedding."

"So this goes something like 'why not, she likes you' 'no she doesn't' 'yes she does' for ten minutes or so, right?" Sirius asked, doing an unflattering imitation of James' voice.

"… Right," James conceded.

"In that case, I've got things to do. Have fun, Moony."

Sirius entered the Gryffindor Common Room a second after Marlene emerged from the girls' dormitories.

"You've heard about the wedding, I take it?" she asked as they met in the middle.

"Yep. Can we lock them both in a cupboard?"

"A nice cosy one. There's a good broom store on the fourth floor."

"Tomorrow night?" It wasn't entirely clear if Sirius was serious.

"Maybe make that plan B… This wedding might work out, you never know."

"Fine, but I can't stand this much longer. It was fine when James was just pining all the time, but this is ridiculous."

"You can't talk, did you forget that they actually did have to lock you and Remus in a classroom?"

"… Shut up."

* * *

 **Friday 14** **th** **April 1978**

The remainder of the holidays passed in a blur of N.E.W.T. revision, meals and adventures around the castle with Marlene, James, Sirius and Remus, and the occasional Quidditch practice that Lily went to watch on the sunnier days. She spent more time with James than ever before – with the others, and, rarely, the two of them alone. On these occasions, she would become awkward as soon as her brain registered that she was _alone with James Potter_ , blushing and stumbling over her words, which wasn't particularly promising for the upcoming wedding.

"I'll be down in two minutes for lunch, I promise, I just can't find the underwear I want – have you seen it, I could have sworn it was in my drawer yesterday?" Lily said as she heard the door to the dorm open. Her back was nearly packed for the two nights at home, if only she could find-

"Well, I'd be delighted to help with that, but I came to double check what I need to bring."

Lily closed her eyes for a second before turning around.

"I was expecting Marlene."

"I assumed," James said, struggling not to laugh.

"How do you lot keep getting past the slide anyway, you're not supposed to be in here!" Lily said, trying to move past the fact that she'd just asked James where her underwear was.

"I think we'll keep that secret, if you don't mind. So, what do I need?"

"I don't know, toothbrush, toothpaste, pyjamas, a suit – not the dress robes bit, Muggles don't wear them."

"Right… I could just come tomorrow, you know," James said hopefully.

"Not a chance, Petunia's going to be a nightmare tonight. You volunteered to be a human shield, you're going to have to follow through on it."

"It's dinner with your parents tonight, yeah?"

"I'm more concerned about Petunia and Vernon," Lily said, confused.

"But… What if your parents hate me?"

She stared at him.

"Why would my parents hate you?"

"Well, you know… I was a dick, and all that…" James looked increasingly uncomfortable.

"You weren't a dick. Well, you were, but mostly to Snape, and you're not a dick anymore…" She really needed to stop saying 'dick', Lily thought "Anyway, I didn't tell them about that, so don't look so worried."

"You didn't tell them about me?" James was torn between feeling relieved and hurt.

"Not really, now get a move on, I'm supposed to meet Marlene for lunch."

* * *

"James?" Lily said, cautiously poking her head around the door of the seventh year boys' dormitory "Come on, we don't want to be late, it's nearly half four."

"Shit, already? Right, coming, coming just let me grab two things." James shoved a pair of pyjamas into his bag and ran up the stairs to the bathroom to grab his toothbrush and a rarely used comb.

"How will I survive two days without you Prongs? How can you leave me like this?!" Sirius lamented, lying sprawled across his bed.

"Yes, how will you possibly survive two days alone in the dorm with your boyfriend," Lily said pointedly. Sirius just winked at her.

"Okay, I'm ready," James said, bag slung over one shoulder.

Lily always forgot how long the walk from the castle to the front gates was, and she was slightly regretting packing such a heavy bag. Eventually they made it out past the wards and came to a stop.

"If you, um, take my arm? You'll need to apparate too, my side along apparition isn't great, but I can guide you."

James rested a hand just above her elbow, gripping lightly. She could feel his shoulder brushing hers…

 _Focus_ , she told herself, _before someone gets splinched_.

"On the count of three?" James said quietly.

"Yeah… One… Two… Three!"

Lily shut her eyes and turned on the spot, James turning with her. There was the familiar sensation of being squeeze through a tube that was much smaller than her, and as it faded she opened her eyes, looking at her bedroom.

Her first thought was 'oh shit'. She rarely apparated anywhere, but when she did she went to and from her bedroom, where no Muggles would see her and she wasn't likely to land on anyone (Petunia refused to believe that it had been an accident when Lily had apparated about two inches in front of her shortly after passing her apparition test). What she hadn't considered was that her bedroom had changed very little since she was eleven and had started spending most of her year at boarding school. There were new photos stuck to the walls and new books on the shelves, but also several framed photos of Lily as a child with her friends (and how many of those were there in the rest of the house, fuck) and butterflies painted onto the walls.

"Nice room," James said, hiding a smile.

"Oh shut up," Lily turned red "We should go downstairs and get the introductions out of the way, I guess."

"Yep. Sure. Excellent idea."

"Come on, they'll all like you. Well, I can't speak for Petunia, but don't take it personally…"

James snorted.

"Yeah, her opinion doesn't really concern me."

They reached the bottom of the stairs and headed towards the kitchen, where her father was squinting at the roasting beef through the oven door.

"Ah, Lily, you're back! Excellent, excellent. And this must be James!" Her mother appeared from the pantry holding a bottle of wine.

"Hi, yeah, James, this is my Mum and Dad," Lily began.

"Please, call me Robert," her father interjected "Dinner in half an hour or so, okay?"

"Can I help with anything?" James asked politely. Lily looked at him in surprise and fought the temptation to ask where James had gone.

"Oh no," Lily's mother said, "You two go on through to the living room, Petunia and Vernon are in there already."

"Right. This way then," Lily said, pointing James back through the door.

In the living room, Vernon was focused on the TV while Petunia flicked through a magazine. Neither of them looked up when Lily and James entered the room.

"Um," Lily said, but James beat her to it.

"You must be Petunia," he said pleasantly, dropping into the seat next to her "I've heard so much about you."

Petunia narrowed her eyes at him, trying to decide it he was being sincere. Lily took the armchair on James' other side. This might actually turn out to be more fun than she'd expected.

"And you are?"

"This is James," Lily cut in "James, my sister Petunia, and her fiancé Vernon."

They swiftly moved through the rest of the pleasantries and then sat in silence until they were called for dinner and went to sit at the dining room table. Lily sat next to James, opposite Petunia and Vernon, with her parents at either end.

For the first five minutes conversation was mostly limited to things like "pass the potatoes please Lily" and "gravy anyone?", and stayed polite all the way through to dessert, but eventually the topic turned to one of Vernon's favourites (as always).

"Of course, I've got a few options lined up for a new car, but we'll sort that after the honeymoon – what car do you drive, James?" Vernon asked with the air of someone ready to tell them all exactly why his car was much better than whatever James might drive.

"Oh, I don't drive," James said cheerfully.

"You don't?" Vernon said in surprise "Haven't gotten around to learning yet, or what?"

"Nah, don't really need one."

"What have you got then, a magic carpet?" Vernon said scornfully.

"They're illegal in this country, actually," James replied "I got a new racing broom last year though, absolutely fantastic, really outstrips their previous models. England considered it for their World Cup team, but went for the Comet in the end, probably the right call to be honest, mine has excellent speed but it's not a Seeker's broom." He was so excited by Quidditch that he failed to notice Vernon's look of growing confusion.

"I'd like to see where that law's written down," Vernon latched onto the one bit that he had understood "Don't think they refer to magic, last time I checked."

"Oh, we have our own government. The Ministry of Magic," James seemed to be enjoying himself.

"I supposed they need to make jobs for you lot somehow. What does your father do?"

James looked slightly embarrassed for the first time that evening.

"I suppose he's unemployed, living on benefits?" Vernon continued.

"Excuse me?"

"More apple crumble, anyone?" Lily's mother asked, trying to defuse the situation before it got much worse.

"Benefits, I'm sure your lot have them too. Or not, do they just claim from our government? That sounds about right for _your_ lot."

"My father is a successful businessman, and my mother is a Ministry official," James said coldly "We have tens of thousands of Galleons in Gringotts bank, and I don't appreciate you accusing us of stealing from your government."

"Galleons? Sounds made up to me," Vernon blustered.

"It's gold," Lily supplied.

"Like hell it is! I don't have to listen to this rubbish, I'm leaving." And with that, Vernon stormed out of the room. Petunia stood and followed, giving Lily an angry look on her way out.

"Lovely dinner, thank you," James said, looking horrified as he remembered the other inhabitants of the room.

"Yes… Help me clear the table please Lily," her mother said in a tone that didn't invite argument.

James mouthed _sorry_ at her as she left, balancing a stack of plates and cutlery.

"I'm so sorry Mum – James is sorry too, I'm sure he didn't mean to… do that," Lily burst out as soon as the kitchen door swung shut behind them. Her mother sighed.

"Oh Lily, I was there. I saw who started that. He seems like a very nice young man, when he's not being insulted by my soon to be son in law."

"Really?"

"Why, is he not usually?" Mrs Evans joked.

"Um."

"He's, ah, not another soon to be son in law, is he?" she asked.

"What? He's not – he's not my boyfriend. Is that what you thought?" Lily spluttered.

"Just asking," her mother shrugged "In that case, he can sleep on the air bed on your floor tonight."

"Where would he be sleeping if we were dating?" Lily asked.

"The shed I suspect, if your father had his way. Now, your sister is getting married tomorrow, to a delightful young man, and we never had this conversation. Right?"

"Right."

Back in the dining room, they found James happily explaining Quidditch to Mr Evans. Petunia had returned and was sulkily flipping through her magazine.

"My bridesmaids get here at eight tomorrow, Mum," Petunia said, standing as they entered the room "I'm going to bed after I do one last check."

"Night love, give us a shout if you need anything," said their father, breaking off his conversation.

"Night."

"So James, what does the, ah, Seeker do?"

* * *

"What _is_ that?" James said, looking unconvinced by the deflated airbed that Lily had laid out on the floor.

"A bed… You'll see, once I find the damned pump," Lily said, digging through the cupboard "Ah ha!"

She got the pump connected to the bed and started inflating it.

"You know you could just use magic for that, right?"

"I guess. I usually forget – I mean, I don't _forget_ about magic exactly, that's kind of hard, but I just automatically… do things the Muggle way, at home," Lily shrugged "Well, except when I show Mum and Dad stuff, or want to piss Petunia off. Anyway, I've only been allowed to use magic at home for one summer."

"Oh yeah, I forgot about that. The Trace is really useless, if you live with other people who're of age you can get away with whatever you want."

"It's so stupid."

"Pretty much… Look, I really am sorry about dinner," James said awkwardly.

"Don't worry about it, really. I don't think Mum and Dad like him all that much either, they're just not allowed to say anything. Mum blames him, anyway, he was such a dick. Although nice to know that you're loaded," Lily teased. James looked embarrassed again.

"Not going to suddenly fall in love with me now that you know, are you?" he joked.

"Don't worry, I think you're safe from that one," Lily laughed "Now, do you want to use the bathroom first?"

"Sure, thanks – where is it?"

"The door at the top of the stairs."

Lily thought she'd been doing a quite spectacularly good job of not freaking out over the fact that she was about to share a room with James – until now, that is. But she was about to sleep in the same room as James Potter. He was going to see her in her pyjamas. He would be sleeping three feet away, while she was sleeping. In the same room.

Her panicked circular thoughts were brought to a sudden stop by the return of James. Specifically, James wearing pyjamas with little Snitches and broomsticks on, that Lily strongly suspected were designed for children (particularly since the trousers stopped halfway up James' calves). She stifled the urge to laugh, because that was probably cruel (and it was also kind of cute).

"In my defence… Okay, I have no defence. I grabbed the first pyjamas I saw. No one must know."

"Sure. Not going to tell anyone about your kids' pyjamas," Lily said, grinning.

"Shut up."

Lily stayed in the bathroom until she was sure she could keep a straight face at the sight of James' pyjamas, getting changed and brushing her teeth. She was grateful that she'd managed to pack an inoffensive pair of plain pyjama trousers and an old t-shirt.

"We should probably get some sleep," she said, both of them standing awkwardly in her room "If Petunia's friends are coming at eight we've got no chance of a lie in."

"If we offer to help out with something we can probably avoid her," James suggested, getting into his bed on the floor.

"Good point." Lily turned off the lights, and carefully edged around James to her own bed.

"Night Lily."

"Night James."

* * *

 **Saturday 15** **th** **April 1978**

As Lily had predicted, they were woken early by the sound of the doorbell, followed by a small stampede of footsteps running up and down the stairs. Or at least, she was woken – James mumbled a little and cuddled closer to his pillow. He'd kicked off half the duvet in the night, and was now curled around it like it was a giant teddy bear. To complete the effect, he was also drooling slightly.

Lily realised she was staring, and looked away hurriedly. Watching people sleep was a level of creepy that she didn't want to descend to, thank you very much. She crept out to the bathroom, then had breakfast, brushed her teeth and showered before going to wake James.

"James?"

No response.

"James?" she tried again, a little louder.

Nothing.

"JAMES!"

"Wha'?" He shot upright, looking around wildly until he spotted Lily standing in the doorway, giggling at the sight of him. His hair was sticking up even more than usual, and he looked different without his glasses.

"If you want a shower go now, before the bridal party take over the bathroom."

"Mhmmm. Thanks." James rubbed his eyes, and hoped with all his heart that Lily hadn't seen the drool on his face.

"Clean towels in the cupboard," she said, and left him to it.

Twenty minutes later a much more conscious and freshly showered James joined her downstairs.

"Morning James," Mr Evans said, looking over the top of his newspaper "There's cereal over there, or toast if you want it."

"Thanks," James took the bowl and spoon Lily offered him, and settled down to eat "Is there anything we can do to help?"

"I shouldn't think so, Petunia's been planning this since she was ten," he said, chuckling to himself "Just some waiting and getting yourself ready."

Nothing to do soon turned into twenty last minute things that had been forgotten or gone wrong. Some discreet magic fixed a broken heel on a bridesmaid's shoe, removed a suspect stain from a white shirt, and tied a perfect bowtie. Muggle manpower made up twenty more favours after a miscount and wrote out a stack of forgotten name cards for the tables. Lily locked herself in her room for an hour to get ready – hair, makeup, dress, colour changing charm on the wrong shoes that she'd managed to pack – and James changed into his suit with ten minutes to spare before they were due to leave. An elegant white car pulled up outside the house to collect the bridal party, while Lily and James and a few of Petunia's friends who hadn't quite made the cut as bridesmaids started walking towards the church just down the road.

Once they arrived they were again enlisted to help, directing guests into the church and double checking all the flower arrangements, sliding into their spot in the front pew with Mrs Evans just before things were supposed to start. Vernon stood at the front with his best man, who Lily had managed to avoid meeting until today, and the vicar. The church fell silent as the music started. Everyone stopped shuffling and turned to face the entrance – everyone except for James, who had barely taken his eyes off Lily since she'd come downstairs in her dress.

Lily fought a sudden urge to cry as Petunia appeared in the doorway, arm in arm with their father. It had been nearly seven years, and she still couldn't get over it. Her childhood best friend, her sister, was walking down the aisle, and if she'd had her way then Lily wouldn't even be here.

A hand touched hers, and stayed there. Lily glanced away from Petunia. Her mother was dabbing at her eyes with a lacy handkerchief, and James was looking at the bride like everyone else, but his hand squeezed hers gently. She shifted her grip, and held on.

* * *

Lily's face ached from smiling through photos. The photographer had taken group photos, family photos, an awkward one of her and Petunia alone – and one of the only ones she wasn't faking a smile through, of her and James. He'd let go of her hand as soon as the ceremony ended, and neither of them had said anything about it. Lily wasn't exactly sure where that left them, but now wasn't really the time.

The photographs were finally done, and they all piled into cars to head to the fancy reception venue that Petunia and Vernon had picked out. Everything was decorated very fashionably, with pink accents to match the bridesmaids' dressed. Lily grabbed a glass of champagne, and wondered how drunk she could get away with being. Probably not as drunk as she needed to be.

"I doubt you'll ever hear me say this again, but alcohol is not the answer," James said, "Stop staring into your glass like that, we should go find our seats for lunch… dinner… what's the afternoon equivalent of brunch?"

"Linner?" Lily tried, following him into the main room "Dunch?"

"… So that's why that isn't a thing then."

They weren't seated at the main table, with the bride and groom and most of the close family members. Vernon's sister was sitting with them, admittedly, but that was only because she'd changed her mind last minute and decided that she could leave her dogs for one day after all.

"I see the family resemblance," James muttered to Lily.

"Be nice!" she whispered back.

Petunia eventually arrived, having changed out of the enormous white meringue dress into something that she could actually move in, hand in hand with her new husband, and the food was finally served. There were several speeches, including an incredibly dull one from Vernon's best man, and one from the maid of honour who awkwardly avoided mentioning Lily in all of her stories from Petunia's childhood. The cake was cut, and they were nearly done with the watching people do things part. Lily wondered if there was any chance of this getting fun now -

"And now, if we could have all the single ladies on the floor please…" the DJ said. Lily swore, but went to join the growing group in the middle of the floor, lurking near the back of the crowd. Petunia stood at the front, back to them, and then launched the bouquet over her shoulder. It sailed over the heads of Petunia's friends and bridesmaids, coming to land with a solid _thwack_ … right on Lily's chest.

It was an impressive throw, Lily had to give her that.

There was a polite round of applause, and several lewd jokes from the girls who had known her in primary school, and Lily escaped as quickly as possible, face flaming as red as her hair.

"Nice catch," James smirked "Got yourself a husband lined up yet?"

"I'll let you know if I find one." Lily dropped the offending bouquet onto their table, and settled down to watch the happy couple's first dance in silence.

The song finished, and her parents joined them for the next, along with several other couples.

"Care to dance?" James stood and held out a hand, grinning.

"Ah…" Lily hesitated.

"Come on, I know you know how after that ball. You can't just sit here and be miserable all night."

"Fine." Lily took the proffered hand and they headed out onto the dancefloor, which was starting to get busy. Petunia and Vernon were swaying somewhere near the middle, but James spun so that she was facing away from them.

"Wait, you can like, properly dance," Lily said in surprise as he led them in a waltz.

"I'm a man of many talents," James winked.

As the evening went on the music got more upbeat, a bemused James watching Lily sing along to all the Muggle songs. She danced with her parents, some old friends, and a few people she hadn't met before, but always came back to James.

The night ended when the guests officially waved Petunia and Vernon off on their honeymoon (technically, the car was taking them to a hotel and they weren't leaving until the morning, but it was close enough). People slowly dispersed, collecting their slices of cake on the way out, and eventually the room was empty of everyone except for James and her parents. All four of them were struggling to stay awake.

"Right, come on you two, the sooner we leave, the sooner we can get to bed," Mr Potter yawned his way through the second half of the sentence.

"That wasn't so bad, right?" James asked as they followed Lily's parents to the car.

"Surprisingly decent. Thanks to you."

"Anytime." James smiled at her.

Lily fell asleep on the ride home, leaning against James' shoulder. She was vaguely aware of being nudged until she was half awake, and gentle hands guiding her up the stairs. She just about managed to pull herself together enough to put pyjamas on, and then she was unconscious again as soon as her head hit the pillow.


	16. April (II)May (I) 1978

**Monday 17** **th** **April 1978**

The first day of the new term was a sudden return to reality for Lily, after the weekend with James. Exams were now only seven weeks away, and their timetable was full of revision classes or finishing off the last bits of the syllabus.

"I'm starting to feel like I can't possibly learn all this in the time we've got left," Jenny said gloomily. The four girls were hanging out in their dormitory after dinner, putting off revision.

"I'm more worried about… Well, things with James," Lily admitted. She'd kept quiet the previous afternoon, busy catching up on everyone else's Easter holidays.

"Excuse me?" "What?!" "Who _are_ you?"

"Is this about that 'adventure' the other week?" Marlene asked.

"… I think you have some explaining to do." Eliza raised an eyebrow expectantly.

"Thanks Marley."

Lily quickly filled them in on the (heavily edited) events of Hogsmeade.

"So he came to the wedding with you? The wedding two days ago? What happened?" Jenny demanded.

"I don't know. I thought, maybe… I don't know!"

"… Could you be a bit more specific?" Eliza asked.

"Well, we went to the wedding," Lily began.

"Yep, got that bit."

"Don't interrupt, Marlene. We went, and he was being so… _nice_. Like, abnormally nice, even for how he's been this year. And he held my hand during the ceremony and we danced together and it felt like, maybe, okay maybe there was a chance that it meant something?" The last bit came out all at once.

"Is this happening? Someone pinch me, I must be dreaming!" Jenny said dramatically.

"So, what's wrong now? This is a good thing, right?" Eliza asked, watching Lily carefully.

"Please tell me you're not being ridiculous again," Marlene said.

"He's acting like nothing happened. Barely even spoke to me today," Lily said miserably.

"Weren't you two talking at lunch?" Eliza frowned.

"Just to schedule a Prefects' meeting."

"What an asshole," Jenny said.

"What is he playing at," Marlene said, "He likes you, anyone with eyes knows it."

"Then why has he been acting like this since yesterday morning." Lily hugged her pillow to her chest, remembering how desperate James had seemed to get away. He'd avoided eye contact with her over breakfast, and they'd separated as soon as they got back to Hogwarts…

"Wait, yesterday morning?" Jenny perked up again "As in, the day _after_ the wedding? You didn't-"

"No, we didn't!" He slept on my floor for a few nights, that's all."

"I'm sorry, a few nights? Of you and James sleeping in the same room?" Eliza said. There were a lot of suggestive eyebrow movements going on.

"Yes! Two nights, okay, and he has stupid children's Quidditch pyjamas that I'm not supposed to tell you about and he's very cute when he's asleep and none of it matters now because he's behaving like I have the – the plague, or something!" Lily was getting dangerously close to tears.

Her bedframe creaked under the weight of three extra bodies as they all piled on around her.

"Why can't things just go right," she whispered.

* * *

 **Saturday 22** **nd** **April 1978**

"Haven't seen much of you around this week," Remus said casually, midway through their usual library study session. He seemed tired, the full moon only a day away, but also slightly concerned.

"Yeah… N.E.W.T.s, you know-" Lily stopped midway through her excuse at the look on Remus' face, which quite clearly spelled 'BULLSHIT' "Fine. What's James told you?"

"Nope, not how this works. Confidentiality and all that."

"What are you, our therapist?" Lily laughed weakly. Remus didn't say anything, just put his quill down and waited. "Okay, the short version, because this homework isn't going to do itself and exams don't stop for my train wreck of a love life."

"Sure."

"I just – I don't know what to do. We went to the wedding, and it was all fine. It was kind of great, actually, but now…" she trailed off, fiddling with her parchment.

"Now?" Remus asked gently.

"He's avoiding me! He's barely spoken a word to me, except to sort out Prefects' stuff – and how the hell am I supposed to do rounds with him this term when he's acting like this – but I thought thing weren't different. And clearly I was wrong."

"You're not wr-"

"And that's fine. It doesn't matter, he's allowed to – to change his mind, but he's not even acting like we're friends now," Lily said, voice breaking on the last sentence.

"Have you tried talking to him about it?" Remus suggested.

"What, and embarrass myself by telling him that I though it meant something? No thanks. We should get back to this essay, anyway," she said quickly, before he could continue the conversation.

Lily opened her textbook and stared at the words, but they blurred together as tears swam in her eyes. This was stupid. James had been friendly, realised what it might look like and panicked, that's all. She shouldn't have assumed…

Movement caught her eye as a hand pushed a block of Honeydukes' best across the table.

"Thanks," she muttered, blinking to clear her vision and taking the chocolate.

* * *

Out on the Quidditch pitch, James was driving the Gryffindor team harder than ever (which was no small feat, given the standards he usually held everyone to). This practice had been going on for over four hours, with only a short, straight to the point series of instruction beforehand rather than James' usual motivational speech.

"Come on!" he shouted, "We've only got four more weeks people, focus!"

He passed to Joanna Sayre, who ducked and dived past Devereaux in defence and moved forwards to score. Marlene caught the Quaffle with the tips of her fingers and flipped it back to James to begin the whole cycle again, but James tucked it under his arm and gave the signal for time out.

"That'll do, everyone. Peeler, work on that move we discussed," James said once they were all back on the ground "We're back to normal practices next week, plus the Saturday before the match, don't forget." And with that, he turned and squelched through the mud towards the changing rooms.

"He's definitely acting weird," Marlene hissed, grabbing Sirius by the elbow and pulling him back to walk next to her.

"I know," Sirius said in a low voice, checking that James was out of earshot "But what are we supposed to do about it? You vetoed locking them in a broom cupboard!"

"I don't know, there must be something we can do – something less drastic, you know that won't work for them."

"We need them to talk to each other. How else can we make them talk?" Sirius asked.

"They have to eventually…"

James was pretending that everything was absolutely fine, and he was doing an excellent job of it, thank you very much. In fact, he _was_ absolutely fine, and he was sure that whatever Sirius and Marlene were whispering about back there had nothing to do with him.

He claimed a shower in the changing rooms without speaking to anyone and stood under the hot water, watching the mud swirl away down the drain, and pushed thoughts of Lily out of his head for the fiftieth time that day.

Everything was fine.

* * *

Dinner was uncharacteristically quiet at their end of the Gryffindor table. Even news of the Quidditch World Cup failed to rouse James, who was mostly just prodding at his food with a fork and failing to notice Lily doing the same thing a few seats down on the opposite side of the table. Sirius and Marlene fell silent after a few minutes of awkwardly trying to drag James into their conversation about the USA team's chances.

Back in the dormitory it was the same; James was as distracted and unenthusiastic as he'd been all week.

"You know what, I said I wasn't going to have this argument again, but fuck it," Sirius burst out "What the hell do you think you're doing?"

"What am _I_ doing?" Remus looked up from his book, bewildered by Sirius' angry one.

"No, not you, him!" Sirius gestured at James.

"I'm not doing anything," James said flatly.

"Yes! That would be my point! Wasn't this literally your plan? Behave yourself until she realises you're not so bad, get married and have twenty children?"

"But she doesn't – she's not interested like that!"

"What do you call that – that entire wedding, to be honest then? You said you were holding hands! And dancing together half the night!"

"Yes! That happened! And you know what else happened? _Her sister's wedding_. She was upset. It didn't mean anything like that, I was there for moral support. I just… got carried away," James said furiously.

"Oh come off it-" Sirius began, but was interrupted by Remus.

"Stop it, both of you! This isn't solving anything. Is that really what you think, James?"

"Yes. And I'm right! I can't take advantage of her being upset to assume things mean more than they do."

"Have you tried speaking to her about this?" Remus held up a hand to forestall Sirius' inevitable interruptions.

"It's best if we pretend it never happened. She was upset, neither of us were exactly sober by the end of the night…"

"How much are you pretending didn't happen exactly, because right now you're not even treating her like a friend," Sirius snapped, ignoring Remus.

"Since when have you been so defensive of her?" James said (defensively).

"Since she became our friend too, you asshat! You owe her a damned apology, and us too while you're at it, you've been a right dick this week."

"I don't have to listen to this shit," James said irritably, grabbing his wand and heading for the door.

"James-" "Where do you think you're going?"

The door slammed behind him.

"You probably shouldn't have shouted at him," Remus observed, sighing.

"Whatever, tell me he didn't deserve that. Friends tell each other when they need to pull their head out of their arse."

Peter poked his head around the door nervously.

"Did I hear shouting?"

* * *

James sat on the closed toilet lid with his head in his hands. Assholes… They didn't know what they were talking about, and weren't they supposed to be _his_ friends?

The worst bit was, he knew they were right. He _was_ being a dick, and he felt terrible about it. But for one day, he'd tricked himself into thinking that maybe, just maybe, this was something he could actually have. And then reality had come crashing in.

Oh, he could have gone along with it. They'd probably have been happy, for now, and then one day Lily would have come up to him and said 'we need to talk' or some variation of it, and she'd tell him how it had all been a mistake, and she should never have let it go on this long, and she was sorry – he was sure she'd be nice about it, but it would be worse than never being with her at all.

James was willing to admit that he had an over active imagination, but that didn't mean he was wrong.

He sat in the boys' bathroom for a while longer, lost in thought, but eventually he got up to leave. He had some apologies to make.

Their dorm was empty, so James made his way down to the common room, hoping that the girls weren't there as well so that he could maybe avoid making a total idiot out of himself in front of everyone, but they weren't in their usual spot there either. It was fairly busy at this time of night, and he scanned the room for the other seventh years, seeing no one – until a flash of red hair caught his eye. Hardest first, then. He took a deep breath, and descended the stairs.

"Hi," he said awkwardly, standing in front of Lily.

"Hi," she said warily "The others went to collect some books, they said they'd be back soon… they've been gone a while though, actually."

"I, um, wanted to talk to you actually." James sat down opposite her.

"Oh. I thought we sorted everything for the Prefects' meeting?" Lily kept her eyes on her books.

"We did, it's not about – look, I'm a dick. I'm sorry. I panicked, but that's not an excuse for being an asshole. It won't happen again, I swear," he said earnestly.

Lily's heart rose and sank seemingly all at once. Clearly, she'd been right. James _had_ realised that she was interested, but at least he was willing to forget about it all.

"It's fine," she said, trying to smile and not quite succeeding "We're friends, right?"

"Yeah. Friends." James mirrored Lily's weak smile. Well, at least when he saw Sirius and Remus he could tell them that he was right. She wasn't really interested in him like that.

As if thinking of them had summoned them, Sirius and Remus climbed through the portrait hole, followed by Peter and Jenny.

"Right, I'll see you later – I've got some homework for Arithmancy that needs finishing," Lily said. She'd nearly finished it, and it wasn't due for another few days, but for once she could do with a bit of space from James.

"You know, I think I left something in the dorm," Sirius said pointedly "I'll just go grab that, shall I?"

"Er, yeah. I'll come help you… look for it?" James got up again. Remus followed them without bothering to make an excuse.

"Did you talk to Lily?" Sirius asked as soon as the door swung closed "Properly?"

"Yeah," James said sheepishly "I apologised. I was right though – she just wants to be friends."

Remus made a disbelieving sound, but James ignored him.

"That's fine then. Anyone up for some Exploding Snap?"

"I shouldn't have been so awful, I'm-" James tried to say sorry, but Sirius cut him off.

"Don't worry about it mate. Water under the bridge, as long as you've fixed things with Lily."

"Exploding Snap it is, then." James caught the pack of cards that Sirius tossed him, and they returned to the others in the common room.

* * *

 **Friday 28** **th** **April 1978**

Things returned to normal. Quidditch practices were less tense, James stopped snapping at people unnecessarily, Lily was less prone to unexplained tears. Neither of them mentioned their feelings for the other where possible, determined to bury them and move on. They'd been proved right (even if they hadn't really wanted to be), they weren't interested, and it was best if they just forgot about the whole thing. They were both so busy avoiding being alone with each other that they didn't even notice that the other was doing the same thing. It would have been hilarious if it wasn't so frustrating, Marlene and Sirius agreed.

The one thing that both of them had forgotten until the Prefects' meeting on Sunday night was that it was their turn to do rounds together this term. Lily had spent the five days between then and now slightly dreading having to spend all evening alone with James.

"You were looking forwards to this three weeks ago," Eliza pointed out as Lily paced around their dormitory.

"That was before I knew for sure that he wasn't interested, wasn't it?"

"Didn't you keep telling us that he wasn't interested before last week, anyway?" Marlene said.

"I- well, yes, I was ninety nine percent sure, but there was the _chance_ that I was wrong…"

"Sure," Marlene snorted.

"Have you done the Potions preparation for next lesson?" Jenny took pity on Lily and changed the subject "It's another mock practical, right?"

"Hmm? Oh, yeah, there's that list of ones they can ask us about." Lily pulled her bag towards her and dug through it.

"I think I've lost mine…"

"I need to get going if I'm not going to be late, I guess," Lily said, somewhat unwillingly "Copy it and stick it back in my bag, will you?" she dropped the parchment in Jenny's lap as she stood to leave.

"Have fun," Marlene said cheerfully. Lily scowled at her.

"Good luck," Eliza added.

She met James in the common room, and they started out along the regular patrol route in silence. Lily racked her brains, trying to remember what they usually talked about.

"So… How's Quidditch going?"

"Are you sure you want me to answer that?" James said, grinning.

"As long as it takes less than ten minutes, sure."

"We're getting closer to being ready for the match, and I guess the Hufflepuff versus Slytherin scores don't really matter too much, I can't see them getting anywhere near challenging Ravenclaw from where they are now, so we're just focusing on the final… But it's going to be a close one, I'm not sure if we'll make it."

"You'll be fine," Lily said with confidence.

"Oh, and you know that how? All your Quidditch knowledge?" James teased.

"I know that because they've got you, and Ravenclaw don't"

"Thanks," James said awkwardly, and Lily cursed herself for saying it. Every conversation they had, it felt like someone accidentally said the exact wrong thing, and she could never guess what it would be.

"So… Quiet night, tonight," she said.

"Yeah. It's not even been half an hour yet, though…"

"Oh. Of course."

More silence as they walked the length of the main fourth floor corridor.

"You feeling okay about N.E.W.T.s?" This time James was the one to try and initiate conversation.

"Some of them… Potions, I can do. Transfiguration, not so much. And Arithmancy is – well, let's not go there," Lily mock shuddered "How about you?"

"The opposite, although I'm glad I didn't take Arithmancy."

"Coming from someone who does Ancient Runes."

They reached the staircase that wound up to the top of the Astronomy Tower and began climbing, Lily following James.

"It's alright – to tell you the truth, half the symbols look like letters anyway, just upside down or sideways. If anyone cared about Astronomy N.E.W.T.s I guess I'd be most worried about that, I don't want to memorise the names of every moderately sized lumps of rock we've ever found, or however many constellations we've invented."

They reached the top of the tower. Unsurprisingly, it was occupied by a couple, clearly hoping to sneak back before their curfew, and making out so passionately that they completely failed to notice the presence of both the Head Girl and the Head Boy.

"Astronomy Tower is out of bounds, kids," James said with forced cheer, very carefully not looking at Lily "That'll be ten points from each of you."

"I like Astronomy," lily said as though their previous conversation hadn't been interrupted. Her eyes were on the sky above them "It's all the same for Muggles, you know. Same names and everything. I learnt a bunch of them when I was ten – I wanted to go to the stars. I thought we'd learn how at Hogwarts, the way Severus talked-"

This was a familiar kind of awkwardness at least, but Lily still regretted the slip. They resumed their rounds, back to silence for a third time.

* * *

 **Tuesday 2** **nd** **May 1978**

Lily, and almost everyone else, had expected revision classes to be easier than learning new things. They were mistaken.

There seemed to be a mock every other day in one subject or another – a surprise practice practical assessment, half a paper in this class, by the way we're doing a full exam paper in tomorrow's double lesson, didn't I tell you last week? And then there was the material – _all_ of the material from the past two years. Teachers regularly mentioned things from the start of sixth year (or, sometimes, from two months ago) that they were supposed to know off by heart and didn't even recognise. Lily had referred five seventh years and three O.W.L. students to Madam Pomfrey for Calming Draughts in the last week alone.

Everyone had their own methods to escape from the stress. James obsessed over Quidditch, Remus read, Sirius dropped Dungbombs on exam-less sixth years. Lily had Potions – three hours a week of things that she absolutely understood.

"Good afternoon, take your seats," Professor Slughorn said at the start of their double lesson "Instructions are on the board, no talking please and try not to use your textbooks, they don't let you have those in exams you know! You can go whenever you're done or after the hour and a half is up."

And with that he disappeared through the door behind his desk into his office, just about visible to the class.

"Don't suppose you fancy giving us a hint, Lily flower?" Sirius asked hopefully.

"Chop one bat spleen, boil in one litre of-"

"Yeah, I can read the instructions, thanks."

"Did you also hear Slughorn say no talking, or is it only your eyes that work so well?" Lily said.

"Teacher's pet." Sirius stuck his tongue out at her.

"Actually passing my Potions N.E.W.T.," Lily returned in kind.

"Stop complaining, you'll all be fine," Peter said miserably. His cauldron was already smoking slightly.

Lily settled into the rhythm of potion making, ignoring the others. Chop, dice, stir, pour… She barely checked the blackboard, working with a single-minded intensity that left no room for worrying about other exams (or James Potter).

James was watching her though, sitting a few desks away with the precise opposite situation – he was so caught up in his own thoughts, he didn't notice when he accidentally added seven drops of essence of comfrey instead of four.

Slughorn hurried into the room at the sound of a small explosion, and winced at the sight of Peter's cauldron.

"Mr Pettigrew, the Hospital Wing I think for those burns. Mr Potter, ah, please add some leech juice before yours goes the same way, and both of you think about what you've done wrong."

"Professor, how much instruction do we get in the actual thing?" someone asked.

"Well, ah, you should know this by now, but a little less than this, I should think, definitely no more."

James didn't see how you could possibly have less detail than this and still be able to call them instructions – it was basically a list of ingredients in order. He turned his attention back to chopping his frog brain.

"Do you think it's possible to just memorise all of the potions that they're allowed to ask us to make?" Sirius said quietly.

"What, all twenty-seven of them?" Remus asked, amused.

"You don't need to memorise them," Lily said. Her potion looked very nearly finished after just over an hour. "They tell you enough to figure out the rest."

"Maybe you can," Sirius said.

"Didn't you get an Exceeds Expectations in your Potions O.W.L.?" James pointed out.

"So?"

"So, you did it then, you can do it now."

"You _are_ doing it now; your potion looks fine." Lily leant over Sirius' cauldron.

Potions was followed by an afternoon off for Lily – or, an afternoon with no timetabled lessons, anyway. She finished off an Astronomy essay for the next morning, and fudged her way through the observations she was supposed to have made before that night's session. Herbology revision, Defence practice, dinner, nap, quick Potions write up, Astronomy lesson at midnight… Each day of revision blurred into the next, liberally speckled with deadlines.

* * *

 **Saturday 6** **th** **May 1978**

This was quite possibly the calmest anyone had ever seen James before a Quidditch match.

"It's a little disconcerting, actually," Marlene observed.

"Well, it's not like either of them can beat Ravenclaw." James shrugged "They're playing for third place and I know it. They know it, even."

"I hope it's an interesting game to watch at least," Sirius said, "Maybe Regulus will have a fall…"

It was one of those surprise summery days where the sun was shining and it was warm enough to go out without a cloak for once. They all squinted through the sunlight to get a good look at the players lining up on the pitch.

Madam Hooch blew her whistle, and they were off. Hufflepuff took an early lead of twenty points, but Slytherin quickly gained on them… and kept gaining.

"Another goal by Slytherin there folks, one ninety to twenty, sorry Hufflepuffs – you're outmatched here," the commentator shouted above the cheering crowds "BUT WHAT'S THIS? MORRIS IS DIVING, DOESN'T HE KNOW THEY'RE LOSING?"

Apparently the Hufflepuff Seeker did not know that they were losing – either that or he didn't care, because he rose again half a second later, Snitch clutched in one hand. Sirius started laughing and didn't stop.

"Oh Merlin," he gasped out "Regulus is going to be _furious_ ," and then he was laughing again.

"FINAL SCORE: SLYTHERIN ONE HUNDRED AND NINETY TO HUFFLEPUFF'S ONE HUNDRED AND SEVENTY, AND I CAN'T BELIEVE I'M SAYING THIS, SLYTHERIN WIN – BUT HUFFLEPUFF CATCH THE SNITCH!"

The Slytherin end of the stands was full of people clapping and cheering – after all, a win was a win – but down on the pitch a small dark-haired figure dressed in green threw down his broom in disgust.

"Excuse me," Sirius said as they left the stands, still chuckling "I've got to go find the Hufflepuff seeker and congratulate him."

"Doesn't this mean that Hufflepuff and Slytherin have both overtaken our score?" Lily asked.

Technically, yes, but we've played one less game than them," James explained "We'll easily make up the difference – if we don't, we've got no hope against Ravenclaw anywhere, and they're the ones in the lead."

"Quidditch is unnecessarily complicated."

"Quidditch is wonderful," James said, grinning.

Unsurprisingly, they didn't get an invite to the Slytherin victory party that night, but they couldn't have gone if they wanted to. The members of the Gryffindor team who were sitting exams had to work twice as hard to fit in revision around near-constant practices, so after the game it was lunch and then back to the library again.

* * *

 **Saturday 20** **th** **May 1978**

For once, James slept until a sensible time on the day of the match. Admittedly, this was probably because he hasn't gone to bed until two AM (despite forcing the rest of the team to have an early night at around half nine). He got out of bed at half eight, showered and dressed in his Quidditch robes. The place where the panic usually was seemed to be empty. This was the last chance for him. They'd done all they could, it either worked or it didn't.

The quiet sense of calm broke a little once they entered the Great Hall, all seven members of the team together. Ravenclaw table jeered at them loudly, shouting insults and bragging, the Gryffindors quickly attempting to drown them out with cheering and counter insults. The tables were as full as James had ever seen them – Lily might have a point, he reflected, people really did care too much about Quidditch. Not that he would ever admit it (much like most Lily-related things).

But there was no time for that today. He hovered around his team as they ate, making sure everyone had plenty of food, and then they headed out to the pitch to warm up.

"Right, it's a bit windy, so watch your steering, it'll be worse up there than it feels down here…" James rattled off advice and small reminders as they jogged two laps, keeping a careful eye on the Ravenclaw team, also warming up but keeping their distance. No one called him out on the fact that these were all things that they already knew.

Eventually people began to filter into the stands, and they broke off their exercises and headed into the changing rooms. Marlene and the Beaters strapped on their protective gear, and they all donned their gloves and made their last-minute preparations. A whistle blew outside to indicate five minutes.

"Right everyone. It's now or never." James paused and swallowed past the lump in his throat. "You're all great, and you've worked harder than anyone could have reasonably asked of you… Whatever the result, I'm proud to be your Captain, okay?"

Several people aww-ed (including Sirius).

"We love you too," Marlene said

"Right. Let's go." James led them out onto the grassy pitch, broomsticks over shoulders, and they lined up opposite the Ravenclaw team in the very centre. James shook hands with the Ravenclaw Captain and stepped back into line.

"Ladies and not-so-gentle-men, welcome to the FINAL Quidditch match of the year. You've watched them play, cheered them through victory and tragic defeat, and now we have Gryffindor and Ravenclaw fighting it out for the Quidditch Cup!" the commentator was saying. The audience in the stands cheered, allegiance nearly equally split for once. James and the other players swung their legs over their brooms, knees slightly bent, ready for take-off.

The world seemed to pause for a second. The crowds held their breath, all eyes focused on Madam Hooch. Two sharp whistles, and they kicked off, silence replaced by the wind rushing in his ears. James circled and then settled into position, nodding to the other Chasers and keeping his eyes on the Ravenclaw players.

Another whistle, and the Quaffle sped into play, thrown up in a perfectly straight line by Madam Hooch, and quickly intercepted by-

"And coming from above that's Sayre with the Quaffle people, Ravenclaw were not expecting that, the youngest Gryffindor Chaser speeding down the pitch there, passes to Devereaux nice block from Summers there but too late, he's passed backwards to Potter, Potter with the Quaffle!"

James tuned out the commentary, executing a tight spin under a Bludger that was quickly caught by Peeler, but seconds later he'd lost the Quaffle to a brief scuffle with a Ravenclaw Chaser.

"Back up towards the Gryffindor end of the pitch, Parrish of Ravenclaw in possession, passes to Summers, Deveraux and Sayre closing in there…"

He headed back to the middle region of the pitch, watching Sirius annoy the hell out of Evie Gardner by flying around her in circles every time she might be looking for the Snitch.

"Summers shoots, nice aim from that distance but McKinnon saves and passes back to Deveraux."

James signalled for the Quaffle and zig-zagged back towards the goalposts, ducking Bludgers and Chasers, passing to Sayre –

"Sayre approaches – she's hesitating-" Joanna glanced back at James and winked, signalling to Devereaux. "Wait, what is she doing – Sayre diving there, Keeper drops to defend, Deveraux in pos – GRYFFINDOR SCORE! Ten nil to Gryffindor, first points of the game twenty minutes in and a clever move from Gryffindor, some promising new talent on their team."

The goals started coming thick and fast from there. They would get ten, twenty points ahead and then Ravenclaw would score again, to James' frustration. They knew exactly what they needed to do to get the cup, and it didn't necessarily mean winning the game. At least Sirius was keeping Gardner well away from the Snitch, he thought, and then rapidly returned his attention to the Quaffle as Joanna launched it at him.

"Fifty forty to Gryffindor, maintaining a narrow lead there," the commentator was shouting.

James dived suddenly as a Bludger flew at him, regaining height quickly and passing to Devereaux.

"Gryffindor score again!"

Always twenty points up when they needed forty. He started to wonder if Ravenclaw were toying with them, and then had to remind himself that they weren't _that_ good.

* * *

One and a half hours in, and the game remained essentially unchanged. They were twenty points ahead, the Ravenclaw Seeker wasn't getting a chance to sight the Snitch (and she was starting to get frustrated with Sirius' constant blocking tactics), and they just _couldn't_ score those two more goals without Ravenclaw getting one in as well.

"Williams entering the Gryffindor goal area there, straight shot, only McKinnon between him and another Ravenclaw – ooooh, that's got to hurt."

One of Owley's Bludgers had hit the Chaser square in the back, causing him to drop the Quaffle. Marlene dived and caught it, passing back up the pitch.

"McKinnon to Deveraux to Potter to Sayre, that girl has some fantastic manoeuvres, I'm free tonight if you are – sorry, Professor – she shoots, and she scores! Gryffindor one hundred to Ravenclaw's seventy."

James' heart leapt a little. If they could just score one more goal before Ravenclaw did…

He took off in hot pursuit of the Ravenclaw Chaser currently in possession, waving to the others as he went. No way were they scoring with that. A moment later, he and Devereaux were flying either side of the Ravenclaw, but they passed it to another Chaser that he hadn't spotted coming up behind them. James swore and they changed targets, but it was too late – a Bludger zoomed past him.

Madam Hooch's whistle blew.

"And that's a foul from the Ravenclaws, the referee is calling for a penalty to Gryffindor!"

James had no idea what foul been committed or by who, but he wasn't about to question things.

"Sayre takes the shot, she can't fool the Keeper twice – but she can aim, Gryffindor scores, one hundred and ten to seventy!"

This was their chance! James scanned the air for Sirius, who had broken away from the Ravenclaw Seeker to look for the Snitch, keeping one eye on the opposing Chasers, preparing to intercept the Quaffle as it came towards the shaky line formed by him and Devereaux –

WHAM!

But not watching their Beaters carefully enough. He swore loudly and doubled over his broom, clinging to it with one hand, right fist clenched against the pain in his arm.

"Devereaux in possession there, heading for the scoring area, caught by Williams though and no-one to pass to, Ravenclaw with the Quaffle."

There was a confused few moments for James as he carefully stretched out his arm, wincing at the pain. Bruised, but not broken, he thought, and flew on, but slightly too late.

"Ravenclaw score! Only a thirty-point gap again now, this is the closest final Hogwarts has seen in several years."

Sirius signalled to let him know that he'd seen the Snitch. Evie ducked and dodged, desperately trying to get Sirius out of her way.

James had an idea. It was possibly a terrible idea, but that wouldn't stop him from trying it. He waved a hand to indicate that he wanted the Quaffle.

"Sayre passes to Potter, Potter in possession."

James headed straight for the goals without pause. Twenty feet to the scoring zone… ten feet…

The three Ravenclaw Chasers rose up in front of him. If he went to dive, Parrish followed, and if he tried to fly up he would find Summers blocking his path. He settled back on his broom, keeping a safe distance. He wouldn't let them intimidate him into passing…

"Peeler and Owley beautifully in sync there, some smooth and professional Beating from the Gryffindor team."

This clearly struck the Ravenclaw directly in front of James as an odd thing to be commenting on at this time, because a look of confusion briefly crossed her face, seconds before a Bludger hit her. A second Bludger flew almost in unison at Summers next to her, who ducked but still lost his balance, and James took his chance, leaning low over the broom with the Quaffle tucked under his arm. He shot forwards, barrelling past the recovering Chasers, only the Keeper standing in his way, looking determined and covering the hoops solidly. This was not a Keeper who would be easily fooled again. James grinned at them. There was only one obvious choice, really, even if it was something they hadn't exactly practiced. He really hoped Sirius still knew where the Snitch was, or this would be a disaster, but there was no time to check.

The Keeper's expression of grim determination faded as James kept coming closer, still not making his shot, and he flew forwards to meet him. Truly textbook Keeping.

James watched the distance to the hoops… carefully adjusted his balance under his robes, moving one foot up to rest on the shaft of his broomstick.

Three.

Two.

One.

He launched himself from the broom, throwing the Quaffle over the shocked Keeper's head, and straight through the hoop.

"HOLY SHIT!" The commentators voice was amplified throughout the stands as the entire audience drew in a shocked breath as one. James ignored everything except for the broomstick he'd managed to grab with one hand as he fell, drawing the attention of both spectators and players – except for two. The Ravenclaw Seeker shouted as Sirius sped towards a Snitch that was just too far away for her to catch, just as James managed to pull himself back onto his broom.

"POTTER IS ALIVE! GRYFFINDOR WIN THE QUIDDITCH CUP! THIS IS TOO MUCH FOR ME, I QUIT!" the commentator was shouting at the top of his lungs, still nearly drowned out by the mass of noise from the Gryffindor section of the stands. Everyone was standing, shouting and screaming and stamping their feet, waving banners and flags and scarves in the air as they vaulted the barrier onto the pitch where the Gryffindor team were descending onto one another, crying and shouting and incoherently congratulating one another. Professor McGonagall could be seen to be behaving as excitably as any of the teenagers, not that she'd admit it afterwards, and accepting five galleons from Professor Flitwick.

"GRYFFINDOR! GRYFFINDOR! GRYFFINDOR!" the noise of the crowds coalesced into chanting as the red and gold flood reached their team. Sirius was hoisted onto someone's shoulders, but before James could join them a red-haired blur hurtled towards him and threw her arms around him.

"You – IDIOT – James – Potter!" The words were muffled as Lily spoke into his shoulder, and then immediately released him, only to grab him again and hold him at arm's length, looking him up and down for injuries. "What the hell is wrong with you? Don't you have any self-preservation? Launching yourself off a broomstick thirty feet in the air, honestly, this sport!"

"But we won!" he said, "We WON!"

The crowds lifted him up along with Sirius, separating him from Lily, who rolled her eyes in amusement. Professor Dumbledore approached them with the giant silver Quidditch trophy, which he presented to them right there on the pitch.

"Congratulations to Gryffindor on their two hundred and seventy to eighty points victory, winning them the cup!"

Sirius and James hoisted the cup into the air between them. James couldn't stop grinning like an idiot, clutching the trophy with his good arm.

Eventually the enthusiasm of the crowd started to translate itself into party mode, and Sirius and James were set down as everyone started to move towards the castle. They handed the cup to Professor McGonagall, who looked like she never wanted to let it go, and went to shake hands with the dejected looking Ravenclaw team.

"Congrats," their Captain said, looking surprisingly cheerful.

"You too, you played well," James said.

"Eh, we wouldn't have stood a chance if you hadn't broken your leg. You would have smashed Hufflepuff."

"Thanks."

"Anyway," they continued "You graduate at the end of this year, so next year is all ours."

"Well, best of luck with that, but I think I'll be leaving the team in capable hands," James laughed.

* * *

James had to go see Madam Pomfrey before he was allowed to return to Gryffindor Tower. She healed up the bruising developing on his arm in seconds, and then took another five minutes to complain about the dangers of Quidditch. By the time he made it to the common room the party was already in full swing, although they erupted into cheers again when he entered.

"You're a Quidditch hero mate!" Sirius said happily, thrusting a bottle of Butterbeer into his hand "No one's ever seen anything like it! Our final match will go down in history."

Remus was next to congratulate him, and then Marlene, and then James had to find the rest of his team and tell them again how wonderful they are… Even Lily was joining in with the party. Homework and O.W.L.s and N.E.W.T.s were completely forgotten by everyone in the room. The music was loud, the food and drink plentiful (and after the younger ones had started to head up to bed Sirius broke out the Firewhiskey and vodka), and the party was set to carry on late into the night.

"Ah come on Lils, you must have been at least a little bit impressed," a tipsy James was saying.

"If I admit to it will you promise to never do it again?" Lily asked, amused.

"… Maybe?"

"Nah, not that cool really."

"Fine, never again!"

"It was very impressive. And stupid, did I mention stupid yet?"

"Pfft. We won!"

The others stood a few meters away, watching this exchange.

"Okay, hands up, who else was hoping we'd win, they'd kiss and this would all be sorted?" Sirius asked, thrusting his own arm into the air.

"Concerned shouting is… kind of like kissing?" Eliza said, tilting her head to one side as she observed the pair.

"We need to do something before we all drop dead of frustration." Marlene turned to Sirius expectantly.

"Don't you have a boyfriend for that?"

"Gross, Black."

"I stand by my broom cupboard plan."

"And I still say that won't work."

"Yeah, no," Jenny said, "They'll just avoid the topic completely still."

"The problem is that they both think that they have proof that the other person isn't interested," Remus said thoughtfully.

"Does this mean you'll help?" Sirius said excitedly "Moony, I never thought I'd see this day!"

"Why can't we just set them up on a date?" Peter asked, "There's a Hogsmeade weekend soon, right?"

"That… That might actually just work," Sirius said.

"No need to sound so surprised," Peter muttered.

"We just need to get them both there and aware that it's a date – you're definitely helping now Moony, there's no way we'll get Lily on this without you."

"Oi, what about us!" Eliza said indignantly.

"We need a plan," Sirius said, ignoring her.

"This never ends well," Remus sighed.


	17. May (II)June (I) 1978

**Monday 22** **nd** **May 1978**

Classes were over for the term. Once they'd recovered from the excitement of the Quidditch match, they all had to face the fact that there was nothing between them and N.E.W.T. exams now. For Lily and Remus, of course, this meant the library.

"Have you seen my Charms textbook?" Lily lifted up the rolls of parchment and stacks of books that flooded their table as she searched.

"Oh, it's here, sorry," Remus passed the book across the table "Why are you so certain that James isn't interested, anyway?" he asked casually, without looking up from his Defence Against the Dar Arts notes.

"Wow, that was a completely normal thing to suddenly say and not at all suspicious," Lily said sarcastically "Why, are you going to tell me I'm wrong again?"

"No… I won't tell you," Remus said slowly "But I might be able to prove it."

"Bullshit," Lily snorted.

"You could at least give me a chance."

"What if I'm not interested anymore?"

It was Remus' turn to look disbelieving now.

"Well I could have gotten over it!" she said.

"Have you?"

Lily made a rude hand gesture.

"Well?"

"Fine, no, I still like him, and it won't fucking go away, but it's not like admitting that is going to help anyone!"

"But what if it did?"

"Why won't you just let this go?"

"Tell me exactly why you think James isn't interested."

"We've been over this already!" Lily opened her textbook, resolutely staring down at the page, a clear signal that the conversation was over, but Remus ignored her.

"We're going over it again."

"He said he panicked. Clearly, he realised I liked him, and doesn't feel the same way, but it's fine! I'm moving past it!"

"That's a lot of assumptions there," Remus said mildly.

"It's not – it's the only thing that makes any sense!"

"Or maybe James is an oblivious and panicked because he thought _you_ realised that he likes you."

"No."

"Oh come on Lily, give us one chance. Just one."

"Us? I knew there was a plot in here somewhere. Let me guess, Sirius? Marlene?" She looked distinctly unimpressed.

"That's not a no."

"Fine. Fine! You've got one chance, but so help you all when it blows up in your face."

"It won't," Remus said, more confidently than he felt "Don't make any plans for Saturday."

"Saturday – N.E.W.T.s start in two weeks!"

"You said one chance, no going back now," he said hurriedly.

"We'd better get back to work then. And no more secret plots please, you're terrible at it." Lily shook her head. Remus nodded in agreement – his part was done now, anyway.

* * *

"Has anyone done last year's Potions paper?" Peter asked. He was lying on his bed, frowning at a sheet of parchment.

"Nope," Sirius said, "You're dripping ink on your bed."

Peter swore and scrubbed at the stain with his sleeve. " _Tergeo_!"

"Well, it looks a bit smaller at least" James said.

"Anyway, Hogsmeade this weekend," Sirius said happily, "One whole day of freedom from revision!"

"Yeah…" James said distractedly, searching for a clean pair of socks.

"What are you two doing?" Peter asked.

"I think I'm probably doing something with Remus."

"I need new quills, I've broken most of mine," James said.

"It's all this actually having to do work business," Sirius said, "But you know who likes quills?"

James looked at him as though he'd grown a second head.

"Lily! You should ask her, er, quill shopping with you!"

"What's he trying to do, Wormy?" James looked straight at Peter, ignoring Sirius completely.

"Uh – nothing!"

"Right. And I'm Merlin."

"Okay, so we might-" Sirius began.

"We? This was your idea!" Peter squeaked.

"Technically it was yours Pete, but I'm willing to take the credit. I might have had a truly brilliant idea to help you with your quest to win Lily's heart."

"There is no 'quest', Sirius," James said flatly "It's over, remember?"

"Well, is it? It seems a shame to give up after your plan was working so well…"

"Yes, it worked. We're friends now. But she made it clear that that's all she wants to be, so here we are."

"Did she really make it _clear_ , though…"

Remus returned to the dormitory as Sirius was saying this, dropping his bag onto his bed.

"Get to the point, Sirius," James said, pulling on some clean(ish) socks that he'd found under his bed.

"So impatient," Sirius shook his head "Anyway, technically I already did. Hogsmeade. You. Lily. Not the rest of us."

"So, a date."

"A genius plan, you have to admit."

"Are you in on this too, Moony? You wouldn't, would you?" James turned to look at Remus hopefully.

"When does Sirius give people a choice in things?"

"Yes, I'm sure you took a lot of persuading," he said, deadpan.

"Just give it a shot mate. One date, it'll be great!" Sirius said enthusiastically.

"Stop rhyming and I'll think about it."

"That's a yes? You won't regret it!"

"Right. I'm going to dinner."

Remus waited for the sound of James' footsteps to recede down the stairs.

"Well, at least we're both terrible at being subtle."

"Shit, did you give the game away to Lily as well?"

"Yeah… still, maybe it's better this way. If they both know it's a date then they can't try and pass it off as anything else."

"True, true. This is why you're the smart one." Sirius kissed Remus on the end of his nose. "We're going to have a very nice date while they're getting their shit together, okay?"

Peter made a gagging sound.

"Still here, guys."

* * *

 **Saturday 27** **th** **May 1978**

The final Hogsmeade weekend of the year dawned bright, sunny and awkward. Lily woke up much earlier than she would admit to the others, pacing around the common room in an attempt to calm her nerves until it was time to go and get ready.

"Lily, you realise you're basically wearing your uniform?" Eliza said patiently.

"What do you mean, it's my nice skirt and a white – oh. Damn it. Why are none of my nice things clean?!"

"Ditch the tights too, it'll be boiling," Jenny advised.

"This is definitely the most nervous I've ever seen you before a date," Marlene said as Lily pulled off her tights.

"It's not a-" Lily began automatically, but it was. Technically. Who knew how Remus (or more likely, Sirius) had talked James into this.

"It'll be fine," Jenny said soothingly "But you do only have fifteen minutes."

"Shit. Right. First thing I grab…"

They all stared at the neon knitted cardigan that Lily occasionally wore around the dorm when it was cold.

"Second thing."

* * *

James shuffled his feet nervously, fiddling with his collar and checking his watch every thirty seconds. He was early, which was a rare occurrence, and alone, so there was no one to take his mind off the upcoming date. Not that Lily probably wanted to go, she was just humouring Remus, but still. It was a chance. Should he have brought flowers? He should have brought flowers. Although, given the many previous occasions where he'd tried to give her flowers… well, maybe it was for the best. Lily could be quite creative with Transfiguration, for someone who claimed to not be very good at it.

Someone came down the stairs into the Entrance Hall and James' head snapped up as he caught the movement out of the corner of his eye, but it wasn't her. He breathed a sigh of relief that she hadn't seen him react – he needed to relax, act cool –

"Hi," Lily said, and James jumped out of his skin. He'd been so caught up in his internal panicking that he hadn't noticed her arrive.

"Hey, hi. Are you ready to go?"

Lily was having a hundred second thoughts, but she nodded anyway, and they began the long walk down to Hogsmeade.

"So, what have you been up to, other than being talked into things?" Lily asked.

"Work, supposedly. Probably not as much as you though – are you aiming to be top of every class again?" James teased.

"I wasn't top of every class!" she protested.

"No, true, there were the ones Remus was top in and you were only second…"

They continued talking all the way there, without really saying anything important. It felt just like doing their Prefects' rounds.

"Where should we go?" Lily asked as they neared the village, interrupting their conversation with the reminder that this was in fact a date.

"Well, Sirius did suggest quill shopping… but I'm pretty sure he was joking. Unless you want to, I mean?"

"We could just walk around a bit?"

"Sure."

They wandered through the rows of picturesque shops, less busy than they usually were, with most fifth and seventh years busy revising.

"It looks so different at night," Lily commented.

"Well, you see, there's this thing called the sun…" James said with a straight face.

"Piss off!" Lily laughed, swatting at his arm. Wait, did that count as flirting? She couldn't stop overthinking things. "I mean, the colours and everything are wrong at night. And the quiet… Oh you know what I mean."

"And you can't buy Dungbombs. Not that I'd be doing that today, I mean…"

"Does that mean we can't actually go to Scrivenshafts?"

"I'd never try to get between you and your quills," James said.

"Smart."

They did go into Scrivenshafts (James broke a lot of quills during exam season), Tomes and Scrolls (trying very hard not to think about the revision waiting for them at home), Honeydukes (where James insisted on buying Lily chocolate), and the Post Office, where hundreds of owls hooted at them.

"What I want to know," James asked "Is why our Owlery can't be inside like this? Would have saved me a lot of trouble this year."

"You still won the Cup," Lily reminded him.

"We did, didn't we?" he said happily "We should probably get lunch, I'm pretty hungry…"

Lily eyed the nearby Madam Puddifoot's suspiciously.

"The Three Broomsticks?" she suggested, before James could say anything.

"Sounds good."

The pub was busy, as usual, but they managed to find a table for two tucked into a corner. Their knees brushed every time they moved so much as an inch, but after a while Lily managed to stop noticing quite so much (or at least, she pretended she wasn't noticing). They ordered food and Butterbeer, eating as they talked, back on the unavoidable topic of school.

"Seriously, Potions is the worst and you are absolutely nuts," James said, shaking his head.

"You do Ancient Runes! You cannot be sitting their and insulting Potions right now!"

"… Fair point. We should get going and actually do some of that revision, I guess."

Lily looked down at their empty plates and glasses.

"Yeah, let's head back."

The walk back was about the same. Lily hadn't expected a date with James to feel like… well, not a date. Every time she'd relaxed a bit she'd forgotten it was supposed to be one, to be honest.

They finally made it back to Gryffindor Tower and hovered outside awkwardly for a second.

"That was… nice," she said.

"Yeah. Nice," James agreed.

"I should go and get my books before I go to the library."

"Right. See you later, then." James turned and gave the password.

"See you," Lily said as she headed for the stairs to the dorms, where she found Marlene, Jenny and Elizabeth.

"You're back early," Eliza said, looking up from her Care of Magical Creatures textbook "How was it?"

"Yes, that, how was your date?" Marlene asked, sitting upright.

"It was fine," Lily shrugged.

"Fine how? You went on a date with _James Potter_ , Lily, you cannot hold out on us right now," Jenny demanded "We've been waiting for this day for years!"

"Fine as in, two people who are friends were talked into going on a date together and both forgot it was a date by the end because it was all very nice and normal and perfectly platonic because he. Is. Not. Interested."

The last bit was said with rather more force than usual.

"Anyway, I'm going to the library," Lily continued more quietly. She grabbed her bag and left as quickly as she'd arrived.

"… Did they literally just manage to fuck up being set up on a date?" Marlene asked.

"I don't know… Maybe it really isn't meant to be," Eliza suggested. Marlene and Jenny gave her shocked looks.

"Not meant to be?" Jenny said "Clearly the stress of exams is getting to you… They like each other! A lot!"

"That doesn't always mean that things work out," Eliza said.

"They're both just too damn stubborn," Marlene sighed, ignoring them.

"Well, either way, trying to do anything else right now will probably end up making things worse… N.E.W.T.s are only a few weeks away," Eliza pointed out.

* * *

Remus was smart enough not to say anything more than 'hello' when he saw the look on Lily's face. She acknowledged him briefly, and then dived into the textbooks she'd stacked on the table in front of her, forming a wall that he could just about see over. After forty minutes of silence though, curiosity won out.

"How did it go?"

"About as you'd expect, for hanging out with a platonic friend."

"Are you sure? He-"

"Very sure. I gave him – and you – one more chance, and I'm glad, because now I'm one hundred percent sure, and we can just be friends. No 'what if's." Lily wiped the corners of her eyes, hoping Remus couldn't tell from the other side of the books.

"I thought you were already one hundred percent sure?"

"Don't be a smartass."

"Fine. I'd like to be one hundred percent sure that I'm going to pass Arithmancy…" he changed the subject, and Lily gratefully took the opening.

"You'll be top of the class again, _you've_ got nothing to worry about. Transfiguration is killing me."

* * *

"Well, that was a disaster." Sirius, Remus, and Peter were sitting around in their dorm, pretending to do work (except for Peter, who wasn't pretending).

"Agreed," Sirius said "So what's our next move?"

"Passing N.E.W.T.s?" Peter muttered.

"Nothing," Remus said firmly.

"But-"

"No. We said one chance, they gave it one chance, we have to let them sort it out themselves."

"It's never going to happen that way!" Sirius threw his arms in the air dramatically.

"Then maybe it's not supposed to."

"Does anyone know the answer to this question?" Peter interjected, staring down at his work determinedly.

"Of course it's supposed to! They're ridiculous – right, Pete?" Sirius ignored Peter completely.

"I don't know, Padfoot…" Peter said awkwardly "He might have a point there. And N.E.W.T.s…"

"N.E.W.T.s are ages away." Sirius snorted.

"A week, Sirius!" Remus shook his head.

"We all talk like these exams mean something, but let's face it, with the way things are out there right now… Do you think it's going to matter how many Outstandings we have when we're fighting? We all read the Prophet, we know what's happening out there." Sirius gestured at the window, suddenly serious.

Remus stilled, and Peter looked up from his books.

"We can't do anything about that until we're out of here. So for now, exams matter," Remus said.

"When we win, N.E.W.T.s will matter," Peter added.

The words 'if we win' hung unsaid in the air.

"I'll help you with the question Pete, what subject?" Remus offered quietly.

"I'm going to go and find James," Sirius pulled himself to his feet and headed for the door "See you at dinner."

* * *

 **Saturday 3** **rd** **June 1978**

Despite the fact that it was before eight in the morning on a weekend, the Great Hall was full of fifth and seventh years having breakfast in preparation for a long day in the library.

"Best counter-jinx for the Jelly Legs Jinx?" A bored looking Sirius was quizzing Marlene, Lily and Remus using a pile of Defence Against the Dark Arts flashcards.

"Shield charm," Lily said, a split second after Remus, "Come on, that's not a real question."

"I have excellent news!" James interrupted loudly, skidding to a halt next to their spot at the Gryffindor table.

"How can you possibly have any good news right now?" Marlene asked, grabbing the flashcards from Sirius.

"Dad got tickets!" The flashcards were promptly dropped in an excited outburst from Marlene and Sirius, but the others were still confused.

"Tickets to what?" Eliza asked, raising her voice over Marlene and Sirius' chanting.

"The Quidditch World Cup, of course! In August? He says he's managed to get hold of loads – you guys with all come, right?"

Marlene shouted 'YES' enthusiastically, drawing attention from the other tables, and even Remus, Jenny and Eliza agreed.

"What do you say, Lily?" James grinned at her

She shouldn't go. It would only be encouraging the feelings she was trying to get rid of. Hell, even that wide smile directed at her was giving her a fluttery feeling in her stomach. You hate Quidditch anyway, she told herself.

"I mean, you don't have to, obviously…" he was saying, smile fading.

"Alright," she said, trying to sound nonchalant.

"Really?" he looked hopeful.

"Yes, fine."

"Yes! See, now we have a proper reunion planned post Hogwarts." James was beaming again.

"I thought we already had Remus and Sirius' wedding?" Lily teased.

"Hey! Who says you'd be invited to that?" Sirius said indignantly.

"Where is the Cup this year, anyway?" Jenny asked.

"France are hosting," James said "Not that it really matters, it'll just be in some fields in the middle of nowhere. We'll have to get a Portkey down there, I expect."

"Anyway," Remus cut in before the morning could be lost to Quidditch "We should get doing, exams in two days…"

There was a collective groan from the group, and they unwillingly headed to the library, bags bulging with notes and textbooks. They sprawled out over several tables, Madam Pince giving them a deeply suspicious look as they passed, as though groups of more than two or three people shouldn't be permitted in the library.

As always, there were a range of responses to the impending exams, so maybe she had a point. Some of them – namely Sirius and James – were happily confident, half-heartedly flicking through their notes.

"There's no way any of that is going in," Lily said in disbelief as she watched Sirius skim reading. He shrugged.

"Does it really matter? If I don't know it now, I'm not going to."

"Shit, don't say that… Peter said desperately. He appeared to be trying to cram at least three things at once, changing subject every five seconds as panic threatened to overwhelm him.

"There's still time," Lily said "Every little helps."

"Yeah, everything you read might be the thing that comes up," Remus added. He and Lily, always the organised ones, were questioning each other on their weak points, perfectly on top of their revision schedules (more or less…).

"You should come practice with us, Pete," Jenny offered. She was sharing a stack of notes with Eliza, getting distracted more often than not. Marlene had left to work alone, saying she couldn't concentrate with all the chatter.

"I'm going to fail anyway," he said, giving up on the Charms textbook he'd been holding.

"You'll be fine, come on. It's Transfiguration first, then Herbology, so let's just focus on those."

Revision (or, pretending to revise) continued until late evening, with the Marauders taking it in turns to sneak food into the library, but eventually they all crawled into bed for an early night, ready to repeat the whole thing again the next day.


	18. June (II) 1978

**Monday 5** **th** **June 1978**

"Good morning," Professor McGonagall's voice came from the front of the line of seventh years waiting outside the Great Hall, silencing the nervous chatter, "This morning's exam is the N.E.W.T. Transfiguration theory paper, for any of you that have failed to read your timetables. Once you enter the hall, there will be no speaking. You may not take any belongings into the room. Please check your seat number before you enter. Good luck."

The doors swung open, and they shuffled through them. As usual, the four house tables had vanished, to be replaced by row upon row of individual desks. Each desk had a fat roll of parchment, a pot of ink, several quills, and the dreaded exam paper laid out on it. Lily exchanged one last look with the others before finding her seat, and the elderly examiner at the front of the room began speaking.

"This is the Nastily Exhausting Wizarding Test written paper in Transfiguration," he spoke incredibly slowly, peering down at them all from the teachers' dais "Nineteen-seventy eight. You may not talk or communicate in any manner. Quills and parchment are enchanted with anti-cheating charm. The exam duration is three hours…" There was a long pause, everyone's eyes watching the clock "You may begin now."

Lily took a deep breath, flipped over her paper, and sunk into exam mode. The clock ticked, parchment rustled, and quills scratched, but Lily was oblivious to everything but the questions in front of her.

" _7\. What are the three principles of human transfiguration? Describe their applications with an example. Include incantations."_

She wrote, and then wrote some more, as she tried to get everything she could remember about Transfiguration onto the page somehow. Inches of filled parchment turned into feet, and by the time the examiner called an end to it and summoned all their answers she thought she'd answered most of the questions satisfactorily.

"I think I got question nine wrong… and two…" Peter said anxiously as they left the Hall, heading up to the dormitory to get in one last session before their afternoon practical exam.

"I wrote seven inches for three, do you think that was enough? It asked for a short essay…" Eliza asked, twisting her exam paper into a ball.

"I only wrote four…"

"Alright no more of this shit," Sirius declared loudly "If you lot dissect every single question on every single damn paper this week I will strangle someone."

"Yes, that," Marlene said irritably.

"We can only worry about the papers we haven't done yet," Jenny said in an attempt at diffusing the tension.

"You mean all but one?" James pointed out.

"One step at a time." Lily ducked through the portrait hole "We've got fifteen minutes before lunch, I'm going to grab my incantations flashcards."

Lunch passed quickly (the hall miraculously returned to its usual state for a few hours), and the seventh years remained outside the doors as the meal ended and everyone else filtered out. The queue slowly shrank as examiners called them in one by one. Lily was grateful that 'Evans' gave her a short wait.

"Good, good," her examiner said approvingly, smiling encouragingly "And one last spell, if you could reverse the following please." She flicked her wand, casting non-verbally, and the resigned looking assistant examiner became an equally resigned looking badger.

* * *

"Do you think I'll lose points because my examiner still had black and white striped hair at the end?" Lily asked, causing Sirius to howl with laughter.

"Mine only got half human, I wouldn't worry," Jenny said cheerfully.

"Why do they always have to ask us to demonstrate Untransfiguration?" Marlene complained "Literally no one can do it right."

"Speak for yourself McKinnon," Sirius smirked "I think that's my Outstanding in the bag."

"So modest," Remus shook his head.

"I turned the assistant into most of a Badger," Peter said sadly.

"… _Into_ a badger?" Sirius asked incredulously.

"Most of something is alright, I reckon," James said cheerfully "As long as it was easily reversible."

Peter didn't say anything.

"Well, that one's over at least. Herbology tomorrow," Remus said.

"Not for me!" Sirius crowed "Whole day off."

"Screw you." Marlene threw some balled-up parchment at him.

"Herbology practicals are usually okay anyway," Eliza said, "How many things can they ask us to do to a plant?"

* * *

 **Saturday 10** **th** **June 1978**

Lily had back to back exams from Monday until Friday afternoon, when she finally got her first free block. Tuesday had been a tricky Herbology theory paper followed by a three-hour practical that had left them sweating and covered in dirt, which made Wednesday's Charms exams feel tame by comparison. She pulled off all the non-verbal spells and left to go cram for Thursday – Care of Magical Creatures was another hands-on subject. As no co-operation was required, they weren't supposed to talk, but they all struggled to supress their laughter when Sirius ended up with dung in his hair.

Friday morning's exam was noticeably quieter than the others had been – Arithmancy was extremely unpopular. Lily and Remus worked through pages long calculations while everyone else enjoyed a lie in, and then it was back to revision that afternoon while Marlene, Elizabeth and Peter sat their Muggle Studies paper.

The scene was nearly exactly the same as it had been a week ago. They took over the same section of the library, textbooks on hand – except now the sun was shining in through the window, and younger years who'd already finished their exams could be seen relaxing in the grounds.

"I am seriously regretting taking Ancient Runes right now," James groaned. He had draped himself over the chair next to Lily in an uncomfortable looking posture, hair brushing her arm where his head was tipped back. She resisted the urge to push his glasses back up his nose as he stared at the notes he was holding above his face. Remus was similarly occupied on the other side of the table, although he was sitting normally. Sirius was absent, claiming that "no one needs to revise for History of Magic, I'll just make it all up", but everyone else was in the library with them.

"Are exams over yet?" Eliza asked miserably, doodling in the margins of her Potions notes.

"We need a break," Remus announced, suddenly standing and snapping his book shut.

"A break? What's one of those?" James muttered.

"It _is_ nearly lunchtime," Jenny said, looking out of the window wistfully.

"Revision breaks are good for you," Lily agreed, stretching and wincing. They'd been sitting her for far too long.

"I'll go get Sirius, meet you all under the usual tree," Remus said. There was a sudden burst of activity as everyone moved, leaving their stuff as it was.

"Fresh air!" Marlene exclaimed as they stepped through the main doors, squinting against the sun. They walked across the grass at a leisurely pace, and they'd only been settled in the shade for a few minutes when Sirius and Remus caught up with them.

"Here, catch." Sirius dug around in the bags they'd brought and tossed a sandwich at James, who caught it effortlessly. Remus passed one to Lily more sedately, and a jug of pumpkin juice was produced. They handed it around and took turns drinking from it ("It was your job to remember glasses!" "Was not!" "Go flirt somewhere else." This last was Marlene, lying on her back in the sun with her eyes shut).

"Anyone else almost not want these exams to end?" Lily asked.

"… That's it. She's finally cracked," Sirius said, staring at Lily in horror.

"I mean, after this, Hogwarts is over."

Everyone was quiet for a moment before Lily continued.

"We'll all have to go off and get jobs or well, stuff after this… No more of this."

"Does anyone even know what they want to do?" Jenny asked.

"It's not exactly safe out there for some of us," Remus said quietly.

"I'm going to fight." Sirius said seriously. There was a shocked silence from everyone but the Marauders.

"I'm guessing this means all of you?" Marlene recovered first. James nodded.

"And me."

"What the fuck Lily."

"I am literally one of the people they're targeting. There's no use pretending it's not true."

Eliza leaned into Lily on one side. On the other, James touched her arm briefly.

"It's so easy to forget this shit here," Jenny sighed "The sun is shining, the sky is blue… it doesn't feel real."

"I stopped reading the news months ago," Eliza admitted "It gave me nightmares."

"Speaking of other nightmare inducing things… I think our break is over." Sirius' seriousness had passed as quickly as it had come. Lily punched him in the arm gently but let him give her a hand up. They all traipsed back to the library, dragging their feet and complaining.

* * *

 **Friday 16** **th** **June 1978**

The final exam seemed to take forever to arrive. Time alternately slipped away whenever you weren't looking and dragged like every minute was an hour. Remus, Sirius and Jenny regretted taking History of Magic while the rest of them enjoyed not having a Monday morning exam (although Ancient Runes revision filled James' hours). There was a tense undercurrent to the Defence Against the Dark Arts practical, none of them able to dispel the thoughts of _I might need to use this someday_. The examiners watched sternly and made pointed comments about how important it was that they retained this information.

For Lily, Potions was a bright spot in the middle of that second week. She wrote pages and pages, getting every tiny detail down, and was having one last read of her essay response when time was called. The practical session in the afternoon had gone perfectly (and she _might_ have caught a glimpse of Severus' cauldron on the way out, and she _might_ be feeling a bit smug after that). She'd had a day off while the Divination exams took place, and now she was facing Astronomy. Half of them had already finished a day or two earlier and were celebrating by enjoying the summer weather (which had arrived with a vengeance). Lily fanned herself with her sky chart, wishing she didn't have to wear robes for the exam. Next to her, Eliza was chanting lists of moons under her breath, and on her other side James was staring at the blank wall opposite with a look of intense concentration.

The theory exam was passable, leaving them an afternoon to wait and cram (or in many cases, nap) before the midnight practical. Unlike the other exams, this would be held at the top of the Astronomy Tower.

"Good evening, please make your way to the correct telescope. Do not speak or – well, you know the drill by now," an examiner said "In the case of serious clouds, the timer will be paused while we try to move them along, but it's set to be clear tonight. You have one and a half hours to observe and fill in your charts according to the instructions on your papers, and you may begin when the bell starts to ring for midnight."

The examiners paced around the top of the tower, while the students sat around aimlessly for five minutes or so before the first chime startled them into action.

 _Pick one of the five areas listed below to map in detail_

 _Sketch one Solar System object_

 _Sketch one deep sky object_

Lily pulled a face, but leant forwards to pick a target and focus her telescope, suppressing a yawn.

One map cramped with tiny handwriting, a coloured diagram of Jupiter (she'd gone for the easy option) and a rough smudge that was supposed to be a galaxy later, it was over. The examiners couldn't stop the whooping and shouting once the papers had been collected in, and quickly stopped trying as people made for the exit and rushed down the stairs.

"So, how are we going to celebrate our freedom?" James said cheerfully.

"By sleeping?" Elizabeth said, Jenny making tired noises of agreement.

"Boring," James said, sticking his tongue out "We have ages for sleeping ahead of us, we've only got one week left at Hogwarts!"

"And we can start enjoying that week in the morning," Jenny said.

"What are you going to do instead?" Lily asked, curiosity getting the better of her. She'd passed tired a while back and hit the stage where she wasn't sure if she could sleep if she tried.

"I don't know. Anything! We could wake up some of the others, or go on an adventure, or go to the kitchens, or sneak into-"

"I could manage the kitchens. You are still Head Boy for another week, you know."

"Excellent!" James ignored her reprimand "Celebratory food it is then, are you sure we can't persuade you two?"

Jenny yawned widely, shaking her head, and when they reached the bottom of the tower their little group split in two. Lily and James hung back, trying not to look like they were following the Hufflepuffs to their common room.

"Right, the coast is clear!" James said dramatically, poking his head around the corner of the corridor leading to the kitchens and darting for the entrance "What kind of midnight feast are we going to have?"

"One involving pudding," Lily said decisively.

Even in the early hours of the morning, the Hogwarts kitchens were active, although much quieter than usual. Several house elves were making bread for breakfast or cleaning pots and pans, and one was ironing a pile of the tea-towels they wore. None of them looked surprised to see the two students.

"What would young Master Potter be wanting?" one squeaked, appearing by their knees with alarming speed.

"Treacle tart," James began "Chocolate sponge pudding, warm custard, and… I think some ice cream. That sound good?" he turned to Lily "Oh, and whipped cream please!"

They thanked the house elves profusely as the took the pile of food, neatly packaged into boxes.

"They're showing off for you," James grumbled "We never get boxes!"

"They know you're happy to eat food out of your pockets," Lily snorted.

"Best get back upstairs with it," he advised "Always a bit awkward when you run into Hufflepuffs in here."

Gryffindor Common Room was completely empty, everyone sleeping off exams, so they claimed the best sofa next to the barely burning fire and settled down with the desserts stacked between them.

"I don't understand how you can like that stuff so much," Lily said, pointing a dangerously full spoon of sponge and custard at James' treacle tart.

"Treacle tart is wonderful," he said defensively "Have you even tried it?"

"It's just syrup and pastry!"

"That's just chocolate and sponge!"

"Chocolate makes everything better. Verifiable fact, Potter."

"Really, Evans? Over pudding? And I think you've been spending too much time with Moony."

"Possible," Lily conceded "But that doesn't change the fact that your pudding is inferior!"

"You just need to try some." James waved a forkful of tart at her threateningly.

"Never!" They were both laughing now, possibly somewhat hysterical from lack of sleep and the long fortnight of exams.

"Please?" It shouldn't be endearing that he couldn't even keep a straight face long enough to make proper puppy dog eyes. Lily laughed even harder, and James moved closer, still brandishing the dripping fork.

"You can't make-" Lily began. The fork hovered in front of her face. "Fine!"

It was about as sweet and sickly as she'd expected, but she kept eye contact with James, who was _literally feeding her pudding_ , and wondered if he'd taste like treacle tart if she kissed him.

James raised his free hand, and Lily jumped up.

"We should probably go to bed," she said, "It's three in the morning."

"Lily-"

But she was already hurrying up the stairs to the dorm, tossing a hasty "Goodnight!" over her shoulder.

* * *

 **Saturday 17** **th** **June 1978**

Lily woke late the next day. Sunlight was streaming in through the windows, and when she checked the clock she found it was early afternoon already. Something rustled on the duvet as she sat up, and she found a note in Eliza's familiar handwriting. _'Going outside, will be by the lake'_. She took a long shower and got dressed, enjoying the luxury of spare time for the first time in what felt like forever, and headed out of the castle at a relaxed pace.

Seven familiar figures were visible in the distance, some lounging in the sun while the others stuck to the shade of the beech tree. Suddenly, she didn't think she could face James. Even though everything that shouldn't have happened last night had been in her head, and there was no way he could know what she had been thinking…

"Lily flower!" Sirius shouted. He was paddling in the shallow edge of the lake, trousers rolled up and shirt hanging open "You'll come in with me, won't you? Everyone else is being boring," he gave Remus a pointed look "The Giant Squid isn't even here anymore, the fourth years keep feeding it."

James was watching her.

"Why not?" Lily shrugged and kicked her shoes off, poking her toes into the cool water. It was a hot day, after all.

"We were starting to wonder if you were ever going to wake up," Marlene said.

"Some of us had an exam at midnight!"

"So did we," Jenny pointed out, putting her book down to join the conversation "How were the kitchens?" She gave Marlene a significant look, which Marlene clearly understood and Lily wished that she didn't.

"We had pudding," she said.

"Lily is learning the wonders of treacle tart," James elaborated, grinning. Lily felt her face burning for no good reason. She blamed the sun.

"I hope we get results soon," Peter said, back to worrying about N.E.W.T.s again.

"We won't get them until the holidays Wormy, quit thinking about it," Sirius rolled his eyes and splashed in the direction of the people on the shore.

"Right, you're going to pay for that Black," Marlene strode into the lake with no care for her clothes.

"No! Mercy!" Sirius tried to run and ended up tripping himself, going down with a spectacular _splash_! Lily pulled a face, shaking herself off, but was soaked again an instant later when Sirius pulled Marlene down with him.

"Well, I guess we're swimming then," she sighed, giving up on staying dry.

Jenny and Remus remained at a safe distance from the water with their respective books, but eventually Sirius' whining (and the increasing heat) persuaded the others to join in. They swam and splashed at each other, and their little area of the lake was given a wide berth by other students.

Remus jumped a little as cool, wet hands covered his eyes and obscured his view, but then smiled.

"Hello Sirius."

The hands left his eyes, but remained draped around his neck, slowly turning the white shirt transparent.

"I was tempted to ask James to do it, to see if you got it wrong," Sirius said, "Sure you don't want to come in?"

"I'll get wet."

"That is the point, yes."

"I don't want to ruin my clothes."

"Well, take them off then," Sirius suggested hopefully.

Jenny coughed pointedly.

"Fine," Sirius flopped down over his lap "I'll stay here then."

"You don't have to stay."

"What are you reading?"

"Why do you want to know?" Remus asked suspiciously.

"I'm weighing up my chances of distracting you."

"You know what, I think I will go for a swim," Jenny stood and headed for the water "You kids have fun."

Remus set his book aside as well. He knew a lost cause when he saw one.

"So, why did you want to distract me? All of our friends are right over there…" Remus hoped that Sirius didn't _actually_ need that reminder.

"Well, I wanted to talk to you about something, actually." Sirius sat up, turning so that they were facing each other. Remus would worry about the nervous tone, but Sirius was still basically sitting in his lap. It was hard to get concerned under these circumstances.

"Go on," he prompted.

"We're done with Hogwarts now, or close enough… On Saturday, we'll go home. To separate homes." Sirius was taking his time getting to the point.

"You're going back to James', right? We'll see each other all the time," Remus promised.

"No. Well, yes, I am going back there first, and we will see each other… But I want to get my own place. There's that money Uncle Alphard left me, and I don't know, it seems like the first step."

"That's great, Sirius," Remus said, kissing him briefly. "Do you know where yet?"

"Not exactly, I mean, I've got some ideas. But I think 'who with' is more important than 'where' right now."

Remus finally caught on to where this was going.

"Remus…"

He'd been avoiding thinking about the future after exams a bit too successfully, he thought. He should have prepared.

"Would you move in with me?" Sirius finished.

Remus thought that he should probably want his own independence, to support himself first. He should want to date casually for a bit longer before they took that step. Honestly though, he'd just be going back to his parents' house and his childhood bedroom until a miracle happened and he found a job that would hire a werewolf. And they'd never exactly been casual. He remembered seven years of seeing Sirius before bed and first thing in the morning (often unconscious), every day of term time.

"Yes."

Sirius whooped and threw himself forwards, knocking Remus over backwards. His laughter was quickly cut short by Sirius' mouth on his.

A loud wolf whistle interrupted their celebrations, and Remus unwillingly opened his eyes as they disentangled themselves to see Marlene standing over them with one eyebrow raised, dripping wet.

"There are twelve-year olds out here, you know," she said, lying down in the sun to dry off.

Sirius attempted to brush off the dirt that had attached itself to his wet clothes, while Remus willed his blush away. He couldn't do anything about the smile though. That was here to stay.

* * *

 **Friday 23** **rd** **June 1978**

They spent their final week at Hogwarts enjoying the hot and sunny weather, playing four versus four games of Quidditch (nothing to the standards of the Quidditch Cup final that year), swimming in the lake and tickling the Giant Squid, exploring the castle, and generally enjoying everything that Hogwarts in summer had to offer. In the evenings they played games in the common room (although Twister never made a reappearance), walked outside in the cooler evening air, or just sat around talking. Mid-week was briefly marred by Remus' usual monthly disappearance, but he returned the next day looking only a little tired, lying on the grass with Sirius while the others splashed around. The days passed quickly though, and all too soon it was time for the end of term feast.

This was the first time Lily could remember being anything other than excited for the occasion. There had always been another year of Hogwarts ahead, another year of lessons and sharing a dorm with the others. This year, it was the end.

The eight of them sat at what had become their usual spot this year, and waited for the hall to fill, talking among themselves. Eventually everyone was seated – all the students in their houses, and the staff along the top table – and Professor Dumbledore stood. Silence fell.

"Another year at Hogwarts over," he began, smiling out at them all "And another set of excellent students leaving us. I will save you from an old man's nostalgia though and move on to the House Cup! In fourth place, we have Ravenclaw, with two hundred and ninety-three points."

There was a polite round of applause from the hall.

"In third place, Slytherin, with three hundred and twenty points." More applause. "In second place with three hundred and sixty-eight points, Hufflepuff," the cheers were louder now "And of course, with three hundred and ninety-nine points, the House Cup goes to Gryffindor, following their excellent Quidditch performance!"

They were clapping and cheering before Dumbledore even finished his sentence, with particular excitement from the younger years.

"And now, let us celebrate a wonderful year of magic!" Dumbledore clapped his hands, and the platters and bowls filled up with their usual impressive selection of food.

"You know what," Sirius said, "I think I'm going to miss the cooking most of all. Do you reckon I could kidnap a house elf?"

"Oi, what about us?" Peter said.

"I didn't think I was getting rid of you lot."

"Well, I'll miss Quidditch most," James declared, to nobody's surprise.

I know what I'll miss most, Lily thought.

"You could go professional," Marlene suggested. James hmm-ed thoughtfully.

"More importantly," Sirius said around a forkful of potatoes "We need to go out with a bang. Give Hogwarts the end of year party it'll never forget. We've been too quiet this year – the Marauders need to go down in history!"

"I'm not going to miss you talking with your mouth full," Jenny muttered.

"You could have mentioned the party thing earlier, so we could actually get supplies," Peter said.

"It's not a spontaneous party if you plan it. We'll go right after the feast, get everything ready, spread the word, and then it'll be go time."

* * *

It was indeed 'go time', Lily thought. They'd told everyone they knew, shoved the sofas and chairs to the edges of the common room, helped Remus carry up enormous volumes of food from the kitchens, done the awkward job of going in and out of the portrait hole to let people in, and now the party was in full swing. Students from all four houses were present (although admittedly Slytherins were in the minority), loud music was playing, the drinks were flowing (and some of them were really very alcoholic, if the way the room was tilting a bit was any indication), and every now and then someone set off indoor fireworks.

"Alright there?" James had woven his way through the crowd towards her. "You look like you need a new drink, here."

Lily went to protest that she already had a drink, but then looked down and realised he'd swapped her half empty glass for a full one of water

"Thanks. This is kind of unbelievable."

"Yeah, you've got to be impressed by Sirius' ability to pull off a wild party in less than two hours."

"Not that – well, yes – but I mean, the end. And this year. If you'd told me one year ago that we'd be friends, I wouldn't have believed you."

"I don't think I would have, either."

"You were the one who wanted us to be – friends," Lily changed the ending of her sentence quickly. She was definitely a bit tipsy.

"Doesn't mean I thought I had a chance."

"Ah. Sorry."

"Water under the bridge. And, to be fair, I was kind of a little shit. At times," James admitted.

"At times?" Lily teased.

"None of us can be held accountable for what we did when we were fourteen, okay?"

Lily thought back on fourth year and shuddered a little.

"Fair point."

"Lily! Come dance with us!" Eliza appeared, seemingly out of nowhere, and tugged on Lily's arm, whisking her off towards the designated dancefloor where Marlene and Jenny were waving their arms in the air with the abandon of the truly drunk. Marlene spun her in a circle (and the room kept spinning afterwards), and Lily kept hold of one of Jenny's hands for balance after that. The water had done the trick though, and as midnight approached she felt increasingly sober. She was glad – she'd never want to forget any of this. Sirius and Remus were swaying in the middle of everyone, ignoring how inappropriate the music was for slow dancing – the dance they hadn't got at the Christmas ball. Remus was standing up straight for once, taking advantage of the slight height difference as Sirius rested his head on Remus' shoulder. Marlene, Jenny and Eliza were all still dancing energetically nearby, Jenny attempting to teach Peter some new moves. And James…

James was standing on the opposite side of the dancing, doing the exact same thing as her. Taking it all in, one last time. He looked in her direction, and their eyes met for a moment.

The moment was broken by Marlene, camera in hand.

"Group photo! Quit being soppy Black and get your arse here."

They bunched up, Jenny's arm around her waist and James resting his arm across her shoulders. She glanced towards him just as the flash went off, quickly looking forwards again, smiling widely.

* * *

 **Saturday 24** **th** **June 1978**

The dorm was empty of the usual debris of odd socks, sweets, books, quills, and other odd bits. Her trunk was packed and shut, waiting to be taken to the train by the house elves. Their photos and posters had been removed from the walls. The girls' dormitory looked exactly as it had when they'd moved in seven years ago.

Lily walked down the stairs, saying goodbye to the common room in her head. First through sixth years were still milling around chatting, or upstairs doing last minute packing, but the seventh years stood in a purposeful clump by the door.

"Ready to go?" Marlene asked as she approached. She nodded.

They made their way through the empty corridors, footsteps echoing, and out onto the lawns. The sun was already bright in the sky, and they squinted as they joined the seventh years from other houses, lining up on the grass just below the castle. Professor Dumbledore stood in front of them with the four Heads of House.

"Seven years of education are behind you, and we hope that they have given you the tools you need to succeed in life. My only regret is that the world you are going out into is not as… safe as it once was, or as it should be. Wherever your future takes you…"

Lily looked around at the others, all still listening to Dumbledore's speech. Sirius and Remus were holding hands. Several members of the crowd were getting a little emotional. She turned to James and accidentally caught his eye, quickly looking away again. At least the sunburn from spending the last week outside hid her blushing. She hoped.

"… Finally, all that is left to say is good luck." Professor Dumbledore's speech came to a close, and the small audience clapped. Professor McGonagall could be seen wiping at her eyes.

"Now, to the boats please," she called, voice thick. They descended the stairs to the docks, which were much less steep than Lily remembered from their arrival, and split up into fours.

Lily was sharing her boat with Marlene, Jenny and Eliza. To her left, the oddly serious looking Marauders filled another boat. Now that they were all a bit taller than when they were eleven or twelve, their knees bumped together and they sat with their elbows tucked in. Hagrid stepped into the final boat, which wobbled alarmingly, and then waved his pink umbrella. The boats moved forwards smoothly, and Lily turned with everyone else to watch Hogwarts disappear into the distance. Her final view of the castle was a kind of strange inverse of her first: then it had been dark, stars twinkling above it and lights shining in the windows. Today, the sun beat down on the bricks, bathing the castle in bright, clean light. Despite the maze-like nature of the buildings, she felt like she knew the corridors hiding inside those walls. Then there had been a sense of wonder and excitement; now, sadness and the start of nostalgia filled her. They sat in silence.

The boats bumped up against the dock on the opposite side of the lake in what seemed like no time at all. The bustling platform at Hogsmeade station broke the spell, and soon they were laughing and chattering as usual while they retrieved their luggage and went to claim seats on the train.

"Should we be doing rounds or something?" Remus asked as the train pulled out of the station. They were all jammed into one compartment.

"Nah," James snorted "We've graduated now. Officially not our problem if they want to do something stupid."

"Let's just enjoy the journey," Lily agreed.

"Exploding Snap, anyone?" Peter pulled out a pack of cards.

"Sure."

They played the first half of the journal away, tensing every time someone laid a card – there was a certain amount of risk involved when you play with the cards on your knees – until food arrived.

"Anything from the trolley, dears?"

"I was wrong. I'll miss you most of all," Sirius sighed wistfully, staring at the rows of sweets and cakes. They bought far more food than was healthy, and the Exploding Snap was abandoned in favour of eating.

"It's been a really weird year," Eliza said thoughtfully.

"Yeah, who would have thought we'd see these two in the same carriage?" Marlene gestured between James and Lily "And look! No hexing! I'm so proud."

"We can change that." Lily gave her a threatening look. James just laughed.

"Who'd have thought we'd see Marley date the same person for more than two months?" Jenny said, teasing.

"Hey! Anyway, we broke up," Marlene said breezily "It's fine, we just figured we wouldn't see each other after Hogwarts really. Mutual agreement," she continued, forestalling any sympathy.

"Well, Remus and I have some happier news…" Sirius paused.

"Oh Merlin, you're actually getting married, aren't you?" James said.

"No! We're just going to look for a flat together."

"Oh good, I don't have to wear dress robes for that."

"You realise you need to meet my parents first though, right?" Remus said to Sirius.

"Wait, what? I've already met your parents!" Sirius looked horrified.

"Not since we started dating."

"Oh shit."

"It'll be fine. You'll be charming as usual, I'm sure."

"Well, I won't inflict my parents on you, I promise."

"Mum and Dad might want to get in on that though," James grinned "You are basically adopted, and it's not like they're going to get to mock me about it any time soon."

"They have plenty of other things to make fun of you for, don't worry," Marlene said.

The hours passed, and the sun was sinking towards the horizon again by the time the Hogwarts Express arrived at Platform Nine and Three Quarters. The sky was streaked with pink and orange to the west. They dragged their cases off the train, and then stood around on the platform.

"So…" Eliza began.

"We'll all see each other again soon," Sirius said confidently, before things could get too awkward.

"There's the World Cup, at the very least," Marlene pointed out.

"The Quidditch World Cup is not the least of _anything_ ," James said "But I can see my parents, so we should probably get a move on. We'll all write, yeah?"

There were hugs, and promises to keep in touch, and then all of a sudden everyone was gone. James and Sirius headed off to Mr and Mrs Potter, Marlene went to a quiet spot to apparate. Lily found her parents, talking happily with Mr Lupin.

"Hello love," her mother said as they approached, hugging her. "We ran into Lyall on the way in, so we thought we'd come wait for you on this side. Journey okay?"

Mr Lupin hugged Remus, and they exchanged pleasantries as they headed for the barrier between the platform and the Muggle world. Mr Evans took Lily's case.

"Exams all okay?" Mr Lupin asked.

"Not bad," Remus said, Lily nodding in agreement.

"Transfiguration probably could have been better," she added.

"No use worrying now," Mrs Evans said cheerfully "Results will come when they come. We're going to visit Petunia tomorrow for Sunday lunch, you'll have to come with us and see the new house, very nice it is. Down in Surrey, did I tell you?"

"You mentioned it," Lily said, exchanging looks with Remus. This put a bit of a damper on her first weekend home.

"No doubt Vernon will want to show you the new car as well," Mr Evans said, with a very good attempt at sound like he cared. No doubt about that, Lily thought, probably loudly as well, so that the neighbours can all hear how nice and expensive it is. "We've parked the car a bit further out, we need to get the tube first, are you ready to go?"

Lily hugged Remus.

"Write soon. Don't let them do anything too stupid."

"When have I ever managed to stop them?" he said.

"Fair point. Bye!"

They waved and went off in opposite directions.

"So, got any exciting plans for the holidays?" her mother asked.

"Not much. We're all going to the Quidditch World Cup final in August, but that's about it so far."

"Where do they hold that then? Somewhere like Hogwarts?"

"I don't know exactly, it's in the French countryside apparently…"

"This magic business sounds like fun," her father sighed "Wouldn't mind a holiday there myself."

As usual, Lily slept most of the way home, occasionally drifting to consciousness for a few minutes before the quiet radio and her parents' soft voices sent her back to sleep.


End file.
